Each of us has days when, it seems, everything is fine and nothing portends trouble, and then overnight - once! – and everything becomes bad and gloomy. Outwardly, everything is the same, but inside the volcano begins to rage, and you realize that you are at the very bottom of your soul.
What was the reason for this? Any remark? Smell? Sound? It is difficult to determine what exactly made it enter the peak, but there is only one thing - peace of mind is violated. Something very small sent you into rage, anger, despair or resentment. And so fast that you yourself can not realize how and why you got here.
How not to get into such situations? How to find peace of mind? Is it possible to make sure that the body and soul are always in harmony, and there are no breakdowns? Can. You can become a whole person, and then no small injections and even big blows of fate will unbalance you.
First lesson
If you constantly have cases when there is a “last straw” - and this can be runaway milk, and a discharged phone, and a broken heel, then there are those things that, in principle, are not even worth discussing, but they plunged you into the abyss of pain, then look at your childhood. Most likely, it all started there. Maybe you were ignored or insulted. Maybe you were treated contemptuously or, conversely, wanted too much. Childhood traumas are forgotten by consciousness, but the subconscious mind remembers them, and they, like shrapnel, are looking for a way out. And very often it happens in this way.
We all have these holes. For some, they are small, they can be easily bypassed, for others - just an American canyon left by the environment - relatives, acquaintances, teachers, friends, neighbors.
Serious reasons very rarely throw us into such pits. You feel them and therefore you prepare. Or dodge. Only little things can push into such a spiritual hole. Psychotherapists advise to get yourself a Personal Salvation Card to deal with such holes. What it means: you draw up an account card for yourself, in which you indicate all the evidence that you are an independent, adult, self-sufficient person. Write in it your age, education, all your regalia, including school commendations, academic degrees, that you know how to drive a car, have children, vote, and all that other stuff that a full-fledged adult has the right to do. When you find yourself on the edge of a mental hole, take out this card and read it. Fix yourself in an adult state, realize that childhood has already passed. This will give you some support.
On the back, write the addresses and phone numbers of those people who are ready to lend you a helping hand at any moment. This is your Personal Rescue Service. Write here only those who really love you for who you are. Those who are not afraid of your inner and dark and will do everything possible to pull you out into the light.
Lesson two
Never compare your life with how other people live! You even have no idea how they live, and draw conclusions only on the basis of external factors that they show you. You are trying to compare the incomparable - what you have inside with what they have outside. Believe me, you just think that others live easier and easier.
Don't want someone else's life, live your own. So it will be calmer.
You came into this world this way, not another. And the Universe wants you to be yourself, and not try to live someone else's life. Yes, life kicks us like a soccer ball in the World Cup, try to find your charm in it - enjoy the sharp turns, descents and bumps. Enjoy this journey. It is only your journey – your life.
Lesson three
Our life is very short. And it depends only on you whether to deal with it or deal with death. If you are always in a state of mental confusion and at the same time do nothing to get rid of this oppressive feeling - you do not live, you are busy with your death.
Life very often leads us to the fork "Life - death", and it depends on us which way to go.
If you find yourself in a hole, then get out of it as quickly as possible before it turns into a grave.
Lesson Four
We live very little in the present. Most live in the past, a small percentage live in the future, and those who enjoy the present moment can be counted on the fingers. You can endure everything that life has prepared for you if you do not look into the future and constantly scroll through the past in your thoughts. An important rule in working on how to find peace of mind is to always remember that:
There is no bad life. There are bad moments.
And these moments need to be experienced and sent to the past. And never remember again.
This is how you get rid of deadly diseases. Those who have won the fight against cancer say, “I just lived through today and never looked at the calendar. My task was one - to live today. And I did it."
This approach applies to any situation. Just live NOW. André Dubu put it very well:
“Despair arises because of our imagination, which lies that the future exists, and insistently “predicts” millions of moments, thousands of days. It empties you and you can no longer live in the present moment.”
Don't waste your time on fear of the future and don't regret the past. Live today.
