Human nature sometimes manifests itself as an intricacies of the most absurd and wonderful passions. Some people boast, others hide. But there is such a base passion that no one dares to admit even to themselves. And this passion is envy.
Severe corruption due to black envy
Envy itself is a corruption. An envious person does not need to carry out special rituals, it is enough to look with his own eye, and make a mental promise for destruction and failure - and the matter is ready. Everything went wrong. And the envious person will also rejoice, fix his black evil eye on the mental level - damage from envy.
And if we talk about base passions and human sins, then envy will turn out to be the worst of sins. Envy is the enemy of everything good that can be in a person.
An envious person can sometimes do nothing with the feelings that are born in the soul, although this does not serve as an excuse. Everyone is given the will and fortitude to tame their beasts - their passions. It is unlikely that they will calm down and reconcile completely, but even growling, they must be submissive. To the one who creates damage from envy, there is no, and there can be neither justification nor forgiveness. One way or another, the envious person will pay the bills for his deeds. But the worst thing is that his descendants will have to pay the price.
Powerful damage from envy - a manifestation of vampirism
Envy is not good. Envy is an evil feeling that destroys the soul, and it will not recede, will not go away just like that. It sets a destructive program, this is black damage from envy. Sometimes a bad prophecy whispered to oneself is enough for it to come true, for luck to turn away from a person.
And sometimes the absolutely incredible happens - the envious person pulls over someone else's successful,. The one who becomes a victim of the enemy, then regrets his gullibility, openness. The envious person forges his weapon from this and uses it against his victim.
Envy is a manifestation of vampirism. An envious person feels bad at the sight of someone else's success, pleasure, happiness. At the sight of the suffering of others, he feels an inner uplift, and rejoices in other people's failures more than his own successes. In passing, they induce black damage from envy, and watch with pleasure how others suffer disaster.
Watch the video methods of inducing damage to a person
Corruption from envy is energy dirt
What in everyday life is usually called the evil eye, is this very damage from envy. A black unrighteous thought is like a sticky web. It entangles the subtle bodies of a person, and he is no longer free. It is possible to determine whether there is damage on a person, whether he is caught in the network of an envious person by the same signs that allow one to judge the possible. The negative program, induced by the evil sorcerer during the magical rite, works according to the same principles, according to which the wishes of the envious person operate - these are programs of destruction, destruction, decay.
Envy is sticky energy dirt. Because of this, the Guardian Angel can move away, lose sight of his ward, and the person is left alone, without help, without protection, and falls ill.
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How to determine if there is damage
If, against the backdrop of success, everything suddenly went wrong for you, there is reason to think, but has anyone brought black damage from envy?
Remember with whom you have been talking lately, to whom you told about your plans, with whom you shared your joys. This will help to identify the envious. It is imperative to draw a conclusion from what happened, because mistakes should be learned from, and not forgotten about.
A black cat will help determine if there is damage. These animals are like sensors, they are very sensitive to any induced negativity.
Take the cat in your arms at the moment when she is in a calm state. It is better to do this in the evening, before going to bed. Hold it on your lap for 10 minutes. If the cat was calm, but in your arms she got nervous, began to meow, to break out - this means that she felt
Envy- this is an unpleasant feeling of a person, caused by irritation, as well as displeasure from the well-being and achievements of other people. Envy is a constant comparison and desire to possess something intangible or material. An envious feeling is characteristic of all people, regardless of character, nationality, temperament and gender. Conducted sociological studies have shown that this feeling weakens with age. The age category from 18 to 25 years old is acutely jealous, and closer to 60 years this feeling weakens.
Cause envy
The reasons for this state: dissatisfaction or need for something, lack of money, need, dissatisfaction with one's own appearance, lack of personal achievements.
