Psychological parables and their analysis. Parable "Fragile gifts"

30.09.2019

Psychological parables:

Sea stars

A man was walking along the shore and suddenly saw a boy who was picking up something from the sand and throwing it into the sea. The man came closer and saw that the boy was picking up starfish from the sand. They surrounded him from all sides. It seemed that there were millions of starfish on the sand, the shore was literally dotted with them for many kilometers.

Why are you throwing those starfish into the water? the man asked, coming closer.

If they remain on the shore until tomorrow morning, when the tide begins to ebb, they will die, - the boy answered, without stopping his occupation.

But that's just stupid! the man shouted. - Look around! There are millions of starfish here, the coast is just dotted with them. Your attempts won't change anything!

The boy picked up the next starfish, thought for a moment, threw it into the sea and said:

No, my attempts will change a lot... for this star.

Parable about happiness

When the Creator finished sculpting a man, he had a piece of unused clay left and he asked:

What else can you give?

Give me happiness.

Well, well, stretch out your hand, - and put the last piece of clay on the palm of a person.

Old grandfather and granddaughter

This wise fairy tale shows us that we are an example for our children, a guide, they read from us all the information about our behavior, about our attitude towards other people, about the manner of behavior in any situations. And the behavior of our children is a mirror image of ourselves.

Old grandfather and granddaughter:

The grandfather became very old. His legs could not walk, his eyes could not see, his ears could not hear, he had no teeth. And when he ate, it flowed back from his mouth. The son and daughter-in-law stopped putting him at the table, and let him dine at the stove.

They took him down once to dine in a cup. He wanted to move it, but he dropped it and broke it. The daughter-in-law began to scold the old man for spoiling everything in the house and breaking cups, and said that now she would give him dinner in the pelvis. The old man just sighed and said nothing.

Once a husband and wife sit at home and look - their little son plays planks on the floor - something works out. The father asked: “What are you doing, Misha?” And Misha says: “It’s me, father, I’m doing the pelvis. When you and your mother are old, to feed you from this pelvis.

Husband and wife looked at each other and wept. They felt ashamed that they had offended the old man so much; and from then on they began to put him at the table and look after him.

Mirror

One day a man came to the sage.

You wise! Help me! I feel bad. My daughter does not understand me. She doesn't hear me. She doesn't speak to me. Why does she need a head, ears, tongue then? She is cruel. Why does she need a heart?

The sage said:

When you return home, paint her portrait, take it to your daughter and silently give it to her.

The next day, an angry man burst into the sage and exclaimed:

Why did you advise me yesterday to commit this stupid act!? Was bad. And it got even worse! She returned the drawing to me full of resentment!

What did she say to you? - asked the sage.

She said, “Why did you bring this to me? Isn't the mirror enough for you?"

The parable of the slipped atheist

Once an atheist was walking along a cliff, slipped and fell down. As he fell, he managed to grab hold of a branch of a small tree growing out of a crevice in the rock. Hanging on a branch, swaying in the cold wind, he realized the hopelessness of his situation: there were mossy boulders below, and there was no way to climb up. His hands, holding on to the branch, were getting weaker every moment. Well, he thought, only God can save me now. I never believed in God, but maybe I was wrong. There's nothing to lose anyway." And so he called out:

God! If You exist, save me and I will believe in You! There was no answer. He called again:

Please God! I never believed in You, but if You save me now, I will believe in You from now on.

Suddenly there was a voice:

Oh no, you won't, I see what's written in your heart!

The man was so surprised that he almost let go of the branch.

Please God! I actually think so! I will believe!

Okay, I'll help you, - the voice was heard again. - Let go of the thread.

Release the thread? the man exclaimed. - Don't you think I'm crazy?

What father forgot

Son, I turn to you when you have already fallen asleep, slipping one hand under your cheek. I look at you and see a strand of blond hair stuck to your wet forehead. I just sneaked into your room without anyone noticing. A few minutes ago, I was about to sit down at my desk in the library to look through some papers, and suddenly a suffocating wave of repentance swept over me. And I came to your bedroom with the consciousness of my own guilt.

And that's what I'm thinking, son: I've been too hard on you all day. I scolded you when you were getting ready for school for smearing mud all over your face with a towel. I gave you a scolding for not polished shoes. I could not restrain myself and called you offensive words when you accidentally dropped your things on the floor. At breakfast, I also found something to complain about. You spilled the juice from the glass. You swallowed food in large chunks. He laid down the table. Spread too thick a layer of butter on bread. When I had already boarded the morning train and you shouted: “Bye, dad!”, I did not find anything better: how to answer with a frown: “Now straighten your shoulders!” In the evening, everything happened again. Returning home, I saw you crawling on your knees, playing balls with your comrades right on the pavement. Holes were worn out on your stockings, and I, not thinking about how humiliating it was for you, in front of your Friends, drove you from the street home. “Stockings are expensive - if I had bought them myself, I would have kept more of them!” And as soon as the father's tongue turned to say this to his son!

And then, when I was reading, sitting in the library, and you timidly came to me, looking at me with guilty eyes? I looked up from reading, gave you a displeased look and muttered: “What do you want?”

You didn’t say anything, but just rushed headlong towards me, wrapped your arms around my neck and kissed me. Your hands squeezed me with such love, as if the Almighty himself had put it in your little heart, and even my neglect of you did not wither it. And then you left, and I heard your footsteps on the stairs as you went upstairs.

Only a few minutes passed, and the newspaper suddenly slipped from my weakened fingers. Fear gripped me. God, I thought, what is habit doing to me? The habit of finding fault, reprimanding - and this is what you get from me every day simply because you are a boy. You can't say that I don't love you; rather, I just expect too much from you, although you are just too small for this. And I measure you by the standards of my own age.

But there is so much kindness and sincerity in your character. Your little heart can actually be very big - like the dawn over the hills. I figured it out when you ran into the library today and kissed me goodnight. You did it spontaneously, impulsively, but that's good. Everything else is nonsense compared to this. And now I've come to you, sleeping in your bed, and I'm kneeling before you, feeling hungry!

Of course, this does not atone for my guilt before you, especially since you still would not understand me if tomorrow morning, after your awakening, I would retell you everything that was said above. However, tomorrow I will be a real father! I will become your friend, your sorrows will be my sorrows and your joys my joys. And even if I want to say something harsh to you, I will bite my tongue. I will repeat, like a prayer: "He is still just a boy - a little boy!"

I'm afraid that before that I perceived you as an adult, and not as a child. But now, especially when I see you curled up in your bed, I understand that you are still just a child. Yesterday you were resting on your mother's chest, resting your head on her shoulder. I wanted too much from you.

Let's not judge people, but learn to understand them. Let's try to find out, and for what reasons they act in this way, and not in another way. This is much more interesting and useful than being critical; this generates sympathy, tolerance and kindness in the souls of people. “To know everything means to forgive everything.”

As Dr. Johnson says, "God himself does not see fit to judge a man before his last day."

Shall we not follow His example?

Principle 1:

Don't criticize, judge or complain.

Find out the reason

A traveler walking along the river heard desperate children's cries. Running to the shore, he saw children drowning in the river and rushed to save them. Noticing a passing man, he called him for help. He began to help those who were still afloat. Seeing the third traveler, they called him for help, but he, ignoring the calls, accelerated his steps. "Do you care about the fate of the children?" - asked the rescuers.

The third traveler answered them: “I see that you two are coping so far. I will run to the turn, find out why the children fall into the river, and try to prevent it.

Two friends

One day they argued and one of them slapped the other. The latter, feeling pain, but saying nothing, wrote in the sand:

Today my best friend slapped me in the face.

They kept walking and found an oasis where they decided to swim. The one who got slapped almost drowned, and his friend saved him. When he came to, he wrote on a stone: "Today my best friend saved my life."

The one who slapped and who saved his friend's life asked him:

When I offended you, you wrote in the sand, and now you write in stone. Why?

The friend replied:

When someone offends us, we must write it in the sand so that the winds can erase it. But when someone does something good, we must engrave it in stone so that no wind can erase it.

Pig and cow

The pig complained to the cow that she was treated badly:

People always talk about your kindness and tender eyes. Of course, you give them milk and butter, but I give them more: sausages, hams and chops, leather and stubble, even my legs are boiled! And still no one loves me. Why so?