Lesson five
This is perhaps the most fun lesson, which is not at all difficult to complete. We need to go back a little ... to childhood.
Inside, each of us remains a child. We try to look like adults and do it successfully, until someone or something clicks on the “pet callus” and we instantly turn into a frightened offended kid.
Remove bad childhood memories - make a second childhood for yourself, which will be much happier than the first.
Remember what you wanted as a child, but you didn’t get it. And give it to yourself right now.
Would you like to have little pink booties? Go and buy. Have you dreamed of a designer car? Go to the store immediately. You wanted to, but were afraid to climb a tree? Who's stopping you from doing it right now?
Here are some more ideas to help you find peace of mind:
- Go to the planetarium and make a wish on a shooting star;
- Paint the wallpaper in the bedroom;
- Watch cartoons all day long;
- Pick a bouquet of dandelions;
- Ride on the swings;
- Walk in the rain without an umbrella;
- Ride your bike through the puddles;
- Have a picnic right on the living room floor;
- Build a fortress out of tables, stools, sheets and blankets;
- Draw with chalk on the pavement;
- Type in glasses of water and try to play some melody on them;
- Have a pillow fight
- Jump on the bed until you get tired and fall asleep.
What to do is your choice. This list can be supplemented and supplemented. Come up with your own, go back to childhood. Remember that it is never too late to make yourself a happy childhood, which depends only on you.
You can talk about how to find peace of mind again and again. But even these five lessons, if you begin to implement them in your life, will add peace and inner harmony to you. Try it. Choose a fulfilling life, not a dark hole, and you will find the much-desired peace of mind. Happiness to you!
The true secret to achieving peace of mind is that it is not determined by external circumstances, but by your choice. Choice of perspective on situations and way of thinking.
1. live in the present.
The past cannot be brought back, and the future depends on what you think and do at the moment. So pay attention to the present, focus on doing the best you can in everything you do, and just live. Don't let life pass you by because you live in the past or the future.
2. meditate.
Meditation teaches you mental and physical discipline as well as emotional self-control. It's easy and enjoyable, and it's one of the most powerful self-development tools you can use right now!
3. express gratitude.
Express gratitude for everything "Good" and everything "bad", for everything that you experience, learn and adopt. Express gratitude for everything that awaits you in the future. Allow yourself to be enveloped in the warmth and light of gratitude.
4. let go of your usual view of things, look at the world from a different angle. Your point of view is not "The Law", but only one of many points of view. Your way of looking at things can cause you stress. Look at the world with an unrestricted view.
5. know that "this too shall pass."
Change is part of life. Be calm and patient - let everything happen naturally and organically. Develop the courage that allows you to focus on the desired results, not the problem.
6. simplify your life.
Simplicity gives inner peace - due to the fact that you correctly direct your energy. Get rid of everything you don't need, including connections and friendships that don't do you any good. Focus on what's important to you. Do not overload yourself with an excessive amount of things, tasks and information. Leave one or two goals that are most dear to you.
7. smile.
Smiling can open doors, turn "no" into "yes" and instantly change the mood (both yours and those around you. Smile at yourself in the mirror. Smile at family members, employees, everyone who catches your eye. A smile radiates the energy of love - a what you send is what you receive.It is impossible to smile sincerely and at the same time feel anger, sadness, fear or envy.Smiling, you can only feel happiness and peace.
8. bring the work you have started to its logical end.
Close the circle. Unfinished business (unforgiveness, unspoken words, unfinished projects and tasks) is a heavy burden for your consciousness, whether you feel it or not. Each unfinished business takes energy from the present.
9. be true to yourself.
Love yourself. Make your dreams come true and express yourself. Find your purpose and fulfill it.
10. don't worry.
How much time do you spend worrying about what "could happen"? And which of these really happened (and ruined your life? Little, if not nothing at all... right? Focus on what you want, not what you don't want.
11. take care of your health.
Take care of your body: exercise, play sports, eat right and get enough sleep. Add energy to yourself with daily exercises and monitor your well-being.
