Severe stress: how to learn to withstand the blows of fate. Do not bend under the blows of fate

I once talked with a girl who had just gone through a breakup with her loved one. Her words stuck in my memory: “I have the feeling that someone has turned off all the colors around, and my life continues in a viscous black-and-gray film, meaningless and dreary. I don’t even know how to live on, everything somehow lost its meaning.”

Alas, our life too often teaches us lessons in which we must show steadfastness and our strong-willed qualities. The departure of a loved one, the loss of a job, troubles and conflicts - usually all this together is called blows of fate. A weak person in such a situation will break, but a strong person will become stronger.

Of course, any person wants to be happy, but life is such a thing that troubles, even those after which you can lose the meaning of life, sometimes happen. And if a similar incident occurred in your destiny, remember the main thing - this is not the end of life. This is not an abyss or a dead end, it is only a crossroads and it is up to you to choose where you will go next.

Human life can be represented as a road: each event is either an obstacle on the way or a turn to another path or a transition to another quality level. Such an analogy is good because at the moment of a particularly difficult life situation, when it seems that everything, life is over, you can look back at your previous path.

Then you will be able to realize that the rest of your life is still ahead, and you have already been able to go through so much on your way and this situation will not be able to stop you. Your main task is not to stop, but to become stronger and choose the right path forward.

The first and most important thing is to calm down and forgive. Forgive the one who offended, left or crossed the road. Remember the truth - only weak personalities remember grievances for years, accumulate them and cherish them, while strong ones forgive, forget and move on. Having forgiven the person who hurt you, you can go on a further journey without a load of negative emotions.

There are many techniques for forgiveness, you can talk to this person, you can even just say out loud what has accumulated in your soul, you can write a letter and not necessarily send it. It depends on you whether you can forgive and get rid of the heavy burden of memories that will further put pressure on you and prevent you from breathing freely.

It's not easy at all, but it's the only way to not suffer about the past and move on easily in life. There is a psychological technique that helps to survive a difficult situation. You need to sit comfortably, relax and imagine that today you are full of strength, decisive and have already been taught by bitter experience. Then imagine a calendar and mentally turn the pages back to the day when you had this difficult event.

And now you, today's person from the future, already strong and taught by life experience, see yourself in the past in that difficult state. Now think about how you can protect yourself in the past, how you can help and what appropriate words to say to yourself in that life situation. This technique is very effective, only it needs to be given not one or two minutes, but not less than half an hour.

There is also a psychological technique that helps not only survive troubles, but also learn to value yourself. It's called Diamond. To do this, you need to sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes and find the center of yourself. Each person realizes himself differently and therefore the center can be in the area of ​​the heart or in the head, the main thing is to mentally find this center and imagine that there is a diamond in it.

Take a look at this stone. He is unique, just like you. This is the most precious stone in the world, it is as priceless as you. This is the most durable stone! And your properties are the same as those of a diamond - you are unique, you are priceless and it is impossible to break you. Perform this exercise daily, and you will gain not only the strength and durability of a diamond, but also self-confidence.

There is also a rather simple and very interesting technique, also associated with the visualization of gems. Imagine a beautiful box filled with magical gems - diamonds, rubies, emeralds.

Each stone is a moment of your life that brought you happiness and warmth. And now you are sorting through them with sadness, pain and longing. Be aware of what you are doing! After all, these are beautiful happy particles of your life, but they begin to fade from your tears and your grief. Stop.

And finally, important, one might even say the most important advice - do not call names, do not scold and don't blame yourself for everything. What happened is already impossible to change, maybe this is for the better. Take this lesson correctly and set off on your further journey through life confidently and easily, believing in your strengths and your future.

You will still have everything if you really want it. There will be new work, new accomplishments, new relationships. It is your thoughts, even in spite of life circumstances, that shape your reality - this is a truth that must not be forgotten.

If you think about past failures and grievances, you will pull them into the future with you. If you imagine success and future victories, then you will attract them to your present. The main thing in this is only your faith and your desire.