The cow thought for a moment and answered:

Maybe because I give everything while I'm still alive?

Nothing that isn't true...

One day a blind man was sitting on the steps of a building with a hat at his feet and a sign reading "I'm blind, please help!"

One person passed by and stopped. He saw an invalid who had only a few coins in his hat. He tossed him a couple of coins and, without his permission, wrote new words on the tablet. He left it to the blind man and left.

In the afternoon he returned and saw that the hat was full of coins and money. The blind man recognized him by his steps and asked if he was the man who had copied the tablet. He also wanted to know what exactly he had written.

He replied: “Nothing that would not be true. I just wrote it a little differently." He smiled and left.

The new inscription on the plate was: “It is spring now, but I cannot see it. Beautiful day and I don't see it».

Psychological parables

Parables are not just texts, not just stories. Each parable can give something, teach something, it contains some certain truth, some certain lesson, a small or big law of the World in which we live.

This approach can be applied to work with children and adults. When working with people with physical or mental illnesses, during an age crisis, mental trauma, loss of a loved one, etc. Art therapists use ready-made stories to help them understand the meaning of stories and recognize the value of their own experience. Narrative can be used to free the client from habitual, stereotyped meanings and behavioral programs. Turning to parables, a person undergoing an internal crisis and feelings of guilt, fear and despair can receive the support he needs.
It is not uncommon for the client to use borrowed stories as a safer or more convenient way to tell about himself than to create his own biographical narrative.
Through parables, one can gain access to the knowledge of the laws of the three-dimensional world. Moreover, this access is facilitated, because parables are the art of words to get right into the heart. This is a kind of educational material that will certainly help an attentive and thoughtful student to travel the World consciously and joyfully.
Abul-Faraj called parables stories that refresh the mind and remove grief and sadness from the heart. “Let them serve as a comfort to the afflicted, a healing balm for the brokenhearted, a guide for those who love instruction, and a best friend for those who appreciate the funny,” he wrote.

Merchant and parrot
The eastern merchant had a talking parrot. One fine day, a bird overturned a bottle of oil. The merchant got angry and hit the parrot on the back of the head with a stick. Since then, the smart parrot has forgotten how to speak. He lost the feathers on his head and became completely bald. One day, as he was sitting on a shelf in his master's shop, a bald-headed customer came in. His appearance brought the parrot into a terrible excitement. He jumped, flapped his wings, wheezed, grunted, and finally, to everyone's amazement, suddenly regained the ability to say: "You also knocked over a bottle of oil and got a cuff on the head? That's why you have no hair now!" (According to Movlana)

Rabbi and God
The rabbi talked to God about heaven and hell. "I'll show you what hell is," the god said and led the rabbi into a room where a large round table stood in the middle. The people around the table were starving and in despair. On the table was a pot of meat, so tasty that the rabbi's mouth watered. Everyone sitting at the table had a spoon with a very long handle. And although the spoons perfectly reached the pot, their handles were so long that the eaters could not bring the spoon to their mouth and therefore remained hungry. The rabbi saw that their suffering was truly terrible.
"And now you will see paradise," said the god, and they went into another room, exactly the same as the first. It had a large round table in the middle and a pot of meat. The people sitting around also held long-handled spoons in their hands, but they were all full and well-fed, they laughed and talked. The rabbi could not understand anything. "It's simple, but it requires a certain skill," said the god. "In this room, as you can see, people have learned to feed each other."

The Parable of the Two Trees
Two trees grew in the same forest. When the raindrops fell on the leaves or the water washed the roots of the first tree, it absorbed quite a bit and said: “If I take more, what will be left for others?”
The second tree took all the water that nature gave it. When the sun gave light and warmth to the second tree, it enjoyed bathing in golden rays, while the first took only a small part for itself.
Years have passed. The branches and leaves of the first tree were so small that they could not absorb even a drop of rain, the sun's rays could not get through to the meager fruits, being lost in the crowns of other trees. “All my life I have shared with others, and now I receive nothing in return,” the tree silently repeated again and again. Nearby grew a second tree, whose luxurious branches were richly decorated with large fruits. “Thank you, Almighty, for giving me everything in this life. Now, years later, I want to give back a hundred times more by doing what you do. Under my branches, I will shelter thousands of travelers from the scorching sun or rain. My fruits will delight many generations of people with their taste. Thank you for giving me this opportunity - to give, ”the second tree said.

force of habit
The man had been accustomed for twenty years to visit his mistress daily in the evenings and spend time there in conversation and playing cards. And so, when his lawful wife died, friends and relatives advised him:
- We all know you. It would be better if you married her, brought her to your house. Remember the wise words of our ancestors: “There is no evil without good.” A person did not agree with his relatives and friends:
- No, no, that won't happen. How will I break my twenty-year habit? If I bring her to my house, where should I go in the evenings, where should I spend my time, who should I talk to, who should I tell about my problems?

Peasant's son
The king died. There was no unanimity among the nakharars and ishkhans, and they could not choose a new king from among themselves. They thought and thought and chose the son of a peasant as king.
And then one day his father came to the king and said:
Son, do you recognize me?
“How can I recognize you when I don’t recognize myself,” the son replied.

Father and beans
On the first day of Great Lent, a village priest put forty-nine beans in his pocket in order to determine the day of the end of the fast by throwing away one bean every day. While washing the priest's clothes, his wife noticed that his pocket was full of beans. “Batiushka loves beans, I’ll add a little to him, let him eat for health.” And so she did. Batiushka threw one bean out of his pocket every day, but it did not end.
Great Lent has passed, but for the village, it has not ended.
And then one day the peasants asked the priest:
- Father, when will Lent end?
- Looking at the beans in my pocket, there are still many days left.

Parable of the statue
Once upon a time there lived a man devoted to the Buddha with all his heart. He had a wooden statue of the Buddha, which he prayed to and treated as a shrine. One cold winter night, he was very cold, almost numb. There was not a piece of wood in the house to start a fire, and he prayed frantically to the Buddha. The Buddha appeared and asked:
- Why don't you burn my statue?
The man was very frightened, "It must be the devil tempting me." And asked again:
- What you said? Burn a Buddha statue? Never! Never!
The Buddha laughed and said:
- If you're looking for me in a statue, you're missing me. I'm in your heart! Burn the statue!

Three golden pieces
One king in ancient times wanted to test the mind and observation skills of the king of a neighboring kingdom, and at the same time the ingenuity of his people. He sent his neighbor three golden figures of the same kind and the same weight. The king was asked to determine which of the figures was the most valuable.
Together with his courtiers, the king carefully examined the figures, but could not detect the slightest difference. Even the wisest of the sages of his kingdom were ready to swear that there was no difference between the figures. It was very difficult for the king to realize that in his kingdom no one could figure out what the difference was between the figures. The whole kingdom took part in solving the riddle, and everyone tried their best - but all to no avail.
When the king was already forced to admit defeat, a young man languishing in prison undertook to discover the difference between the figures, if only he would be allowed to examine them. The king ordered to bring the young man to the palace and ordered to show him three golden figures. The young man examined them very carefully and finally established that each of the figures had a small hole in the ear. Then, to check, he slipped a thin silver wire into it. It turned out that the first figure had a silver wire come out of its mouth, the second one - from the other ear, and the third one came from the navel. After thinking for a while, the young man turned to the king.
“Your Majesty,” he said, “I think that the solution to the riddle lies before us like an open book. You just need to try to read it. You see how all people are different from each other, and each of these figures is one of a kind The first figure is reminiscent of those who are in a hurry to tell everything they heard.The second figure is similar to those who, as they say, "It flies in one ear, flies out the other. "The third figure is in many ways similar to those who remember what they heard and takes it to heart. Sir! Now judge which figure is the most valuable. Whom would you choose and make your entourage? The one who keeps nothing, the one to whom your words are like wind, or the one who can be completely trusted?

Polite guest
One day the Sultan was giving a big feast. All noble persons were invited, only they forgot about the mullah. However, he was among the guests and felt like a fish in water. The Sultan, in some confusion, took the mullah aside: "How did it happen that you are here, because you were not invited?" "If the owner does not know his duties and did not invite me, then I can use my duties and be a polite guest," the mullah replied modestly.