12. morning is wiser than evening.
Sometimes, when you are overwhelmed with problems, it is not possible to fall asleep. First of all, do your best to physically fix the problem. Only in the event that nothing can be done, turn to the energy solution of the problem. Visualize the ideal state of affairs (in which the given problem does not exist) until the problem goes away on its own or until a solution comes to you.
13. Adhere to the principles of Sufism in your speech.
This ancient tradition dictates that you should only say something if: 1) it's true, 2) it's necessary, and 3 it's kind. Attention! Only if something you want to say doesn't meet these criteria, don't say it.
14. Use the off button.
Avoid information and sensory overload. Turn off the TV, smartphone, tablet, laptop, computer, mp3 player (unless you listen to audio recordings for meditation or relaxation. Learn to simply "Be", not necessarily "doing" anything.
15. Don't do everything at the same time.
Do one thing and do it well. Take a holistic approach in everything and do your best.
16. start with the most difficult.
Don't put things off until later. A large amount of mental and emotional energy is wasted out of fear of doing things we don't want to do - tedious, unpleasant, difficult or intimidating. Deal with them - only properly, in the best possible way. And then move on to simple things.
17. keep balance.
Promote success and inner peace by maintaining balance in your life.
18. Cross money off your priority list. Strive to be a person who is wealthy in terms of relationships, not material goods.
19. you go quieter - you will continue.
Enjoy this journey called "Life". Everything will happen when the time comes. Pay attention to every moment of life and appreciate it. Where to hurry? As soon as you reach the goal, new tasks and problems will certainly appear.
20. Use your imagination. Building the life of your dreams starts in the imagination. It is there that you take the canvas and paints and paint the most desirable life!
In this hectic life, we often simply lack peace. Someone is just very impressionable and is nervous all the time, someone is overcome by problems and difficulties, bad thoughts.
Stop, take a breath, look around, it's time to become aware in this life race.
I dare to give you some tips on how to find peace in the soul, they are all quite simple and easy to follow.
1. Give - receive!
If any difficulties have appeared in your life and it seems to you that the whole world is against you, do not cry and do not suffer. Find another person who needs help and do everything to solve his problems.
2. Do not demand and learn to forgive!
Do not get angry, forget about all your claims, try not to get into quarrels and disputes.
3. Do not get upset over trifles!
Life is largely determined by the internal state of a person. If his soul is dark and empty, then it will be sad, if it is good and clear, then it will be bright and full of perspectives.
4. Look at life differently!
Don't snap back, don't get defensive, don't turn into modern "zombies" or "robots" who think only about how bad their life is. Remember that all your thoughts are material. Think only good things, and this will certainly affect your mood and your reality.
5. Don't make yourself a victim!
Finally, free yourself from the illusion that you are driven into a corner by some unfavorable circumstances or the aggression of others. Your life is in your hands!
6. Don't judge!
For at least a day or two, do not criticize anyone.
7. Live in the present!
Rejoice in what is happening to you right now. Are you sitting at the computer? Great! Would you like tea? Wonderful! Pour and drink. Don't project your negative thoughts into the future.
8. Stop playing and pretending!
There is no need to deceive anyone. Cry when you feel like crying and laugh when you're really laughing. Finally, take off your mask and show the rest of the person you really are.
9. Do what you want, not others
Stop acting on someone else's orders, listen to yourself and understand what you really want.
10. Know and love yourself!
Communicate alone with yourself, look for the motives of your actions and desires. Don't judge or criticize yourself. After all, you are the person who is, and that's wonderful.
11. Exercise!
- Inhale, count to 4 and exhale slowly.
- Write down your own thoughts and 3 best life events on paper.
- Sit on the porch or on a bench and just relax, contemplate and look for positive and beautiful moments in the space around you.
- Imagine yourself floating above the ground in a transparent protective bubble.
- Talk to your inner self.
- Get a head massage.
Even these simple exercises will help you take your mind off problems, calm down and think positively.