The concepts of "blows of fate", "stress" are very firmly established in the human mind. Any of us from time to time experiences pressure, is subjected to physical or emotional stress, experiences stress. There are situations in life when maximum concentration of mental strength is required. What to do and how to learn to withstand the blow of fate, what to do if life is full of congestion? How should you behave during stress? How to develop the ability to take a punch in a stressful situation and get out of it with maximum experience and minimum losses? How not to give up during a difficult test? How to take a hit in life? The answers to these questions and many others can be found in the article.

Blows of fate - what is it?

Our fate is not known to anyone in advance, so it presents us with all sorts of surprises and completely unpredictable events. Some are gifts to us, and some we perceive as punishment.

Many people believe that the wrong behavior of a person, his serious misdeeds, never go unnoticed by Lady Fate, she punishes him for this. But often the "punishments" are excessive and unfair.

A blow of fate can happen at any moment and in any form: death of a loved one, betrayal of a loved one, betrayal of a friend, accident, injury, attack, destruction of a home, fire, natural disaster and many other cataclysms.

The blow can be in the form of circumstances or manifest through people. Its main features are strength and surprise, which disable our defense system. And here the ability to take a hit plays an important role.

The blows of fate have a strong impact on a person, especially when he is not internally ready for them. He experiences severe stress, falls into depression. The risk of losing oneself and breaking down in a person doubles.

Instructions on how to take the blows of fate

In the life of each of us, at certain moments, losses occur, since all people are mortal. It happens that injuries, accidents, disasters and other unpredictable events happen. It sometimes seems impossible to hold the blows of fate ... What to do in such situations? How not to break? How to withstand the blow and all the tests?

Psychologists advise to follow according to a special set of rules, try to follow the points of this instruction:

1. It is necessary to contact a loved one, if there is such a person in life, talk to him, tell him about what happened.
2. If there is no close and dear person, then you need to choose some inanimate object and tell him about your problem.
3. It happens that an oral story does not help, and it’s still hard on the heart, you need to take a white sheet of paper and write down all the thoughts that are in your head. After you have put all your experiences on paper, it must be torn into small pieces and burned.
4. Be sure to cry, this also applies to men, take sedatives, fall asleep.
5. Try not to succumb to sorrowful experiences, calm down, try to live on.
6. Dark gloomy rooms and loneliness should be avoided. Try to do something all the time.
7. Set a goal for yourself, it will help you psychologically recover and return to your usual way of life.

This instruction, of course, is approximate, each person is individual, what suits one is completely unacceptable to another. You should find your own ways to cope with troubles, grief and stress.

Stress

This is a person's reaction to any changes in the world around him, it is expressed in a change in his psychological and physical condition.

Troubles at work, problems in the family, financial troubles, debt - all this can lead to stress. However, pleasant events, such as a wedding, travel, a new job, are also stress, but it gives energy to a person, an incentive to move on, in contrast to negative stress, which affects a person as a destructive destructive force, changing his emotional and physical state. What does the phrase "take a hit" mean? It means to resist negative changes and influences, this is the meaning we have in mind when we say this phrase.

Not everyone is able to correctly assess and calculate the situation? Where one does not know what to do, rushes about, panics, the other acts very calmly and judiciously. Experience plays an important role in behavior, it is he who helps to orientate correctly and develop the right tactics of behavior.

Never give up

Stress has its own phases of action:

• The first is the anxiety response. Any human body resists it. Sometimes inflammatory diseases occur, but then everything goes away, and the person recovers completely.
• The second phase - begins when the body has not been able to cope with stress, it begins to adapt to it. At this stage, a person spends a lot of energy, but nothing happens. This state can be described as "no peace, no war."
• The third phase of stress is the exhaustion of a person. When despondency, apathy, unwillingness to do anything sets in. This stage is the most unpleasant and dangerous for a person.

To cope with stress, there are two methods:

1. Controlling and changing stressful situations. This method is quite useful if you are faced with manageable stressful situations, that is, where you can do something and change. It is necessary to analyze the problem, evaluate it, try to change the situation.
2. A way to control your emotions. If stress is uncontrollable, focus on emotions. For example, if you have to make some difficult decision, and because of this you are stressed, then you should let go of the situation, and then in a more relaxed atmosphere, think about it and make a decision. Thus, it will turn out to use two methods at the same time.