Not a big difference
One eastern ruler had a terrible dream, as if all his teeth fell out one by one. In great agitation, he summoned an interpreter of dreams to him. He listened to him anxiously and said: "Lord, I must tell you the sad news. You will lose all your loved ones one by one." These words aroused the wrath of the sovereign. He ordered that the unfortunate man be thrown into prison and another interpreter be called, who, after listening to the dream, said: "I am happy to tell you the good news - you will outlive all your relatives." The ruler was delighted and generously rewarded him for this prediction. The courtiers were very surprised. "After all, you told him the same thing as your poor predecessor, so why was he punished and you rewarded?" they asked. To which the answer followed: "We both interpreted the dream in the same way. But it all depends not on what to say, but how to say it."

The shadow side of the sun
A learned man used to visit Prophet Muhammad every day. One day the prophet took him aside and said, "Don't come every day, then we'll love each other more." And then he told the following story. A scientist was asked: "The sun is so beautiful, so magnificent, why, however, cannot we say that we always love it equally strongly?" The scientist replied: "The sun shines every day. And only in winter, when it is hidden behind clouds, do we begin to appreciate it."

Give him your hand
A man was drowning in the swamp of northern Persia. He was completely immersed in the quagmire, and only his head was still peeking out. The unfortunate yelled at the top of his lungs, asking for help. Soon a crowd gathered at the scene. There was a daredevil who wished to save the drowning man. "Give me your hand!" he shouted to him. "I'll pull you out of the swamp." But the drowning man cried out for help and did nothing so that he could help him. "Give me your hand!" - the man kept repeating to him. In response, there were only plaintive cries for help. Then another man came out of the crowd and said: "You see that he cannot give you his hand. Give him yours, then you will be able to save him."

Poverty
Once a poor man, who complained to everyone about his cross, about his poverty, imagined in a dream that he was in a spacious room, which was all lined with crosses of various sizes, and all these crosses were covered with bedspreads. A secret voice spoke to the poor man:
-You complain about your cross, about your poverty, choose any other cross for yourself.
The poor man began to choose. He took up the first cross, he did not lift it; the other took it and lifted it up, but even he was beyond his strength - it was very heavy; the third cross seemed not heavy to him, but with its corners it painfully cut his shoulders. So he went through all the crosses, but he did not find a single one according to his strength. There was one more cross left in the corner, which the poor man did not experience, because this cross seemed to him larger and heavier than the others.
Raising this cross, the poor man joyfully shouted:
- Here I will take on this cross, although it is large, it is lighter than others!
They removed the veil from this cross, and on it was an inscription - poverty.

wooden feeder
Once there lived a very old man. His eyes were blind, his hearing dulled, his knees trembled. He could hardly hold a spoon in his hands and while eating he often spilled soup on the tablecloth, and sometimes some of the food fell out of his mouth. The son and his wife looked with disgust at the old man and, while eating, began to put him in a corner behind the stove, and the food was served to him in an old saucer. From there, he looked sadly at the table, and his eyes became moist. Once his hands were shaking so much that he could not hold a saucer of food. It fell to the floor and broke. The young mistress began to scold the old man, but he did not say a word, but only sighed heavily. Then they bought him a wooden bowl. Now he had to eat from it.
Once, when the parents were sitting at the table, their four-year-old son entered the room with a piece of wood in his hands.
- What do you want to do? asked the father.
- A wooden feeder, - answered the kid. Mom and dad will eat from it when I grow up.

Child
There was a drought in one city. Summer was in full swing, and the city priest called everyone to the temple in the morning to pray for rain. The whole city came, and the whole city laughed at one child. The child came with an umbrella. And everyone laughed and said:
- Fool, why did you bring an umbrella? You will lose. There will be no rain.
The child said:
- And I thought that if you pray, the rain will come.

What do you have in your wallet
One day Jesus Christ was passing through a village. A large crowd of dissatisfied people gathered, who, surrounding him, began to vilify him. Jesus Christ stood and smiled. One person, who was watching what was happening, approached Jesus Christ and asked why he was behaving this way. Jesus Christ replied:
- Everyone gives what he has in his wallet.

About those who gave us life
A young man fell in love with a girl of a different nationality. He decided to marry her. The girl said: “I will marry you, but first do a hundred things for me.” The guy began to fulfill her whims. from this rock. The young man jumped off and broke his leg. Then she told him to walk and not limp. And there were other tasks: to swim across the river and not get his hands wet; stop the enraged horse and bring him to his knees; cut the apple that the girl put on her chest ...
The guy completed ninety-nine deeds. One thing remained. Then the girl said: "Now forget your mother and father and your tongue." Without thinking twice, the young man jumped on a horse, waved his whip and galloped off forever.

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One day, a man came home late from work, tired and twitchy as always, and saw that his five-year-old son was waiting for him at the door.
- Dad, can I ask you something?
- Of course, what happened?
- Dad, how much do you get?
- It's none of your business! - the father was indignant. - And then, why do you need it?
- I just want to know. Please, tell me, how much do you get per hour?
- Well, actually, 500. And what?
- Dad- - the son looked at him from the bottom up with very serious eyes. - Dad, can you borrow 300 for me?
"You only asked so I could give you money for some stupid toy?" he shouted. - Immediately march to your room and go to bed! You can't be so selfish! I work all day, I'm terribly tired, and you're acting so stupid.
The kid quietly went to his room and closed the door behind him. And his father continued to stand at the door and get angry at the requests of his son. How dare he ask me about my salary, then to ask for money? But after some time, he calmed down and began to reason sensibly: Maybe he really needs to buy something very important. To hell with them, with three hundred, after all, he has never asked me for money at all. When he entered the nursery, his son was already in bed.
Are you awake, son? - he asked.
- No, dad. I'm just lying down, - the boy answered.
“I think I answered you too rudely,” said the father. - I had a hard day, and I just broke. I'm sorry. Here, keep the money you asked for.

The boy sat up in bed and smiled.
- Oh, daddy, thanks! he exclaimed happily.
Then he reached under the pillow and pulled out a few more crumpled banknotes. The father, seeing that the child already had money, got angry again. And the kid put all the money together, and carefully counted the bills, and then looked at his father again.
Why did you ask for money if you already have it? he muttered.
Because I didn't have enough. But now I just have enough, - answered the child.
- Dad, there are exactly five hundred. Can I buy one hour of your time? Please come home from work early tomorrow, I want you to have dinner with us.

Once a wise man, standing in front of his students, did the following. He took a large glass vessel and filled it to the brim with large stones. Having done this, he asked the disciples if the vessel was full. All confirmed that it is full.

Then the sage took a box of small pebbles, poured it into a vessel and gently shook it several times. Pebbles rolled into the gaps between large stones and filled them. After that, he again asked the disciples if the vessel was now full. They again confirmed - the fact is complete.

Finally, the sage took a box of sand from the table and poured it into a vessel. The sand, of course, filled the last gaps in the vessel.

“Now,” the sage addressed his disciples, “I would like you to be able to recognize your life in this vessel! Large stones represent important things in life: your family, your loved one, your health, your children - those things that, even without everything else, can still fill your life. Small stones represent less important things, such as your job, your apartment, your house, or your car. Sand symbolizes life's little things, everyday fuss. If you first fill your vessel with sand, then there will be no room for larger stones. It is the same in life: if you spend all your energy on small things, then there will be nothing left for big things. Therefore, pay attention, first of all, to important things, find time for your children and loved ones, watch your health. You still have enough time for work, for home, for celebrations and everything else. Watch your big stones - only they have a price, everything else is just sand.

In one country there lived a wise man who was happy and cheerful all his life and was never seen sad and sad. When he was old and dying, one of his disciples came to him and asked him:
- We have seen you laughing all your life, Teacher. How did you manage to not be sad and sad all your life?
The sage answered him thus:
- Once, when I was young like you, I asked my master about it. Then I was 17 years old, and I felt miserable, it seemed the whole world turned away from me.
To which I heard the following answer: "My friend! In my youth, I, like you, was just as sad. And suddenly I realized:" This is MY choice and this is MY life!!!"
Waking up every morning since then, I ask myself:
"What do you choose sadness or joy today?"
And somehow it always turns out that I CHOOSE JOY!!!

