Problems of young people with non-traditional orientation. Prejudice Prejudice

Sexuality does not permeate our experience to the extent that Freud intended, but hardly anyone would deny that it is nonetheless an important part of our lives. In turn, sexual orientation, which refers to what kind of sex you are physically attracted to and what kind of sexual partners you might want to have sex with, is an important part of most people's sense of identity as well. Just as we shape our vision of who we are in terms of our ethical, religious and philosophical beliefs, vocation and life goals we define who we are in our sexuality.

Determining gender identity and the relationships that go with it can be challenging for anyone living in a society as diverse as the United States, where views on gender attributes and behaviors vary and continue to be in transition. There is some compensation in this for most adolescents and young adults, for whom there is at least one aspect of gender identity that seems solid and can serve as a foothold: “I am a woman and men like me” or “I am a man and women like me.” ". In turn, this leads to meaningful acceptance and support from family and peers. However, for a small but significant minority who have discovered in themselves, in whole or in part, sexual orientation to members of the same sex, the formation of sexual identity is often associated with extreme difficulties. The realization that you are sexually and romantically attracted to members of your own sex, i.e. that you are potentially a lesbian, gay, or to some extent bisexual person, is often accompanied by experiences of your “otherness”, an intense process of self-doubt and an internal struggle for reconciling this aspect of the Self with one's overall identity as a person. In addition, as noted by many authors, gays, lesbians and bisexuals who openly admit their sexual identity face a variety of negative reactions from the dominant heterosexual majority, which can harm their psychological development.

This homophobia is deeply rooted in the United States. It is not a true phobia, and perhaps it would be better to call it a sexual prejudice, but this term continues to be used both in everyday speech and in professional publications, as well as the somewhat unfortunate definition of "homosexual". Homophobia refers to a set of strongly negative attitudes, which may include baseless fear, as well as baseless and intense hatred, disgust, anger, directed at other people only on the basis of their sexual attraction to people of their own gender. Family, peers, and society as a whole often show undeniable contempt for people who openly display such an orientation, shun them, condemn them for immorality, and discriminate against them. For example, in one California City Massive Survey of Gays, Lesbians, and Bisexuals,1 it was found that about one in four men and one in five women had experienced hate harassment and offenses in the year prior to the survey. For example, they include such aggressive actions as verbal abuse, abuse, harassment, throwing objects at them or spitting, trying to push, hit. About cases more abuse, including beatings and murders, we regularly learn from the media.

Obviously, it should not be assumed that all or even most heterosexuals in the US are infected with homophobia. We do not know the extent of its prevalence. Also, do not assume that homophobia and other forms of sexual prejudice and discrimination refer to a strictly defined segment of the heterosexual population, such as the undereducated or unenlightened people. For example, one study found significant sexual prejudice among second-year medical students, 9% of whom agreed with the outdated notion that homosexuality is mental disorder(it was removed from the classification of mental illness more than 30 years ago). The APA's 44th District Committee on Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Issues Joint Group, in establishing guidelines for psychotherapy with lesbian, gay, and bisexual clients, highlighted the existence of numerous studies pointing to a "heterosexual" trend among clinical psychologists and other therapists. Moreover, the need for clear guidelines is self-evident, and the existence of such biases is all the more surprising given the high priority the APA has generally placed on egalitarian issues for decades.

Other authors have pointed out that although recently in the textbooks of psychology and sociology homosexuality is not defined as a disorder, in many cases this happens implicitly, due to the very manner in which the problem is discussed. In the general population, there is only one regularly observed factor associated with sexual prejudice: in all likelihood, heterosexual men have more negative attitudes towards people who are sexually oriented towards members of their sex than heterosexual women, especially when we are talking about gays.

How it affects the development of adolescents and young adults. One of the problems is that teenagers with non-traditional sexual orientation hide it from everyone except close friends or partners. Perhaps they are going to report it later, in early adulthood in college or in an urban setting. During this period, they also face negative attitudes and rejection, but seem to find comradely support among peers who experience the same problems, as well as among many heterosexuals who are not infected with homophobia. Undoubtedly, some of them are revealed only to the closest friends, and not to the general public. This is most likely if they choose a field of activity where many employees openly show homophobia.

WITHOUT PREJUDICE

WITHOUT PREJUDICE

(without prejudice) Words which are written at the beginning of a document or letter and mean that nothing written below can in any way be used to the detriment of an existing right or requirement, cannot be considered as the last word of the person signing the document does not oblige the signatory to anything and cannot serve as evidence in court. For example, a lawyer might write these words when he is writing a settlement proposal on behalf of his client, implying that his client can withdraw his proposal. In addition, these words mean that although in this particular case an agreement can be reached on the terms formulated in the document, the person signing it does not consider himself obliged to resolve other similar disputes on the same terms.

