Performance Princess Yvonne. Drinking princess and smoking prince

Alla reviews: 183 ratings: 183 rating: 386

I really liked the performance of Mikhail Troinik in the role of Philip. Not a game, he lived the life of a Prince. Mad from power and permissiveness, benefactor, experimenter, feeling Yvonne. I enjoyed playing Mikhail in Dead Souls by Kirill Serebrennikov at the Gogol Center. In "Yvonne" another Michael, because. The character is different, the context is different. In these sensations of another person, it is manifested acting skills. Bravo!
Did not leave indifferent Yvonne performed by Daria Ursulyak. Especially in the scene of violence by the king over Yvonne (in principle, the whole performance is violence against the Heroine Ursulyak), I was scared for Daria. The valet twisted her arm too believably.
I don’t understand why the director undresses (and in different ways) his characters. Girls - Daria Ursulyak completely, Maria Fomina to the waist, Mikhail Popov to the rope in front, Agrippina Steklova leaves in a suit - leather imitation, Kirill Byrkin and Mikhail Troinik to the waist, Alexander Feklistov to underpants.
One can feel "cubism" in the scenery, innovation in stage lighting (projections on the stage walls instead of classical scenery), in sound. The director is careful with paint (the lips and face of Agrippina Steklova once), I took it as a reference to the makeup in Butusov's "Othello" by Satyricon, in whose troupe Agrippina Steklova and Daria Ursulyak.
Cruel performance. Yvonne is a catalyst for hidden desires, fears, "sins" of each of the characters in the play. "You can do anything with it," says Prince. I was shocked by the permissiveness vividly illustrated by the play. The "higher" a person is, the greater the responsibility for others, the more perverse his fantasies. The Prince's experiment on Yvonne is a childish prank compared to his dad the King's "test". Each of the participants in the performance has his own secret, a "skeleton in the closet", which comes to light with the appearance of Yvonne.
I do not recommend viewing if you do not like the work of Konstantin Bogomolov. "Yvonne" is not Bogomolov, of course, but provocations (with respect to the viewer) are present.
I do not recommend viewing if you want to have a fun and / or crazy evening in the theater and / or go on a date. This performance is the nakedness of hidden fears, desires, mental disorders, mental characteristics. An illustration of the permissiveness of those in power. It involves colossal mental and spiritual work during and after the performance. Clings, does not let go, innovation in light and sound, I scroll through the scenes in memory. The performance is not for the non-thinking Spectator, therefore "5".

a_baranoff3 reviews: 6 ratings: 28 rating: 6

Terribly boring and pointless performance. I didn’t see any nudity - maybe because we didn’t wait for the intermission and left in the first act? Didn't notice interaction analysis public system with a powerless person, as well as elements of comedy or psychological thriller. The only joke was the announcer's words, spoken in English (and, by the way, not dubbed in Russian on the screens - and therefore did not cause laughter in the hall), that a system for analyzing economic parameters was launched in Chile. On a single computer.
I'd rather go to Bogomolov and the Gogol Center once again.
And I demand a refund for poor quality services.

Marina S reviews: 3 ratings: 3 rating: 5

Disappointment! No, the nature of man's falseness did not become clear to me. The nudity that appeared in each action did not give any sharpness to the dull action. It's sad that I had to endure this for 3 hours. I would like to hope that only I did not understand the depth of the idea, but the audience, who left the performance en masse after the first act, convinced me that they agreed with me. I do not recommend to anyone.

Elizabeth reviews: 37 ratings: 79 rating: 43

Talk about how actively we seek to destroy a not-such-we-man. Do not move away from it, do not move away from yourself, but destroy it. Especially if such a person reminds you of what you yourself would like to destroy in yourself.

Yvonne is the very thin bone in the throat of society, with which it is still impossible to exist. We need as many conversations as possible on this topic. And even better - clear actionable conclusions. For a century now, we have not ceased to desire the extermination of those who are not-like-us. And we, that very silent minority, continue to keep silent, put our hand to this. Or maybe we're not a minority at all? - tells us the director. What if we are the majority?