Envy and its causes lie in a difficult childhood through the fault of the parents, if the child was not taught to accept himself as he is, if the child did not receive unconditional love, but only received praise for fulfilling certain requirements (washing dishes, playing the violin). If the parents scolded the child for any deviation from the rules, using offensive phrases, as well as using physical force. If parents taught their child that poverty, limitations, sacrifice are normal, but being rich is bad. If parents forced to share and did not allow the child to freely dispose of their things, if they pressed with guilt for the achieved happiness, joy, if they taught them to be openly afraid of manifestations of personal happiness in order to avoid the evil eye. If the parents did not give the attitude to expect good things from life, but inspired personal life attitudes, like "it's hard to live" or "life is a big problem."
As a result, a person grows up who does not know how to enjoy life, who has a huge number of complexes, beliefs, self-restraints, norms adopted from parents. An envious feeling instills in someone who is not internally free, who was instilled with self-criticism, sacrifice, who was kept in strictness and was not taught to expect bright and positive things from life. Such a person grows up in limitations and further limits himself, does not give himself freedom, does not allow himself to show joy.
What does envy mean? To envy means to live constantly in a system of comparison and identification. "Better - worse" is the main criterion for comparison. An envious person, comparing himself, begins to realize that he is worse in something else. In fact, these two concepts do not exist by themselves, they live in our heads.
The reason for envy is also explained by the fact that we communicate with ourselves around the clock, and to whom we envy, we observe only a moment. Here contradictions collide: the line of one's own life and flashes of brightness of someone else's life.
Signs of envy
Often, having told someone about personal joy, we feel that they are sincerely not happy with us, although they try to show it.
How to learn to recognize the signs of envy? Sign language will help you recognize and see the signs of envy of your interlocutor. Pay close attention to the face of the interlocutor. A forced smile reflects the dual state of a person. It's easier than ever to fake a smile. A crooked smile of the mouth and the absence of a gleam in the eyes speak of an insincere smile. If you notice the smile of the interlocutor with one mouth, this is an insincere facial expression, but just a mask. An envious smile opens or closes the teeth, may be less wide than usual. At the same time, the lips are tense, the corners of the mouth are often unnaturally stretched. A person is trying with might and main to show joy, while overcoming his own resistance. The smile visually looks like a glued one, living separately from the face, while the corners of the lips are lowered down, the eyes are sharp and attentively observing. A person unconsciously extinguishes his smile. Sometimes a person smiles with only one side, showing more of a smirk than a smile itself. The head is tilted to the side. Such behavior is more likely to be skeptical. Sometimes a person squints his eyes, and holds his hands near his mouth, covering it. Closed postures (hands hidden behind the back, in pockets) indicate a person’s desire to isolate themselves.
The slope of the body also says a lot during a conversation. If a person moves away during a conversation, this indicates that he wants to suspend it, perhaps it is unpleasant for him. The degree of sincerity is determined by the change in the degree of freedom, as well as the amplitude of movements. If the interlocutor is extremely constrained and restrained, then there is a possibility that he is holding back his thoughts and, if possible, does not show them to the interlocutor.
The study of envy
Many people claim that the envious feeling is unfamiliar to them. This is a controversial statement. Philosophers considered envy as a universal human phenomenon, noted in destructive functions, as well as in the desire to possess other people's property or to appropriate the achievements of another. Spinoza attributed the envious feeling to displeasure from someone else's happiness. Democritus noted that an envious feeling gives rise to discord among people. Helmut Scheck presented a comprehensive analysis of envy, including the entire socio-psychological and social aspect of human behavior. Envy leads to "ego-exhaustion", gives a state of mental fatigue. G. Shek relates it to the disease. Once rooted, this condition becomes incurable.
Research by the National Institute of Radiology (NIRS) of Japan revealed that the brain's reaction during the period of envy is noted in the anterior cingulate gyrus and the same area reacts to pain.
Melanie Klein notes that envy is the opposite of love and that an envious person is uncomfortable seeing pleasure in people. Such a person is good only from the suffering of others.