12. Meditate!
Solitude and silence, contemplation of nature is one of the best ways to find peace of mind and harmony, use it.
13. Don't let bad thoughts "come"!
Get rid of anything that can upset you. Use the substitution principle. Does a bad thought come? Urgently find something positive that will drive out your bad thoughts. Fill the space around you with joy and positivity.
14. Listen to soothing music!
It will help you relax and slow down your thoughts.
15. Look at the fire of candles or a fireplace!
It gives an inner smile and the energy of magical warmth, simply mesmerizing.
In addition to all of the above, you can listen to birds singing and the sounds of rain, smell fresh flowers, contemplate the starry sky and falling snow, relax, do yoga, take a bath with incense, share smiles and love.
Remember that the great Samurai always won thanks to their inner peace and the ability to see beauty in their surroundings. According to them, only those who are looking for it in panic and running around will not be able to find a way out of the labyrinth. The one who is internally calm will always see from a height both the labyrinth itself and the way out of it.
Happiness to you and peace of mind!
With love to you, In search of yourself.
In our time, people live very restlessly, which is due to various negative realities of a political, economic and social nature. Added to this is a powerful stream of negative information that falls on people from television screens, from Internet news sites and newspaper pages.
Modern medicine is often unable to relieve stress. She is not able to cope with mental and physical disorders, various diseases that are caused by mental imbalance due to negative emotions, anxiety, anxiety, fear, despair, etc. 
Such emotions have a destructive effect on the human body at the cellular level, deplete its vitality, and lead to premature aging.
Insomnia and loss of strength, hypertension and diabetes, heart and stomach diseases, oncological diseases - this is not a complete list of those serious ailments, the main cause of which can be stressful conditions of the body resulting from such harmful emotions.
Plato once said: “The biggest mistake of doctors is that they try to cure a person's body without trying to cure his soul; however, the soul and the body are one and cannot be treated separately!”
Centuries have passed, even millennia, but this saying of the great philosopher of antiquity remains true today. In modern living conditions, the problem of psychological support for people, protecting their psyche from negative emotions has become extremely relevant.
How to achieve inner harmony and peace of mind
- Recognize your NOT ideality and the right to make mistakes. Excessive ambition and self-demanding not only lead to mental balance, but also make a person be in constant stress. Take the mistakes you make as a life lesson and an opportunity to gain valuable experience.
- Live here and now. This will help get rid of fictional fears associated with the future. Often a person worries about what might happen and forgets that it may or may NOT happen. Focus your attention on the present, and solve problems as they arise.
- Learn to say NO. Stop shifting other people's problems onto yourself, and your life will become much easier and more harmonious.
- Build internal boundaries. The loss of your peace of mind may be due to worries about the other person, or taking on their responsibilities. Do not let others impose the rules of the game on you, and let's clearly understand the boundaries of what is permitted in communication with you.
- Don't keep all your experiences to yourself. A great psychological technique to get rid of the loss of calmness is to say out loud what is bothering you. By expressing your feelings in words, you will come to the conclusion that everything is not as bad as you thought. Do not be alone with your feelings and problems. Share them with a loved one who will understand and help.
- Give vent to your emotions regularly. Do not keep everything that has accumulated. Throw out the negative, and you will feel much better. Find out the 5 best ways to deal with stress and use them.
- Learn to forgive and forget. It happens that this is not as easy to do as it seems at first glance. If you are unable to cope with resentment on your own, seek the help of a psychologist.
- Focus on the end result, and perceive temporary difficulties as stepping stones on the way to achieving your goal.
And whatever happens to you, don't take anything to heart. Little in the world is important for a long time.
Erich Maria Remarque "Arc de Triomphe" ---
When you get caught in the rain, you can learn a useful lesson from this. If it starts raining unexpectedly, you don't want to get wet, so you run down the street to your house. But when you get home, you notice that you are still wet. If you decide from the very beginning not to quicken your pace, you will get wet, but you will not fuss. The same should be done in other similar circumstances.