Fragile Yvonne, brilliantly created by Daria Ursulyak, changes the space around her with every movement. And now not a single hero who has come into contact with her remains the same. Who is she? the author does not explain and the director does not at all seek to explain. She is a silent savage with the habits of an animal in the overalls of a faceless stage worker boldly looking into everyone's eyes.

Vitold Gombrowicz

Yvonne, Princess of Burgundy

Leonard Bukhov, translation from Polish

W. Gombrowicz (1904 - 1969) - a classic of the Polish avant-garde, who had a great influence on Polish and European literature and drama of the 20th century. The play was written in 1938, but its first production in Poland took place only in the early 1950s. Since then, "Yvonne, Princess of Burgundy" has not left the stage for more than half a century. Translated into sixteen languages, the play occupies a firm place in the repertoires of theaters around the world. One recent production was by Ingmar Bergman at the Stockholm Drama Theatre.

Publication of the translation: "Modern Dramaturgy", 1996/1. (C)(C)(C)

Characters:

KING OF IGNATIA

QUEEN MARGARITA

PRINCE PHILIP - heir to the throne

CHAMBERLAIN

IZA - court lady

KIRILL - friend of the prince

Yvonne's Aunts

INNOKENTIY - courtier

VALENTIN - footman

Dignitaries, courtiers, beggars, etc.

Place of festivities: trees, benches in the depths, festively dressed audience. At the signal of fanfare enter: KING IGNATIUS, QUEEN MARGARET, PRINCE PHILIP, CHAMMERGER, KIRILL, CYPRIAN, ladies and gentlemen of the court.

QUEEN. What a wonderful sunset.

CHAMBERLAIN. Truly wonderful, your majesty.

QUEEN. Looking at such beauty, a person becomes better.

CHAMBERLAIN. Better, without a doubt.

KING. And in the evening we will play cards.

CHAMBERLAIN. Only Your Majesty is given to combine an innate sense of beauty with your natural propensity to play bridge.

Fits BEGGAR.

What do you want, good man?

BEGGAR. Please provide financial support.

KING. Chamberlain, give him five groszy. Let the people see that we remember their needs!

QUEEN. Give me ten. (Turning towards the sunset.) At the sight of such a sunset!

LADIES. Ah-ah-ah!

KING. What's there - give me fifteen! Let him know his sovereign!

LORD. Ah-ah-ah!

BEGGAR. May the Lord Almighty bless the Most Serene King and may the Most High King of the Lord Most High bless. (Exits singing a song.)

KING. Well, let's go, we shouldn't be late for dinner, because we still need to take a walk around the entire park, fraternally communicate with the people on the day of the national holiday.

Everyone heads for the exit except PRINCE.

And you, Philip, are you staying?

PRINCE (picks up a newspaper lying on the ground). Me for a minute.

KING. Ha ha ha! It's clear! Ha ha ha! He has a date! Just like me at his age! So let's go, ha ha ha!

QUEEN (reproachfully). Ignatius!

Fanfare signal, everyone leaves except PRINCE, KIRILL and KYPRIAN.

KIRILL and KYPRIAN. End of boredom!

PRINCE. Wait a minute, here is the horoscope for today. (Reads.) From twelve to two ... No, not that ... Here! - The period from seven to nine in the evening will bring you a powerful surge of vitality, an increase in individual qualities, and will give impetus to wonderful, albeit risky ideas. This is a watch conducive to bold plans, great deeds...

CYPRIAN. And what is it for us?

PRINCE. ... conducive to success in love affairs.

KIRILL. Then another matter. Look, some girls are spinning over there!

CYPRIAN. Forward! Don't delay. Let's do our duty.

PRINCE. What? What's the other debt? What do you mean?

CYPRIAN. Our duty is to function! Function! Nothing else but to function with blissful joy! We are Young! We are men! We are young men! So let us fulfill our function as young men! Let's give more work to the priests so that they can function! Ordinary division of labor.

KIRILL. Look, a very elegant and seductive lady is coming. And the legs are nothing.

PRINCE. No - how so? Is it the same again? And so on to infinity? Again and again? Again and again?

