The most changeable childhood just falls on the time before the start of school. Peculiarities of upbringing of children of 6-7 years are connected with this time. This age limit coincides with the preparation for school. During this period, more serious demands are made on the child in terms of behavior and diligence. It is not easy for a child to deal with this immediately. The first thing that catches the eye of adults in a six to seven year old child is a change in behavior. And these changes are not always positive. The child often has to be persuaded to perform this or that action; children at this difficult age for them are not always ready to follow clear rules and stereotypes. At the same time, by the age of six or seven, a child should already learn certain norms of behavior in society, stop being impulsive and act more rationally, deliberately.
Also at this age, the child must learn to restrain and control his emotions, suppress aggression, be able to defend his point of view through argumentation (as far as it is characteristic of children), and not through screams and whims. Also, at six and seven years old, children should have an idea of \u200b\u200bjustice, truth, friendship, mutual assistance. It turns out a solid list, starting with the word "should". But these are the realities of life. Even the relationship of a child with parents undergoes certain transformations.
A child at the age of six or seven years, as it were, learns anew to comprehend the world. And only parents can help him in this by providing the right upbringing at this age. Consider the main stages educational process in children 6-7 years old.
Relationships with peers.
At six or seven years old, children already show more interest in peers. It is important for a child to have a personal social circle that is wider than "mom and dad". This craving of a child for children like him is built on common children's interests. Children like to make friends, walk together, play together, play pranks. This is very milestone in the life of a child gradually socialized in society. Parents should carefully choose couples with children for joint communication and pastime. The child must be taught not to be afraid of new acquaintances, at the same time - to be careful, especially when communicating with adults.
The relationship of the child with the parents.
As you get closer to a new circle of friends - with friends, with peers - it may seem to parents that the child has somewhat moved away from them. Parents should not openly prevent this, express jealousy, put pressure on the child with their authority. It is important to understand that this is a completely natural process. As children grow up, one way or another, they begin to “break away” from their parents, to show their independence in this regard. But at the same time, it is very important for a child that parents, beloved adults whom he is used to unconditionally trust, are always somewhere nearby. During this period, parents should diversify the child's entertainment and educational program more, while taking an active part in all activities. You can make something together, go hiking, to the circus, to museums. The joy of joint walks only brings children and parents closer, despite any age crisis. This is how the upbringing of children 6-7 years old.
Communication with teachers, preparation for school life.
In the period of 6-7 years, an additional burden of responsibility falls on the child, unknown to him until that time. But the child needs to be psychologically brought to this, prepared at all levels - emotionally-psychologically, physically. Growing up in a preschooler, the child grows stronger mentally, physically, the horizons of his abilities gradually expand. This is natural and necessary, since in the near future the main active activity of the child will be the intellectual process.
With a gradual approach to school, the child should develop the main qualitative characteristics of the future student. The child's understanding of his responsibility is at the forefront. The task of parents when raising children 6-7 years old is to teach recently carefree kids responsibility at their level of perception. For the time being, let this concern only timely completed lessons, help around the house or with younger children, but the child on a subconscious level perceives main principle socialization is your responsibility. This will greatly help him in later life.
Many parents begin to think in advance about what it is to raise children of 6-7 years old. The growing up of a child can be compared to the climbing process of a climber to the top, at each stage of which he encounters various difficulties. The development of a child is not something gradual, smooth - it is a process accompanied by crises. The success of growing up as a whole depends on the successful overcoming of these key stages.
Since the tasks of each stage of human ascension are different, it is necessary to educate to a large extent in different ways. This does not mean that there are no common pedagogical laws equally relevant for all ages. They are. But here we will focus on the specifics of a certain age, that is, what characterizes 6 years.
Clearly enough, five years is still the age of carelessness. The most important thing for kids unconditional love mothers, the warmth and security of their family world, at home. Although already big role plays, however, life has not yet set difficult tasks for a growing person.
At the age of six, changes occur in the baby's lifestyle and in relationships with loved ones. This age is already perceived as preschool. And the school, where most children go at the age of seven, is an important stage in development, socialization, and maturation. All parents in some way change their attitude towards the child around this age.
If earlier the kid learned something imperceptibly, while playing, now they require discipline, diligence and perseverance from him. IN kindergarten systematic training begins.
If earlier attitude parents was determined by the fact that this is our baby, we love him because he is cute, obedient, but now a new motive penetrates into relationships with loved ones: exactingness, the need to comply with it.
The baby already exists not only for his family: he is being prepared for going out to Big world and want him to be successful in it. That's what it's like to raise a 6-year-old child. This is the specificity of this stage of growing up.
What is required of the child?
What does this challenge require from the baby? What does he need to get in school and beyond the education that will give him a stable position in life?
By this time, the child should already be sufficiently saturated with the love of loved ones and childish carefree happiness. In this case, he is emotionally stable and ready to move on.
That is, as always happens in development, the success of the next stage largely depends on how successful the previous periods were. Raising children 5-6 years old (and before that) provides a backlog, a kind of foundation for moving forward.
If the baby is doing well in relations with loved ones, they love him, he is happy, then he has a fulcrum with which he is able, if not to turn the world, then to a large extent change himself, his habits and attitude. What is required at each stage of growing up.
The kid should gradually learn to do not what he wants, but what he needs. This is the upbringing of a child at the age of 6, its specificity. So that the child does not perceive the need for this as something bad, negative, he must feel that he is not only being deprived of part of the childish carefree freedom that he used to enjoy, not only prevented from playing and having fun all day, but also give something extra. That something new appeared in his life, namely positive, good and pleasant for him.
