If you don't know what to do,
Better to do NOTHING.
Great minds set goals;
other people follow their desires. (one)
Even greater minds, who are called sages, overcoming their own egoistic vital and mental desires, try to unravel the Divine idea, find out the goals of the universe and pursue their fulfillment.
But these are all high matters, but we will start with the banal everyday life. Do you often find yourself in a situation where it is difficult for you to make a decision, you are not sure of the right choice, or you have no idea at all what you need to do at the moment, or there is simply nothing to do? With rare exceptions, quite often. And what, may I ask, are your actions?
In fact, as you probably already understood, the technique is simple to genius: “When you don’t know WHAT to do, it’s better to do NOTHING.” Let's try to explain. In all cases and situations where there is no clear information, instructions, orders, knowledge of what exactly needs to be done at a given historical moment, how to act, your task, if possible, is simply to do nothing, i.e. not to make any unnecessary body and thought movements. Here, literally, sit down and do nothing, or even better lie down and fall asleep - rest, recuperate and save vital energy. Here you can refer to the centuries-old practices in Orthodoxy - smart silence, hesychasm, in Buddhism, yoga - the silence of the mind; during such periods of "inactivity" you can do prayer, meditation, reflection. And don’t worry, after some time, after a few minutes, hours, and maybe even a day (it happens) you will clearly know that everything is enough to rest, it’s time to get down to business, and, most importantly, you will be completely know exactly which one.
Notes on the way. Eight-year-old Sonya walks around me and urges:
— Mom, well, I have nothing to do... What should I do?.. Can I turn on the TV?
“Do you want me to tell you how you can find out what to do?” I remembered the technique. - Lie down on the sofa, calm down and ask God “What should I do?”, And listen to what they tell you. Just listen carefully, and do not invent yourself.
Sonya went, lay down on the sofa, a minute later she got up and, shrugging her shoulders, so thoughtfully, in a singsong voice:
Hm, he doesn't answer. Busy.
You wake up in the morning, you probably have a plan for the day: get up, wash up, have breakfast, complete work quotas, go to the store, cook dinner, etc. Living the day, you follow the plan you have developed, which includes all the tasks necessary for today, what is important to do today. And you do it all consistently. Know and go. As a rule, working family people have days scheduled literally by the minute, and no questions or doubts arise: “What to do next?”. You pray for only one thing: "If only there was enough strength and time for everything." Well, if you live according to the Strategy of your life and in accordance with your own Conscience, we can only rejoice for you, you have no time to be bored and suffer from idleness.
But if suddenly, in the middle of the day, you don’t know what you need to do next, then a quiet panic gradually begins, growing into a senseless fuss: “What would you do? After all, something needs to be done! I can't sit idle!" And here it is important not to succumb to the temptation to “invent” this business for yourself, i.e. force yourself to do something that absolutely no one needs: start calling girlfriends, go shopping, wash the floor for the tenth time in the last week, sit down to study the Portuguese language ... But you never know what a person can come up with just like that, out of boredom, and then to be surprised that in the evening there is no strength even to watch TV, the wallet is empty, and important things are somehow forgotten in the bustle.
Idleness does not at all consist in the fact that a person sits idle, “folding his arms” in the literal sense. No, the idler is always busy: he talks on the phone (sometimes for hours), goes to visit, sits at the TV and watches everything, sleeps for a long time, thinks up different things for himself. In general, an idler is always very busy ... (2)
So what to do? First of all, do not fuss and do not rush. Sit down (or lie down if conditions allow), relax, calm down and spend a few minutes alone with yourself. You can work with the mantra (Lecture No. 1.1.5.1.) If you fall asleep, it's good, but it happens rarely, good owners and workers almost never have something that they have absolutely nothing to do. Therefore, we guarantee that in just a couple of minutes you will have a completely clear and clear idea of WHAT it would be good to do at the moment. And you just get up and start doing the task. And here already, if you are sure of its necessity and correctness, give all your best, bring the matter to the end, no matter what it costs you.