Yamamoto Tsunetomo - Hagakure. Samurai book
Tomorrow will be what it should be
and there will be nothing that should not be -
don't fuss.
If there is no peace within us, it is useless to look for it outside.
Unburdened by worries -
enjoys life.
Gaining is not happy
losing does not grieve, because he knows
that fate is not permanent.
When we're not bound by things
serenity is fully known.
If the body does not rest from tension,
it wears out.
If the spirit is always in worries,
he fades.
Chuang Tzu ---
If you throw a stick to a dog, he will look at this stick. And if you throw a stick to a lion, then he will, without looking up, look at the thrower. This is a formal phrase that was said during disputes in ancient China, if the interlocutor began to cling to words and stopped seeing the main thing.
When I breathe in, I calm my body and mind.
As I exhale, I smile.
Being in the present moment, I know that this moment is amazing!
Allow yourself to breathe deeply and do not drive yourself into a framework.
Strength belongs to those who believe in their strength.
Develop the habit of monitoring your mental-emotional state through self-observation. It is good to regularly ask yourself: "Am I calm at the moment?" is a question that is useful to ask yourself regularly. You can also ask: "What is going on inside me at the moment?"
Eckhart Tolle
Freedom is freedom from worry. Realizing that you cannot influence the results, do not pay attention to your desires and fears. Let them come and go. Do not feed them with interest and attention. In reality, things are done with you, not you.
Nisargadatta Maharaj
The calmer and more balanced a person is, the more powerful his potential and the greater his success in good and worthy deeds. Equanimity of mind is one of the greatest treasures of wisdom.
1. Do not interfere in other people's problems
Many women create a lot of problems for themselves when they interfere in other people's affairs. At such moments, they are convinced that they are doing the right thing, trying to help and advise. Often they can criticize and try to guide others on the right path. But such communion is a denial of individuality, that is, of God. After all, he created each of us unique. It must be remembered that all people act as their divine essence tells them. Don't worry about others - love yourself and take care of yourself!
2. You need to be able to forget and forgive
The most effective way to achieve a woman's peace of mind is the ability to forget insults and forgive them. Often women carry negative feelings inside themselves towards people who once offended them. Constant dissatisfaction only fuels such resentment, which leads to a repetition of people's bad attitudes. You need to believe in the justice of God, allowing him to judge the actions of people who have hurt you. Don't waste your life on trifles. Learn to forgive and look only forward!
3. Don't Seek Social Acceptance
There is no need to show your selfishness in everything, pursuing only personal gain. There is no one perfect in this world. Don't expect recognition from others. Better believe in yourself. Someone else's recognition and encouragement does not last long. Always remember sincerity and morality when you carry out your duties. Everything else is the will of God.
4. Changing the world, start with yourself
Do not try to change the world around you alone. Nobody has been able to do this yet. Changes need to start with yourself, with self-knowledge and self-development. In this case, an unfriendly environment will become harmonious and pleasant for you.
5. You have to put up with what you can't change.
The best way to turn weaknesses into strengths is acceptance. A woman every day faces irritations, inconveniences and negative circumstances that are beyond her control. It is necessary to learn to accept such manifestations in your address. If God willed it so, then it must be so. Divine logic is not subject to our understanding. You need to believe in it and become stronger and more tolerant.
6. Practice Meditation Regularly
Meditation is the best way to free the mind from thoughts. It gives the highest state of peace of mind. Daily meditation for 30 minutes allows you to keep calm throughout the rest of the day. This increases efficiency and allows you to fully enjoy life.
Major troublemakers
1) Take a deep breath for one-two-three-four, hold your breath for the same period, then exhale just as smoothly.
2) Take a pen and write down your thoughts on paper.
3) Recognize that life is hard.
4) Write down your three most successful events in life.
5) Tell a friend or loved one what he or she means to you.
6) Sit on the porch and do nothing. Promise yourself to do it more often.
7) Give yourself permission to just mess around for a while.
8) Look at the clouds for a few minutes.