Once a very rich man gave alms to a poor man - a basket filled with dirty rags. The poor man cleaned the basket, washed it, filled it with flowers and took it to the rich man. "Why did you bring me flowers, when I gave you only rubbish?" - the rich man was amazed. "Because everyone gives what his heart is filled with," the poor man replied.

When people fight

Once the teacher asked his students:
Why do people scream when they fight?

- But why shout if the other person is next to you? the Teacher asked. Can't you talk to him quietly? Why scream if you're angry?
The students offered their answers, but none of them satisfied the Teacher. Finally he explained:
- When people are dissatisfied with each other and quarrel, their hearts move away. In order to cover this distance and hear each other, they have to shout. The more angry they are, the farther they move away and the louder they shout.
- What happens when people fall in love? They do not shout, on the contrary, they speak softly. Because their hearts are very close, and the distance between them is very small. And when they fall in love even more, what happens? continued the Teacher. – They do not speak, but only whisper and become even closer in their love.

Understand. We fight.. All the time.. We can't be together, can we?
- Do you like cherries?
- Yes.
- Do you spit out the bones when you eat it?
- Well, yes.
- So it is in life ... Learn to spit out the bones, and at the same time love the cherry!

How many kinds of friends are there? - ask the sage.
“Three,” he says.

There is a friend like food, you are looking for him every day.

There is a friend like a medicine, when you need it you are looking for it.

And there is a friend like a disease, he is always looking for you.

LOOKING INTO YOU LIKE IN A MIRROR...

Long ago, the great shah ordered the construction of a beautiful palace. In one of its halls, all the walls, the ceiling, the doors, and even the floor were made of mirrors, and every sound resounded with a booming echo. Once a dog ran into this hall and froze in amazement - a whole pack surrounded it from all sides, from above and below. The dog bared its teeth, and the reflections returned the same. Frightened in earnest, she barked desperately. The echo didn't stop. The dog darted about, biting the air, and its reflections also darted around, snapping their teeth.
The next morning, the servants found the unfortunate animal lifeless, surrounded by millions of reflections of dead dogs. There was no one in the room who could harm her in any way. The dog died fighting his own reflection. The world itself does not bring us either good or evil. He is indifferent to humans. Everything that happens around us is just a reflection of our own thoughts, feelings, desires and actions.

The world is a big mirror.

TWO MONKS.

One day, an old and a young monk were returning to their monastery. Their path was crossed by a river, which, due to the rains, overflowed very strongly.
A young woman was standing on the shore, who also needed to cross to the opposite shore, but she could not do without outside help. The vow strictly forbade the monks to touch women, and the young monk defiantly turned away from her. The old monk approached the woman, took her in his arms and carried her across the river. For the rest of the way, the monks remained silent, but at the very monastery the young monk could not stand it: "How could you touch a woman!? You made a vow!" To which the old man calmly replied: "It's strange, I carried it and left it on the river bank, and you are still carrying it."

After the wife found out about the betrayal,

her husband began to ask her for forgiveness.

The wife looked at him and said:
- Take a glass.

- Well, I took it.

“Now make him fall and see what happens to him.”
Well, he crashed.

“Now ask his forgiveness and see if he becomes whole again…”

One The old man once called his disciples

and showed them a piece of blank white paper,
in the middle of which was a black dot.
- What do you see here? the old man asked.
- Point, - answered one.
"A black dot," another confirmed.
“Fat black dot,” said the third.
And then their beloved teacher sat in a corner and wept.
"Tell us, why are you crying so bitterly?" -
the students were surprised.
- I cry about what all my students saw
just a small black dot
and none of them noticed a clean white sheet ...
How often do we judge a person only by his little flaws,
forgetting the benefits...

***

EVERYONE DECIDES HIS OWN LIFE WAY!!!

There lived two brothers. One brother was a successful man who achieved fame for his good deeds. The other brother was a killer. Before the trial of the second brother, a group of journalists surrounded him, and one asked the question: - How did it happen that you became a criminal? - I had a difficult childhood. My father drank, beat my mother and me. Who else could I be? At the same time, several journalists surrounded the first brother, and one asked: - You are known for your achievements; how did it happen that you achieved all this? - I had a difficult childhood. My father drank, beat my mother and me. Who else could I be?

One man tried his best to do as many good deeds as possible. But, everything he did, he immediately wrote down for himself in good deeds and rejoiced. And then one day he was walking down the street, and his grandmother dropped a button from her coat. He wanted to wave his hand, but then he nevertheless returned, picked up this button, gave it to his grandmother and forgot about this good deed. When he was at the judgment of God, then on the scales of his good deeds there was only one button, which outweighed all his sins. In his amazement, the angel answered him: this is your only good deed for which you forgot.

A young girl came to her father and said
- Father, I'm tired, I have such a hard life, such difficulties and problems, I always swim against the current, I have no more strength ... what should I do?
Instead of answering, my father put 3 identical pots of water on the fire, threw carrots into one, put an egg into another, and poured coffee beans into the third. After a while, he took out the carrots and the egg from the water and poured it into a cup of coffee from 3 pots.
- What changed? he asked his daughter.
- The egg and carrots are boiled, and the coffee beans are dissolved in the water - she replied.
- No, my daughter, this is only a superficial view of things. Look - hard carrots, having been in boiling water, have become soft and pliable. The fragile and liquid egg became hard. Outwardly, they did not change, they only changed their structure under the influence of the same unfavorable circumstances - boiling water. So people - strong outwardly can fall apart and become weaklings where fragile and tender only harden and get stronger ...
- What about coffee? the daughter asked
- ABOUT! This is the fun part! Coffee beans completely dissolved in a new hostile environment and changed it - they turned boiling water into a magnificent aromatic drink. There are special people who do not change due to circumstances - they change the circumstances themselves and turn them into something new and beautiful, benefiting and learning from the situation...
Rule of life.....

Parable about silence.

Several people began to somehow warmly and viciously insult the sage. He listened silently, very calmly. Because of this calmness, they somehow felt uneasy. An awkward feeling arose, and one of them turned to the sage:
- What's the matter? Do you not understand what we are saying?
- It's up to you to decide whether to insult me ​​or not, - the sage replied. - And my choice is to accept your insults or not. I just refuse to accept them. You can take them for yourself.

PARABLE "POET'S ENVY"

Once, when the elder was walking near the pond, the poet approached him and asked:

Teacher, tell me why I cannot write the same beautiful poetry as other poets. Am I less talented? Do I put less effort into it?

The teacher took a pitcher, scooped up water, poured half of it on the beautiful flowers growing on the shore of the pond, and half back into the pond, and said:

The water that has irrigated the flowers is your efforts, bearing beautiful fruits, and the water spilled into the pond is what feeds your envy. The more water poured into the pond, the less the flowers get.

One photographer came to the lady for dinner. She, looking at his photographs, exclaimed:

What wonderful photos you have! Do you have a very good camera?

The photographer was silent. But as he left, he said:

Thank you, dinner was very tasty. You must have very good pans.

PARABLE "BANK OF HONEY"
Imagine that there is a jar of honey on the table, but suddenly someone carelessly pushed it and it broke ...
What do you think is not leaking? Honey, of course, honey!
Here, dear heart, if you are filled with love, and if with
you will be treated badly, with hostility, what will pour out of your heart?
Love, and only love! Even with such a nasty and disrespectful attitude, love will pour out of your heart, but only on the condition that it is there.

Parable about condemnation.

One married couple moved to live in a new apartment.
In the morning, barely waking up, the wife looked out the window and saw a neighbor who was hanging out washed clothes to dry.
“Look how dirty her laundry is,” she said to her husband.
But he read the newspaper and did not pay any attention to it.
- She probably has bad soap, or she doesn’t know how to wash at all. She should be taught.
And so every time a neighbor hung out the laundry, the wife was surprised at how dirty it was.
One fine morning, looking out the window, she cried out:
- ABOUT! Today the linen is clean! She must have learned to wash!
- No, my husband said, - I just got up early today and washed the window.
So it is in our life! It all depends on the window through which we look at what is happening.
And before condemning others, it is necessary to think about how pure our hearts and intentions are!