CYPRIAN. Don't you agree?! What can she think of us?! Of course, again and again! Always!

PRINCE. Don't want.

KIRILL. Do not want? What? What?! Refusing!

CYPRIAN. (surprised). Don't you, prince, feel sweet, carefree pleasure when sweet lips whisper: "yes", as if once again confirming their unchanging readiness?

PRINCE. Of course, of course, naturally ... (Reads.) "contributing to bold plans, great deeds, strengthening individual qualities and sharpening emotions. These watches are not safe for overly proud natures, who are characterized by an overly heightened sense of self-esteem. The cases that you will start in these hours, can be useful, but possibly harmful ... "Well, it's always like that.

ISA enters.

We greet you!

CYPRIAN. With the greatest pleasure!

KIRILL. With admiration!

ISA. Good afternoon What are you, Prince, doing here in seclusion?

PRINCE. I am doing my duty. My father inspires his subjects with his appearance, and with mine I immerse their daughters in the dreams. Why aren't you with the Queen?

ISA. Late. Here I'm chasing. Was on a walk.

PRINCE. Ah, you're chasing. Whom?

ISA. What are you, prince, absent-minded. Why is there such melancholy in his voice? Are you not enjoying life? And that's all I'm busy with.

PRINCE. Me too, and that's why...

PRINCE. Hmm... (Looks at them carefully.)

ALL. So what?

PRINCE. Nothing.

ISA. Nothing. Are you well, prince?

KIRILL. Cold?

CYPRIAN. Migraine?

PRINCE. No, on the contrary, something just came over me! Something has surged! Believe me, I am literally overwhelmed with emotions!

CYPRIAN (looks around). Oh, nothing blondie. Quite... quite...

PRINCE. Blonde? If you said - brunette, it would not change anything. (Looks around with a depressed look.) Trees and trees... Let something happen.

KIRILL. Oh, and there's another one coming.

CYPRIAN. With aunts!

KIRILL. With aunts!

Enter YVONNE and her two Aunts.

ISA. What's happened?

CYPRIAN. Yes, you look, prince, look, you will die of laughter!

KIRILL. Quiet, quiet, let's hear what they're talking about.

1st Aunt. Let's sit on the bench. Do you see, my child, those young people?

YVONNE (silent).

1st Aunt. Yes, smile, smile, my child.

YVONNE (silent).

2nd Aunt. Why so sluggish? Why are you smiling so languidly, my child?

YVONNE (silent).

2nd Aunt. Yesterday you were out of luck again. And today you are not successful. And tomorrow, too, no one will pay attention to you. Why are you so unattractive, dear? Why not sexy at all? Nobody wants to look at you. True Punishment God!

1st Aunt. We spent every last penny of our savings to order this floral dress for you. You cannot complain to us.

CYPRIAN. Well, ugly!

ISA (offended). Why same immediately - ugly.

KIRILL. Wet chicken! And the nose turns up!

CYPRIAN. Crybaby! Everything is wrong with her! Let's go show her our contempt! Let's hit the nose!

KIRILL. Yes Yes! This inflated roar would be nice to teach a lesson! Our sacred duty! You go first and I follow you.

They pass with sarcastic mines right in front of Yvonne, and then burst into laughter.

CYPRIAN. Ha ha ha! Right under your nose! Right under your nose!

ISA. Leave her - it doesn't make sense!

1st Aunt (to Yvonne). See what we're going through because of you.

2nd Aunt. She makes everyone laugh at us! God's punishment! I thought that even in my old age, when the end of my female disappointments comes, I can not be afraid that I will seem ridiculous. And now I have grown old, but because of you I continue to endure bullying.

CYPRIAN. Do you hear? Now they are talking to her. Ha ha ha, she deserves it! Get it right!

2nd Aunt. They laugh at us again. But you can’t leave, then they will laugh after us ... But if we stay, they laugh in our faces!

1st Aunt (to Yvonne). Why didn't you even move your foot at yesterday's ball, dear child?

2nd Aunt. Why isn't anyone interested in you? Do we enjoy it? We have invested in you all our feminine ambition, and you... Why don't you run skiing?