Finance. Dictionary. 2nd ed. - M.: "INFRA-M", Publishing house "Ves Mir". Brian Butler, Brian Johnson, Graham Sidwell et al. Osadchaya I.M.. 2000 .

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Due to the hostility of society and prejudice, prejudice against homosexuality, many young people (I mean adolescence) are confused by their sexuality, lack of self-esteem and associated alienation and isolation. According to the periodization of the process of formation of homosexual identity, which was put forward by the American sociologist Richard Troyden, adolescence and the beginning of adolescence is the most dramatic and psychologically intense stage of development. This is a period of doubt and mixed identity, when a teenager is already thinking about his sexual identity, but cannot yet clearly define it. Experiences of the first homosexual contact, self-awareness of one's homosexuality, according to various studies, on average, fall precisely at the age of 12-16 years. Studies by the British Medical Association have shown that before the age of 16, human sexuality is already fully formed.

However, for many adolescents, even having a homosexual experience and being aware of their homosexuality does not mean that they recognize themselves as gay or lesbian. Some of them turn to a psychotherapist for help in the hope of getting rid of their homoerotic orientation, others are engaged in self-education, eradicating such feelings in themselves. How? With the help of mental self-defense, the methods of which are different:

Activation or, conversely, avoidance of communication, including sexual, with persons of the opposite sex;

· Evasion from receiving any information that could confirm fears about their homosexuality, unwillingness to hear anything on this topic;

· Making fun of one's homoeroticism and persecuting one's own kind in the hope of hiding behind a wall of hatred;

Avoiding painful problems with the help of alcohol and drugs;

· Definition of unacceptable feelings and actions as accidental, temporary or peripheral.

The teenager is not prepared for such a sudden intrusion of sexuality into his psyche, and the natural reaction is often something like shock. Psychological disturbances, which, as a rule, can follow this, are therefore not pathological (V. Frankl). According to I. Kohn, "homosexual adolescents and young men need psychiatric and psychological help, but not because they are sick, but because they are in a very difficult situation, which only a specialist can understand." . I would connect this categorical "only" with the fact that many people (social workers, psychologists, employees of lesbian gay organizations) that young homosexuals turn to do not know about the rules and restrictions that exist in psychological practice in order to reduce the risk of harm to the person who applied.Therefore, I would like to acquaint you with recommendations for professionals who work with young gays and lesbians, based on the materials of the American organizations P-FLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays ) , WAF (We are Family) , the works of I. Kohn, as well as on my own observations.

Advice for professionals who work with young gay and lesbian (homo- and pre-gay)

1. Don't be surprised when young people come out to you. They probably tested you with a few "trial balloons" before contacting you. Based on your previous reactions, they have decided that you are the right person to trust. A teenager does not reveal himself to everyone at once, often he simply has no one to reveal himself to, because he does not trust anyone. Usually, the first confidant is his/her same-sex peer, the second is the mother, and the father, as a rule, is never revealed. He may come to you, having already realized his homodirection and having accepted himself, or he may turn in an attempt to find the answer to the question: "Who am I?".

2. Keep confidentiality. If young people have shared information with you about his or her sexual orientation, you have received a trust that must be respected. Violation of this confidentiality often leads to suicide.

3. Understand the meaning of sexual orientation. Every kind of sexual orientation is something that comes naturally to that person. And it's not about sexual preference. People don't choose to be gay or lesbian; they just are.

4. Be supportive. Explain that many young people have struggled with this issue before. It is necessary to give objective and accurate information about everything that worries young man experience of other boys and girls with similar problems is especially important. Agree that dealing with one sexuality is hard. Avoid easy and quick answers regarding this topic. Leave doors open for more conversation and more help.

Do not forget about family conditions, help the teenager understand his relationship with his parents, if possible - talk to them, but only with the consent of the teenager himself. If he wants to open himself up to his parents, but does not know how to do it, introduce him to the recommendations of the American psychologists of the P-FLAG organization, based on many years of research, and devoted to the following questions: "How to open up to your parents", "What stages do parents go through on the way understanding and acceptance of your child "(At the school on this topic there is" Letter to the mother who found out about her son's orientation "and" Coming Out "). It is very important that he is aware of those psychological problems that parents may encounter when they learn of his/her homosexuality. After all, it is difficult to be a philosopher in relation to own child. Relationships can only be established if there is patience, understanding and mutual honesty on both sides.

5. Help but don't push. Whatever the counselor's own sexual orientation may be, it should be based primarily on life problems teenager sitting in front of him. You cannot and cannot decide whether or not he should be gay or lesbian. The keys to how you can help will come from the youngest person. Don't squeeze him or her into the narrow confines of your own limited, like any other person, ideas - this will make it easier for you to understand the teenager and find exactly his unique solution to his unique situation.

