Disappointment is a negatively colored emotional state caused by the collapse of hopes or expectations after the manifestation of a real picture of the world. This feeling of disappointment in connection with unfulfilled dreams or that did not live up to expectations. The higher our expectations and hopes, the greater the disappointment. Disappointment is an experience of sadness, an experience that comes with understanding what could be instead of what is real. People try to do everything in their power not to feel this feeling, in every way they try not to recognize true disappointment. This concept is one of the configurations in which the subject stops fighting for the sake of gaining what he wants.
What is disappointment
Disappointment is an emotional state after a certain situation, which will serve as a reason for realizing reality.
Disappointment in a person's life forces him to accept the truth, not having won what he wanted. Many prefer disappointment. This negative emotion allows you to continue to live in a fictional world, not to feel a difficult state of sadness, not to admit that directly inflated expectations have not been fulfilled.
Disappointment for the subject is considered one of the most difficult emotional states. In this case, the individual experiences a combination of several: sadness, anger, pain, resentment. Individually, it is much easier to deal with any of these emotions than with their combination. As a result, a person tries to avoid this psychological state a hundred times more than any other negative feelings. With disappointment comes the realization of the “end”, the collapse of everything conceived, the person does not receive the cherished, does not experience the desired.
Disappointment in simple words is the experience of sadness due to unfulfilled hopes or dreams that we ourselves place on. It is necessary to emphasize that such definitions as "disappointment" and "charm" contain the identical root "charm". But only in fairy tales there are sorcerers who cast spells. In reality, it is the subject himself, who hopes to get something that does not exist, himself creates an image of what is expected (often excessively overestimated), due to the inadequate real world. When the image collapses, disappointment sets in.
Subjects who know exactly what they want become victims of disappointment more often. A person who planned everything in advance, fantasized the outcome of his own actions or actions of the people around him, the feelings that should arise, emotions and experiences, as if enchanted himself, closed his eyes with a veil of illusions. As soon as all this collapses, then no one will certainly come, a negative feeling that everyone runs away from.
Delving into the consequences of the disappointment that has come, one should pay attention to its positive features. After all, being disappointed, a person takes off his iridescent glasses, clearly sees the world as it really is, he ceases to be deceived. The experience of the ancestors says "to live, knowing the bitter truth better than sweet lies", and experience is not one century of life. But it is worth learning to perceive life in different colors, not only like “good - bad”.
The view of disappointment for each individual is subjective, everyone has the right to condemn only himself. Man is a creature prone to the ideal, he strives to achieve it everywhere: in relationships, at work, in himself. Directly in that situation, when expectations are too important, disappointment most often occurs. As a rule, disappointment in people, especially in loved ones, is most painful.
Disappointment in a loved one is a key factor in breaking up a relationship. At the initial stage of a relationship, falling in love fascinates people. Everything seems: bright, colorful, carefree, and this is where the problem begins to emerge. This is the starting point for the development of our fantasies, how everything will proceed in the future: people begin to endow each other with “super” qualities, determine how a person should behave, how he should speak, what feelings he should show, imagine an ideal life. A certain standard of a loved one is being created, this prevents us from perceiving this kind of situation, adequately, what is really happening. A man in love is not able to notice any shortcomings, flaws in behavior, negative qualities of character, in addition, he himself tries to show only his best sides, exposing only attractive character traits. Unconsciously, partners mislead each other, as if mutually inducing "enchantments". As soon as the period comes when people begin to live together, a period of relaxation begins (to live forever in tension in order to show all the best is very difficult and destructive for oneself) and a person reveals his true appearance. This is the line behind which lies disappointment in a loved one.
How to deal with disappointment in people
As soon as a person's behavior goes beyond the established standard, the one that we created for ourselves, in which we ourselves believed, is destroyed. The experience of disappointment affects the deterioration of the psychological state of the subject. It is believed that it is the negative behavior of loved ones that becomes the starting point for the formation of disappointment, but much can be forgiven. The emerging factor will be the need to change the opinion about this person, the destruction of hopes regarding him.