Naturally, it is naive to expect that something brilliant will come to your mind, although we also do not exclude such an option, but most likely it will be an ordinary household matter that you have been thinking about for a long time and knew that sooner or later you will have to do it, but now you received a direct instruction that this should be done right now: water the flowers, cook borscht, wash the curtains, go to the store, write a letter, mend a sock, play with the baby, or maybe cut, paint, glue ... That's all. Nothing complicated. If the thought came: “But should I reread Anna Karenina?” Take and read. Who knows what semantic depths will open before you today, precisely in modern conditions. Maybe you will come across a solution to a problem that has been bothering you throughout the year. Who knows ... Yes, the same banal “Something I haven’t called Masha for a long time” now, after it came to your mind in this way, will be necessary and sufficient, and Masha will be surprised for a long time: “I’ve been thinking about you all week, but I just can’t get through,” and not grumble: “And aren’t you tired of calling?”. If today it’s better for you to do nothing at all, then no thoughts will come to your mind, you will take a nap for an hour or two with a clear conscience, until a new, relevant already at that moment, problem wakes you up. In the end, maybe it's time to relax, build up strength, and the body, knowing everything better than you, chose the right moment for this, because only it knows what things are ahead of you in two hours and what forces it will cost you. And after sleeping, you will get up alert and fresh and continue your day, and you will achieve much more effective results in matters that are really important to you than if you spent these two hours on cleaning, gymnasts, reading-teachings and other similar pastimes invented by you.
Example? Suppose you are a businessman, and suddenly, in the middle of the working day, you have a “window” in your schedule, and most importantly, you don’t really know how you will end your day, i.e. your plan for today seems to be exhausted, and you, without thinking it over and without “asking for advice”, rush to the gym in the hope of throwing off an extra pound. But suddenly, an hour later, as you started your physical exercises, you receive a message from the secretary that you are invited to an important meeting, and you, not being able to refuse, in sweat and soap, exhausted, in disheveled feelings, hungry, rush to another end of town back to the office. Outcome? Throughout the conversation, you think about whether you look decent and whether you smell of sweat, your stomach aches from hunger, and therefore the content of the conversation floats away and the decision is made rashly. If you acted differently, sit and think for an extra five minutes, you would understand or you would be “prompted” that today you could look through all the papers under the planned contract again, request additional information, or at least just relax or go to a restaurant to have lunch, and at the same time to brainstorm once more, you see, and the contract would be signed on more favorable terms for you. And it was worth it just to take your time and ask an elementary question: “What to do now?” And so in everything and always. Just? We think it's brilliant.
As you master these techniques and reorganize your life, your daily schedule will gradually improve in the direction of saving time and effort, i.e. there will be more and more of them, therefore, more and more often you will find yourself in the situation described above. And every time you run into the vacated time space, try to calm down, relax and ask yourself the question “What should I do now?”, And in a few minutes your brain (you can call it “my intuition” for now, although we’ll say right away that this is not her) will provide you with the necessary information and indicate the field of activity. So, all your pressing material and everyday problems will be slowly solved, and then opportunities for self-improvement will open up in all three components, body, soul, mind: there will be time and circumstances for sports, good rest, reading, learning, talking, communication, etc. .
And how, you ask, to act in cases where the answer to a question received from the outside world is required in a matter of seconds, and you stand at a loss and are not able to make a decision with lightning speed? If possible, it is best to ask for a delay, such as “the morning is wiser than the evening”, delay the time as much as possible, and try to wait (or think of) a clear, unambiguous answer when you are firmly convinced that this is the only way. We repeat: any action is recommended to be performed only if you are absolutely sure that it is necessary and correct for you at a given time. If you really need an instant reaction, trust your first feeling or body. In the event of a real danger, psychomotor must manifest itself, the body will definitely react. Unfortunately, in previously identified, now fatal cases, it will be extremely difficult to help you, although not impossible. Try to start learning, maybe, if the opportunity arises, you will achieve the ability to influence events not only present and future, but also the past.
If there is no instant answer to a question, “doing nothing” does not mean at all pushing the problem aside, like the notorious Scarlett (“I won’t think about it today, I’ll think about it tomorrow.”), and forget about it. It is important to continue to think about it, analyze it, look for a way out and try to decide on a solution. Only under the condition of your restlessness, it may “illuminate” you in the end. And again: it is best to start real actions when you are sure of the correctness of the illuminating decision, i.e. review everything from start to finish.
