We all have our own opinions - and, of course, there will always be someone wrong. As a result, every day we observe around us a cloud of unflattering remarks and elementary rudeness from the lips of relatives and strangers who do not seem to think at all about the appropriateness or effect of their words. The easiest way is to dismiss them with counter aggression, but you can also benefit from other people's comments - of course, if the criticism is constructive. We have heard this magic spell more than once, and it's time to figure out whether constructive criticism is possible at all and why it is so important to learn how to criticize correctly without hurting the feelings of another person.
So what is correct criticism and why is it so rare?
WHY WE HAVE CRITICISM
Oddly enough, praise does not necessarily lead to positive results, and criticism does not necessarily lead to negative ones. It is not easy for us to perceive any feedback on our actions and work - both positive and negative - as they affect several important points for us at once: on the one hand, our desire for self-development, on the other hand, the desire to be accepted and respected by others.
And yet, we tend to react more sharply to criticism than to praise. We almost always remember negative events (which include criticism) more strongly and in more detail. The reason for this may be evolution - in the course of it, we learned to respond faster and more strongly to negative stimuli: in the wild, they often mean a mortal threat, so paying attention to them in time was important for survival. Now our life has changed, but we still react strongly to negative events.
Another reason criticism evokes so many emotions and feelings is the novelty of the experience. We react more strongly to new and unfamiliar stimuli. In a culture where polite approval (albeit often only formally) is the norm, open and direct criticism is perceived by us as something unusual and new - and therefore more impressive.
WHAT IS THE USE OF CRITICISM?
Contrary to popular belief, criticism is an important tool that helps us improve and work on our mistakes. Correct and constructive criticism - required element working relationships, it is also important in relationships with a partner, friends and loved ones: without the ability to discuss what does not suit you, it is impossible to build a strong relationship.
Being calm about criticism helps us make bolder, less obvious decisions and teaches us that our actions and our work will not necessarily please everyone. We cannot evaluate the result of our work or our idea from the outside. Constructive criticism helps to identify weaknesses in the work and understand what can make it better. Obviously, if a project or idea has a serious flaw, it is better to hear a remark, even if not very pleasant, the main thing is constructive, which will help to correct it, than a false assurance that everything is perfect.
Criticism is, in principle, one of the main and, under certain conditions, productive tools for the development of society and human relations. When we are criticized, we learn not to assert ourselves alone in our opinion, position, but to open up to the world of others, to interact with them at the level of mutual rational understanding.
WHEN IS IT APPROPRIATE TO CRITICIZE?
It is worth criticizing if your remark is aimed at helping a person, and not humiliating and insulting him or simply pointing out his shortcomings. It is generally accepted that if a person shows his work, he should be ready to listen to any remark and gratefully accept everything that he is told. This is not so: even if you see flaws in the work of another person, consider whether you are target audience project and whether you understand this topic, because otherwise your remark does not have as much weight as it seems to you, do these shortcomings really have such great importance, or something just doesn't match your preferences and expectations?
The basic right to criticize appears when the product of the activity of the criticized is directly related to you and your life - this happens in family and relationships, and when working together. You can also criticize if it is you who has to deal with the consequences of other people's "jambs". Criticism in all other cases - free choice criticizing.
An important feature of correct and constructive criticism is the appropriateness of the remark - a person should really want to hear your opinion and a clear understanding that it will really benefit the other person, and not just upset him. This also applies to comments about appearance - it is stupid and presumptuous to expect that a person will rush to change himself to please your taste. It makes sense to criticize where the lack of criticism can lead to disastrous consequences. For example, when an obviously unfair law is passed, or when another person behaves unethically towards you or another member of society. But in this case, it is important to remember that in order for your opponent to accept your criticism, it must satisfy the basic requirements of social ethics. It should be directed at an unfair act or position, not at a person, appeal to a shared sense of fairness or mutual respect, expect a response, and use the most respectful language of mutual communication.
WHAT MAKES CRITIQIC CORRECT AND CONSTRUCTIVE?