1st Aunt. Why don't you take up pole vaulting? Other young ladies are jumping.

CYPRIAN. How clumsy she is! Just looking at her annoys me! Damn annoying! This crap just pisses me off! Now I'll go and turn the bench over! How, huh?

KIRILL. No, it's not worth it. Why so much effort? It is enough to show her a finger or wave a hand, or something else like that. Any gesture towards such a creature would be a mockery. (Sneezes.)

2nd Aunt. Here you see? We are already being sneezed on!

ISA. Leave her.

CYPRIAN. No, no, let's do some trick on her. I came up with an idea: I'll pretend to be lame, and she will think that even a lame dog does not come to her for tea. (Intends to go to the bench.)

PRINCE. Wait! I came up with something better!

CYPRIAN. Wow! I give up my seat!

KIRILL. What did you come up with? Looks like you're about to do something unimaginable!

PRINCE (laughs, covering his mouth with a handkerchief). Fortel - ha-ha-ha, fortel! (Approaches the bench.) Allow me to introduce myself. I am His Highness Prince Philip, son of the King.

Aunts. Ah-ah-ah!

PRINCE. I see, dear ladies, you have some problems with this nice young lady. Why is she so apathetic?

1st Aunt. Just trouble! She has some kind of organic ailment. The circulation is sluggish.

2nd Aunt. And from this puffiness in winter, and mustiness in summer. In the autumn she has a constant runny nose, but in the spring - headaches.

PRINCE. Excuse me, you are literally at a loss as to which time of the year to prefer. And no medication helps?

1st Aunt. Doctors say: if she were livelier, more cheerful, blood circulation would increase and all ailments would stop.

PRINCE. Then why can't her mood improve?

1st Aunt. Due to poor circulation.

PRINCE. So, if it becomes more alive, the circulation will increase, and if the circulation increases, then it will become more alive. Funny situation. Some vicious circle. Hmm... of course, yes... you know...

2nd Aunt. You, Prince, of course, are being ironic. Well, we can't ban it.

PRINCE. I'm being ironic? No, I'm not ironic. Too serious right now. Don't you feel a certain strengthening of your individual qualities, a surge of vitality - don't you feel intoxicated?

1st Aunt. We don't experience anything, it's just a little chilly.

PRINCE. Strange! (To Yvonne.) And you - don't you feel anything either?

YVONNE (silent).

2nd Aunt. Where is she, what can she feel?

PRINCE. You know, when I look at you, I'm tempted to do something to you. For example, take on a leash and drive forward, or deliver milk to you, or prick you with a pin, or mimic. Your appearance annoys me, you are like a red rag, you provoke. Yes! There are people, as if created in order to unbalance others, annoy, drive them to madness. Such people exist, and each of them affects only a specific person. Oh! How you sit, how you touch with those fingers of yours, how you dangle with your foot! Unheard of! Just wonderful! Amazing! How do you do it?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Oh, how silent you are! How silent you are! And what an offended look! And you look just wonderful - like an offended queen! All filled with anger and resentment - oh, how much dignity and pretension you have! No, I'm going crazy. Everyone has their own creature, leading him into a state of delirium tremens, and you are such a creature created for me! And you will be mine! Cyril, Cyprian!

KIRILL and KIPRIAN come up.

Allow me to introduce you to this insulted queen, this proud Anemia! Look at how she moved her lips ... She would like to answer us with a barb, but right now nothing comes to mind.

ISA (suitable). What nonsense! Leave her! The whole thing is starting to get tasteless.

PRINCE (sharply). And you find that up to this point the taste has always been respected!

CYPRIAN. Allow me to introduce myself - Count Unworthy!

KIRILL. Ha ha ha, Baron Anemia! The sharpness, of course, is not the best ... but to the point.

ISA. Stop it, stop it - leave the poor thing alone.

PRINCE. Poor thing? Well, well, take it easy! Take it easy - I can and marry her.

KYPRIAN and KIRILL. Ha ha ha!

PRINCE. I said: take it easy - I can marry her!

KYPRIAN and KIRILL. Ha ha ha!