"I'll sum up the situation," said Ostap cheerfully. - Passive: not a penny of money, three chairs are leaving down the river, there is nowhere to spend the night and not a single badge of the children's commission. Asset: a guide to the Volga of the edition of one thousand nine hundred and twenty-six (I had to borrow from Monsieur Simbievich in the cabin). Deficit-free balance is very difficult to bring. You will have to spend the night at the pier. ... The situation is much more serious than I thought. Getting money out of Vasyukintsy seems to me so far an unsolvable task. And we need at least thirty roubles. Firstly, we need to eat and, secondly, we need to overtake the circulation pelvis and meet with the Kolumbovites on land, in Stalingrad.
Ippolit Matveyevich curled up like an old, thin cat after a skirmish with a young rival - the ebullient owner of roofs, attics and dormer windows.
Ostap walked along the shops, thinking and combining. By one o'clock in the morning a magnificent plan was ready. Bender lay down next to his companion and fell asleep. (3)
And as you probably guessed, one of the most dangerous phrases in our lives is the question “How would I kill time?”. If you belong to the “time killer” caste, to those who often ask this question, then we can state with confidence that there is no Theme, no Idea, no strategic meaning in your life, to which all your daily tactics are subordinated. After all, an internal desire for a goal guarantees constant employment, even if not related to the specific implementation of projects, but aimed at expanding one's knowledge and skills on a chosen topic, i.e. for self-education and self-education. Truly purposeful people have scheduled days by the minute, and those who have achieved solid results in their field and made a serious career often do not even have time for a proper and well-deserved vacation. Moreover, they are forced to pay increased attention to one specific component of the trinity, leading in their activities, sometimes to the detriment of the other two.
We have very little money.
“You keep talking about it all the time.
Maybe it's time to get a job?
- I'm not going to work. I already have a good job and I can't afford to spend time making money. (four)
You don't know what to do with your free time? But others know this very well. They will not fail to suggest where you invest your time and money, and sometimes your health. See, don't fall for the bait. “Filter the market”, i.e. comprehend what is offered to you by numerous mass media fulfilling someone's order, entertainment companies working for someone else's (not your!) pocket, sects caring about their ambitions and the like. In no case do we dissuade you from rest and entertainment, we simply urge you to be more careful.
Unhappy people live better in the city. A man can live in a city for a hundred years and not miss the fact that he died and rotted long ago. There is no time to deal with yourself, everything is busy. Affairs, public relations, health, arts, health of children, their upbringing. It is necessary to accept those and these, go to these and those; then you need to look at this one, listen to this one or this one. Indeed, in the city at any given moment there is one, or even two or three celebrities at once, who cannot be missed in any way. Either you need to treat yourself, this or that, then teachers, tutors, governesses, and life is empty-empty. Well, that's how we lived and felt less pain from cohabitation. (5)
It remains to add that the waste of time, effort and attention on things that are not dictated by the true necessity of your life and not confirmed by unshakable confidence is not only an unrewarding occupation, but also frankly vicious. You misuse your precious life energy, health and intellectual wealth, which could be saved and spent on things that are more relevant not only for you, but also for your loved ones. Moreover, being distracted in this way, you run the risk of missing really important information and passing by really important things that your life as a whole will depend on. So, be extremely careful in choosing when you "do not know what to do." Avoid unnecessary knowledge!
Fedyashev closed his eyes and sighed sadly.
— Hypochondria toils, - explained the aunt.
- I see! said the doctor, pouring himself another glass. “Hypochondria is a cruel voluptuousness that keeps the spirit in an uninterrupted sad state… Here medicine knows different means… Here, for example, this…” He raised his filled glass.
— Doesn't accept! sighed my aunt.
“So, they started the disease,” the doctor shook his head and drank. - There is another way: tempering the soul by lowering the body into the hole ...
— Wise! Aunt approved. - But it's summer now - where can I get an ice hole?