Christianity classifies an envious feeling as one of the seven deadly sins and compares it with its kindred despondency, but it differs in objectivity and is determined by sorrow for the well-being of one's neighbor. The main cause of envy in Christianity is pride. The proud cannot bear his equals, or those who are superior and in a better position.
Envy is born when the well-being of another arises, and with the cessation of well-being, it ceases. There are the following stages in the development of an envious feeling: inappropriate rivalry, zeal with annoyance, slander against an envious individual. Islam condemns envy in the Quran. According to Islam, Allah created people who feel envious as part of the worldly test, but warned them that they should avoid this feeling. There are tips to prevent the emergence of an envious feeling.
Envy is an ambiguous feeling that stands at the origins of wars and revolutions, shooting arrows of witticisms. This feeling supports vanity, and also starts the black flywheel of social movements, acting as the wrong side of the cloak of pride.
The study of envy has also discovered another function - stimulating, inducing a person to creative activity. Experiencing an envious feeling, people strive for superiority and make discoveries. The thought of creating something to make everyone jealous often leads to good results. However, the stimulating function is closely related to the destructive activity of a person.
How to protect yourself from envy? To avoid an envious attitude towards themselves, people try to hide the information about their well-being.
There is interesting data: 18% of respondents never tell anyone about their achievements and successes, up to 55.8% of respondents tell others about their successes if they trust their interlocutors.
Some philosophers, as well as sociologists, believe that an envious feeling is very useful for society. Envy breeds modesty. The typical envious person never becomes the one he envies, and often does not get what he envies, but modesty, provoked by the fear of envious feeling, has an important social significance. Often such modesty is insincere and false and gives people of low social status a sense of illusion that they do not come to this position by force.
In the time of Cain and Abel, the envious feeling suffered continuous attacks. Christians attributed it to mortal sins, leading to the death of the soul. John Chrysostom ranked envious people among beasts, demons. And crowds of preachers, thinkers, public figures attributed health problems, ozone holes, civil wars to the concentration of envy in the blood of earthlings. Only the lazy did not speak negatively against the envious feeling.
How does envy affect a person? In different ways, in some ways it is a useful thing. List of the virtues of envious feeling: competition, competition, survival mechanism, setting records. The lack of envy leads to the fact that a person remains unsuccessful, does not demand justice for himself.
Sheck argues that individuals are unable to heal from envious feelings, and also this feeling does not allow society to fall apart. Envy, in his opinion, is a natural reaction of the individual to. The negative emotions that have arisen towards the object of envy (anger, annoyance, hatred) act as defense mechanisms that mask the feeling of their own inferiority, while finding flaws in the object of envy, which makes it possible to reduce the significance of the object of envy and reduce tension. If a person realizes that the object of envy is not to blame for him, then aggression unfolds inside the envious person, while transforming into an emotion of guilt.
G. H. Seidler believes that an envious feeling leads to emotional experiences that are difficult to bear (despair). The envious person is characterized by the presence of shame - this is a discrepancy with the ideal Self and the result of self-reflection. The emotion of envy has physiological manifestations: a person turns pale or yellow, blood pressure rises.
Types of envy
Envy can be characterized by such epithets: caustic, hostile, burning, fierce, cruel, hidden, malicious, evil, harmless, good, respectful, powerless, ferocious, wild, inexpressible, incredible, strong, painful, limitless, light, unrestrained, limitless, deep, involuntary, sharp, unsatisfied, simple, jealous, slavish, timid, terrible, deadly, secret, quiet, frank, humiliating, cunning, black, cold, white, omnipotent, aching, salieric, satanic.
M. Scheler investigated impotent envy. This is a terrible kind of jealousy. It is directed against the individual as well as the essential being of the unknown individual, it is existential envy.
Types of envy: short-term (situational or envy-emotion) - victory in competitions, long-term (envy-feeling) - a single woman envies a successful married woman, and an envious colleague a successful employee.
Bacon identified two types of envy: private and public. The public form should not be ashamed or hidden, unlike the secret (private).