One old and very wise man said to his friend: - Look at the room in which we are better, and try to remember the brown things. There was a lot of brown stuff in the room, and the friend got the job done quickly. But the wise Chinese asked him the following question: - Now close your eyes and list all the things ... blue. The friend was confused and indignant: - I didn’t notice anything blue, because I memorized, at your instruction, only brown things! To which the wise man replied: - Open your eyes, look around - there are a lot of blue things in the room. And it was absolutely true. Then the wise man continued: “If you look for only brown things in the room, and only bad things in life, then you will only see them, notice only them, and only they will be remembered and participate in your life. Remember: if you are looking for something bad, then you will definitely find it and you will never notice anything good.

Once a righteous man was talking to God and asked him: "Lord, I would like to know what is Heaven and what is Hell."

God led him to two doors, opened one and led the man inside. There was a large round table in the middle of which was a huge bowl filled with food that smelled very delicious. The man was very hungry.

The people around the table looked hungry and sick. They all looked like they were dying of hunger. They all had spoons with long, long handles attached to their hands.

They could take out a bowl filled with food and scoop up food, but since the handles of the spoons were too long, they could not carry the spoons to the courts.

The righteous man was shocked at the sight of their misfortune. God said, "You have seen Hell."

Then they went to the second door. God opened it.

The scene the man saw was identical to the previous one. There was the same huge round table, the same giant bowl that made his mouth fill with saliva. The people around the table held the same very long-handled spoons. Only this time they looked full, happy, and deep in pleasant conversations with each other.

The man was amazed: "How is this possible? I don't understand."

"It's simple," God smiled, "They learned to feed each other."

Once upon a time there was a young man with a bad temper. The father gave him a full bag of nails and said, "Hammer one nail into the garden gate every time you lose patience or get into a fight with someone." On the first day, he drove 37 nails into the gates of the garden. In the following weeks, I learned to control the number of hammered nails, reducing it from day to day: I realized that it was easier to control myself than to hammer nails. Finally, the day came when the young man did not drive a single nail into the garden gate. Then he came to his father and told him the news. Then the father said to the young man: - Take out one nail from the gate every time you do not lose your patience. Finally, the day came when the young man was able to tell his father that he pulled out all the nails. The father led his son to the garden gate: - Son, you behaved very well, but look how many holes are left on the gate! They will never be the same again. When you quarrel with someone and say unpleasant things to him, you leave him wounds like those on the gate. You can stick a knife in a person and then pull it out, but there will always be a wound, and no matter how many times you ask for forgiveness, the wound will remain. A wound brought by words causes the same pain as a physical one ...

One day I asked my teacher how to recognize a spiritual person.

And my teacher replied: “It is not what he says, and not what he seems to be, but the atmosphere that is created in his presence. That's what the evidence is. For no one is able to create an atmosphere that does not belong to his spirit.

Parable about good and evil.

One day the sage gathered his disciples and showed them an ordinary sheet of paper, where he drew a small black dot. He asked them, "What do you see?" Everyone answered in unison that a black dot. The answer was not correct. The sage said, "Don't you see this white sheet of paper - it's so huge, bigger than this black dot!" This is how it is in life - we first see something bad in people, although there is much more good. And only a few see a "white sheet of paper" at once.

Once upon a time, an old Indian revealed to his grandson one vital truth. - In every person there is a struggle, very similar to the struggle of two wolves. One wolf represents evil - envy, jealousy, regret, selfishness, ambition, lies... Another wolf represents goodness - peace, love, hope, truth, kindness, fidelity... thought for a moment and then asked:
- Which wolf wins at the end?
The old Indian smiled almost imperceptibly and replied:
- The wolf you feed always wins.

Once a student asked the Master:

How long to wait for changes for the better?

If you wait, then a long time, - answered the Master.

Once upon a time, a man wanted to denounce the old sage: he took a butterfly and placed it between his palms. “I’ll ask the old man what I have in my hands, and if he says it’s a butterfly, I’ll ask him if it’s alive or dead,” the man thought. “If he says “alive,” I will close my hands and she will die. If he says "dead", I will open my palms and she will fly away. And everyone will understand that they are listening to this old man in vain. In the presence of the whole village, he asked the old man what was in his hands. "Butterfly," replied the sage. "Is she alive or dead?" the man asked. The old man thought and replied: "Everything is in your hands!,

What's inside is what's around
– What is the point? the student asked.
“In the highest justice of the world,” answered the teacher.
- Is he fair? So many people are suffering… they are poor, they are sick, and someone gets everything without any effort….
“It’s just that everyone gets what they want from life,” the sage smiled, “life, fate is a very flexible substance and gives everyone what we really want.
- What do you say teacher? - the student jumped - how can you ... you say that all these people who go through misfortunes - they themselves want trouble?
"Sit down, you're still stupid." This world has no other choice... What's inside, then outside... If they see the world full of unhappiness - the sage fell silent - the world has no other choice... the world is merciful to everyone - it will satisfy everyone's request, it will become for a person the way he wants to see him .
Why then do people strive for misfortune? – sitting down, the student asked.
“That's our culture. The one who suffers can always complain and it will become easier. We believe that a person who has gone through a bunch of obstacles deserves something. People think that if they have had a lot of trouble, then they will be looked at as those who overcame them - with respect.
- Teacher, I myself believe that those who have gone through fire and water are worthy of respect, because I know what it is to starve and endure hardships firsthand.
- And what, we all now have to respect you for this? ...
“No, but you must show at least a modicum of respect, for I have endured more than you.
- You see, you demand respect for yourself for having a difficult life, or rather you don’t demand .... You just know that this is how it should be. So, it is the desire for respect and significance that makes people unconsciously, on a subconscious level, wish themselves misfortune, so that they would be respected later ... And what is left for the world? He fulfills, simply fulfills desires ... What is inside is what is around.

Once, a young and very beautiful girl came to the gray-haired sage all in tears:
- What should I do? she complained through her tears. - I always try to treat people kindly, not to offend anyone, to help in any way I can. And although I am friendly and affectionate with everyone, I often accept insults and bitter ridicule instead of gratitude and respect. And they are openly at odds with me. I'm not to blame for anything, and it's so unfair and insulting to tears. Advise me what to do.
The sage looked at the beauty and said with a smile:
- Strip naked and walk around the city in this form.
- Yes, you're crazy! - the beauty was indignant. - In this form, everyone will dishonor me, and God knows what else he will do with me. Then the sage opened the door and placed a mirror on the table.
- You see, - he answered, - you are afraid to appear in public, exposing your beautiful body. So why are you walking around the world with a naked soul? It's open for you, like this door. All and sundry enter your life. And if they see in your virtues, as in a mirror, a reflection of the ugliness of their vices, then they try to slander, humiliate, offend you. Not everyone has the courage to admit that someone is better than him. Unwilling to change, the vicious person is at enmity with the righteous.
- So what should I do? - asked the girl
"Come, I'll show you my garden," the elder offered.
Leading the girl through the garden, the sage said:
- I have been watering and caring for these beautiful flowers for many years. But I have never noticed how a flower bud opens, although then I enjoy the beauty and aroma of each of them. So you too, be like a flower: open your heart to people slowly, imperceptibly. Look who is worthy of being your friend and does good to you, how he pours water on a flower, and who cuts off the petals and tramples underfoot ...

Parable about feelings.

They say that once all human feelings and qualities gathered in one corner of the earth.