Only under these two conditions: if the child is happy and, thanks to this, is ready to move on in development, and if he is not only deprived of part of his freedom, but also given something very attractive to him in return, a growing person will be able to cope with the challenge of life without any problems.
What should be given to the child?
What should a child get in return for the childish freedom partially taken away from him? Respect for adults, first of all, close people: dads, moms, grandparents, older brothers or sisters. His status in the mini-society of his family is changing.
He used to be loved, but he did not participate in the adoption important decisions. Everyone took care of him, took care of him, but he himself did not take care of anyone. Now the situation must change.
A baby needs more than just love. He also needs respect. Successes in mental development, in preparation for school, new knowledge give him the respect of close adults, increasing his importance in the family. To some extent, mom and dad need to learn a new attitude towards their child: as an adult, a worker.
This does not mean that the attitude of parents will change dramatically. It is better to do everything very gradually. But new notes appear, and they sound louder.
So gradually the baby gets used to the change in his status: he is already more considered, he is already almost a schoolboy, he is studying, some achievements, success are expected from him. And we must live up to those expectations.
It's annoying, because it's difficult. But it is also pleasant, because it gives a sense of its significance, importance, human strength, which was not there before.
This is exactly the feeling that mom and dad should instill in the child. Then everything will be fine, not without difficulties, but they will be overcome.
How to change the relationship with the child?
Is it difficult for parents to change their attitude towards their child as they grow up? There are different parents. Most parents don't have a hard time. But if for a mother (usually they have such a problem) it is very important to be everything for the baby, to be his earthly God, then the emancipation of the child becomes a difficult test for her. She herself is psychologically not ready to let him go from herself, to give him more independence. She wants to continue to patronize him, she likes him to be completely dependent on her. In this case, the mother, and hence her child, faces a difficult problem.
If the mother does not have such a complex, she just needs to realize what tasks her baby and herself face. Gotta learn to build business relationship with a new student, a future student. A 6-year-old child is gradually getting used to the new requirements for himself. At the same time, while maintaining confidence that his mother loves him not for his success in learning, but for the fact that he is her child, loves him by himself.
From whom, if not from the pope, you need to learn masculinity. The kid, realizing only his belonging to male gender, from an early age begins to copy the behavior of his father. Habits, manner of communication, clothes, hairstyle - the child absorbs all this like a sponge, so the father of a little son needs to be especially careful so that the child does not take over negative sides his behaviour. It can only seem to the father that the quarrel with the mother is between the two of them. In fact, the baby observes and remembers everything on a subconscious level.
- The second rule for a mother is to educate her son with respect for his father.
Even if the father does not devote much time to the child, you still need to talk about dad with respect: “Dad will come and fix the car”, “Dad will come and help us”… Otherwise, criticism of the father may result in the fact that the child will copy his behavior in adolescence And adult life.
- One more thing important rule- instill in your son a respectful attitude towards the female sex.
This is especially true if the kid has already gone to school, because in the class he will study together with the girls, and perhaps even sit with one of them at the same desk. The son must understand that the girl needs to be protected and helped. Such a line of behavior instills masculinity in the baby.
How to raise a boy right
Boys, unlike girls, are less assiduous and obedient. In an attempt to assert themselves, they arrange fights, pranks, and act up. If the situation gets out of control, at an older age the problems may worsen - the child may begin to smoke, be rude. To prevent this, the mother and father should take an equal part in raising a boy of 6-7 years old. Moreover, it is important to understand that maternal and paternal love have different character so a balance needs to be struck.
Let's look at examples.
In a family where mom makes decisions, and dad remains indifferent due to the fact that his initiatives are suppressed, the son will grow up spineless, and in adulthood, at best, will be completely dependent on his wife, at worst, he will not be able to tear himself away from his mother's skirt. Therefore, it is important that the father also has weight in the family, and the child sees this.
But the reverse situation.
The father is too powerful in the family. A child, suppressed by excessive paternal strictness, may grow up as an insecure person or copy his father's behavior in adulthood, i.e. show aggression in their own family.
One more example.
The child is too surrounded by the guardianship of the mother. Undoubtedly, the boy also needs love and care. But some mothers go too far, worrying until the age of 40 whether their son has eaten or put on a hat. As a result, the boy grows up as a weak and weak-willed person, unable to take responsibility for his life. Give your son more freedom and teach him to make decisions on his own from an early age.
When raising a boy of 6-7 years old, stick to the golden mean, trust, respect for each family member and warm relations.
The process of raising a child in such an atmosphere will be much easier, and it will be much easier to control the behavior of the son.
Despite important role father in raising a boy of 6-7 years old, a mother raising a baby alone can also make a real man out of him. Let such a kid communicate more with a kind neighbor whom you trust, with a grandfather, with your girlfriend's son's dad or a sports coach. Ways to introduce the child to the male world not a little.
Remember, the main thing in the psychology of raising a boy of 6-7 years old is good example to emulate. If you want to raise a smart kid, read books with him. Let the baby see how dad reads newspapers, is interested in technology - the child will also join this. If you want your child to grow up neat, keep the house in order, show by example how to fold clothes. In general, remember that the child notices everything and observes everything.
And you will learn how to properly raise a girl in our article.
At the webinar “Boiling point. Conflicts in the Family” tells how young parents deal with conflicts in the family, helps to see family quarrels from various angles and choose the most appropriate solution for their specific situation.
