Who said it doesn't kill us. "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger"

These wonderful words were once said by Friedrich Nietzsche, and in the new article I really want to look at this phrase with psychological point vision. What doesn't kill us? Probably something heavy, painful, catastrophic, which brings great frustration, but at the same time leaves us physically fully functioning. Why does this something "make us stronger"? Oddly enough, it negative situations to a greater extent than positive ones lead to a very serious leap in the spiritual development of a person and can provoke significant changes in his worldview. There are cases when unexpected difficult events changed the course of people's lives. For example, a person lives by inertia, almost without thinking, every day is similar to the previous one, and everything is in order, but suddenly - an accident, he miraculously avoids death in terrible accident. Such a global loosening of the entire system can lead to questions about the meaning of life, true desires and much more. As a result, thoughts can lead to interesting changes when people change their lifestyle, vocation, value priorities. But of course, at a time when it hurts, it's hard, it's scary, we hardly think about the prospects for positive changes.
It can be noted that for each person this “does not kill” is completely different - for someone it is a serious illness, for someone it is a failure at work, for a third it is a scratch on the car. Everyone has their own threshold of sensitivity - someone does not tolerate injections, and someone can withstand the operation without anesthesia, this is an example of physical manifestations. What about soulful ones? Why are we sensitive to one and insensitive to another, why is one a difficult situation makes us depressed, and the other one we cope with easily? The point is that every person has pain points”, especially one can speak about them obviously if the reaction to the situation is disproportionately greater than the occasion is worth it. For example, you call a person, and he replies that he cannot speak yet and quickly hangs up - and you feel offended; or you were late for a meeting with a person, and he regarded it as an insult and made a scandal for you, etc. There are a lot of such examples, and we ourselves often do not notice this disproportion, the inconsistency of the reaction of the situation. For one, it would seem that nothing terrible happened, but for the other - this is a whole tragedy. Why is that? It's all about the structure of our personality, character, attitudes. In moments when it’s hard for us mentally, even though we understand with our mind that the reason is almost insignificant and even trifling, it’s worth thinking about what inside prevents us from experiencing this event on a more optimistic wave? This does not mean that you need to pretend that everything is fine, on the contrary, if, for example, you feel offended, you should cry, get comfort. Feelings are better not to suppress, because it will require a lot of strength and energy. But you can try to understand why you feel so bad, painful and painful.
Exercise: Remember a similar event in your life and try to “get involved” in the sensations, in that state. What does the body feel, what thoughts, experiences, associations, events from past experience with similar sensations do you have, what is remembered? Try to sit down and reflect all this on a piece of paper or say what torments you. Release for a while the voice of reason, which says that all this is nonsense, and you worry in vain.
By engaging in your experience, you can discover quite a few unexpected things about yourself if you are open to your feelings.

When a “black streak” begins in life, many fall into depression, thereby further exacerbating the current situation. Submitting to circumstances, they seem to recognize in advance that they have lost. And they don’t even try to find a way out, deciding that there’s nothing to be done anyway. Such thoughts are the first sign of weakness. You need to fight in any case, no matter what trials life has prepared.

You don’t need to set yourself up for bad things, but you also don’t need to expect only gifts from life. Any circumstances should be perceived as an experience that forms an attitude towards the surrounding reality.

Do not count on the help and support of loved ones. Yes, when there are sympathetic people around, it is easier to survive troubles. On the other hand, this is also a step backwards. Support, words of comfort very often give rise to feelings of self-pity. They rarely motivate to take decisive action. The words of loved ones have a calming effect, and there is a desire to come to terms with the situation, and not overcome it. That's why it's often more beneficial to try to figure things out on your own. Of course, don't hesitate to ask for help. But also count on her, accusing others of indifference, too. Perhaps the self-elimination of loved ones from solving your problems is the first step towards the beginning of a new, brighter and rich life which you will manage yourself.

Don't blame yourself for all problems. Self-digging is the first step to deep depression. It is better to direct energy to find a way out of the current unpleasant situation.

Why life's difficulties make people stronger

Not everyone who has experienced unpleasant events is able to become stronger. Many “break down”, start drinking alcohol to forget. This is the path to the bottom. Intoxication only temporarily relieves problems, makes you stop thinking about them. But it doesn't solve them. Troubles accumulate, “wind up” on each other, and every day it becomes more and more difficult to find a way out. That is why it is necessary to deal with difficult circumstances as soon as they appear. Think about solving problems, look for ways to overcome them, and not hide from them. Only such behavior can turn a person into a strong whole personality. And the sooner this happens, the easier it will be to live on. Minor troubles that previously seemed insoluble will simply cease to be noticed. And major problems will be perceived not as tragedies, but as another way to show their best qualities and get new experience.

Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche ( Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche; - ) - , representative . He subjected to cutting, and his time and developed own theory. Nietzsche was more of a literary than an academic philosopher, and his writings are of character. Nietzsche's philosophy had a great influence on the formation of and, and also became very popular in literary and circles. The interpretation of his works is quite difficult and still causes a lot of controversy.

Biography

Philosophy

Nietzsche's philosophy is not organized into a system. Nietzsche considered the “will to the system” unscrupulous. His research covers all possible issues of philosophy, religion, ethics, psychology, sociology, etc. Inheriting thought, Nietzsche opposes his philosophy to the classical tradition of rationality, questioning and questioning all the “evidence” of reason. Most Interest Nietzsche raises questions of morality, "a reassessment of all values." Nietzsche was one of the first to question the unity of the subject, the causality of will, truth as the unified foundation of the world, the possibility of a rational justification of actions. His metaphorical, aphoristic presentation of his views earned him the fame of a great stylist. However, an aphorism for Nietzsche is not just a style, but a philosophical attitude - not to give definitive answers, but to create a tension of thought, to enable the reader himself to "resolve" the paradoxes of thought that arise.

Nietzsche refines Schopenhauer's "will to live" as the "will to power", since life is nothing but the desire to expand one's power. However, Nietzsche criticizes Schopenhauer for his negative attitude towards life. Considering the entire culture of mankind as a way in which a person adapts to life, Nietzsche proceeds from the primacy of the self-affirmation of life, its abundance and fullness. In this sense, any religion and philosophy should glorify life in all its manifestations, and everything that denies life, its self-affirmation, is worthy of death. Nietzsche considered Christianity to be such a great negation of life. Nietzsche was the first to declare that "there are no moral phenomena, there is only a moral interpretation of phenomena", thus exposing all moral propositions. According to Nietzsche, healthy morality should glorify and strengthen life, its will to power. Any other morality is decadent, it is a symptom of illness, decadence. Mankind instinctively uses morality in order to achieve its goal - the goal of expanding its power. The question is not whether morality is true, but whether it serves its purpose. We observe such a “pragmatic” formulation of the question in Nietzsche in relation to philosophy and culture in general. Nietzsche advocates the arrival of such "free minds" who will set themselves conscious goals for the "improvement" of humanity, whose minds will no longer be "drugged" by any morality, by any restrictions. Such a “supermoral”, “beyond good and evil” person Nietzsche calls “superman”.

With regard to knowledge, the “will to truth”, Nietzsche again takes his “pragmatic” approach, asking “why do we need truth?” For the purposes of life, truth is not needed, rather an illusion, self-deception leads humanity to its goal - self-improvement in the sense of expanding the will to power. But "free minds", the elect, must know the truth in order to be able to control this movement. These chosen ones, the immoralists of humanity, the creators of values, must know the reasons for their actions, give an account of their goals and means. Nietzsche devotes many of his works to this "school" of free minds.

Mythology

The figurativeness and metaphorical nature of Nietzsche's works allows us to single out a certain mythology in him:

• Nietzsche proceeds from the duality () of culture, where the beginnings and begin to fight. Apollo (Greek god of light) symbolizes order and harmony, and Dionysus (Greek god of winemaking) - darkness, chaos and excess of power. These beginnings are not equal. The dark god is ancient. Strength brings order, Dionysus gives birth to Apollo. The Dionysian will (der Wille - in Germanic languages ​​\u200b\u200bmeans desire) always turns out to be will to power is an interpretation of the ontological basis of being. Nietzsche was similarly influenced. The whole course of evolution and the struggle for survival ( struggle for existence) is nothing but a manifestation of this will to power. The sick and weak must perish, and the strongest must win. Hence Nietzsche: “Push him who is falling!”, which should be understood not in the simplified sense that one should not help one’s neighbor, but that the most effective help to one’s neighbor is to enable him to reach an extreme, in which he can rely only on his survival instincts. to be reborn or perish from there. This shows Nietzsche's faith in life, in its possibility of self-rebirth and resistance to everything fatal. "What doesn't kill us makes us stronger!"
• Just as man originated from the ape, so as a result of this struggle, man must evolve into (Übermensch). and all so-called. spiritual values ​​are just a tool to achieve dominance. Therefore, the superman is different from ordinary people above all, an unshakable will. This is more of a genius or a rebel than a ruler or a hero. The true superman is the destroyer of old values ​​and the creator of new ones. He rules not over the herd, but over entire generations. However, the will has no forward movement. Its main enemies are its own manifestations, what Marx called the force of alienation of the spirit. The only shackles strong-willed person are his own promises. By creating new values, the superman generates culture - or Spirit of Gravity, like ice, fettering the river of will. Therefore, a new superman must come -. It does not destroy old values. They have exhausted themselves, for, says Nietzsche, he is dead. The era of the European has come, to overcome which the Antichrist must create new values. He will oppose the humble and envious morality of slaves the morality of the gentlemen. However, then a new Dragon will be born and a new superman will come. So it will be to infinity, for in this is manifested eternal return. One of the basic concepts in Nietzsche's philosophy is decadence ().

Quotes

“The “goal”, “necessity” quite often turns out to be only a plausible pretext, an additional self-blinding of vanity, which does not want to admit that the ship follows the current in which it hit by accident"

“... As if the values ​​are hidden in things and the whole point is to master them!”

“Oh, how comfortable you are! You have the law and the evil eye on him who only thinks against the law. We are free - what do you know about the torment of responsibility in relation to yourself!

“Our entire sociology knows no other instinct than the instinct of the herd, i.e. summed zeros - where each zero has "equal rights", where it is considered a virtue to be a zero ... "

“Virtue is refuted if you ask, “why?”…”

“If you want to get high, use your own legs! Do not allow yourself to be carried, do not sit on other people's shoulders and heads!

“If you look into the abyss for a long time, the abyss will begin to peer into you”

“There are two kinds of loneliness. For one, loneliness is the flight of the sick, for the other it is the flight from the sick.

"There are two ways to save you from suffering: quick death and lasting love"

“Every slightest step in the field of free thinking and personally shaped life is always won at the cost of spiritual and physical torment”

"A critique of modern philosophy: the fallacy of the starting point that there are "facts of consciousness" - that there is no place for phenomenalism in the field of self-observation"

“He who is attacked by his time is not yet sufficiently ahead of him - or behind him”

“We are the heirs of the vivisection of conscience and self-crucifixion that took place over two millennia.”

“Alone with ourselves, we imagine everyone more ingenuous than ourselves: in this way we give ourselves rest from our neighbors”

“Nothing is bought for a greater price than a particle of human reason and freedom…”

“Nothing strikes so deeply, nothing destroys so much as an “impersonal duty,” as a sacrifice to the moloch of abstraction ...

"He who knows himself is his own executioner"

“The same thing happens to a person as to a tree. The more he aspires upward, towards the light, the deeper his roots go into the earth, down, into darkness and depth - to evil.

"Death is close enough to not be afraid of life"

“Man has little by little become a fantastic animal, which, more than any other animal, strives to justify the condition of existence: a man must at times seem to know why he exists, his breed cannot succeed without periodic trust in life, without faith in the reason inherent in life"

“Man prefers to desire non-existence than not to desire at all”

“Humanity is more of a means than an end. Humanity is just experimental material"

“In order for moral values ​​to achieve dominance, they must rely solely on forces and affects of an immoral nature.”

“I don’t run from the proximity of people: just the distance, the eternal distance that lies between man and man, drives me into loneliness”

“... But what convinces does not yet become true: it is only convincing. Note for donkeys."

• "God is dead" (This phrase is found in the work "Thus Spoke Zarathustra")

• "God is dead; because of his compassion for people, God died” (“Thus Spoke Zarathustra”, chapter “On the Compassionate”)

• “God himself cannot exist without wise people“, - said Luther, and with every right; but “God can exist even less without stupid people” - Luther did not say this!

• “If God wanted to become an object of love, then he should first renounce the position of a judge who administers justice: a judge, and even a merciful judge, is not an object of love”

• “An evil god is needed no less than a good one - after all, you owe your own existence by no means to tolerance and philanthropy ... What is the use of a god who knows no anger, envy, cunning, mockery, revenge and violence?”