When BOREDOM yawned for the third time, MADNESS suggested: "Let's play hide-and-seek!?" INTRIGA raised an eyebrow: “Hide and seek? What kind of game is it??" And MADNESS explained that one of them, for example, it, drives - closes its eyes and counts to a million, while the rest are hiding. The one who is found last will drive the next time, and so on. ENTHUSIASM danced with euphoria, JOY jumped so much that it convinced DOUBT, only APATHY, which was never interested in anything, refused to participate in the game. The TRUTH chose not to hide, because in the end it is always found. PRIDE said that it was a completely stupid game (she didn’t care about anything but herself). And COANY didn't want to risk it. - One, two, three... - MADNESS started counting. LAZY hid first, she hid behind the nearest stone on the road, VERA rose to heaven, and ENVY hid in the shadow of TRIUMPH, who managed to climb to the top of the highest tree on his own. NOBILITY could not hide for a very long time, since every place it found seemed ideal for its friends: Crystal clear lake - for BEAUTY. Tree cleft - so, it's for FEAR. Butterfly wing - for voluptuousness. A breath of breeze - it's for FREEDOM! And it camouflaged itself in the sun. EGOISM, on the contrary, has found only for itself a warm and cozy place. FALSE hid in the depths of the ocean (in fact, she hid in a rainbow), and PASSION and DESIRE lurked in the mouth of a volcano. FORGETTING, I don’t even remember where she hid, but it doesn’t matter. When MADNESS counted to 999999, LOVE was still looking for somewhere to hide, but everything was already taken. But suddenly she saw a marvelous rose bush and decided to hide among its flowers. - A million, - MADNESS counted and began to search. The first one, of course, found LAZINESS. Then it heard how FAITH argues with God, and it learned about PASSION and DESIRE by the way the volcano trembles. Then MADNESS saw ENVY and guessed where TRIUMPH was hiding.
There was no need to look for EGOISM, because the place where he was hiding turned out to be a hive of bees, who decided to drive out the uninvited guest. In search of MADNESS, he came to the stream to get drunk and saw BEAUTY. DOUBT was sitting by the fence, deciding which side to hide on. So everyone was found: TALENT - in fresh and juicy grass, SORROW - in a dark cave, FALSE - in a rainbow (to be honest, she was hiding at the bottom of the ocean). But they couldn't find LOVE... MADNESS searched behind every tree, in every stream, on the top of every mountain, and finally, it decided to look in the rose bushes, and when it parted the branches, it heard a scream. Sharp thorns of roses hurt LOVE's eyes. MADNESS didn't know what to do, began to apologize, cried, prayed, asked for forgiveness and, in expiation of his guilt, promised LOVE to become her guide. And since then, when they played hide-and-seek for the first time on earth, LOVE is blind and MADNESS leads her by the hand ...

Parable about friendship and love

There were two friends. At one point they argued and one of them slapped the other.
The latter, feeling pain but saying nothing, wrote in the sand: "Today my best friend slapped me."
They kept walking and found an oasis where they decided to swim. The one who got slapped almost drowned and his friend saved him. When he came to, he wrote on a stone:
"Today my best friend saved my life."
The one who gave the slap and who saved the life of his friend asked him:
- When I offended you, you wrote on the sand, and now you write on the stone. Why?
The friend replied:
- When someone offends us, we must write it in the sand so that the winds can erase it. But when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone so that no wind can erase it from our memory.
Learn to write hurts in the sand and engrave joys in stone.

Four candles.
Four candles burned quietly and slowly melted ... It was so quiet that they could be heard talking.
The first one said:
I am Peace. "Unfortunately, people don't know how to keep me.
I think there is nothing left but to go out!"
And the candle flame went out.
The second said:
I am Vera. "Unfortunately, no one wants me.
People don't want to hear anything about me, so
there is no point in burning further."
As soon as he said this, a light breeze blew and
extinguished the candle.
Very sad, the third
candle said:
I am Love. "I don't have the strength to go on.
People do not appreciate me and do not understand.
They hate those who love them more
all - their loved ones." Without waiting for a long time, this candle
faded away.
Suddenly, a child entered the room. and saw three
extinguished candles. Frightened, he shouted:
"What are you doing?! You must be on fire!
I'm afraid of the dark!!!" Having said this, he began to cry.
The excited fourth candle said:
"Don't be afraid and don't cry! While I'm burning, you can
light the other three candles.
I am HOPE.

When people fight


Once the teacher asked his students:
Why do people scream when they fight?
“Because they lose their calm,” said one.

But why scream if the other person is next to you? the Teacher asked. Can't you talk to him quietly? Why scream if you're angry?
The students offered their answers, but none of them satisfied the Teacher. Finally he explained:
- When people are dissatisfied with each other and quarrel, their hearts move away. In order to cover this distance and hear each other, they have to shout. The more angry they are, the farther they move away and the louder they shout.
- What happens when people fall in love? They do not shout, on the contrary, they speak softly. Because their hearts are very close, and the distance between them is very small. And when they fall in love even more, what happens? continued the Teacher. – They do not speak, but only whisper and become even closer in their love.
- In the end, even whispering becomes unnecessary for them. They just look at each other and understand everything without words.

Wind and sun.

One day, the Sun and the angry North Wind started a dispute about which of them is stronger.

They argued for a long time and finally decided to measure their strength with the traveler, who at that very time was riding on horseback along the high road.

Look, - said the Wind, - how I will fall on him and tear off his cloak.

He said - and began to blow, that there was urine. The stronger the wind blew, the tighter the traveler wrapped himself up (he grumbled at the bad weather, but drove farther and farther).

The sun, seeing the impotence of its rival, smiled, looked out from behind the clouds, warmed and dried the earth, and with it the poor half-frozen traveler. Feeling the warmth of the sun's rays, he cheered up, blessed the Sun, took off his cloak himself, rolled it up and tied it to the saddle.

You see, then the meek Sun said to the angry
Wind, - with kindness and kindness you can do much more than
anger.


Parable This is such a short story with a deep meaning. Her characters are ordinary people, sometimes not very educated. Their stories and stories contain essential life lessons.

Parables have always given people a reason to think about the meaning of human life, about the role of man on earth. This is a very effective means of development, education and training. Wisdom, which is presented in a simple and clear form, teaches children to think, develops intuition and imagination, and also teaches them to find solutions to problems. Parables make children think about their behavior and sometimes laugh at their own mistakes.

These short stories will help you understand that one problem can always have several solutions and life cannot be divided into good and bad, black and white.

Parables are like seeds, once they get into the heart of a child, they will surely grow and bear fruit.

We advise children to read parables, these are the same fairy tales, only with a deep meaning. From 5-6 years old, some parables are already accessible to children, especially if you explain something to them and give examples at the same time.

When is any harbor good?

One day, a rich merchant wanted to show his son the world, introduce him to his companion from another country, and therefore took him on a journey. During the journey, the father and son stayed in very expensive hotels, the father always taught that the son demanded to be treated like a master, then he would be given the best room in the hotel, the horse - an excellent stall in the stable, and the ship - a good place in the harbor.

They traveled in their own wagon, which was drawn by two horses. One rainy day, their cart got stuck in the mud, the place was deserted. Soon it got dark and it began to rain. Father and son unharnessed their horses and were forced to ride to the nearest village. There was no hotel there and they began to knock on the houses. People, having heard an unfamiliar language, did not open the doors, but shouted something in response. So the tired wanderers went through the whole village and only the door of the very last house opened. An old lady all in rags invited them in. The merchant's son, seeing the blackened walls and ceiling, backed toward the door.

Father, let's not spend the night in such a dirty shack, - said the young man.

In a storm, any harbor is good, - his father answered him and gave the old woman a copper coin. The hostess pressed the coin to her heart and laughed.

She is so sincerely happy with a copper coin, as if it were gold, - the young man grinned.

As in a storm any harbor is good, so in poverty any coin is gold. - said the father.

Why didn't the mouse get married?

Dear mouse, will you marry me? - the brave gray mouse asked the mouse.

Well, - the mouse lowered its eyes, - but bring me something sweet as a gift.

Tomorrow I will go to the kitchen and be sure to bring you a piece of sugar. He's so sweet. - said the groom, twisting his mustache.

The next day, the brave groom climbed into the kitchen through a hole in the floor and, once under the cabinet, did not dare to get out from under it.

That same evening the mouse came to the mouse and said:

Dear mouse, I thought about it and decided to bring you a piece of candy, not sugar. Sugar is just sweet, but candy is fragrant and sweet.

I have never tried sweets before, - the mouse sighed.

The next morning, the mouse again went to the kitchen and again was afraid to get out from under the cabinet.

He again came to visit the mouse without a gift, but at the same time said:

I changed my mind about giving you sugar or candy. Tomorrow I will bring you halva. It's the tastiest treat in the world: hearty, sweet, and buttery.

You know, little mouse, I will not marry you, - the mouse said dryly.