Problem teenagers must be accepted as they are, without moralizing or intimidating. It is not the job of the counselor to change or reinforce the adolescent's sexual orientation. It is necessary to help him understand and clarify his feelings.

Most importantly, deal with feelings. Most young gays and lesbians feel lonely, scared and guilty. You can listen to them, thus giving you the opportunity to release feelings and thoughts that often conflict with each other. Be prepared for the fact that you will encounter confusion and confusion. They must work with own feelings and try to understand yourself.

The first was brutal murder in April of this year, our colleague and LGBTI activist Khulhaz Mannan, who worked for the US Agency for International Development in Bangladesh. His death was a testament to the ongoing harassment and discrimination against the LGBTI community in all parts of the world. We must strive to build a world where all people can assert their rights without fear of retribution. Unfortunately, Hulhaz Mannan lived in a different world. To make such a world a reality, the US State Department continues to fight against bias-based violence against members of the LGBTI community, including by working with employees law enforcement in many countries.

The second event was a letter I received from an American eighth grader. She said that she "wants to make this world a better place" and expressed concern about the attitude towards the LGBTI community in Russia. I can't find the words to express how much I was shocked by the sympathy of this girl.to unknown people on the other side the globe. Referring to polls that show that a significant number of Russians do not want to associate with homosexuals, she said that, "There is nothing abnormal about someone being LGBT. These people are not sick - they just fall in love with someone alone sex with them." I cannot but agree with this. At the end of her letter, this aspiring human rights activist suggests that I "consider the possibility of appealing to Russians to accept the LGBT community." I promise her and all of you that I will continue to support thisidea.

In Moscow, my colleagues and I regularly address LGBTI issues as part of our human rights work. We are particularly concerned that the government is using a law that prohibits gay propaganda to minors in order to deprive this community of the rights to freedom of assembly and freedom of speech. I was also uncomfortably surprised by the draft law against the public statement of non-traditional sexual orientation, and I breathed a sigh of relief when this bill was defeated. We call on the authorities in all countries not to make any exceptions in ensuring the human rights of all citizens.

While we celebrate LGBTI month in June, our commitment to human rights is not transitory. We always strive to respect the fundamental rights, beliefs and dignity of the individual.

I look forward to further engagement with Russians on the issue of LGBTI rights. More detailed information about the work of the State Department and the US Embassy in Russia in this area can be found at the following links:

http://www.state.gov/j/drl/
https://twitter.com/USEmbRu
https://www.facebook.com/russia.usembassy

Taking Pride in “Pride Month”

I am happy to inaugurate U.S. Mission Russia’s celebration of LGBTI Pride Month 2016 together with other posts around the world. Throughout the Pride Month of June, we once again declare that we stand for the human rights and dignity of every person regardless of who they are or who they love. This message is a strong and powerful one: it is a message of respect and acceptance. Though we acknowledge this is not always easy, and has not been throughout our own history, we all must always keep moving forward towards our shared goal of justice and equality for all. Recently, two events have really brought home for me the importance of defending LGBTI rights.

The first was the vicious murder of USAID colleague and LGBTI activist Xulhaz Mannan in Bangladesh in April. Xulhaz's death was evidence of the ongoing stigma and discrimination facing the LGBTI community in all parts of the world. We must strive to live in a world where all people can advocate for their human rights without fear of retribution. Sadly, Xulhaz didn't live in such a world. To help ensure that others may, the State Department continues to work to reduce bias-motivated violence targeting LGBTI persons, including by working with law enforcement officials in many countries.

The second event was a letter I received from an eighth-grader in the United States who was “interested in making the world a better place” and wrote me with her concerns regarding the treatment of the LGBTI community in Russia. I cannot tell you how impressed I was by this young woman’s empathy for an unknown group of people halfway around the globe. Citing polls that show a significant number of Russians do not wish to socialize with homosexuals, she argued that, “There is nothing abnormal about being LGBT. People do not have a disease; they are just falling in love with someone of the same gender.” I couldn't agree more. This budding human rights advocate concluded her letter by requesting that I “consider talking to the Russian people about accepting LGBT people.” I can ensure her and all of you that I will continue to espouse our message of acceptance.

Here in Moscow, my colleagues and I engage with the LGBTI community regularly as part of our efforts to see their rights respected. We have been especially concerned with the government’s use of the law banning “propagandizing” non-traditional sexual orientations to minors in order to deprive this community of its rights to assembly and free speech. I was also appalled by the proposed law against “coming out” in public and relieved when it did not pass. We call on authorities in all countries to make no exceptions in guaranteeing the human rights of all persons.

While we celebrate June as Pride Month, our commitment to this cause is not temporary or passing. This is an everlasting commitment to inclusion, respect, and the fundamental beliefs of human rights and dignity.

I look forward to continued engagement with the Russian people on the issue of LGBTI rights, and you can find more information about State Department and Mission Russia efforts on this front by following the links below.