• “Without the dogmas of faith, no one could live even a moment! But these dogmas have by no means been proved by this. Life is not an argument at all; among the conditions of life could be delusion"

• “The theme for the great poet could be the boredom of the Almighty after the seventh day of Creation”

• "In every religion, a religious person is an exception"

• “The supreme thesis: “God forgives the penitent,” the same in translation: He forgives the one who submits to the priest ...”

• "Dogma o" immaculate conception“?.. Why, they defiled the conception…”

• "Pure Spirit - Pure Falsehood"

• “Fanatics are colorful, and it is more pleasant for humanity to see gestures than to listen to arguments”

• “The word 'Christianity' is based on a misunderstanding; in fact, there was one Christian, and he died on the cross"

• “The founder of Christianity believed that people did not suffer more from anything than from their sins: this was his delusion, the delusion of one who felt himself without sin, who lacked experience here!”

• “The teaching and the apostle who does not see the weakness of his teaching, his religion, etc., blinded by the authority of the teacher and reverence for him, usually has more power than the teacher. Never before has the influence of man and his works proliferated without blind disciples.”

• "Faith saves, therefore it lies"

• “Buddhism does not promise, but keeps its word, Christianity promises everything, but does not keep its word”

• "Martyrs only harmed the truth"

• “A person forgets his guilt when he confesses it to another, but this latter usually does not forget it”

• “Blood is the worst witness of truth; they poison the purest teaching with blood to the point of madness and hatred of hearts.

• “Virtue only gives happiness and a certain bliss to those who firmly believe in their virtue, not at all to those more refined souls, whose virtue consists in a deep distrust of themselves and of all virtue. After all, here too “faith makes blessed”! - but not, well note this, virtue!

• "Moral people feel complacent with remorse"

• "School of Survival: What Doesn't Kill Us Makes Us Stronger"

• “Love, perhaps, your neighbor as yourself. But above all, be those who love themselves.”

• "The Jewish stock trader is the most vile invention of the entire human race." (This phrase was added by Nietzsche's sister, during the years of his madness, Nietzsche himself despised anti-Semites)

• "You go to a woman - take a whip"

• "Life would be a mistake without music"

• "Blessed are those who forget, for they do not remember their own mistakes"

Artworks

Major works

• "The Birth of Tragedy, or Hellenism and Pessimism" ( Die Geburt der Tragodie, 1871)
• "Untimely Reflections" Unzeitgemasse Betrachtungen, 1872-1876)

1. "David Strauss as Confessor and Writer" ( David Strauss: der Bekenner und der Schriftsteller, 1873)
2. "On the benefits and harms of history for life" ( Vom Nutzen und Nachtheil der Historie für das Leben, 1874)
3. "Schopenhauer as an educator" ( Schopenhauer als Erzieher, 1874)
4. "Richard Wagner in Bayreuth" ( Richard Wagner in Bayreuth, 1876)

• « » ( Menschliches, Allzumenschliches, 1878)
• "Mixed opinions and sayings" ( Vermischte Meinungen und Sprüche, 1879)
• "The Wanderer and His Shadow" ( Der Wanderer und sein Schatten, 1879)
• "Morning Dawn, or Thoughts on Moral Prejudices" ( Morgenrote, 1881)
• "Merry Science" Die frohliche Wissenschaft, 1882, 1887)
• « » ( Also sprach Zarathustra, 1883-1887)
• « » ( Jenseits von Gut und Böse, 1886)
• “On the genealogy of morality. Polemic essay "( Zur Genealogie der Moral, 1887)
• "Casus Wagner" ( Der Fall Wagner, 1888)

We all know the phrase. American psychologists managed to prove with the help of research that these are not just words. Life's challenges really make you stronger! And if you do an analysis of life successful people, then in the biography of many of them, one can find periods serious trials. A study on the impact of adverse life events on mental health found that trials teach a person to adapt better and recover faster peace of mind. If you have now difficult period in life, hold on! Read more about the study here...

Life's challenges really make you stronger

Study participants reported negative events throughout their lives; they also recorded some indicators of mental health.

According to other studies, life tests adversely affect mental health and well-being.

2389 people participated in this study. Scientists have found that people who have experienced adverse life events have better mental health and well-being than those who have not.

“We analyzed the impact of adverse events on such indicators as general mental exhaustion, functional impairment, post-traumatic stress, and life satisfaction. According to earlier research, adverse life events have a direct negative impact on measures of mental well-being. However, we were able to find a U-shaped relationship, that is, in people who underwent a large number of life's troubles, as well as people who did not tolerate them at all, showed good indicators of mental health and life satisfaction, ”explains Mark Seery, lead author of the study. (University of Buffalo, USA).