Feelings of envy
Envy is a complex feeling that arises in the process of comparison. It is a mixture of irritation, resentment, aggression, bitterness. An envious feeling arises when comparing one's health, oneself, one's appearance, position in society, abilities, one's successes with those people who undeservedly and deservedly have more. Frequent envy causes stress, wearing out the nervous system. The psyche connects the safety algorithm and causes contempt for the object of envy.
Envy gnaws and discontent grows if someone has something that is desirable for the individual. Dissatisfaction with the luck of another individual is expressed in hostility towards him. In some cases, annoyance, depression due to the alleged inferiority of oneself, a thirst for the missing property is manifested. Due to the fact that the desired object is often unattainable, the envious feeling is resolved through the rejection of desires, as well as the acceptance of reality.
The feeling of envy is conditionally divided into black and white. In the first case, it is marked by a conscious desire for indirect or direct harm to the individual we envy. Religions do not share the feeling of envy, referring it to mortal sins. There is another side to this feeling, pushing for personal achievement, being an incentive for progress.
Psychology of envy
Human envy is manifested in a feeling of annoyance and irritation, hostility and hostility, caused by the success, well-being, superiority of another person. An envious person attributes the object of his envy to the winner, and considers himself the loser. No reasonable arguments are able to stop negative emotions. Human envy turns someone else's success into their own inferiority, someone else's joy provokes their own annoyance and discontent.
Human envy forces the individual to experience a bunch of negative emotions: hostility, resentment, anger, aggression. The manifestation of white envy allows you to rejoice at the success of others.
The psychology of envy and its occurrence is associated with several theories. The first relates this feeling to innate, genetically laid down and inherited by us as a result of evolution from our ancestors. It is believed that the human envy of primitive society was the impetus for self-improvement. Men's envy pushed them to improve their fishing gear, weapons, and women's envy to attract men through constant adornment of themselves.
Teenage envy
Teenage envy can be directed to a variety of attributes: talent, physical strength, height, hair color, physique, possession of gadgets. Adults should be sympathetic to teenage envy, which is exacerbated during this period. You should not immediately respond to all the requests of a teenager and satisfy his desires, thus pleasing. The mistake of parents is that they immediately acquire the desired thing, brushing off the problem, and the next time the situation repeats itself and the envious feeling takes root, turning into a habit.
None of us is born envious; in the process of life, this feeling develops. When adults give an example of a more successful peer, they thereby cultivate their own embittered envious person, and do not create healthy competition. Never resort to such comparisons. In each such case, the child will have an envious feeling that will turn into irritation. The teenager will experience his inferiority, and also hang on himself the hated label of a loser. The world of the child will be perceived in a distorted reality, and comparison with other adolescents will become dominant.
How to overcome envy? The task of parents is to help the teenager to assert himself, as well as to determine his personal position in life. Explain to the child that an envious feeling first of all harms with its experiences. These experiences are reflected not only in the psyche of a teenager, but also in the physical condition. An envious feeling must be treated as a personal enemy and not given the opportunity to win over oneself.
Knowing the reasons and reasons that provoke an envious feeling, and this is someone else's wealth, the beauty of another person, good health, wealth, talent, intelligence, you can prepare yourself to meet this. It is necessary for yourself to identify personal achievements, talents, in no case compare yourself with others. A person is imperfect, so the smart ones tend to be content with what they have and what they themselves can achieve, and we will always be envious a little. If all these simple truths are conveyed to the child at an early age, then the teenager will grow up happy and free. Therefore, it is important to help children decide in time by making the right choice. Parents should prove this by personal example and in no case should discuss with him enviously the success of relatives, as well as neighbors.
How does envy affect a person? An envious feeling acts as a means of manipulation and is a danger to the weak in spirit. Such individuals will go to any lengths to achieve what they want. Envy is similar to anger, but anger, having become active, splashes out, and the envious feeling lurks and destroys a person from the inside. The envious feeling, condemned by society, must also be condemned by the person himself. That is the only way to get rid of it. A teenager must independently learn to recognize an envious feeling that he tries to win over to his side, thereby destroying relationships with friends, making him joyless, gloomy.