It is important to stipulate that not everything that we consider "our" truth, view and opinion is correct and constructive. The concept of "correctness" is a very voluminous meaning and adherence to minimum ethical requirements:
- it is necessary to criticize with maximum respect for the opponent;
- enter into a position and understand the real situation of the person opposite;
- the fact of discovering a certain flaw in another is not yet a reason for criticism;
- you first ask the subscriber: does he have a need and desire to hear your opinion on this matter;
- should be criticized where appropriate, assuming that you will be perceived adequately and will be able to maintain a conversation at a decent level;
- are there other people who can somehow influence your communication or hear something;
- Are you an expert on the subject yourself?
- the characteristic "on time" is when there is a favorable time, opportunity and emotional condition the person opposite;
- be calm and balanced;
- do not transfer the shortcomings to the person as a whole, use figurative and metaphorical forms of communication;
- be able to stop, not ask again and stop if the person does not want to listen to you.
Before you begin to criticize, you should always try at the beginning to note all the merits, and best view correct criticism is the ability to use only questions that are open to reflection. You need to criticize by carefully considering your arguments, and not emotionally reacting to any words or personal qualities of the opponent.
REMEMBER! You always have the right to politely refuse to listen to criticism from any person, pointing out to him the use of unacceptable vocabulary, time, place and arguments against you.
Correct and constructive criticism is, first of all, a friendly, appropriate and respectful review of the work or actions of another person. It does not imply a transition to personalities, splashing out negative emotions and self-affirmation at the expense of another, and also should not hurt the self-esteem of another person - all this has nothing to do with criticism.
Correct and constructive criticism is made by the position of rapprochement, not distance. The focus here should not be on hurting, demonstrating superiority, ridiculing - but on real help. But this approach is unpopular in our country because of the harsh conditions in which not only we, but also entire generations of our parents grew up. For many years it was believed that the correction of shortcomings is paramount both in the upbringing of children and in the lives of adults, that this is how we help each other a lot and only want good for the other. And praise, approval and support were not considered important, they were neglected by everyone, from families to the state. It is not surprising that criticism has such an impact on us and we have adopted this state of affairs as the norm.
We now have a very egocentric culture, so criticism is most often used as a way of dominating, showing power and scratching the ego. Therefore, with this approach, people usually "for politeness" at best listen, but do not hear, and at worst, they do evil, intensifying their reaction, starting to prove their position, which usually leads to even more deplorable consequences, in which the criticized he himself pushes the other with his incorrectness, and as a result says the beaten and very unloved by many phrase "I knew it, well, I said so", they smirk and take on the role of a great soothsayer. I think that many people recognized in these words their loved ones, and especially moms and dads, who, with their incorrectness and their "truth", drove us into unnecessary events in life, which then came back to us for a long time. But this is not their fault, no one is to blame, the whole point is that this is how two immature (it's not about age) EGO or MIND meet, which by such actions educate and involve us in various experiences.
WHAT DO WE MISTAKEN AS CRITICISM?
When expressing critical remarks, we, as a rule, do not strive to ensure that our criticism is correct and constructive. Often we do not even think about helping another - instead, we talk about our thoughts, preferences and tastes or splash out on the interlocutor negative emotions. Constructive criticism should be appropriate and timely - unsolicited humiliating remarks and caustic comments will not bring your interlocutor any benefit.
In most cases, we don't care about constructability. No one taught us this, oh peace of mind people are not supposed to worry. But literally with mother's milk, we learn that any invading, touching and evaluative statement should be listened to and taken into account. This is how most people interpret the word. For the most part, if you can now admit it and not do it, it will be a big leap forward for you, we use criticism as a veiled manipulation to adjust a person to suit your interests, tastes, conveniences, and someone to participate and be needed for the look . We do not have a culture of constructive everyday criticism, any comments are usually instructive, aggressive and humiliating, which only helps to distance people from each other, and help develops into aggravation.
SO WHAT'S THE SECRET?
Before you criticize another person, count to ten and try to understand your ulterior motives. If they are connected with the help of the criticized, you are ready to be correct and matched the characteristics "on time" - that's good, you can try. If you notice that you still want to show your superiority more and various motives are more connected with you, and not with another person, and the subject of criticism does not directly affect your life, it is better to remain silent.
You should never turn your remark into an accusatory monologue: criticism is primarily a form of communication and thinking out loud, and not proving opinions. Your comments should always be respectful and friendly. The main rule of correct and constructive criticism is the “rule of sandwich”: “place your comments and criticism between two positive statements: first approve, then criticize, and finally cheer again.” It is important to understand that correct criticism is a skill and essential tool communication to learn...