But there are situations when it is difficult to cope with emotions, for example, the betrayal of a loved one. In this case, you can’t close yourself, you need to sincerely forgive the person and try to talk to someone about this problem. You can’t control your emotions, it’s better to throw them out, otherwise it can adversely affect health.

First aid for stress

If you need to cope with stress as soon as possible, you should:

1. To relax.
2. Throw all thoughts out of your head, imagine that you are in your favorite place. Focus on your feelings and completely forget about the problem for a while.

In order to avoid stress, you must:

1. Avoid stressful situations whenever possible.
2. Pay more attention to your favorite things, people.
3. Find yourself a hobby that will distract from problems and bring pleasure.
4. Relax more and enjoy life.
5. Don't deprive yourself of your dreams.
6. Pamper yourself from time to time with desserts, beautiful clothes, travel.
7. Eat properly.

Vitality and what it depends on

The success of each of us depends on how we can take a hit. Can we withstand the difficulties, or have we despaired and are looking for the guilty. Endurance needs to be developed and worked on. For this you need:

1. Set yourself a goal. There must always be an incentive in life, a peak to which there must be a desire to strive.
2. Take action to achieve your goal. For example, there is a dream to buy an apartment, but lying on the couch you cannot realize this dream. Something needs to be done. And always remember one simple truth: when a child learns to walk, he falls many times, but continues to rise and learn. So it is with a dream.
3. Everyone has opportunities, you need to be able to take advantage of your chance. You have to be an open person for people, ideas, events. After all, no one knows for sure where luck awaits him.
4. At the end of each day, analyze it, note what exactly was success today, and plan your actions for tomorrow.

Endurance and the ability to withstand life's turmoil - these are the qualities that you need to cultivate in yourself so as not to bend and break in life.

Instead of a conclusion, or Interesting expressions about how to take a punch, quotes with a similar meaning

The ability to resist the vicissitudes of fate has been of interest to scientific minds, artists and literature since ancient times. Here, for example, are expressions of famous people that are close in meaning to the catchphrase "take a hit":

• The ancient Greek poet Archilochus said that the greatest gift a person has is a persistent soul.
• The Russian science fiction writer has an expression, the essence of which is that in life you need to be able to take a hit, not only when they hit you in the face, but also when they spit in your soul.
• Churchill recommended never to give up, either in a big deal or in a small one.
• The modern French writer Musso Guillaume says that it doesn’t matter at all how hard you were hit, what matters is how you withstood it.
• Wilde Oscar advised never to bend under the weight of grief, what we think of as an ordeal can actually be the greatest blessing.

Are you unsettled by any, even a small nuisance? Are you overreacting to changes at work and at home? Get upset over any trifle? It's time for you to work on resilience!

There are such lucky people who come into the world with an innate ability to group in a moment of stress, quickly respond and make a decision. And then - just as quickly move away from an unpleasant situation, forget that it never happened. As a rule, among innately stress-resistant people, the majority - sanguine. So they got lucky. Phlegmatic usually treat non-standard, but not too stressful situations calmly due to the fact that their reactions are slow. But severe or accumulated stress can drive them into depression.

But who is very prone to stress is melancholy and choleric, however, they react to it differently. Melancholics “withdraw into themselves”, suffer, delve into their inner world and deduce entire theories of their own bad luck due to a broken heel. Cholerics are prone to violent reactions, tears, tantrums, hand-wringing and the like. In a word, choleric and melancholic people are the most stress-resistant personalities.

Just because your personality type is naturally stress resistant doesn't mean you can't develop stress tolerance. After all, this is a skill that is formed unconsciously or consciously.

Is there a life without stress?
Alas, this does not happen. Even if you have an ideal job, harmonious relations with relatives, good income and a full house, this does not mean at all that stress will pass you by. And by the way, this is not as bad as you think, because any emergency and even unpleasant situation forces us to leave our comfort zone and try something new: respond differently to a remark, react differently to a quarrel, find the right words to convince. Don't treat stress as an enemy - it can teach you a lot! Of course, if you first learn how to "take a punch."