"That's it," sighed the doctor. - Then there is a third way - conversation. The word heals, the conversation drives away the thought. Do you want to talk, sir? The doctor ate his fill and lit his pipe. (6)
It is necessary to warn that this technique is only one of the many consequences of the fundamental principle of the SP Teaching - the Principle of Solid Yes (Lecture No. 2.1.2.1.), but you can get acquainted with it even before studying the Principle itself in order to a) you come to the Principle itself already more prepared, because it is often much easier to understand the whole when you get used to the particular; b) during this time you will accumulate a solid base of your own experiments; c) despite its apparent simplicity and banality, the technique is so important that any delay can be costly; d) it is directly related to the topic of the lecture “On the goals and tasks of the neophyte” (No. 1.2.1.) and will help you cope with uncertainty if you have not yet decided on the choice, and will also help you avoid fuss.
Notes:
- W. Irving.
- D. Likhachev. Notes and observations. - L .: Owls. writer, 1989, p. 316.
- I. Ilf, E. Petrov. The twelve Chairs. //I.Ilf, E.Petrov. Collected works. - M .: Art.lit., 1961, Vol. 1, p. 312.
- Dialogue from the film "Total Eclipse", dir. A. Holland, 1997.
- L. Tolstoy. Kreutzer Sonata. // L. Tolstoy. Sobr. op. - M .: Hood. lit., 1964., T. 12, p. 176.
- G. Gorin. Love Formula. // Anthology of Satire and Humor of Russia of the XX century: G. Gorin. - M .: Eksmo-Press, 2000, p. 345.
Theses:
¨ “Great minds set goals; other people follow their desires.”
¨ The technique “If you don’t know WHAT to do, it’s better to do NOTHING” is one of the consequences of the Principle of a Firm Yes.
¨ In all cases and situations where there is no clear information, instructions, orders, knowledge, WHAT specifically needs to be done at a given historical moment, how to act, the task is to, if possible, simply do nothing, i.e. . not to make any unnecessary body and thought movements.
¨ If a person is confident in the necessity and correctness of the task, he is obliged to give everything one hundred percent, to bring the matter to the end, no matter what it costs him.
¨ If a person lives according to the Strategy of his life and in accordance with his own Conscience, he has no time to be bored and suffer from idleness.
¨ Resist the temptation to invent unnecessary things.
¨ Every time you have free time, try to calm down, relax and ask yourself the question “What should I do now?”, And in a few minutes your brain will provide the necessary information and indicate the field of activity.
¨ If you need an instant reaction, but you do not know what to do, trust your first feeling or body.
¨ You can not push the problem into the far corner, it is important to continue to think about it.
¨ One of the most dangerous phrases in life is the question "How would I kill time?".
¨ Striving for the goal guarantees constant employment, even if not related to the specific implementation of projects, but aimed at expanding one's knowledge and skills on the chosen topic, i.e. for self-education and self-education.
¨ When choosing ways to relax, you must also be very careful.
¨ Wasting time, energy and attention on things that are not dictated by the true necessity of life and not confirmed by unshakable confidence is not only an ungrateful occupation, but also frankly vicious.
¨ Avoid unnecessary knowledge!
It is only in Hollywood blockbusters that superheroes save long-suffering humanity from evil forces without blinking an eye. But life has its own “cinema”: I can very decently “stupid” when they are rude to me in a minibus or get lost in a foreign city.
And what can we say about more serious situations - loss of a job, parting with a loved one, betrayal of a friend and other life "darkness"?
So what do you do when you don't know what to do? After all, with a phrase from the "Diamond Arm" "Chief, everything is gone! Everything is lost!" grief will not help.
Calmly! Psychologists have developed a step-by-step plan for getting out of difficult life situations.
When you don't know what to do: from hysteria to complete adequacy
Step #1. We turn off the tantrum.
And this means that we stop tearing our hair out and have dinner sets (in the end, they will still be useful to us). Instead, we fall on the sofa with a cup of mint tea and try to catch our “zen”. The ideal option is to get a good night's sleep.
Step #2. "Tear claws" on nature.
Nothing makes thoughts so transparent, like spring water, like gatherings somewhere on the banks of the river.
And the wrinkles in the corners of the eyes are best smoothed out by a week of wallowing by the sea in warm regions - tested on myself.
Hmm, if it’s really “sad” with time and money, then go to the park for at least a couple of hours - you look and insight will come down what to do when you don’t know what to do with yourself, or with your life, or even with an orchid on the windowsill, which stubbornly does not want to bloom.
Step #3. "Write, write, the paper does not turn red."
Having admired nature enough, come back home, take a piece of paper and write in as much detail as possible about the situation in which you do not know what to do.