Disappointment is a factor that causes a storm of various negative emotions, the prolonged manifestation of which leads to a disruption in the normal rhythm of the subject's life. As a result, there is emotional instability, loss of self-confidence. Factors that generate emotional instability that contribute to the development of disappointment can be:
- spinelessness of the subject in the period of solving important life problems. A weak-willed person, afraid to face his own, is able to substitute in any non-standard situation, cause irreparable damage;
- betrayal - the most common factor that causes disappointment. As a result, a depressive state, accompanied by serious personal changes in the subject;
- lack of self-confidence. The life position of the subject is to consider himself unworthy, incapable of attracting the attention of a partner of the opposite sex. As a result, the emergence of dependence on the opinions of others.
The level of disappointment and its consequences is directly dependent on the scale of the betrayal itself.
How to deal with the already manifest disappointment in a person? It is worth trying to answer the question why this incident occurred, why the subject should have met your expectations. Analyzing the situation from a different direction, one should take into account the personal characteristics of the subject, his behavior is entirely justified for him, the person has no idea what you fantasized and what ideal qualities you attributed to him. Views of the world can be completely different from your own values and beliefs - it is possible not to notice in couples in love.
The episodic repetition of your partner's negative actions may let you understand that the essence of what happened lies much deeper, in the depths of your own experiences and emotional states. Alternatively, it is your behavior that contributes to the occurrence of such reactions. Do not blame everyone around, analyze your own actions and desires.
If disappointment caught you by surprise, you should never accumulate negative emotions in your own inner world. Each of them must be allowed to react, to reach the stage of completion. The accumulation of negative, emotional states can lead to inevitable psychological changes that you can no longer overcome on your own. To effectively cleanse the internal state of an excess of negative emotions, you can use several simple techniques: cleansing with water (taking a shower, perhaps speaking all the negative feelings into the water), walking in the fresh air, physical exercises, developing creative ideas that you have been putting off; purchasing a pet.
Don't focus on what happened. Face the fact that what happened was inevitable and this is not the end of your existence, after that you can live, while having precious psychological experience that allows you to avoid illusory influence in the future. Focus on your goals, do not plan for the result, but keep yourself busy working towards achieving the goals as much as possible.
Stop looking up to those around you. Strive for and, do not copy the behavior of others who, in your opinion, are successful or impeccable. Wean yourself from idealizing everything that appears in your path, direct your worldview in a different direction. Disappointment helped you remove the veil from yourself, so learn to see the world with all its shortcomings, negative manifestations. Become an example for others, be the person that nature created you with all the advantages and imperfections.
Throw away all existing patterns, everyone without exception is given the opportunity to react differently to surrounding stimuli, everyone has their own individual view of the world. Do not be afraid to enter into new love relationships - the disappointment received in the past will serve as an experience for you in the present.
Disappointment in a person's life is a natural emotional state, which should not be embarrassed, moreover, be afraid. It should be remembered that time is not subject to a person, it is already impossible to change the situation of disappointment. This is not a verdict. The ability to control one's feelings, dreams and hopes, to use them rationally in relation to the desired subject, will allow one to make fewer fatal mistakes, free one from excessive illusions.
disappointment in people- a natural human reaction that occurs in response to an unfavorable stimulus. This state occurs unexpectedly and is characterized by a decrease in the general background of mood. Disappointment is manifested by a pronounced decline in strength, unwillingness to build close trusting relationships in the future, to rely on someone. A person who has experienced disappointment will seek to rely only on himself in serious matters. Why does frustration occur and how can it be overcome?
Causes
Among the common causes of disappointment, it is necessary to note the most common ones. They literally block a good relationship with others. It has been noticed that a disappointed person not only does not trust people, but also does not see prospects in himself.
