get lost- does not mean at all to move away from the life we are used to. Not at all. Against, a little isolation from the reality around us helps to find our place in this world.
You may feel lost and unable to make sense of your feelings. Small “mental” vacations will help you look at life objectively and understand yourself.
In the journal "Psychology Today" ( "Psychology Today") an interesting article was recently published stating that our brain also needs a rest from time to time.
It would be nice sometimes to put this curious theory into practice.
Its theses are simple: from time to time a person needs to be distracted from the reality around him.
Thanks to this, we will be able to take a fresh look at the world, new perspectives will open before us, we will have new incentives. It also allows us to know ourselves better and understand our own essence.
So, are you ready to take this step?
Getting lost is quite a bold step, thanks to which we are able to feel the joy of returning.
Perhaps there are those who have never experienced such sensations. But is it good?
Sometimes we get lost at the crossroads of life and choose the wrong paths. It happens that on our way we come across real labyrinths, during the passage of which it is not so easy to keep calm and reasonableness.
But often precisely for such unexpected turns happiness, balance, satisfaction, harmony await us.
Don't worry. After all, it is quite normal to get lost and lost in order to find ourselves.
This is a valuable life experience, and you should not be afraid of it. After all, it is the changes that open before us. We become more mature and balanced.
Sometimes the reality surrounding us alienates us from ourselves and we lose our identity.
As a rule, each person clearly imagines his own life goals, principles, values, needs and boundaries of what is permitted.
But sometimes everyday life makes small adjustments to our picture of the world. This happens gradually. Every day we live leaves its mark on us. Like the waves of the ocean, which sharpen the coastal cliffs.
- As a result, it becomes difficult for us to determine original form our views and ideas, lost as a result of this transformation. Our personality and self-image undergo the same changes as sea rocks.
- Our social circle at work, family, hobbies at certain times can put pressure on us. Often people around us directly or indirectly manipulate us, which gradually alienates us from our true selves.
- And here comes the moment when we manage to detect this dissonance. We think about who we were before and what we are now. When this happens, you must dare to face the truth. After all, such a situation, left to chance, can become very dangerous.
Of course, at any given moment in life, we can only make one decision. It's impossible to get everything. In addition, we have certain responsibilities and goals, as well as obligations to other people.
The main priority is inner harmony. We must be well aware of each of our actions, their motives. The most important thing is that every day you live does not leave a bitter residue, but brings a sense of satisfaction.
Get lost, break away from the world and immerse yourself in yourself
Do not forget that people who are forced to endure prolonged stress and nervous tension often cease to be the helmsmen of their lives and give the reins to external circumstances.
At such moments, the following happens to a person:
- The brain is unable to resist, during which the production of cortisol and adrenaline increases. As a result, a person may develop memory impairment, he begins to disconnect from the reality around him.
- Imagine such a situation. You get on the bus to go to work. And suddenly you have a question: “What am I doing here?”
- This state can last from a few minutes to a couple of hours. It's kind of defense mechanism our brain, with which he tries to restore inner harmony and calm down.
- This is a wake-up call that needs to be heeded. Our brains are urging us to pause, slow down, and rest.
But is it worth waiting for such anxiety symptoms? As you know, prevention is always better than cure. There is no need to wait for the memory lapses to appear in order to escape from reality and restore the lost inner balance.
How to escape from reality without harm to health?
You may think that we will advise you to buy a ticket for the first departing flight and escape from the harsh everyday life to a distant tropical country. Not at all. Being distracted from reality does not at all mean “getting away from the world around you”, burning all the bridges behind you.
- For this we need preparation. Our goal is not an escape from reality, but a short rest for subsequent recovery. Therefore, for a happy return, you will need a return ticket.
- If you decide to “get lost”, you need to clearly explain to others the reasons and goals for your departure: “I want to spend the weekendbecause I need to relax and think about some decisions.”
- Some will understand you and some won't. It's not your problem anymore. It is very important to be able to prioritize. Each of us needs time to be alone with ourselves. Very often, due to everyday worries, we forget about our own needs and contact with our "I".
After such a journey to the origins of our self, we return stronger and more confident, ready to once again become the helmsmen of our lives.
We took the opportunity to speak with famous author about his new book, belief in reincarnation and life path which is predetermined from childhood.
I know that you love science fiction, your character's name is Gabriel Wells, very similar to the name of the writer H. G. Wells. It is an accident?
No, not an accident, I wanted to pay tribute to Wells. And in general, I really like this surname, because in English it means "well." The Wells family, the heroes of my novel, seems to me in the form of a well, you can go down deeper and deeper, discover some new sides, but never reach the bottom.
Bernard WerberDo you often think about references to certain works when you write?