Literary critic Alexei Kolobrodov about rapper Zakhar Prilepin and his new record.
Zakhar Prilepin and Rich recorded the album "To the Ocean". This is the second general work(the first was the album "Pathologies") of the duet famous writer and a young rapper, has become much more generous in sound and representation: feats, “co-ops”, with the underground bard Branimir, rockers Alexander F. Sklyar (“Va-Bank” and others), Andrey Mashnin (“Mashnin Band”), Gennady "Hans" Ulyanov ("Elefunk") and rapper Husky. Plus Ivan Okhlobystin, who is just as difficult to define as an actor as a clergyman.
The name of the disc, as interviewers and reviewers have noted, refers to Leonid Leonov's 1935 novel, The Road to the Ocean. (Actually, in one of the clips filmed for the release of the album - I will talk about them later - the corresponding Leonov volume from the collected works prepared by Prilepin, and Zakhar's book about the most mysterious Soviet classic - "Accomplice of the Epoch") flicker. However, this is not about some direct allusions to the favorite writer of one of the co-authors. The connection here is more complex and denser. The concentration of meanings, sometimes difficult to perceive by ear, repeats the tightly fitted verbal mechanics of Leonid Leonov. The action of the novel "The Road to the Ocean" - a novel of railway, industrial, socialist realism, but also fantastic-futurological, freely unfolds in several times and elements at once. Also - "To the Ocean" - a road movie album ("like in Kerouac's novel, what is this station / what are these tanks, and what are these dances") lyrical hero which, one for two co-authors, freely travels not only in space, but also in time. In the story “The Capture of Velikoshumsk”, the main character, in fact, is a tank, a front-line “thirty-four”; the co-authors of the album seem to have a tank as their favorite vehicle.
And most importantly, perhaps, the internal rhythm of the album unfolds in a very Leonovian way - both aggressively and meditatively... Even Alexander Feliksovich transferred his former and pioneering hit "Moscow Routes" into the register of a shamanic ritual.
In terms of allusions, or, let's put it closer to the rap style, references to authorities, the album is also all right: in plain text, the 50 cent rapper, the poet Ryzhiy (a note of branded, from Ryzhy, boyish urban sadness can be heard in a poignant, lyrical composition "Heat"), prose writer "Gaito". There are also more gourmet options. The track "Beat your tail" pulsates between the poles - Yanka Diaghileva and Korney Chukovsky. And, say, the line “At the checkpoint near paradise, what will you refer to?” (the track "To the Ocean") refers to Vladimir Vysotsky's cruel ballad "Paradise Apples".
Everyone remembers “I went into the cage instead of a wild beast” by Joseph Brodsky. In the track "Capital" Zakhar Nobelata not only rethinks, but mimics with a smirk:
… so many times I tried to love this city
I've been sober for twenty years and I've been stoned for twenty
snow flew at the temple, poured rain over the collar
centuries passed. now I'm forty.
Prilepin noticeably influences Rich, a talented and receptive rap poet. The master's extensive cultural baggage, or rather, his long-standing passion for the poetics of Anatoly Mariengof, clearly echoes in the lines of the younger co-author (graceful rhyming with a spacing of stresses):
Elite brigade, tanks, dags
In the toilet someone's head wiped boots
Zadroty filled in Lenin's paper
While in the dryer they punched an elk from its foot
("In the army").
A combination of elements, at a superficial glance, incompatible: intellectualism and “quiltedism” And the imagist step of Mariengof sounds piercingly in the thing I mentioned “Heat”: “Night, like a tear came out of my eye. / slid down the roofs like on eyelashes. /, and I seemed to be born again, like Lazarus. / and the dead poet is beautiful on the pages ”- a slate sketch, a portrait of Anatoly Borisovich.
We note one more combination of elements, at a superficial glance, incompatible: intellectualism and “quilting”. My friend, journalist Aleksey Ivanov, a young man with a much more sensitive ear for rap culture than mine, after listening to the album, discovered a level of trolling that goes back almost to Blok’s “Scythians”: “By the way, the first program song,“ You like it." Where “our idea is an icon, berdan, cahors and an ax.” All this cherished Eurasianism: yes, we are wild Scythians, we have our own rural punk here. Well, that is, the continuation of the story with "it's time to bring down" and a line of quilted jackets. Conscious reduction of the image.