Unmet expectations make us suffer in the truest sense of the word. It is very difficult for a person whose desires are not realized to regain his peace of mind. We all want what is expected of other people to be done by them exactly as they originally intended. Not having received something concrete and significant, a person often turns out to be deceived and, as a result, disappointed. There is no need to create illusions for yourself. Do not make too high demands on people. People around us are not always able to guess what we need. It is better to say directly what is important and valuable, but not to build castles in the air, not to idealize a partner.
Failure to trust often disappointing. Some people literally cannot rely on a spouse or relative. All the time, it seems unreasonably to them that they will be betrayed, set up, forced to experience negative emotions. In fact, the problem is only to learn to trust the surrounding reality and what is happening to you. Disappointment in people comes when we do not know where to move, what to pay attention to and how to proceed in the future.
Corrective action
Disappointment has a detrimental effect on the mental organization of a person. Disappointment is dangerous because it can significantly change values, create an illusory picture of the world, and make a person closed. What to do in this case?
Let go of the situation
Often we focus too much on what is happening, instead of just trying to forget about the troubles and move on with life. People seem to enjoy endlessly scrolling through their heads pictures of the past that do not bring any joy. Try to let go of the situation, make it far away from you. Recognize the fact that it was in the past, and therefore brought some experience. Now you will never repeat your mistake.
Working with self-esteem
Frustration sometimes makes us treat ourselves with prejudice. People sometimes so diligently seek out each other's shortcomings that they begin to doubt their own abilities and skills. Work on yourself, increase your self-esteem. This will allow you to attract completely different partners in the future.
The one who has experienced disappointment in people becomes cautious and prudent. He will no longer allow himself to treat others superficially and lightly. Such a person weighs everything before making a final decision.
I often heard from those who are dissatisfied with their position in the present - that the reason is not in themselves, but in the people who surround them, in the circumstances that put pressure on them, and they do not have the strength to enjoy life. Let's talk about this in more detail...
We all have experienced disappointment at least once in our lives. and people for one reason or another. Common causes of life disappointments are a sense of injustice towards us and. The first step to changing your life for the better is an objective look at what is happening and work on yourself. That is the foundation upon which to build.
Injustice
Sometimes we feel like we've been treated unfairly. Why do we think so? Because it is easiest for us to blame someone or something than to look for reasons in ourselves. This is especially difficult to do in the first minutes when you learn about certain points that are the cause of our discontent.
You need to be very reasonable in order to immediately be able to humbly accept and draw the right conclusions from any situation. Many of us do not have a sufficient level of development, but those who can at least recognize this fact are already ready to work on themselves. Those who say - why should I change, let it be better for the other to change - will be again and again in wait for disappointment in life, disappointment in the circumstances that they complain about.
“A fool can criticize, condemn and express dissatisfaction. And most fools do. But in order to understand and forgive, it is necessary to master the character and develop self-control. Dale Carnegie
This is similar to the fact that it is better to monitor your health and strengthen your immunity than to take pills, and sometimes get sick even because of ordinary situations. Rather than blame the person who sneezed on you - I think it would be more correct to strengthen your immunity, and you will not be so dependent on the circumstances that affect you and you will be less disappointed in people.
It is always necessary to strengthen the immune system and lead a healthy lifestyle. As soon as you do not comply with the regime, then immediately keep a cold. So it is in everyday life - if we do not work on ourselves, then we are not able to respond correctly in situations where pressure occurs on us. We immediately strive to express our dissatisfaction, thinking little about the causes of the circumstances, which gives rise to disappointment in life and people.
Our mind often resists and is unable to immediately admit that we are wrong, if any. We strive in every way to justify ourselves, complain about injustice and say that the reason is in another person. We are all not perfect, everyone makes mistakes, and the main thing for us is to draw the right conclusions from these situations and not repeat the same mistakes ourselves.
“You can’t humiliate a person without humiliating yourself with him” Booker Washington
In response to injustice, we have emotions that need to be thrown out. Women tend to pronounce them or express emotions in the form of crying. In men, there is an internal study of the problem or in the form of anger (if circumstances pressure him from the outside, instead of leaving him alone with himself).