Why? - the mouse was very surprised.

How many do not repeat the word "halva" - it will not become sweeter in the mouth.

The Parable of the Nails

Zhyl-was a quick-tempered and unrestrained young man. And then one fine day, his father gave him a bag of nails and ordered that every time he could not restrain his anger, drive one nail into the fence post.

On the first day, there were several dozen nails in the post. Then gradually he learned to control his anger, and every day the number of nails he hammered became smaller. The young man realized that it was much easier to control his anger than to drive in nails.

And then the day came when he never once lost control of himself. He told his father about it. He looked at him and said that now, when the son manages to restrain his anger, he can pull out one nail from the post.

Time passed, and a day came when the young man came to his father and said that not a single nail was left in the pillar. Then the father led his son by the hand to the post and said:

You did a good job, but look how many holes there are in the post? He will never be the same again in his life. That's when you say something evil or bad to a person, he leaves a scar, like these holes in a pillar. And no matter how many times after that you apologize, the scar will still remain with the person.

In God's Store

One woman had a dream: God himself was standing behind the counter of the store.

God! Is it real?” the woman exclaimed with joy.

Yes, it's me, said God.

What can I buy from you?” the woman decided to ask.

You can buy absolutely everything from me, - God answered.

Then please give me happiness, health, success, a lot of money and love.

God smiled at her in response and retired to the back room for everything ordered. After some time, he returned with a small paper box in his hands.

Is that all? - the disappointed woman was surprised.

Yes, that's all, - God answered. - Didn't you know that only seeds are sold in my store?

Parable about truth and lies

Three boys went into the forest. Mushrooms, berries, birds in the forest. The boys were walking. Didn't notice how the day went by. They go home - they are afraid: “It will hit us at home!” So they stopped on the road and think what is better: to lie or to tell the truth?

I will say, - says the first, - as if a wolf attacked me in the forest. The father will be frightened and will not scold.

I will say, - says the second, - that I met my grandfather. The mother will be delighted and will not scold me.

And I'll tell the truth, - says the third. - It's always easier to tell the truth, because it's the truth and you don't need to invent anything.

Here they all went home. As soon as the first boy told his father about the wolf, lo and behold, the forest watchman was coming.

No, he says, there are wolves in these places.

Father got angry. For the first guilt he got angry, and for a lie - twice.

The second one told about the grandfather, and the grandfather is right there - he is coming to visit. Mother learned the truth. For the first guilt I got angry, and for a lie - twice.

And as soon as the third boy came, he confessed everything from the threshold. Mom grumbled at him, and forgave him.

Parable "Fragile gifts"

Once a wise old man came to a village and stayed to live. He loved children and spent a lot of time with them. He also liked to give them gifts, but he gave only fragile things. No matter how hard the children tried to be neat, their new toys often broke. The children were upset and wept bitterly. Some time passed, the sage again gave them toys, but even more fragile ones.

One day, the parents could not stand it and came to him:

You are wise and wish only the best for our children. But why do you give them such gifts? They try their best, but the toys still break and the children cry. But the toys are so beautiful that it is impossible not to play with them.

Quite a few years will pass, - the old man smiled, - and someone will give them his heart. Maybe this will teach them to handle this priceless gift a little more carefully?

The fox advised the hedgehog to go to the hairdresser.

Such thorns, - she says, and licks herself, - are no longer worn. Now the hairstyle "under the turtle" is in fashion!

The hedgehog listened to the advice and went to the city.

It is good that after the fox the owl flew past him.

Then you should immediately ask yourself to refresh yourself with cucumber lotion and carrot water! “When she found out what was going on,” she said.

For what? - I did not understand the hedgehog.

And so that the fox tastes better to eat you! the owl explained. - After all, before that, your thorns interfered with her!

And only then did the hedgehog realize that not every advice, and even more so, not everyone who gives advice, can be trusted!

Parable "Dispute of the wind with the sun"

One day, the angry North Wind and the Sun started a dispute about which of them is stronger. They argued for a long time and decided to try their hand at one traveler.

The wind said: “I will immediately tear off his cloak!” And he began to blow. He blew very hard and for a long time. But the man only wrapped himself more tightly in his cloak.

Then the Sun began to warm the traveler. He first lowered his collar, then untied his belt, and then took off his cloak and carried it on his arm. The Sun said to the Wind: “You see: with kindness, affection, you can achieve much more than violence.”

The parable of the glass of water

The professor began his lesson by taking a glass with a small amount of water in his hand. He held it up so that everyone could see it and asked the students:

How much do you think this glass weighs?

The audience whispered animatedly.

- Approximately 200 grams! No, 300 grams, perhaps! Or maybe all 500! – began to be distributed answers.

“I really won't know for sure until I weigh him. But now it is not necessary. My question is this: what happens if I hold the glass like this for a few minutes?

- Nothing!

“Indeed, nothing terrible will happen,” the professor replied. - And what will happen if I hold this glass in my outstretched hand, for example, for two hours?

Your arm will start to hurt.

- No! students answered in confusion. the professor replied cheerfully. “So it is with all life's difficulties. Think about some problem for a few minutes and it will be next to you. Think about it for a few hours and it will suck you in. If you think all day, it will paralyze you.

You can think about the problem, but as a rule it does not lead to anything. Her "weight" will not decrease. Action is the only way to deal with a problem. Solve it or put it aside. There is no point in carrying heavy stones in your soul that will paralyze you.

Parable about coffee and circumstances

A young girl comes to her father and says:

Father, I am tired, I have such a hard life, such difficulties and problems, I am always swimming against the current, I have no more strength ... What should I do?
Instead of answering, my father put 3 identical pots of water on the fire, threw carrots into one, put an egg into another, and poured coffee into the third. After a while, he took out the carrots and the egg from the water and poured it into a cup of coffee from 3 pots.
No, my daughter, this is only a superficial view of things. Look: hard carrots, having been in boiling water, have become soft and pliable. The fragile and liquid egg became hard. Outwardly, they did not change, they only changed their structure under the influence of the same unfavorable circumstances - boiling water. So it is with people - the strong outwardly can fall apart and become weaklings where the fragile and tender only harden and get stronger ...

What about coffee? the daughter asked.

ABOUT! This is the fun part! Coffee beans completely dissolved in the new hostile environment and changed it - they turned boiling water into a magnificent aromatic drink.


There are special people who do not change due to circumstances - they change the circumstances themselves and turn them into something new and beautiful, deriving benefit and knowledge from the situation ...

Psychology in parables

Many believe that legends, myths, parables are only for children. This is wrong. They have something timeless. This is probably due to the fact that fairy tales and parables are more addressed to feelings, to intuition and fantasy.

Since time immemorial, people have used stories as a means of educational influence. By virtue of their amusing nature they were especially well suited for this purpose and were that spoonful of honey which sweetened and made interesting even the most bitter morality, which is not always immediately understood, sometimes it is hidden and is only a hint. Any parable carries great meaning and makes people think about many aspects of their lives and their actions.

Blind and elephant

Beyond the mountains was a large city, all the inhabitants of which were blind. Once a foreign king with his army encamped in the desert near the city. He had a huge war elephant in his army, which became famous in battles. With his very appearance, he already plunged his enemies into awe. All the inhabitants of the city were eager to find out: what is an elephant.

And here are some representatives of the society of the blind, in order to solve this problem, hastened to the royal camp. Not having the slightest idea of ​​what kind of elephants are, they began to feel the elephant from all sides. At the same time, everyone, having felt any one part, decided that now he knows everything about this creature. When they returned, they were surrounded by a crowd of impatient townspeople. Deeply ignorant, the blind longed to know the truth from those who were in error. Blind experts vied with each other about the shape of an elephant, and listened to their explanations. The one who touched the ear of the elephant said:

- An elephant is something big, wide and rough, like a carpet.

The one who felt the trunk said:

“I have true information about him. It looks like a straight hollow pipe, terrible and destructive.

“The elephant is powerful and strong, like a column,” objected a third, feeling his leg and foot.

Each felt only one of the many parts of the elephant. And everyone misunderstood it. They could not grasp the whole with their minds: after all, knowledge is not the companion of the blind. They all imagined something about the elephant, and they were all equally far from the truth. What is created by speculation does not know about the Divine. In this discipline, paths cannot be blazed with ordinary intelligence.