A common theory is that it notes the emergence of envy in a person in the process of social life. This theory is of the opinion that envious feeling is a consequence of the wrong upbringing of the child, which arises when compared with other children.
How to get rid of envy
Your life should include control and introspection. Control your own emotions, thoughts, negative desires. As soon as the first signs of envy appear, try to understand yourself, look for the roots of this feeling. Try to figure out what you really want for yourself. There is nothing wrong with this. Think about what you lack for this and, for example, increase your productivity, become punctual, engage in self-development, and you will achieve the same success as your object of envy. If your envious feeling is destructive, and you want a person to lose something, then ask yourself, what will it give me? Envious people are often unaware of the existing problems of those they envy. Do not judge a person's well-being by external signs, since this is the visible side of someone else's life, often imaginary.
How to get rid of envy? Focusing on your affairs and life will allow you to switch from an envious feeling. Stop thinking about other people's virtues and successes, don't compare yourself, think about your own uniqueness. Think about how to become the first in your favorite business. Engage in self-development and. Sudden attacks of envy will leave you if you engage in meditation,. Being offended by fate and envying, we thereby accumulate a bad mood. We make mistakes in life, we complicate our lives. To break out of the vicious circle will help to cultivate a sense of gratitude for what we have. Appreciate what you have.
The following tips will help get rid of someone else's envy: do not share your success with envious people, ask the envious for help, this will disarm them, trust them, do not stoop to a showdown with an open envious feeling. Distance yourself from the envious person and do not make contact with him.
Envy eats a person, and it does not depend on whether he radiates it or receives it. This feeling turns friends into enemies, breaks relationships, spoils psychological health. There is no need to envy, and envious people should be avoided. We will talk further about what envy is and what you should be afraid of.
Envy, like jealousy, is the worst quality of the human soul. Even in the Bible envy is mentioned as one of the deadly sins. And this is not accidental: it can lead to tragic consequences.
Envy dooms a person to loneliness!
Envious people, realizing that everything around is richer and happier, fence themselves off from society in order to get rid of an inferiority complex. Sometimes they show their feelings to others and those, in turn, do not want to communicate with such people. Envy does not attract, it repels.
How envy affects a person psychologically
What effect does envy have on a person?
First of all, it interferes with life. The time you spend worrying about someone else's accomplishments could be used wisely for your own good. Because of envy, a person stops developing, gushing with ideas that could lead him to success.
Envy is the cause of many bad deeds and even crimes. Hatred, meanness, aggression - all these feelings go hand in hand with envy, and may well result in a terrible act - theft or murder.
Envy dooms a person to loneliness. Envious people, realizing that everything around is richer and happier, fence themselves off from society in order to get rid of an inferiority complex. Sometimes they show their feelings to others and those, in turn, do not want to communicate with such people. Envy does not attract, it repels.
How to get rid of envy of people
What to do if you constantly manifest envy of other people? You can get rid of this harmful feeling quite successfully. First of all, you need to understand that we are all different - outwardly, in social status, mental abilities. This will be the key to success in getting rid of the problem. To avoid serious consequences, you need to try not to allow envious thoughts and switch to achieving any results. And one more thing: learn to be happy for other people. Before envying someone, it is better to take an example from this person and try to achieve your goals - no less important and significant.
How does envy manifest itself in people?
It is necessary to avoid envious people in your environment, as they will attract negativity to you. But for this you need to learn to recognize such personalities. How to determine if a person has envy? You should pay attention to several important points.
- If a person’s mood deteriorates in your presence, most likely he is jealous. You need to pay attention to his reaction during the conversation. If he reacts irritably to your remarks, jokes evilly - this is envy.
- If your friend has stopped complimenting you (applies more to girls) - this is also a sign of envy.