The main thing is to learn how to express them correctly. You need to find someone who can accept your emotions and help you release them. For example, you need to speak out to someone - so find someone who will be able to listen to you, but at the same time will be able to give the right advice on how to proceed, and not just someone who will console you and agree with your every discontent. Since the second support option will not change your life for the better and will not reduce disappointments in life.
Do not accumulate in yourself resentment and reproaches for many years. If there are any, then you urgently need to start getting rid of them, otherwise you will not only ruin your life, but also climb into someone else's with your bitter experience and express discontent outside. You need to try to understand the deep problems of your suffering and disappointments, and not look for them on the surface. Why? Because if for so many years you have not been able to get rid of them, then you are looking in the wrong place! And believe me, this is better than complaining about your life without making any effort to change it.
expectations
Disappointments in life arise from a strong attachment to results, as our expectations are often not met. I have noticed this very often in my own life. As soon as you expect it to be so and so, you get the opposite. But if we tune in to a certain result, but do not become attached to it and are ready to accept any situation of events, simply doing what is required of us, the result in most cases will be the one we want to get in the end.
If you accept the fact that people tend to do things that we sometimes do not want, then you can not be disappointed in people. Banal, isn't it? But there are few who try to follow this. We always aim to change a loved one in the way that is “convenient” for us. But “convenient” for us does not always mean right. Think about it...
Remember, a person will not change in a short period, especially if he was one, and you want to see him completely different. We must remind ourselves of this rule from time to time. Unfortunately, it is sometimes difficult for all of us to remember this when circumstances from the outside put pressure on us. And we immediately want to change the circumstances or the person, without changing our attitude and behavior. But this only continues to generate more and more disappointments in life.
And it is worth noting that any circumstance that happens to us is not sent to us in vain. It shows us what is worth paying attention to at the moment and it is possible to make changes in our thoughts or behavior.
In order for a person to change, at least two simple rules are needed: 1) your respectful attitude towards a person; 2) if you want him to act as you wish, first begin to follow this yourself.
Let's look at an example in education. If in a family parents swear, how can a child not start using the same words? Or how a parent can wean a child from being attached to a computer and TV if he himself acts in a similar way. This results in many difficulties and disappointments in dealing with people. If you yourself do not follow what you want to teach your child, then it is unlikely that the child will act differently than you.
“The opinions that we express about others are evidence of what we ourselves are” Arturo Graf
Or, for example, a wife wants her husband to stop drinking alcohol. She will say - well, I don’t use it, let him do the same. In this case, the wife should think about what causes her husband's addiction to alcohol and why he has not changed for so many years, and their relationship is only getting worse. Perhaps she had a coldness in her heart towards him, faith in him fell and the boundaries of respect were almost erased. Then she will change little at this stage until she changes her attitude towards him. Or problems with your own self-esteem, allowing too much in your address, disrespect for yourself and personal boundaries. Become self-sufficient, learn to love yourself, and you will see as soon as your inner state changes, your outer life will also change for the better.
Frustration in life comes from expectations… We need to learn not to put high expectations on people. Concentrating heavily on this, and not getting what we deserve, we will be disappointed not only in the circumstances, but also in the person himself, thereby losing faith in his changes.
Solutions
- Do not rush to blame everyone and everything, look deep into yourself and the circumstances that happen to you and you will become less disappointed in people. Maybe they want to point you to something, maybe it's time to change something in your life.
- Try to think about why this happens, and perhaps more than once. If circumstances are repeated from time to time, then this is a reason to, and not look for reasons outside.
- If you want to speak out and you want to change circumstances for the better, then find someone who will be able to listen to you, but at the same time give the right advice on how to proceed, and not just someone who will console you and agree with your every discontent caused by disappointment in a particular person.