Prejudice as a personality trait is a tendency to have an initially biased, biased, usually negative opinion about someone or something, to which a person draws all his subsequent conclusions.

One Buddhist master read to his students lovely text which touched everyone. The disciples immediately asked, "Who wrote it?" - If I say that this is the Buddha, you will revere the text, lay flowers on it every morning and bow. If I say that this text was written by a patriarch, you will feel great reverence, but you will no longer bow before him as before the text of the Buddha. If I say that the author was a monk, you will probably be confused. And if you find out that the text was written by our cook, you will just laugh, - the teacher answered.

Prejudice is a belief that makes it difficult to adequately perceive the realities. Prejudice - indifference to facts, arguments, arguments. Prejudice is the lack of logic in justifying one's assessment of another person. Psychologists have found that prejudice is unusually persistent, because it maintains itself. After a person mentally creates a rationale for his idea, he parted with it with great difficulty. Prejudices are extremely difficult to change using ordinary rules of logic or rational thinking: a person is not inclined to notice what is contrary to his belief system. Conclusions can live their own own life even if the facts on which they were based have already been refuted.

Prejudice drives the company with prejudice, prejudice, partiality, and tendentiousness. Having such an environment, she becomes prone to biased, biased, one-sided, deliberate distortion of reality and upholding it in the eyes of others; predisposed to biased coverage of events, facts; seeks to insist on his vision of the problem, the manifestation of his personal preferences contrary to objective reality.

Once a girl brought her fiancé home to meet her parents. The groom did not like the father right from the doorway. When they sat down to dinner, the future father-in-law filled up the young man with all sorts of questions. From the answers, it was clear that the father was nitpicking in vain. However, he did not let up and asked the last simple question: - What party do you belong to? - I'm non-partisan, - the guy answered. - Here! I thought so! - perked up the father. - When I was young, I had a dog. Non-party people stole it from the yard and ate it! Since then, I do not like non-partisans!

Prejudice is often the result of disrespect and hostility. If a person initially does not respect you before the meeting (heard enough gossip, slander), he will be biased towards you, that is, he will perceive everything that you say with skepticism or frivolity. Initial skepticism, prejudice appears.

Prejudice is the rebellion of the rebellious ego against the ego of the person opposite. Even shoot yourself, but you can’t prove anything to a prejudiced person. He understands everything, but does not accept. Maybe he doesn’t like your face or some habits cause hostility? No matter what arguments and arguments you bring, everything is in vain. Silent wall. An impenetrable shield of skepticism. Most of the time talking is pointless. Prejudice is virtually unchangeable.

On a summer night, all the members of the family slept in the garden on the roof of the house. The mother saw that the daughter-in-law, whom she was forced to endure against her will, and the son were sleeping, closely clinging to each other. It was beyond her powers to look at it. She woke the sleepers and shouted: - How can you snuggle up so tightly to each other in such heat? It's bad for health. In another corner of the garden, her daughter was sleeping with her beloved son-in-law. They lay at a distance of at least one step from each other. Mother carefully woke them both and whispered: - My dear, why in such a cold you lie apart, instead of warming each other? These words were heard by the daughter-in-law. She stood up and loudly, like a prayer, said: - How almighty is God! There is one garden on the roof, and what a different climate it has.

Philosopher Vyacheslav Ruzov writes in the context of prejudice: “Prejudice is aggressive black-and-white thinking. Nothing can be done with prejudice. Such a person finds the enemy in advance, goes to fight him in advance, and it is actually impossible to oppose anything, only to somehow endure the situation. In the practice of communication, there is one way that allows you to slightly reduce prejudice. To do this, it is necessary to eliminate the polarity of thinking, to leave such words as “ours” - “yours”, “ours” - “alien”, “black” - “white”. Use "we", "us". We all. All of us, etc. That is, these are generalizing words. However, this does not work on a truly prejudiced person. If we get to communicate with such a person, with obvious prejudices, he just starts to get mad when he hears such generalizations. It just annoys him. He jumps up and shouts: "Why are you speaking for all of us?" You only speak for yourself, why are you for all of us?! What's happened? You are zombifying us all. It's only you who think so, we don't think so. That is, you need to be very friendly with nervous people. Well, the man is nervous. Someone had already instilled some kind of prejudice in him. You have to be very friendly. You can't get caught up in a person's nervousness. You can't answer the same. You can't stand on the same platform. It is necessary to behave compassionately and mercifully, realizing that a person is in the heat of his prejudice.

Two Catholic diggers were working near brothel when they saw that a rabbi had slipped into the house of brothel. What else can you expect from him! workers exchanged glances. Some time later, a Protestant pastor stalked in as well. This no longer surprised them. What else can you expect from him! A little later, with his collar up high, a Catholic priest slipped into the house. - Horrible! One of the girls must have gotten sick.

Petr Kovalev