Don't worry about literary style - you're not writing memoirs, but throwing rubbish out of your head.
Step number 4. Analyze it.
So, now it's time to turn on your "reason" to its fullest, that is, to analyze how you managed to drive yourself into a corner or allowed someone to do this to you. And, accordingly, remember this alignment so that this does not happen again.
For example, you quarreled with your mother because she didn’t like your boyfriend. It would seem that this is definitely a bad event.
But, if you seriously think about what to do when you don’t know what to do in such a situation, you will understand:
- Hooray! Finally, you have outgrown your inner “good girl” and are ready to build your own life without looking back at your parents;
- now you do not need to hide your missus from the watchful mother's eye, which means that breathing has become much freer;
- from now on, you know exactly how to act when your mother is unhappy with your personal life - to bend your line. And it's not fatal!
- next time you will more easily endure parental disapproval, since the experience is already there;
- you showed your loved one how dear he is to you by going against your parental will. And it's worth a lot, especially when you don't really know what to do.
With such a “makar”, in fact, you can make out any life situation, so go for it!
Step number 5. Brainstorm.
Oh, this is the most interesting thing to do when you don't know where to go, where to go.
Imagine that your best friend Kolya came to you with the same problem as you and said: “If you want it, you don’t want it, but help me out – come up with 101 ways to get out of a lousy situation.”
Here it is important not to restrain yourself, but to write everything, even the most absurd, at first glance, thoughts.
Let's say you lost your job, and since you live in a tiny town, it's oh so difficult to find a job here. You can start from the quite logical “I’ll call everyone I know - suddenly someone heard about vacancies” to the fantastic “I’ll write to the Queen of England - I read on the Internet that she fired the maid.”
And the decision of what to do when you do not know how to do the right thing will be somewhere in the middle.
How to get out of depression on your own?
Step number 6. “I have a plan, it is very daring…”
Of all these 101 ways (well, ok, you can do 50), choose those that really help when you don’t know what to do. Arrange all these insights of yours in the form of a clear plan (for a day, a week, a month, a year - depending on the complexity of the situation and your determination) - and go ahead with the song!
It turned out to "resolve" the problem - super, we are happy for you! Not? Hmm, go back to step #1 and start all over again.
Step number 7. Great things are ahead of us.
And now, having rolled up our sleeves and sighed for the last time about our evil fate, we begin to carry out our ingenious anti-crisis plan.
And if you do not know what to do, faced with a difficult choice, experts recommend using several methods.
How to choose and not make a mistake?
Method number 1. Heads or tails? That's the question when you don't know what to choose.
No, we are not offering to decide with a coin where you go on vacation - to Brazil, "where there are a lot of wild monkeys" or good old Egypt.
But when you can’t choose from two options, esotericists recommend tossing a coin and carefully listening to your feelings: if, for example, “tails” means Brazil, and your inner voice yells: “What did you think, dumbass? Which Brazil? What jungle? I want to lie quietly and peacefully on the Egyptian beach! ”, Then you should not pretend to be Amerigo Vespucci.
In a word, we throw and listen to our intuition, open the chakras, tune the antennas.
Method number 2. Lists, lists and scribbles.
This method is perfect for those who firmly believe in analytics and rational, uncomplicated choice: just take a blank piece of paper and write the pros and cons of your potential choice.
Let's say you decide whether you need to leave your native village of Zyuzyulkino and move to a metropolis.
And since it's time to figure out what to do in this situation, when you don't know what to do:
- remember that in a big city you will have big earnings, interesting acquaintances and leisure time a little more interesting than eating fried sunflower seeds at a village club;
- however, you must be prepared for fierce competition for good jobs, a rented apartment, and that blue-eyed macho you have been looking for in the gym.
Method number 3. Look not for a woman, but for a successful person when you don't know what to do.
Well, everything is clear here, like God's day: when you need to cook just the same brilliant borscht - consult a familiar cook, if you need to decide what to do with your completely unbelted child - go to your beloved old teacher.
Method number 4. The truth is not in wine, but in a dream, when you don’t know what to do.
Need to decide what to do when you don't know what to do? Then go over in your head all the options for solving a difficult issue and go to bed. And let you not dream of Palma de Mallorca, but a brilliant business plan or a completely innovative method of teaching English.