- Do not accumulate emotions in yourself - know how to express them correctly and cleanse yourself internally. Here are some ways to clear negativity and develop inner satisfaction:
- Cleansing with water - take a shower (preferably cool at the end) with your head, try to distract yourself from circumstances that are pressing on you and just relax.
- Fresh air - go outside and try to take a walk in a quiet, pleasant place (it's great to walk near a pond: water and fresh air have a positive effect, soothe - this is when you can calmly think about yourself and your life).
- Get rid of old unnecessary things and audit your home. Do the cleaning, and thus, bringing cleanliness and comfort in the house, you put your thoughts in order.
- Get some exercise. Yoga asanas have a positive effect on balance for the stability and balance of the mind and body.
- Listen to music for relaxation.
- Find your own ways for inspiration and develop, do not sit still - improve and you will see how your inner state will improve and disappointment in life will go away.
- Remember . If we are happy, then we pay attention to the positive around, if we are unhappy, then we focus on the negative. So, appreciate what you have, rejoice in what is given to you from above and be able to properly cope with the lessons that are given to you for personal development.
- Try not to get attached to the results, otherwise disappointments will arise in your life again and again. Set goals, do whatever is required of you, but at the same time be ready to accept any turn of events.
- By doing the right thing ourselves, we set an example for others. Starting with ourselves, we will change our environment. The main thing is to develop a full-fledged and harmonious personality, become self-sufficient and then you will not be so dependent on the circumstances that put pressure on you, then there will be much less disappointment in life and people. Appreciate the present and believe in a wonderful future!
- Symptoms of disappointment
- Solutions
How to avoid disappointment in people?
7 ways to deal with disappointment in people
Disappointment is the flip side of feeling hopeful. If you hoped for something very much, waited, believed, imagined, but over time the expectations did not come true, this is where this bitter feeling of disappointment comes.
Symptom #1: Loss of hope.
Hope is the foundation for the future. Therefore, disappointed, we lose the energy to change the situation for the better.
Symptom #2: Heightened indignation.
If we emotionally react to the events that are happening around, we condemn the people who are involved in this, this is a clear symptom of disappointment.
Symptom #3: Leaving.
Withdrawal is an attempt to step back from a soul-corroding disappointment and start over. At the same time, care can be not only in the literal sense of the word. Alcoholism, drug addiction or insanity are also types of escape from disappointment.
Symptom #4: Denial or disagreement.
This symptom is very easy to notice in dealing with people. If your partner often disagrees, argues, denies, this is a clear sign that he is disappointed in something.
Symptom #5: Suicide or murder of another person. Suicide is also a departure from solving problems and a loss of hope. Murder is frustration turned into rage.
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- Solutions
1) Do not rush to blame everyone and everything, look deep into yourself and the circumstances that happen to you and you will become less disappointed in people. Maybe they want to point you to something, maybe it's time to change something in your life.
2) Try to think about why this is happening, and perhaps more than once. If circumstances repeat themselves from time to time, then this is a reason to start with yourself, and not look for reasons outside.
3) If you want to speak out and you want to change circumstances for the better, then find someone who will be able to listen to you, but at the same time give the right advice on how to proceed, and not just someone who will console you and agree with everyone your discontent caused by disappointment in this or that person.
4) Do not accumulate emotions in yourself - know how to express them correctly and cleanse yourself internally. Here are some ways to clear negativity and develop inner satisfaction:
a) Cleansing with water - take a shower (preferably cool at the end) with your head, try to distract yourself from circumstances that are pressing on you and just relax.
b) Fresh air - go outside and try to take a walk in a quiet pleasant place (it's great to walk near a pond: water and fresh air have a positive effect, soothe - this is the time when you can calmly reflect on yourself and your life).
c) Get rid of old unnecessary things and audit your home. Do the cleaning, and thus, bringing cleanliness and comfort in the house, you put your thoughts in order.
d) Get some exercise. Yoga asanas have a positive effect on balance for the stability and balance of the mind and body.
e) Listen to some relaxing music.
f) Find your ways for inspiration and develop, do not sit still - improve and you will see how your inner state will improve and disappointment in life will go away.