It also found that people who had previously experienced life's challenges were better than others at coping with recent adverse events.

Although it is impossible to establish a causal relationship, the authors of the study suggest that, to some extent, life's trials teach how to maintain and restore mental balance.

“Although we took into account only serious life tests, such as the loss of a loved one, in all likelihood, less tragic events also contribute to the development mental stamina”, adds Mark Seery.

Adapted from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
Prepared by Anastasia Maltseva.
Source: Medlinks.ru

P.S. The material was recommended for publicationOlga Tutina(a regular reader of the blog and a participant in distance training). By publishing the results of my research on this blog, I hope that it will help many people to accept and overcome life's trials with dignity. Everything passes. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger. Thank you Olga!

Sincerely,
Dmitry Poslavsky.

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27 comments

• lena said:

  I don’t agree, for the first time in my life I experienced a mental trauma, and I still can’t cope with it

  lena, perhaps you should consult a psychologist or psychotherapist.

  I was convinced of this truth on my own life experience over the past 3 years. Too many bad things happened, but now everything is much better.

  Crazy blows of stupid mistakes
  On their own skin, everyone has tried it.
  It is important, however,
  Make the right conclusion
  To miss the whip, do not test twice.

  In times of hardships, hardships and delusions.
  No need to cry into a vest.
  He is protected from bad weather.
  Who soberly looks, looking for a way out,
  What is wrong? How to get away from troubles?

  After all, everything that happens to us
  All…. From tears to smiles.
  We record in experience -
  Collection of our victories and mistakes.

  And everyone perceives differently
  Those lessons that he asks himself.
  Someone, out of difficulties, erects a fence.
  And someone creates a springboard from them.

  Do not be afraid of mistakes, problems, ... avoid failures.
  Paradox... But they are moving us forward.
  And our path, through life, is always illuminated.
  Just. They need to be understood, understood and solved ...

  There is such an American psychologist Larry Crabb, his book "Inside Out" helped me in a particularly difficult and VERY long period of continuous suffering. The idea of ​​this passage was - and I will say it in my own words - that one can direct one's primary interest in life first of all into conscious observation of oneself and building one's personality, and also the spiritual and personal growth that inevitably follows.
  If a person consciously chooses this path, then regardless of difficulties, trials, suffering and deprivation, he accustoms himself to rejoice on this path, despite tears and experiences. Moreover, the author offers VULNERABILITY and FORGIVENESS as the main and consciously chosen growth tools.
  Thus, having shifted his interest to the area of ​​growth, that is, attention, trust, love and respect for his own personality in the first place, a person gradually learns to find joy and benefit from any experience.
  For myself, I call it: THE JOY PRINCIPLE. I hold on to him and he justifies himself.
  Everyone suffers and is injured, this is an indispensable condition of our life. It is accompanied by pain, but I note that mostly pain occurs where healing and transformation are needed. And it depends only on the person's knowledge of what he wants and his choice.
  You can suffer and let your suffering go down the drain, in which case both I and you are really unfortunate people worthy of regret, or you can use the same suffering
  to build a solid foundation for growth, development, happiness, and much more, which together is called the FULL OF LIFE.
  It doesn't matter what happens to us, what matters is what we do with it!

  I agree with “madinna”: “difficulties break the weak, they make the strong LEN stronger.” strong, just, and can cope with the situation, accepting it as a useful experience. I’ll add on my own that the mess around us is a consequence of the mess in ourselves. my mess, brought me to health problems, and the further it got worse. perceived others, especially relatives, with wild irritation. all sorts of troubles stuck to me. I began to practice according to a certain methodology, but it took more than a year for noticeable results. the essence of the methodology is precisely to put things in order in oneself, and only after that environment will change for the better. there will always be difficulties, if you learn to be “friends” with them, then they will be for your own good ( personal experience priceless).

  I absolutely agree with Dmitry that the biographies of great people are direct proof of the saying “What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger”. Either you master the situation, pain, fear, illness, and become stronger from this, discover some new facets of yourself. Or negativity takes over you and your life. I think the answer to the question is critical here: “Are you afraid or not afraid?”. Pain, betrayal, death, lack of money ... If you accept the situation, find the reasons in yourself, change and move on, you will really become stronger. I know for myself.