What to do if life is a complete mess and you do not know what to do next?
Method number 5. What is Superman? I myself am very personal!
No, we are not proposing to take over the universe armed with an atomic bomb. But imagining how a person who is your authority acted in your difficult situation is a very effective way to decide what to do when it is not clear what to do.
If you are not tempted by the prospect of imagining yourself as the president of the United States or, at worst, Spider-Man, psychologists recommend asking yourself a few questions when making difficult life choices:
7 "magic" questions
Now, knowing about all these techniques for making the right decision, when it is not entirely clear what to do, when you do not know what to do, you will be calm as a boa constrictor. Hmm, even in that "hard" case when you have to choose between the shades of lipsticks "Wild Purple" and "Fiery Red".
Are you completely confused?
There is darkness in the head, fog around, thoughts are more difficult to catch than a perch with your bare hands?
And this state, unfortunately, is not a consequence of a pleasant and cheerful holiday. Or rather his long absence?
And you don't like where you are right now? No, I'm not talking about walls (although they can annoy you). I'm talking about the life situation. You didn’t dream about it at all and aspired not here?
Then you have come to the right place. Your time has come make decisions and change lives. How?
Enough questions, let's move on to the answers.
What to do when you don't know what to do?
Step one - calm down
Put your hands down, stop tantrums, stop tearing your hair out and swooning from uncertainty. Allow yourself to relax: take a bath, drink a cup of coffee (tea, compote). Cognac is better not to get involved. If possible, be sure to sleep well.
Step two - forward to nature
How often people in cities, especially large ones, close themselves in their birdhouses. And if you are reading these lines,then you probably dive into social networks from time to time, personal diaries, network games and othersdelights of the internet, from which it is not so easy to escape even for a person with a stable psyche.
So, forward to nature! Preferably for a week. But if circumstances do not allow - for the whole day. If it’s really bad - for 2-3 hours in the park with a dog, with a bicycle, roller skates, c children or simply, alone with yourself, contemplating the harmony of nature and enjoying the beauty of the current season.
After that, it will begin to dissipate, the anxiety will melt. And useful thoughts descend from Olympus. If this did not happen, then
Step three - release
Take a piece of paper and write down everything you don't like about your life. Describe in detail the situation in which you have driven yourself, or someone has driven you. Describe "someone" well too, just in case (he won't know about it). Don't spare paper.
And now, attention is an important point:
Make up your mind that you really don't like it. Then you can, without much regret, part once and for all with an unloved job, with emotions of fear, pity, anger.
and to yourself first and foremost. will set you free and give you extra energy.
If something is a pity, you will have to live as you lived until you press it again. 😉
Step four - break the connection
Second important point:
Analyze what led you to this situation, and what conclusions you can draw from this. What did life want to tell you when it planted such a pig? If you do not do this, then very quickly you will again be left with nothing. Then write down all the conclusions on a separate sheet, and preferably in a notebook.
Step Five - Brainstorm
Imagine that a neighbor came to you and told about his troubles (troubles, oddly enough, are exactly yours).
give him 101 advice on getting out of this situation. Write whatever comes to mind: janitor, before bowing to the President of America. The wider, farther, deeper, higher, and freer you think, the more realistic and viable options will begin to emerge.
Have you written? Can have a smokedrink tea. It's good to make another outing into nature.
If a dead end has come in life and a person simply does not know what to do next and what to do? If everything around is annoying? These are serious problems that need to be addressed urgently. This article describes step by step how to be when you do not know what to do next. So what do you do when you don't know what to do next? First of all, you need to calm down.
All tantrums will not lead to anything good, so they should be stopped. Do not tear and throw around the apartment. We give free rein to relax - you can take a bath, drink a cup of your favorite coffee or tea and, be sure to get enough sleep.
You should not be closed in four walls, it only pumps up even more. We forget about the Internet and social networks and go to nature. Ideally, it would be to get out into the fresh air, at least for a week. If such an opportunity is not provided, we devote the maximum possible time for such a rest. If it is not possible to devote even one day to this, you need to take a walk, at least a couple of hours. You can spend this time with your dog, go rollerblading, take a walk in the park. This will help break away from the daily ruin and everyday problems. To get the most out of this walk, you need to forget about everything and enjoy the beauty of nature. If you do not know what to do when you do not know what to talk about with your husband, then you urgently need
This will bring back common sense, perhaps lead to the solution of some problems.