5) Remember that inside - so outside. If we are happy, then we pay attention to the positive around, if we are unhappy, then we focus on the negative. So, appreciate what you have, rejoice in what is given to you from above and be able to properly cope with the lessons that are given to you for personal development.
6) Try not to get attached to the results, otherwise disappointments will arise in your life again and again. Set goals, do whatever is required of you, but at the same time be ready to accept any turn of events.
7) By doing the right thing ourselves, we set an example for others. Starting with ourselves, we will change our environment. The main thing is to develop a full-fledged and harmonious personality, become self-sufficient and then you will not be so dependent on the circumstances that put pressure on you, then there will be much less disappointment in life and people. Appreciate the present and believe in a wonderful future!
How to avoid disappointment in people?
Happy families, in which, as it seems to us, everything is fine, simply do not advertise their difficulties. In any family, in any relationship, everything is not smooth and perfect. People come together to develop together, overcome difficulties, grow. None of our loved ones and loved ones is not obliged to meet our expectations.
In order not to be strongly disappointed in people, you do not need to be strongly fascinated by them initially. Each of us should learn to be responsible first of all for ourselves! Demand from ourselves, question ourselves, accustom ourselves to healthy discipline and to such actions that we expect from others.
People often discuss their problems with others, discuss people behind their backs. But this is a big mistake! Don't talk about someone behind their back that you can't say to their face. As they say, by condemning others, we take away their sins for ourselves. It will be much more productive if you muster up the courage and honestly tell the person in the face what you expect from him and how you would like to see him.
Understatement, internal grievances often lead to depression, stress, divorce and separation. (Read). Many problems can be avoided if you just talk frankly with a loved one, talk about your fears, doubts, experiences. If people do not learn to speak, then they may completely forget the language in which they used to understand each other.
The best way to avoid disappointment in loved ones is to give them the freedom to be themselves, to accept them as they are, to realize the idea that not everything is under our control, is not written according to our script. It should allow the possibility of various options, various scenarios.
The biggest trouble is also idealization. When we idealize people, relationships, events. Remember: there is no one perfect in the world, no one is perfect. Even the most are rude and cruel. Don't place too much hope on anyone. A very important feature for any personality is self-sufficiency, independence, inner freedom. Clinging to someone or something, a person loses himself. Nothing and no one belongs to us in this world. “No attachment, no suffering” (Buddha).
7 ways to deal with disappointment in people
1) Stop idealizing people and events. Most of the disappointments are rooted in this habit.
2) Take responsibility for everything that happens to you. Every moment and turn of events is the result of your actions and way of thinking. Treat it responsibly, and do not shift the blame to others, thereby depriving yourself of your unlimited power.
3) Talk and listen. How much disappointment in people is due precisely to the fact that we do not know how to speak and, most importantly, hear. Be respectful of other people's thoughts and feelings, talk about what you expect from them, and listen carefully to their response. Do not replace their answers with the settings that were already in your head. Listen and you won't be disappointed.
4) Leave the right to others to be different from you. Realize that a different way of thinking does not mean "wrong". Accepting the possibility of the existence of different points of view, and not dividing the world into black and white, you significantly expand the boundaries of your consciousness and paint life in a variety of colors.
5) Don't dismiss your own feelings. If you feel disappointment, pain and resentment, accept it. Do not be ashamed of negative emotions, they are already there, and at this stage of life, this is normal. It's a lesson to be learned that will allow you to become better at something. Instead of dwelling on negative emotions, think about what exactly is better.
6) Complete disappointment is fraught with deep depression. Distract yourself by setting new goals and opportunities. This, again, will help the analysis of their own thoughts. For example, having realized that you are disappointed in your friends, you are disappointed in your girlfriend, you should not project emotion onto the concept of friendship in general. Look for a reason to prove it to yourself, communicate with other friends and be a real friend to others.