9) Fly over your life in your imagination.
10) Unfocus your eyes and just notice in your peripheral vision everything that is happening around you for a few minutes.
11) Give some coins to charity.
12) Imagine that you are inside a transparent protective bubble that protects you.
13) Put your hand on your heart and feel how it beats. This is cool.
14) Promise yourself that no matter what, you will keep a positive attitude for the rest of the day.
15) Be grateful that you don't always get what you want.
Do not worry about trifles or things that are ordinary and inevitable.
What is Tranquility
- Calmness is a state of mind in which there are no internal conflicts and contradictions, and external objects are perceived equally balanced.
- Calmness is the ability to maintain clarity of mind and sobriety of mind under any external circumstances.
- Calmness is an expression of sincere trust in life and the world around.
- Calmness is the self-control and strength of a person's character, they help to survive in a non-standard situation and succeed under ordinary circumstances.
- Calmness is the ability to act rationally in any situation, taking into account only logical conclusions, and not an emotional outburst.
How to find and maintain calmness, stop being nervous and worried.
Context: Calm down! Only calmness! It must be preserved in any situation. Another issue is that it doesn't work for everyone. But, thanks to the knowledge of how to remain calm, it is easier to find the right solution, a way out of any situation, and reduce the number of mistakes.
An excited state is one of the most important barriers to a rational decision of affairs. So not for long to lose confidence, strength, to develop various fears and complexes. Everyone knows the fact that calm people attract others. Especially those who calmly, calmly and rationally solve various problem situations, causing admiration and respect of others.
Problem: Be able to restrain yourself under any circumstances. As people say: "Keep yourself in hand ..." Try to be in a state of peace of mind.
Solution: How to find peace of mind after a nervous breakdown. It is even more difficult to avoid a violent manifestation of emotions while internally you are not so calm. In order for a calm state to become your usual, normal state, you need to train. The emotion of calmness itself should automatically turn on in time. This becomes possible if you devote enough time to work on yourself.
How to reach mental balance and calmness
- Quiet place. To get started, follow the link to QUIET PLACE. This will instantly help you relax. Now just remember it every time you want to calm down.
- Faith. A believer is always sure that everything in life - both bad and good - makes sense, and any adversity is a good lesson and an opportunity to learn from your mistakes. Thus, faith gives a person a deep sense of peace.
- Psychological trainings. Inner calmness training can help a person overcome self-doubt and get rid of fears; and as a result, cultivate calmness in yourself.
- Self improvement. The basis of calmness is self-confidence; eliminating complexes and tightness, cultivating self-respect, a person approaches a state of calm.
- Education. Understanding is necessary for peace of mind - in order to understand the nature of things and their interconnection, a person needs education.
Similar traits: restraint, composure
Golden mean: fussiness, panicking, emotional lability, hysteria - a complete lack of inner peace. Indifference, indifference - excessive calmness based on selfishness
In the life of every person there are moments when it is necessary to relax, find peace in the soul, put thoughts in order. And then a person wonders how to find peace of mind? The answer is very simple and we will cover it in our article. Important decisions should not be made hastily. Peace of mind has a beneficial effect on human health in general.
Benefits in a state of calm
This is the state of mind in which there are no internal contradictions and conflicts, and the perception of external objects around you is equally balanced.
Thanks to calmness, a person is able to:
How does peace manifest itself in everyday life?
Discussions. A calm person is able to defend his thoughts and position without hurrying, without getting lost and without getting excited.
Situations of a household type. A calm person is able to drown out an incipient quarrel between relatives, relatives or friends.
Situations are extreme. In the most difficult situations, such qualities of a calm person as rationality of actions and clarity of mind increase the chances of salvation.
scientific experiments. After a series of failures, only a calm person (scientist) will come to the intended goal, being sure that he is right.
Family upbringing. Only a family in which there are no quarrels and loud screams can raise a calm child.
Diplomacy. For a diplomatic person, calmness helps to perform rational actions and restrain their emotions.