Yes, I love giving links. In my books, I often quote three authors: Rabelais, whom I love very much, Philip K. Dick, and Pythagoras. But I quote them not because they are writers, but because they the greatest philosophers and they have very deep thoughts.
Are there any books your readers should read to understand your own writing?
No, no preparation is needed. On the contrary, I try to make it so that any reader, as unprepared as possible, can understand me. One of my youngest readers is only seven years old. I deliberately write in such a way that even a child can understand me, I do not want to be an elite author for the elite. My goal is to become a writer for myself a wide range. And I am quite convinced that it is much more difficult to win the attention of a large readership than to please some small group of people.
The hero of your book has an antagonist brother. Gabriel Wells is a writer and philosopher, while his brother is a scientist who believes only in reason. Which of these types are more interesting to you in real life?
I myself am more like the main character, and therefore it is more interesting for me to communicate with people who are not like me. But rationalism is a belief just like any other. I don't really like people who think they know everything, who are convinced that God does not exist, that nothing happens after death. They live with their confidence, but, in my opinion, these are not the most interesting personalities. The same can be said about those who are sure of the opposite: that there is a God, that after death such and such awaits us. to an honest man it is worth admitting that he does not know what will happen next. He must learn, he must learn, and any hypothesis may turn out to be true.
The idea that there is another life after death allows us to relax and not worry so much at the moment of our departure from this world. And if this hypothesis can make people a little happier, then why should they be deprived of this happiness? When I think about the fact that I have had previous reincarnations and will have more, it calms me. I think that if in this life you can’t do everything absolutely perfect, then you can try again in the next.
You say that you are comforted by the thought of being able to change something in future reincarnations, but judging by your book, we forget what happened in past life. Or is it not?
Consciously we forget, but unconsciously we remember. Therefore, it is very interesting to try to establish a connection with your unconscious. This can be done while sleeping. And it’s also very interesting to ask yourself questions: “Why am I like this? Why do I act this way and not otherwise? I'm sure that when you were a baby, you were already the way you are now. It's like a plant, the whole essence of which lies in the seed. It is something organic, something natural, otherwise we would all be the same. Otherwise, how to explain that there are people who from birth have musical ability. Children can have the same parents, but one has the ability and the other does not. I believe that reincarnation is one possible explanation for why things are the way they are.
It turns out that we can not change anything in ourselves? Only develop?
We always have free choice. Imagine life as a road. The simplest thing is to get in the car and drive along it. You can stop, come back, deviate from the highway and drive along some small path nearby. But before you make any of the possible choices, the main route has already been mapped out. And if you eventually get bored of wandering around in a roundabout way, you can always return to it.
It seems to me that life sends us a huge number of signs to show whether we are on our way or have deviated. I never wanted to be a writer, but I do write. A horse does not necessarily want to win races, but at the same time it rushes, or a bee, it doesn’t really want to produce honey, but at the same time it produces it. And for me, writing books is as natural as writing articles, if that's your passion. When I was a journalist, I noticed that it was difficult for me, but when I started writing, everything somehow formed by itself and became much easier. Therefore, my karma is rather to write fiction, not articles.
You said about signs, what “sign” did life send you to turn to literature?
Very simple. I had a friend who advised me not to waste my time on journalism.
While talking with my colleague, you said that you have so many different stories and heroes that you, conditionally, ask them to line up in a row and tell about themselves. How do you determine which story is important and which can wait?
In fact, at first I just write the first version, in which nothing works, and only then I carefully read the text, where one is not related to the other, and I understand how to build related work. I rewrote the novel "From the Other World" 11 times. That is, I wrote 11 novels of 400 pages to make the one you are holding in your hands. That is, my choice is the result of my mistakes. I look where and what I did wrong and choose Right way. In fact, my novel is reincarnated 11 times.
Do you choose yourself or with the help of an editor?
Now I have a great editor. I started working with her when I was at the fourth stage of the novel, and she told me what worked and what didn’t. She read my book three times. Usually my editors get tired of me. Few people have enough patience, and, in general, I understand them. But as soon as I send the manuscript to the reader, I immediately understand how this book should have been written. And then I make another version, which turns out to be the final one. This is how I work. But when I write, I always know the end, I can't say that I'm flying away somewhere in my fantasies.
But if you remember the story with the novel "Ants", which the editor asked to cut by two-thirds. You once said that you treated this task as a quest. How much should you trust someone else's opinion when working on a work?
Well, after the tenth version of the book, I already think that the publisher is always right. Of course, my publisher consults with me about what to remove, but as a rule, I always agree with her. I'm a doubter. I doubt whether God exists, whether there is reincarnation, I also doubt about my manuscripts. I often ask questions and write books in order to find answers to them.
I want you to remember the words of the famous Italian writer, poet, thinker (he is count) Vittorio Alfieri.