7) Trust people and life. If you want something, don't expect it from others, but trust them. By limiting yourself in trust, you make your life poorer.
Replace self-pity with love. These two feelings are not identical at all, the first one deprives you of strength, and the second makes you the mistress of your own life. If you sincerely love yourself, you will automatically stop placing too high hopes on others.
The material was prepared by Dilyara specifically for the site
Not a single person allows himself to be fully known, hiding vices, impartial thoughts and unpresentable character traits.
Therefore, we have to accept everyone as they seem to us, sometimes creating ideal images in our heads instead of real characters.
This inevitably leads to disappointment in people: none of them is a standard, and therefore cannot meet our expectations.
Dealing with disappointment in a loved one is not easy. This is a very painful and personal moment. The very case when the truth pricks not only the eyes, but also the heart.
However, it is possible to cope with this: many of those who are disappointed in people continue to live happily, with hope and optimism.
Important Steps on the Path to Healing
The feeling of disappointment is devastating and instills uncertainty. It leads to many negative consequences, from the loss of trust to the realization of the meaninglessness of life as such.
A person feels depressed, helpless, abandoned, unnecessary. He loses hope and faith, becomes a pessimist. 
The fact that a loved one turned out to be different is regarded as betrayal and deceit.
You forgave, believed, hoped, but nothing changed - and, finally, your eyes opened. Remember four important things:
1. Firstly, disappointment in one person, even very strong and painful, cannot affect your whole life.
Fight anger, resist the surging depression, but do not let yourself be drowned.
Crying and worrying is allowed, some tears help to let go of the situation.
Chat with friends, look for new hobbies, dance, hit a pear - any means are good when you need to get distracted.
2. Secondly, revenge is the worst way out. Pain for pain, an eye for an eye - all this is unproductive nonsense that will only aggravate your internal conflict.
3. Third, disappointment can be helpful and sobering. It gives a lesson in life psychology.
Next time you will not blindly trust the first impression, you will be more careful to open your heart. Or maybe you decide to get rid of illusions forever and learn how to evaluate people realistically?
4. Fourth, you most likely noticed for a long time that something was wrong with this person. You had doubts, suspicions, but you tried to ignore them.
There were a million prerequisites for his final bad deed, which became a critical point. So it's your fault too.
This is normal, we prefer not to notice what is unpleasant to us. Like little children who believe in Santa Claus, we hope for a miracle: maybe it seemed?
But now you have to admit that the chosen one is far from ideal, has a hundred minuses and unacceptable qualities.
Sobering up is unpleasant, a severe hangover awaits you, and it is not necessary to deal with it alone.
How to live after being disappointed in a friend
The more hopes we place on friends and loved ones, the greater the disappointment when they are not justified.
And this is the whole root of evil: like a young dreamer, you first look at the world through pink glasses, and then abruptly pull them off - and everything around seems gray and dull.
Perhaps you expected too much from a partner or girlfriend, setting the bar to the highest level in order to achieve the mythical ideal of a relationship?
Disappointed in your loved one, realizing that he is far from a fairy-tale prince, you are ready to withdraw into yourself and break all ties.
Stop: are you in a hurry? Sometimes, shaking off the sequins and sequins from a fictional ideal image, under them you can find a completely normal person. 
With complexes and vices, with an army of cockroaches, nervous tics and bad habits - but his own, beloved and dear.
Think about the reasons for this feeling - are they serious? Of course, if the guy turned out to be a maniac, an alcoholic and a fighter, you should end all relationships and forget about him as soon as possible.
But you will be surprised: some ladies are disappointed in life partners due to the fact that they are illiterate, sloppy fold underwear or smell bad after the gym.
A frank conversation helps: explain yourself to the person who caused you pain with his act. Suddenly he repents and is ready to become an ideal for the sake of your relationship?
If the disappointment is too great, the best thing you can do is forgive. Try to take this new experience as a life lesson.
Thank fate for making you stronger. And continue to believe in people - they know how to pleasantly surprise.