- If a person does not react when you talk about your successes and puts on a mask of indifference, he may also have a negative attitude towards you.
- Another sign of envy is copying your gestures, style, habits.
Some people directly say that they are jealous. Even if you think that they are not joking, take a closer look. Perhaps this is not a joke at all, this person really shows envy towards you. Be careful!
Have you often thought that someone is jealous of you, and this envy poisons the life of both you and him? There are as many as eight signs by which you can understand whether this is so - and the sooner the better ...
Envious people bring misfortune to others, and torment themselves." - William Penn
Imagine that you have reached a goal that you have been working towards for many years, or, say, have achieved success in some difficult business ... and suddenly found that someone from your inner circle is not at all proud of your success, and is not happy about it - on the contrary he or she is jealous of what you have achieved. Envy is a rather vile feeling, and sometimes it can turn even the closest people into enemies just because your achievements or success have touched some secret strings in the depths of their souls.
Psychologist Steven Stosny believes that envy “makes us replay far-fetched grievances in our heads over and over again, and the longer you do this, the less they have to do with reality. All strong emotions carry the illusion of conviction, and envy convinces us that this distorted perception of the world is true.
Everyone has experienced this unpleasant feeling at least once in their lives, and most likely it happened much more often. But dealing with your envy is one thing, but dealing with someone else's is quite another. After all, we have at least some control over our feelings, but how can we influence how others feel about us? And because the sooner you can recognize the signs that someone is jealous of you, the sooner you can start thinking about what to do with a similar situation.
So, here are eight signs that someone is jealous of you:
1. Fake praise
When someone is jealous of you, it may not be immediately noticeable. Moreover, while communicating with you, they can even give you compliments (sincere, or full of sarcasm and oozing with passive aggression). But in any case, they will praise you only in your presence - and as soon as you leave their company, there is not a trace of their admiration.
If you ask them a direct question, then most likely they will pretend that they do not envy you at all, and do not understand what you are talking about at all. How to counter this? One way is to sincerely praise them for their own successes and congratulate them when something good happens in their lives. This will help them see you as a sincere and honest person, and perhaps make them temper their jealousy.
Clinical psychologist and M.D. Leon F. Seltzer writes the following about this: “Of course, I don’t want to say that you should question any compliments and praise, but when those from whom you didn’t expect it at all begin to praise you, it’s worth considering if they are doing this with some hidden purpose. This way you minimize the possibility of accepting compliments at face value, which in fact turned out to be a fake with a poisonous lining.
2. They try to downplay your accomplishments.
No matter what you have achieved, and how much work you had to put in to achieve this goal, your envious people will anyway argue that you were just lucky and that you didn’t work so hard to achieve success. Their arguments often seem more or less rational ... but they can also be rude and offensive.
"The people who envy you the most need what you have the most", - says a successful businessman Faruk Radvan.
Don't fall for them! If you start arguing with them, especially in a raised voice, they will only continue to try to trample your success into the dirt. Be humble, but don't deny your accomplishments. If you start boasting right and left, then their envy will definitely not go anywhere, but will only become stronger.
3. They inflate and exalt their own successes.
From time to time, those who envy you try to make you jealous by inflating their successes and achievements to incredible proportions, even if they do not deserve it at all. In particular, they tend to do this when you rejoice in your own success. In general, such people may well announce their own engagement during your wedding - saying that their wedding will be twice as magnificent.
But why do they swing their success from side to side with such frenzy in front of you, like a matador's rag in front of a bull?
Because, quite possibly, they are not nearly as successful as they want to show ... or, for example, less successful than you. As noted author Bob Bly writes, “There will always be people around you who are filled with negative thoughts - not only about those they envy (you), but also about themselves, as well as their own inability to achieve their goals (for example, to acquire their own business, or, say, get really rich).