PRINCE. Stop it! I will marry her! Yes, she annoys me to such an extent that I will marry her! (To the Aunts.) You agree, don't you?

KIRILL. The joke is going too far. You can give a reason for blackmail.

PRINCE. Joke? But tell me, isn't she herself a colossal joke? Are jokes only allowed on one side? And if I'm a prince, isn't she a proud, insulted queen? Yes, look at her! Listen! Mademoiselle, mademoiselle! Mademoiselle, allow me to ask for your hand.

1st Aunt. What?

2nd Aunt. What? (He catches himself.) Prince, you are a noble youth!

1st Aunt. You, prince, are a true philanthropist!

CYPRIAN. Unheard of!

KIRILL. This is madness! I conjure you with the memory of your ancestors!

CYPRIAN. And I conjure you by the memory of your descendants!

PRINCE. Enough, gentlemen! (Takes Yvonne's hand.)

ISA. Stop - the king is coming!

CYPRIAN. King!

KIRILL. King!

Fanfare signal; enter KING, QUEEN, CHAMMERGER, courtiers.

Aunts. Let's leave quickly, here now such a storm will break out!

Aunts run away.

KING. A! Philip! Well, I see you are having fun! What did I say! Blood is not water!

QUEEN. Ignatius!

KING. Blood is not water, I tell you! All in me! (Aside.) But something, it seems to me, this nymph is a little ... that ... And what kind of stuffed animal is this, my son?

PRINCE. Allow me to introduce, most illustrious sovereign, - my bride.

KING. What?

ISA. He is joking!

KING. Ha ha ha! Joke! Joke! I see, my son, that you have inherited my penchant for jokes. And really, what else is left in my life. And, strange to say, I myself cannot understand why, but the more stupid and primitive the joke, the more joy it gives me. I instantly look younger.

CHAMBERLAIN. I fully agree, Your Majesty, with Your Majesty's subtle remark. Nothing rejuvenates like a truly ridiculous joke.

QUEEN (with displeasure). Philip...

PRINCE. This is not a joke at all.

QUEEN. How so? Not a joke? What is it, in that case?

PRINCE. My engagement!

KING. What?

The startled courtiers flee.

QUEEN (indignantly). First of all, I ask everyone to observe tact. (To Yvonne.) Look, my child, what a beautiful tree there is. (To the Prince.) Philip, what position are you putting her in? What position are you putting us in? What position are you putting yourself in? (To the King.) Ignatius, calm down!

PRINCE. Your majesties, in your eyes I see indignation at my act: how could I, a royal son, even for a moment put my person next to such a creature.

KING. He speaks well!

PRINCE. But if I nevertheless got engaged to her, then I did it not out of poverty, but out of excess - and therefore I think that I have the right to take such a step, I don’t see anything humiliating for myself here.

KING. From excess?

PRINCE. Yes! I am rich enough to be engaged to extreme poverty. And why should I only like beauty? Why can't you like a nondescript one? Where is that written? Where is there such a law that I am obliged to obey as a soulless mechanism? Am I not free man?

KING. Wait, Philip, are you seriously presenting us with your paradoxes? Don't pretend to be independent, it's just that everything is mixed up in your head, my son. Why complicate simple things? If the young lady is beautiful, you like her, and if you like her, then - go ahead ... but if she is ugly, then - goodbye, and legs in hand. Why complicate? This is the law of nature, which I myself, speaking between us (Looks back at the Queen.), I obey with pleasure.

PRINCE. And this law seems to me idiotically stupid, wildly rude, ridiculously unjust!

CHAMBERLAIN. He is stupid, of course, stupid, but, so to speak, it is the most stupid laws of nature that are most pleasant.

KING. Really, Philip, are you tired of classes at the Faculty of Boiler Design and your ideological work in the civil-social field?

QUEEN. Are you tired of your youthful games and amusements? Are you fed up with tennis? Are you tired of playing bridge and polo? But you could still play football and dominoes.

CHAMBERLAIN. Or are you, prince, no longer attracted by, how to put it more elegantly, the current ease of love-erotic relationships? Just unbelieveble. It would never stop tempting me.