So, let's conclude what is peace:
- This is the ability to maintain sobriety of mind and clarity of mind in any life situations;
- This is the ability to act rationally in spite of one's emotions;
- This is the strength of character and self-control of a person, which will help in any situation to achieve the desired result and success;
- This is a complete power of attorney to the surrounding world and life;
- This is friendliness to people and goodwill to the world around.
How to practice peace of mind
In practice, many adhere to the following set of exercises necessary to achieve peace of mind:
- You need to sit on a chair and completely relax all parts of the body;
- Take a few minutes to create pleasant memories in your life;
- Slowly and calmly repeat the words with which you associate peace and harmony of the soul;
- Let your breath bring you into a state of complete calmness.
What is mental balance and how to achieve it
Peace of mind, according to many people, is a utopia. But for the majority, it is quite normal to receive both positive and negative emotions. Of course, positive emotions should dominate. And in order to experience less negativity, you need to be aware and understand your goals and desires, while not paying attention to the opinions of the people around you. Those people who have learned this live in harmony with the soul and mind, and their actions and actions do not contradict what they said.
To overcome negative emotions, you should adhere to the following rules in life:
Reasons why you can lose your peace of mind
In fact, there are many reasons in the world due to which you can lose peace of mind and balance. But let's highlight the most important ones:
- Fear. The fear of some event that should happen in the future often disturbs us and our peace of mind. All these events that are not connected with the present moment disturb us in advance, we suffer and worry about them. And this happens until this event occurs and we see the result.
- Guilt in front of any person. Guilt, at its core, is an inner voice that reproaches us from the inside because we didn’t do something or just offended someone. The feeling that we experience is very burdensome to our thoughts. The most unpleasant thing in such situations is that we do not know how to atone for our sin and seem to be in a state of expectation of some kind of miracle.
- The burden of circumstances. In this concept lies the fact that we undertook to do some business, but subsequently we cannot do it due to some circumstances. Having made a promise, we simply cannot keep it.
- . Very often a person loses his calmness due to the fact that someone offended him. Injured self-esteem constantly reminds us of this factor and does not allow us to calm down on our own for quite a long time.
- Aggression and anger. These factors also have a depressing effect on the balance of the soul.
How to find peace of mind in the above circumstances.
- Very often we are taken away from reality by such factors as resentment, guilt or fear. We constantly worry about those situations that should be or have already been, but you just need to learn to live in the present moment and be content with what you have in the present.
- Everyone makes mistakes, but not everyone perceives it adequately. Having made a mistake, you need to learn admit your guilt and deal with it appropriately and not torment yourself because of this for a long time.
- Learn to say "no" immediately if you realize that you cannot do what you have been asked to do. By refusing right away, you will not give a person hope and will not be tormented by the fact that you cannot fulfill your promise.
- Learn to forgive an offense immediately, and do not wait for the moment when the offender asks you for forgiveness. This may not happen at all, and your peace of mind will be lost for a long time.
- Everyone experiences negative emotions. But you should be able to release them in time. Just do not show your anger and irritation in public. This can also lead to negative consequences and you will spoil the peace of mind not only for yourself, but also for the people around you.
There was a time when I could not sleep for hours. An accidental incident, an unfortunate event, a conversation that did not (as I would like) ended in a way that unsettled me for a long time. Obsession with thoughts and constant digestion of what was, reliably sucked my attention and deprived me of vital energy. The next morning I felt not cheerful and well-rested, but mortally tired and overwhelmed.
I realized that I was simply living in a negative “emotional cocoon” into which, to be completely honest, I had immersed myself. In the end, no one forced me to experience unpleasant and difficult experiences. I did it myself. Let it be unconscious.
So I started looking for a way out.
A static system is the most vulnerable
The main discovery lay on the surface.
We are not so much slaves of our own addictions and habits as slaves of stability. The older we get, the less we want something to really change in life. Especially not the way we want it to change. We crave stability and peace. Firmness and immutability. The inviolability of the established order of life. To always be constantly good, blessed and curly.