And although such behavior cannot but irritate, I still advise you not to resent him openly and openly - this will only provoke envious people, and they will finally be sure that their apparent or imaginary success somehow offends you. Instead, sincerely and wholeheartedly congratulate them, and rejoice with them. Show them an example of the right and healthy reaction to the success of others - and, who knows, maybe this will help them change their behavior for the better.
4. They imitate you
Someone who is jealous of you may want to be better than you and be just like you in every way at the same time. They may well imitate the way you speak or the way you dress in the hope of feeling better or being as successful as you. Instead of resenting this, try to convince them to find their own style and path to the goal, and if they follow your advice, support them along the way. Show them that you don't have to be you to be something, and that they can achieve so much more if they are themselves.
5. They try to beat you (and everyone else) into anything.
Jealous people try to compete with you in everything - primarily because they want to be successful compared to you at least in some way, or, as clinical psychologist Melanie Greenberg writes, they "Either unsure of themselves or arrogant, and though to prove their superiority to you."
And although you no doubt have an occasional urge to show such people where they really belong and leave them behind to swallow road dust, it is better to refuse if further competition does not benefit either you or them, or even refuse altogether. participate in these useless cockroach races. If they want to bet you who gets married first, buys a car, or, say, has kids, just tell them, "This is not a competition, and that's enough." The sooner you refuse to play their games, the sooner they will give up and stop trying to beat you in them.
6. They rejoice in your failures.
Those who envy you usually rejoice at your every mistake or catch up with your superiors at work. And although they rarely show their joy openly, in their thoughts they arrange ritual dances of joy around the fire after each time you fall into a muddy puddle. How to counter this? Accept your mistakes and failures with honor and dignity! You can always remind envious people that they learn from mistakes and that they are a normal part of life. And if they fail to upset you, they will never get the pleasure they expected from this situation.
7. They gossip behind your back.
Jealous people will always find a way to spread bad rumors about you behind your back. This in itself is disgusting, even if you do not take into account the content of such rumors and rumors. The best way to deal with such a situation is to call the person behaving in this way to a frank conversation.
As writer James Clear puts it, “…the negativity we feel from other people is like a wall. And if you concentrate on it, you will definitely crash into it. You just can't break through the wall of negative emotions, anger, and self-doubt. And your mind chooses exactly the path that your attention is directed to. Criticism and negativity won't stop you from reaching the finish line eventually, but it can definitely make your journey much longer."
Since envious people rarely go into open confrontation, a serious conversation about their actions may well make them rethink their behavior, or even realize how petty they are behaving, and give up their envy.
8. They hate you
If there is someone in your environment who hates you for no apparent reason, they may just be jealous of you. We often perceive such envy the hardest, because in general we want to be loved, and we do not like someone else's hatred, especially unreasonable. We often feel in ourselves the desire to prove to such people that we are more than worthy, so that we, if not loved, then at least respected ... but it is not a fact that we will be able to do this. And if all efforts to please this person have not led to any result ... perhaps it's time to cut him out of your life. You do not need this negativity at all, besides, your very presence nearby makes such people wind up their hatred towards you. The best way to remedy this situation is to get rid of this person, at least until this senseless and unreasonable hatred burns out in him.
A few final thoughts...
Coping with someone else's envy (and envious people) can be not so easy. Often, upon hearing their snickering, you may want to simply send them to hell, not really choosing the expressions. But is it always worth it? By dealing with someone else's jealousy in a more positive and healthy way, you end up helping not only yourself, but also the person you're having a problem with. After all, he may well turn out to be not at all such a bastard as you imagine, but just a person with low self-esteem ... So isn't it better, instead of throwing insults with him at every meeting, to help him cope with this problem, at the same time saving him from tendencies to envy other people? Well, knowing the signs of an envious person, you can do it much faster and easier.
There is nothing worse than achieving your goal, becoming successful and ... suddenly discovering that the people around you do not admire your victories or are not at all positive towards you, but rather feel envy. Enviable feelings can cause them to act unkindly towards you, especially in the face of your own accomplishments or successes.