Here it is Rome.
When I was in Rome, I remembered the words of an Italian thinker.
Two hundred years ago he said, "It often takes more courage to live than to die."
Great phrase!
I immediately remember Leo Tolstoy and his phrase: "All thoughts about death are necessary for life."
Look at this picture. Here is young Tolstoy.
And when he became mature:
Here Lev Nikolaevich is wise. Not so easy life he had. Complex family relationships. There was not always an understanding with children, relatives, friends, but he loved life, understood it, appreciated it and was right in condemning suicides.
And in the same row is my rule of life: there are no hopeless situations, except for death. This must be remembered and guided by this.
Difficult, difficult, difficult. Everything is falling out of hand.
Health is disgusting.
No money.
Friends left a long time ago (or you haven't found them yet).
Love didn't work.
Didn't find any hobbies.
Call not found.
People annoy you.
And you annoy people.
You don't like the job. And no one at work likes you.
I want to scream, scream and run away somewhere.
Where?
Nowhere!
You can't run away from yourself.
Even if you try to drown out pain, hatred, sadness, bitterness with alcohol, you still can’t run away from yourself: you wake up, you sober up, and it’s even worse for you.
This is where it is important to look at the life around you and say: "There are no hopeless situations, except for death."
I have written about this before and now I will remind you about it. The man was put in jail for a long time. But he did not give up and continued to work. And he did a lot.
In prison.
In custody.
Deprived of freedom.
Dreaming of freedom.
You are free.
There is no money - you can get it.
Poor health - try to improve it.
There is no love - start looking for signs of attention yourself.
No idea - try to think about what worries you the most, what you would like to change, understand: the idea will appear.
If you pass SOLO on the keyboard, I guarantee that you will seriously think about what to do and how to improve your life.
And if you have the strength to pass "Learning to Speak in Public" (we are now significantly reworking this course), then you will radically change your fate.
You just have to want. However, I'm lying. Wanting is not enough. More needs to be done.
Here are some examples.
Do not be lazy, read the list of those whom the whole world knows. These people of different times and peoples, having been imprisoned for a number of reasons, did not lose heart. On the contrary, they seem to have a second wind. They acted on the principle of "There are no hopeless situations."
Here is just a small part of this list.
Miguel Cervantes wrote Don Quixote.
Walter Reilly came up with a way to desalinate sea water.
Johann Friedrich Betger invented a method for making porcelain, today known as Saxon porcelain.
Leonty Shamshurenkov in 1752 showed to the guards the project of a self-propelled carriage with a muscular drive - a bicycle.
Charles Goodyear invented a method for refining rubber products in 1830.
Nikolai Kibalchich, sentenced to death for preparing an assassination attempt on the tsar, created a project aircraft on jet thrust.
Johann Kammerer in prison cell, where he was thrown for participating in student unrest, invented matches.
Daniil Andreev wrote the book "Rose of the World".
Pavel Oshchepkov, convicted in the Tukhachevsky case, invented the radar.
Andrei Tupolev, accused of espionage, created the Tu-4 bomber project.
And Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky!
Writer Alexander Isaevich Solzhenitsyn, Natalia Ilyinichna Sats (founder of the Children's musical theater in Moscow, she spent about fifteen years in prison), Georgy Stepanovich Zhzhenov (I have repeatedly written about him on our website), Innokenty Mikhailovich Smoktunovsky, Sergei Pavlovich Korolev (father of Soviet cosmonautics)
I can list a hundred pages. There will be doctors, scientists, writers
They created everything! In custody.
Being exiled to Kolyma or to other places. They created. Despite everything, in spite of everything! And this saved their lives.
My advice: a similar state will arise in you remember Cervantes, Tupolev, Korolev, Sats, Zhzhenov, Smoktunovsky, Solzhenitsyn Imagine these people. Here they are in the chamber. For several people or alone. After the obligatory rise at six in the morning, after a meager breakfast, they sit down at the iron prison table and begin to work. Or, after a short walk in the inner prison courtyard, they return to the cell and work again.
And what was it like for Alexander Isaevich to compose his works after working at a camp construction site, in a sharashka? How many hours did he work?
You can often hear: “Where can I get the time and energy for everything ?!”
And where did those people I just talked about take it from?
Remember the saying: “Limited means give rise to search”? Say this phrase when something doesn't work out for you.
There will be time, visit our website.
There will be a desire to diversify your life, try to take part in car racing on our website.
I wish you a great weekend!
I congratulate Muscovites on City Day.
I would be grateful if you tell all those with whom you meet during the weekend about our site.
And remember: in your soul you must be open to everything new, interesting, unusual, unexpected ... yes, yes, you must be ready for good change In my life!