Hakim Sanai (1141)

How often people imagine something about themselves, about other people, about their children, and how often they are far from the truth. Out of the best of intentions and their life experience, parents think that they know their children and can make them happy. By observing the behavior of their children (“touching the ear of an elephant”), parents draw conclusions based on incomplete data and build communication with their child, based on often false conclusions. Coaches, teachers think that it is they who have an uncomplicated parental love look and their opinion is objective, but, let's think about it, are they “touching the elephant by the trunk”? At the same time, the inner world of the child, his innate features continue to be a "secret with seven seals", and he himself remains alone with his difficulties. Fortunately, it is never too late to see the light and see yourself and your child in the true light.

In order for us or our children to become a little happier, you just have to doubt your own rightness. This does not mean that we should neurotically doubt every decision we make, but think before making a decision and understand that many things, events, people may not correspond to our ideas about them. The elephant is not at all a destructive pipe and not a carpet, it is something more.

Consider that much in life is transient and the social values ​​that exist now will change over time, just as the values ​​of the past have changed. Take, for example, the banal example of currency exchange, not much time has passed since then, when it was punished. Only spiritual values ​​are unchanged, not social attitudes. In the recent past, Soviet pedagogy followed the "party course", and discipline in the classroom was expressed by complete silence and motionless folded hands on the desk. But a child with a long-term tactile memory cannot perceive and assimilate the material, being motionless. The manifestation of emotions was considered indecent, and the lesson turned into a boring lecture. And a student with a long-term emotional memory not only could not learn the material, but also received psychological trauma on the main memory channel (a person carries such traumas through his whole life if he does not work on removing them with a specialist), because the lack of emotions for children with this type of memory is psychological trauma. And how many cases when parents, having listened to the "authoritative opinion" of teachers who "touched only the elephant's leg", that their child is lazy, unorganized and simply unbearable, did not doubt the correctness of teachers or coaches and punished the child for what he led myself the best I could.

They finish school, but stereotypes of behavior remain, and a person can no longer fully use his long-term memory channel, which means living a full life. Sadly. Recent children become parents, history repeats itself, and the "city of the blind" grows. Parents grew up on the same values ​​and try to instill them in their children, who will not be successful in life, using outdated principles. Each person must himself form his own system of values, corresponding to his innate characteristics.

Here is one of many examples. A man in his forties came to us for a consultation because of constant failures at work and in his personal life. He was used all the time, his salary was underpaid, and there was no question of career growth. At home, his wife constantly reproached him for lack of independence and inability to earn money. All this brought the unfortunate to a microinfarction, and after treatment, he finally decided to turn to a psychologist. At the first consultation, we naturally touched on his relationship with his parents, and after realizing his feelings, he said: "I did not know any other way to show my love to my mother, except by becoming her victim." His mother raised him alone and was very afraid that something would happen to him: as a result, everything was forbidden to him, any initiative was punished. An adult man saw himself the way his mother saw him - helpless, weak, stupid. Having passed the diagnostics, he got to know himself and during the consultation he received individual recommendations on how to build his career and use his innate data. It's good that this happened at the age of 40, and not later.

It is unlikely that anyone would wish such a fate for their child, but many parents do it unconsciously. Think before punishing or forbidding your children to do something. It is possible that your child, the student, shows his innate characteristics, and does not deliberately bring you to the "white heat". Try to embrace the whole in your mind. Man and our idea of ​​him are far from the same, he always represents something more than we can imagine.

Lame and blind

A lame man once entered a seraglio (inn) and settled down among the other visitors.

“Because of my lameness, I am deprived of the ability to move quickly and will not be in time for the Sultan's feast,” he said to his neighbor.

The person to whom he addressed raised his head and said:

“I am also invited to the feast, but it is even more difficult for me to get there than for you, because I am blind and cannot see the way.

Then a third visitor intervened in their conversation. He said:

“The two of you have the means to achieve your goal, if you will only agree to use this means. A blind man can set out on a journey carrying a lame man on his back. You must use the blind man's feet to walk and the lame's sight to guide him.

And so the two reached the end of the journey, where a feast never seen before awaited them. On the way they stopped to rest in another seraglio. Here they met two more unfortunates who also wanted to get to the feast and could not. The blind and the lame began to explain their method to them, but one of these people was deaf and the other mute. The mute heard their explanations, but could not convey them to his friend. The deaf man could speak, but he had nothing to say.

These two did not get to the feast because at that time there was not that third person nearby who, first of all, would explain to them the peculiarity of their difficulties, and only then would suggest how to overcome this difficulty.

Ahmad Farooqi (1624)

How often do we see such a situation in pair sports - one pair works harmoniously and quickly moves towards the goal, to prizes, to fame, well, just like the “lame and blind” from the parable who have reached their goal. And the other - can not achieve the desired results. And the search for new partners, new coaches begins. But this does not always bring change for the better. It is good if one of the parents tries to become that “third person” who will try to understand the characteristics of each child, and not only his own. Even better, if the coach has extensive experience, and he will recommend parents to contact a professional psychologist* to determine the compatibility of the couple, identify problem areas, and suggest solutions. Remember that there are no universal recipes suitable for all occasions. Then many people will be able to avoid unnecessary disappointments, children will get rid of an inferiority complex, parents will stop needlessly worrying about their children (“why are other children successful, and mine are worse?”)

Very often it is a professional psychologist who becomes the “third person” who helps people overcome difficulties, explaining to them their individual abilities. And how often “well-wishers”, “having come to the feast”, try to help their friends, children, forgetting that other people have different characteristics and other difficulties, despite the fact that they also want to “get to the feast”. Of course, any of you can try to become that “third person” who can help your children, for example. Just before you tell someone how you achieved anything, try to understand if you are talking to the "deaf"? And are you trying to slip a ready-made solution first instead of explaining the features of that person?

Such situations are not uncommon - a client with a long-term visual memory got an excellent result working with drawings (art therapy, mandala therapy **), and recommends this technique to his friends as the only successful one, enthusiastically forcing his child to draw. And that one has a combined type of memory (as you remember from previous publications, a combined one is when one type activates another that carries basic information). In him, for example, auditory memory activates emotional memory, and it (emotional) is a carrier. For a child with such characteristics, art therapy will not be as effective. Many more examples could be given, but I think everything is clear.

Fans of reading books from the “Your own psychologist” series, think about whether it is appropriate to apply to yourself or your children the recommendations that worked in the case of the “lame and blind”, because you may turn out to be “deaf” or “mute”. Unfortunately, many people have the opinion that psychology is safe, and you can play psychologist. Everything is not as it might seem at first glance. The fact is that the use of different methods indiscriminately (“maybe it will help, and if not, I’ll try another”) does not go unnoticed. Some methods bring great harm to the psyche, for example, trying to help a person with a long-term tactile memory with the help of conversations is almost impossible. And if this is a child who actively moves in the classroom, and the teacher sends him to the school psychologist for behavior correction, then the results can be very sad. As a result, the psychologist, using various methods to explain to the child how wrong he is, injures his psyche, which leads to a drop in the use of memory, and, consequently, to even greater problems with learning, the emergence of an inferiority complex, and off we go.

The question arises: "What to do?" I want to help my children, friends, relatives. It is worth, first of all, to get acquainted with your own characteristics and the difficulties arising from them. Know yourself. A diagnostic study will help you with this, then there will be answers to many questions and the “road to the feast” will become easier and shorter. Get to know yourself, get to know your children for who they are, and have a happy journey!

February 2004

The material was prepared for the magazine "Dance Bulletin",
official publication of the Federation of dance sports of St. Petersburg.

* professional psychologist - a psychologist who owns different tools, i.e. different methods and applying them as necessary, taking into account the individual characteristics of the client. Naturally, a person who has completed 2-month courses cannot be considered a professional.

** mandala therapy - drawing in a circle. The phenomenon of the mandala (from Sanskrit - magic circle) has long been known in the religious practices of the East as a tool for meditation, spiritual development and initiation. In psychology, the concept of an individual mandala was introduced by K.G. Jung. He understood this symbol of integrity as a projection of conscious and unconscious manifestations of mental life.



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