Psychologist Stephen Stosney says that jealousy “makes you think the same thing over and over again, and the more you do it, the less you experience reality. All emotions have the illusion of confidence, and jealousy makes you confident in your perception of the world.
Everyone, at least once in their life, felt these unpleasant emotions, and most likely much more. Although it seems much more difficult for us to cope with the fact that other people envy us. After all, we can control ourselves, but we cannot control the emotions of others. Spotting the signs that someone is jealous can be the first step to fixing it.
Here are eight signs that you are envious.
1. False Praise
Sometimes, when someone is jealous of you, they are often the first to make a compliment that, at first glance, sounds quite sincere. However, you will soon find that all these people will roll their eyes as soon as you leave the room.
They prefer to pretend that they are not jealous than to solve this problem. One way to put things in order is to give them sincere compliments, and genuinely rejoice when something good happens to them. This will let them know that you are a sincere person, and will allow them to curb their envy.
2. Belittling your success
Regardless of what you have achieved or how hard you have gone to the goal, envious people will always treat your victories as a fluke.
“The people who envy you the most are those who most need what you have,” says M. Farooq Radwan, MA.
In no case should you follow their lead, it will only provoke evil tongues.
Stay reserved but confident. If you start to boast, envious people, most likely, will not change their attitude.
3. Show off your successes
An envious person may be more inclined to flaunt their successes than they really need to be. They can be proud of their accomplishments while you celebrate yours.
But why do they put their success first?
Maybe they are not as successful as you.
While it may be unpleasant, feeling discouraged can only make them feel more justified in their behavior. Instead, offer them sincere praise for their accomplishments. Leading example is a good way to change someone's behavior.
4. They imitate you
The envious person alternatively wants to be better than you and also to be like you. They may imitate the way you talk or the way you dress to feel more confident. Instead of letting it upset you, try encouraging them to go their own way. When they do their thing, give them positive reinforcement. Show them that they don't have to be you to become a person.
5. They compete
People who are jealous tend to be competitive because they always want to be the one who reaps success, or as clinical psychologist Melanie Greenberg says, they are "either insecure or arrogant or want to prove superior."
While it may be tempting to tear them down, refuse unhealthy competition, or even refuse this participation. If they're trying to argue with you about a job promotion, just tell them, "This is not a competition." Your refusal to play games will reduce their attempts to get the better of you.
6. Celebrating Your Failures
The envious at heart rejoices when you make mistakes or receive a remark. Although they may not show it, they often secretly enjoy your failures. Treat your mistakes with dignity! You can always remind them that mistakes are part of life and learning. If you are not upset, they do not get the pleasure they would like to experience.
7. They gossip behind your back.
Jealous people will always find a way to talk about you behind your back. It's not funny and what they say can be malicious and hurtful. The best way to deal with such people is to simply confront them directly. As author James Clear notes, “…other people's negativity is like a wall. And if you focus on that, then let him in. You will be blocked by negative emotions, anger and self-doubt. You will always think about what you are focused on. Criticism and negativity won't stop you from reaching the finish line, but they can distract you from it."
Because envious people don't tend to be outwardly confrontational, talking to them seriously about what they're doing can be enough to make them rethink their behavior or make them stop completely.
8. They hate you
If you know someone who hates you for any conceivable reason, they may just be jealous of you. This is hard to deal with because we often don't like being hated for no reason. You may feel the desire to show this person that you are quite a nice person. If you can't charm them, then the best thing to do is cut them out of your life. You don't need this negativity and they are most likely working on hating you for no reason. The best way to fix all this is to let go.
Final Thoughts
Dealing with someone's jealousy can be difficult. You may feel the urge to just tell them everything. But, dealing with the envious person in a non-confrontational and positive way is ultimately better for you and for the other person. They may be experiencing a lot of self-esteem issues that need to be worked through, and your discouragement will not eliminate their jealous tendencies. Knowing these signs of envy will make it easier for you to communicate with envious people and allow you to deal with them in a positive manner.