If the walk did not help, you can try to use the review of problems from the outside. To do this, it is worth putting all your problems on paper, describing the situation, in all details, as it appears, people who are annoying. After completing this action, it is worth reading what was written and, if you are sure that these are the problems that have led to a dead end, without regret, we are changing our lives. We change everything that was written on paper - work, bad acquaintances, we part with fear, pity and anger. Also, it will be useful to forgive everyone on the list, this will give us more strength and confidence.
If there is pity for certain moments or, for everything, in general, then you will have to accept and live on, as it was before, until a dead end comes again.
In any situation, it is necessary to draw your own conclusions in order to avoid its repetition. Therefore, having carefully analyzed what led to such an expiration of circumstances, it is better to write down your conclusions on paper. By ignoring this step, even certain changes in life will not help. This will be a temporary solution to problems and you can easily return to repeating the situation after a short period of time.
We can imagine a situation when a friend came to us for advice, faced with problems identical to us. We again take a notebook and write down everything, even the most ridiculous advice that comes to mind. After the work done, you can once again go out into nature.
We re-read the list and choose the most suitable options that can really help. These points should be formalized in the form of a plan for the near future. It could be a couple of days, weeks, months. The main thing is to believe in the implementation of the plan and the solution of your problems.
Now, after all the work done, it remains to implement everything in practice. It may be more difficult, but do not forget about the work done, because all this was done with a purpose!
The question is concise and, of course, not specific: “What should I do if I don’t know what to do in this situation?”, But on the Internet it is very significant, therefore, there should be an answer to it.
Under the question "What should I do?" different meanings can be implied: from elementary to complex (for example: the search for the meaning of life). Sooner or later, a person finds himself in a situation in which he feels lost, depressed, a feeling of hopelessness arises, and often, a person concludes for himself: "nothing can be changed, this is how life works."
General tips to help solve the problem:
- Calm down as much as possible (as far as possible), extinguish negative feelings in yourself:, etc. There is no need to make important decisions if you are in a depressed or negative state.
Calmness - will minimize negative manifestations, as well as relieve stress.
At the moment when a person “spins” (the energy of chaos, irritability, misunderstanding and discomfort), one must stop for a minute and realize that this is not a comfortable situation, this is nothing more than a positive signal - something needs to be changed in your life.
Any problem − no matter which one - this is an occasion to look back, draw a conclusion and make a new decision.
- Next, a blank sheet of paper and a pen will help. After you have calmed down and extinguished the negative - write all the options (everything that you can think of) for solving this problem. Write out, including the most unrealistic versions.
Then slowly re-read what was written (preferably several times). If anything else comes to mind, add to your list.
Analyze, draw conclusions and cross out those options that can lead to undesirable consequences. You need to think here not with fear or a desire for revenge, but with your head, so as not to become an enemy to yourself. You will not win or win if you follow your pride, rage or resentment, but you will only lose. It is important to find strength in yourself and step over your pride, eradicate resentment and get rid of rage.
- If you decide to consult with someone, then you need to consider the following:
You must be sure that the person you are consulting with:
- wishes you well
- must be knowledgeable about the subject
- his motives must be positive
The decision must be made by you personally. You must be confident and feel that this is your decision, and not imposed by someone.
What should I do if I do not know how to achieve my goal because of my anxiety
Before eradicating anxiety, I would recommend listening to it first. Existential anxiety (a feeling of emotional discomfort when asked about the meaning of existence) gnaws at a person when, somewhere, in the depths of his soul, he realizes that somehow he lives differently. Having understood the meaning of anxiety, a person can meet his true destiny and begin to fulfill it. Just by banishing anxiety, you can miss your true existence.
The worst thing that prevents a person from achieving his goal is fear and doubt.. At the same time, a person releases such energy that slows down the development of events. A person harms himself in this state. As soon as the fear goes away, his desire (thoughts) enters the information field and starts working, everything works out, because it is material.
You need to let go of the situation, not hang over it, forget it for a while, and then after a while everything will come true.