But that doesn't happen.
The world around us does not exist according to the laws that we invent for it. The world around us exists according to the laws of dialectics. And dialectics provides for the constancy and immutability of only one thing - conflicts and contradictions.
An attempt to escape from conflicts is an attempt to escape from reality or escapism. Reality will still impose them on you, but not on yours, but on your field. I learned the hard way what it is to be silent when you need to speak, what it is to push away from problems when you need to solve them, what it is to sit and blink your eyes when you need to act. As a result, sooner or later I lost.
Then I realized that an attempt to ignore the world around you, being in your illusions, does not lead to peace of mind, but, on the contrary, gives rise to a bunch of situations that lead to discomfort.
I had a friend whose constant dream was to get everyone behind him. But for some reason, it always turned out that someone cared about him anyway. Miracles and more.
State of dynamic balance
One of my teachers of life was a children's toy "Roly-Vstanka". She showed me that there is such a state in which no matter how life beats you, no matter how it pushes you, you will always return to the position that you occupy. In other words, you always keep the inner balance, despite the ongoing changes and external influences.
This state is called dynamic equilibrium.
In practice, this means that nothing, no external event or circumstance is able to unsettle you and knock you off your intended goal. On the contrary, you turn any troubles to your advantage. Have you been severely criticized? Instead of becoming discouraged, you use the facts you have learned to work intensively on yourself and reach a new level. Got fired? You do not give up and do not complain about fate, but remember your forgotten talents and create a profitable business on them.
But all this is simply a consequence of the fact that you adequately perceive reality and react flexibly to it. There are no ineffective rules and limiting frames in your head, but there is a holistic perception of the world and the ability to see what is usually hidden from the eyes of other people.
Development strategy
The path to finding inner peace and peace of mind, that is, the state of dynamic balance, is the path of practice. It's constantly increasing degree of personal maturity. And this is exactly what the vast majority of people involved in "self-development" strive to avoid like fire. Because it’s very cool and fun to do something pleasant, comfortable and interesting (for example, meditation or reading books) and think that you are “developing”.
And it is very unpleasant to look deep into yourself and realize that you and only you are the only reason for the events taking place in your life - in business, in relationships, in the prevailing circumstances. Realizing this is sometimes very painful and unpleasant. It is so unpleasant that the cunning and dodgy mind begins to invent various "serious and valid" reasons in order not to do real work on oneself. To just not see the true state of things.
The husband left the woman. Went to another. He left because he was walking and because he got bored. These reasons are not hidden. They were on the surface. It was enough to take a closer look, to compare some facts and signs to see them. And when you see it, take appropriate action. But what happened, happened. And she can correct/improve the situation only by realizing the processes by virtue of which she ended up in it.
Instead, a woman runs to fortune-tellers, sorceresses, attends women's trainings, “cleanses karma” and does other easy, pleasant and interesting things. The husband even returns. For a while. But then he gets bored again, and he again goes into the night in search of adventure. And this may continue for a long time.
Real personal growth cannot be replaced by simulation. No way.
uproot
I stubbornly searched for the root of anxiety, the source of all and sundry worries, anxieties and worries. And he couldn't find it. Until I realized that my current personality (and its overseer) didn't really want to look for it. For this root is a frank, impudent and shameless lie to oneself. Believe me, deceiving yourself by creating illusions and simulacra is one of the favorite activities of our limited mind.
Can you stop lying to yourself?
But then you will have to face in full the amount of truth about yourself, about people, about life that you did not want, could not and did not want to see. And after that, you will no longer be able to live as you used to before. This is a one way ticket. The choice is serious and not everyone is ready to make it. This is the destiny of truly strong people. Or those who want to be.
After that, you will have a completely different life. Outwardly, nothing will change. At least right away. But your perception will become as pure as you want it to be. You will see the world in a completely different way, completely different from what you see it now. Ready to embark on this exciting and challenging journey? Start by sending requests for a free consultation.
I'm sure you deserve a better life! Calm, happy and harmonious.