We train stress resistance

- Become a pro. According to research, 64% of stress occurs in the workplace. In order not to become their victim, improve your professional skills. The more confident you feel as a specialist, the harder it will be to unsettle you.

- Surround yourself with order. The chaos in the space around you confuses logic and brings chaos to thoughts, and there is already enough of it in a stressful situation. Try to keep order, this will give you stability and a sense of self-confidence.

- Find your comfort zone. Surely you have a favorite activity that improves your mood and calms you: needlework, reading, viewing magazines. “Catch” your physical state when you are doing this business: what position you take, what facial expression you have, posture, how you feel. When stress happens, try to mentally “return” yourself to a state of comfort.

- Maintain discipline. Getting up every day at the same time, exercising, having breakfast, watching a TV series ... This whole routine is good because it gives a feeling of inviolability: tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and a year later you will still be drinking coffee at ten zero zero. Even if bad things happen, it won't change the course of your life.

- Learn relaxation techniques. It can be any technique: breathing exercises, yoga, dance therapy, and so on. When you feel out of sorts, apply this technique and you will be able to calm down.

- Track your emotions. In order to cope with negative emotions, one must learn to understand oneself and one's feelings, to be aware of them. It is enough to fix your emotions several times a day: “Now I feel calm and good. And now I'm worried. And now I'm angry." It is also important to learn how to talk about your feelings out loud.

- Learn concentration. How often do you get distracted while doing something? You should learn to concentrate all your attention on one lesson until it is completed. When stress occurs, this skill will come in handy!

- Improve your communication skills. The ability to find a language with different people and in different circumstances is also an indicator of stress resistance. Think of dealing with difficult colleagues or unpleasant neighbors as a kind of training in the art of communication.

Sudden grief can manifest itself in any form - a breakup with a loved one, betrayal of friends, an accident, an attack by criminals, a natural disaster, the loss of a home, the death and illness of a loved one, a financial crisis, an injury. The main thing is that the blows of fate are always unexpected, no matter how hard you try, you can’t prepare for them.

If you have trouble in your life, it is important to remember that after a dark night, dawn always comes. We must believe that everything bad that happens to us leads to something good. Almost all religions of the world agree with each other that misfortunes and troubles are a request from God to stop and think, are you going in the right direction, are you doing everything right? Suffering changes a person. Many are beginning to realize that the race of life is just vanity. People become more attentive and sensitive to themselves and to others.

Any event, both good and bad, that happens in our lives, we need something for it. Perhaps you should reconsider your attitude towards this. Become more loving, merciful, good-natured, sensitive, sincere. It is not uncommon for people to completely change their behavior and lifestyle for the better after experiencing a great misfortune.

The ability not to curse fate, to endure its blows steadfastly and not to fall into despondency testifies to the stamina of character, the strength of the spirit. This skill is not born, it is brought up in the process of personal development. Just as athletes are taught to take a punch in a fight, so in life you need to learn “not to lose heart” in a critical situation. And remember that every person has as many trials as they can bear.

Accept the world as it is. If a loved one has left, then the lost relationship cannot be returned. If a loved one died, then he will live on in your memory. If you have been fired, then you need to look for a new job. Don't focus on what's gone. Think about what's left.

It is important not to complain about bad luck, but to take active steps, to do things that can change fate for the better. And to believe that if something did not work out today, it will definitely work out tomorrow. Do not despair, strive for your own, showing perseverance.

There is no need to look for the guilty, to shift the responsibility for your suffering to others, to blame yourself.

Develop the ability to start life from scratch after failure, leave the past in the past and live in the present moment.

You need to set yourself some new goals and go to achieve them. Often the desire to achieve the goal is so interesting that there is simply no time to remember the troubles.

Each of us dreams of a happy fate, but life teaches us resilience, and troubles, even those after which the meaning of life is lost, happen. After all, we could not appreciate the happiness that suddenly fell on us without experiencing misfortune. Our life is an interweaving of joyful and sad events. And you need to learn to treat everything that happens with love. After all, our whole life is built from this. And remember that all problems are surmountable. It is necessary to be able to accept a life lesson and move on, easily and confidently, believing in yourself and in your future.