Significant transitions. I had to say that Zakhar Prilepin, this imperial, patriot, symbol of “quiltedism”, he, in terms of his style of existence, is quite western type artist: the artist.
This main paradox of his eludes the domestic intelligentsia, and Prilepin's most insightful opponents are invariably discouraged. But really, Zakhar’s breakthroughs from literature and politics into music, whether it’s the carnival rock Elefanka or social rap, are clearly outside the Russian tradition, but they convincingly rhyme with American beats, and generally have a dash-dotted Hollywood context.
But the next one follows from this paradox, and the pendulum returns again. Almost all prominent Russian rap is patriotic by definition, regardless of geography - here is the Baku “Caspian cargo”, and Tipsy Tip from Ukraine, and even Oxxxymiron who lived in London. But this patriotism, I must say, is static - rappers love Russia in a Rozanov way, for the very fact of its existence, like the peasant poets of Yesenin's circle - with all its hardships and imperfections. In this sense, Russian rappers are, oddly enough, a very archaic audience; “in the morning in the newspaper - in the evening in the verse”, this is not about them, if we mean the newspaper Izvestia, and not the newspaper Life. It is difficult to wait for an actual political statement from these guys; However, this story is not only about rap.
In the album "On the Ocean" metaphysical Russia is brought into line with physical, direct action.
Here they begin to forget how tanks are started
Letting in aliens straighten our postures
barking dogs, howling sirens, our bets: either - or.
if we were not captured, wait for the news on the air
("Ocean").
A poetic sense is a much more sensitive tuning fork of time than the asses of millions of ordinary people. But, in fact, a hero who lived in megacities and barracks is ready to dangle (and we know that in the case of Zakhar, and even Rich, this readiness easily turned into “the kid answered”) along the fronts and smoky borderlands, always remembers that the main work is ahead, at home:
we were not invited at the time of the division and
strange but true: we did not hold evil
in the same year I left the rhyme
and chose a different path and skill
iron and shooting range, where the soul has been cleared
but I knew it would come in handy and, yes, it came in handy
who to blame - on everyone's fault, after all,
but you know what's especially bad here
you will spend your whole life to fix
what came in the ninety-first
("in the 91st").
And no less program track "Serious people" (who "spoiled the world") is not only an anti-capitalist, non-conformist manifesto, but also a danger signal for some. A poetic sense is a much more sensitive tuning fork of time than the asses of millions of inhabitants.
P. S. A few words about the clips (“Capital”, “Serious People”, “To the Ocean”), a mini-series filmed for the presentation of the album. Energetic and cheerful, although somewhat broken plot, about bounty hunters who have become prey. Not without the influence of the "Russian plantain" group 25/17 - a cycle of story clips, in some ways avant-garde, in some sense traditional, accompanying all the tracks of the already epoch-making album. Plus, quite good adherence to the traditions of Tarantino, Balabanov's "Brother" and the best examples of modern documentary drama. The camera work and editing (Vlad Zvizdok) is quite on the level, and I sincerely applauded some of Vlad's findings: a character with cigarettes, similar to the Blotter from the "Meeting Place". Or to the heroes observing the bloody deeds of their hands, through the windshield and rear glass of the rare Volga, GAZ-24 ... But the main thing is not even that - for quite, with all the props, the sinister content of such a movie, one can see the atmosphere of friendship, evil fun, young strength - extremely congenial to the spirit of the record "To the Ocean".
We can say that Limonov is switching to serials - this is the third book of his obituary essays, not to mention numerous memoirs and other memoirs. But, it is also worth noting that writers have always loved to add and update their memoirs, while Limonov himself from documenting own life made a long time ago special genre own name. And you will certainly go for his new book: "a sharp, angry, cheerful book," as it is said in the annotation of the obviously Limonovian work. This is true!
Piety here, as it is not difficult to guess, is generally the least. To the portrait on the gravestone of N. Medvedeva, he pronounces in the spirit - you are a fool, you would be more careful, you would still live; in memory of V. Novodvorskaya calls for the singing of virgin cats. He enters the "cemetery management" (the author's neologism) with the guards, looking for a grave he has never visited, and cannot help laughing - "Is there anyone alive here?" And thus causes irritation? To this E.V. don't get used to it.
In his grave essays, of course, there is a lot of Limonov himself - but if this is the main course, then the rest of the courses will not disappoint at all. An aperitif is a sketch of the life of the deceased with Limonov's assessments and memoirs about where they crossed paths (drank wine with Rokhlin in the Duma and went to the striking miners, discussed with Havel at a literary conference in Budapest). The first thing is the details-strokes with which Limonov paints and nails his characters (Toporov is a “German dwarf”, the same Novodvorskaya is a “holy fool”, and that's it).
And, of course, there will be many bright appetizers, spicy and unexpected, like a bartender's cocktail. Ecstasy in the club of the 90s in the society of BG, a concert in the most famous punk-rock club in the world CBGB with Voznesensky and the grenades he brought from Pridnestrovie to the LDPR buffet (“I still remember Volfych’s eyes and the smell of Olivier salad on the tables”). Would you like more? Of course, there will also be a sketch of the times. That Paris of the 80s, where, subject to obstruction for supporting Palestine, he died without a trace in a cheap Arab hotel Genet. Our free 90s, when “people drank in a snowstorm at night on the Arbat, shouted and argued about politics in a snowstorm.” And the 2000s, "what is called, neither fish nor meat."
Above is a sprig of parsley-humor (“OMON beats the assholes who came to pounce on me, what else does a person need?”) And a slice of lemon - the kind of imagery that can only be expected from a really large-caliber writer (“The whole day was fluffy, desperately White snow, and on the branches of lindens, where the windows of my two rooms in the center of Moscow go, a fairy tale has stuck).
In the red corner is an oil painting by old masters - "Eduard Limonov and Death". Regarding his “respectable”, as they say, age, Limonov jokes and flirts - that in some not very clear way he got into this “ age group”, which, at his age, could have forgotten something (and, of course, after a couple of lines, he perfectly recalls the “forgotten”). He is such an old man involuntarily, in general.
But yes, about death, though again without fear and reverence, but meditates, drops remarks like earth on the lid of a coffin. “So that I remember this scene and, after a good half century, knit a couple of pages in his honor. I can't imagine, but apparently so. There is little left of most people” (about his school friend who died early). “I am writing to prove that people’s lives are insignificant? Well, yes ”(about E. Bachurin). And all because “it is impossible to extract any morality from death. Is it that every death is practically proof of the absence of immortality?
It seems that Limonov still has time to write something about it.
Artists from different countries answer the question of how to draw historical comics and not screw up
April 7 at 15:00 at the Museum of Moscow portal “Rara Avis. open criticism”(rara-rara.ru) as part of the 17th Moscow International Festival of Drawn Stories “KomMissia” arranges a discussion “How to draw historical comics and not screw up?”
The meeting will be attended by the artist, author of the textbook on comics Ilpo Koskela (Finland), comics artist, Chief Editor comic book Aargh! Tomas Prokupek (Czech Republic), artist, coordinator of the project dedicated to Armenian caricature, Badabada Tigran Arakelyan (Armenia), artist and art director of the ComMission festival Alexey Iorsh (Russia). Moderator - Alena Bondareva, founder and editor-in-chief of the Rara Avis portal.
Participants will discuss who draws comics about history and why. Is superficial knowledge about the chosen era enough or is it necessary to study history in depth? What mistakes do budding comic artists make when portraying historical events two hundred years ago? And how to draw something that happened only two years ago? Are there hacks? Is it important, and most importantly, is it possible to have an unbiased assessment of what happened?
“Historical comics are a special genre that requires the artist to pay special attention to the details and circumstances of previous eras. Usually, work on such a comic is preceded by a serious research not only on the Internet, but also in museums, work with scientific literature. Artists painting on historical themes they often “fall ill” with material history and at the same time are engaged in reconstruction and collecting,” said Alexei Iorsh, comics artist and art director of the KomMissia festival.
Moscow international festival hand-drawn stories "KomMissia" (kommissia.ru) - one of the largest domestic comics festivals held in the Russian state library for young people. The festival has been successfully introducing the ninth art form to Russian readers for several years.