PRINCE. To hell with erotic connections, to hell with everything - I'm getting married and the end!

KING. What? What? Is he getting married? And you dare to say that? He's mocking us, the impudent sucker! Yes! Scoffs! I will curse him!

QUEEN. Ignacy, you can't do this!

KING. No, damn it! I promise, damn it! I'll shackle him! Ha! I'll kick the bastard out the door!

QUEEN. Ignatius, calm down, otherwise there will be a scandal! Terrible scandal! Ignatius, because he does it out of the kindness of his heart!

KING. Out of the kindness of your heart to hurt right in the heart of the old father?

QUEEN. He's out of mercy! Out of mercy! He was touched by the plight of this poor thing - he was always unusually sensitive! Ignatius, I beg you, there might be a scandal!

KING (in disbelief). Touched by a hard fate?

CHAMBERLAIN. Your Majesty, now Her Majesty is right, the prince does this by virtue of innate nobility. He is doing a noble deed. (Aside.) Your Majesty, if you do not agree that this is a noble deed, you will get a scandal like twice two. He won't back down. You can't bring it to a scandal!

KING. Oh well! (To the Prince.) Philip, on reflection, we recognize the nobility of your decision, although it is somewhat hasty.

PRINCE. Where is the nobility here!

QUEEN (hurriedly). Nobility, nobility, Philip - do not interrupt, we know better - and in recognition of the nobility of your intentions, we deign to allow you to introduce us to your bride, whose plight aroused in us the highest feelings, all our generosity. We will accept her in the castle as equal to the most noble ladies, which, of course, will not lower our dignity, but, on the contrary, will elevate us!

PRINCE (goes to the back of the stage). Cyril, give it here - the king agreed!

QUEEN (aside, to the King). Ignacy, - just calmly.

KING. OK OK.

The Prince approaches, leading Yvonne by the hand.

Yes, this is ... well, well!

The courtiers, peering out from behind the trees, approach; fanfare signal.

PRINCE. Most Serene Sovereign! I present to you my bride!

YVONNE (doesn't respond).

CHAMBERLAIN. Bow, bow...

PRINCE (in a whisper). Bow!

Following the Queen, the King bows slightly.

YVONNE (doesn't respond).

PRINCE (a little bewildered, to Yvonne). This is the king, my father, his majesty, and this is my mother, her majesty ... Bow, bow!

YVONNE (doesn't respond).

QUEEN (hurriedly). Philip, we are so touched... What a lovely creature. (He kisses her.) My child, we will become a father and mother for you, we were so pleased with the Christian act of our son, we respect his choice. Philip, you should always strive for the sublime and never for the low!

CHAMMERGUER (gives a sign to the courtiers). Ah-ah-ah!

COURT. Ah-ah-ah!

KING (bewildered). Yes, yes... Well, in general... Of course...

QUEEN (hurriedly). Now send your bride and tell her to prepare a chamber for her. (Magnanimously.) And so that she has everything in abundance!

Chamberlain (signing to the courtiers). Ah-ah-ah!

COURT. Ah-ah-ah!

PRINCE, YVONNE, KIRILL, COURTIERS leave.

KING. Wow... Hold me! Have you seen? Have you seen anything similar? After all, it turns out that it’s not she to us, but we to her - not she to us, but we bowed to her! (Amazed.) Well, ugly!

QUEEN. Yes, ugly, but the deed is beautiful!

CHAMBERLAIN. If the bride is ugly, then the deed, of course, must be beautiful. Your Majesty, in a few days this will be over with the prince, but there is no need to force it, and I will look at him today and try to find out what his true intentions are. This is the usual extravagance, but just do not irritate him and cause resistance on his part. Now we should remain calm.

QUEEN. And tact.

The Prince's quarters, through one door enter the PRINCE, KIRILL, YVONNE, through the other - the footman VALENTIN with a rag in his hand.

PRINCE (to Valentine). Valentine, please don't get in the way.

VALENTIN exits.

Plant her here. I'm always afraid she'll run away. Maybe tie it to a table leg?

KIRILL. She is already half dead. Won't run away. Philip...

PRINCE. What?

KIRILL (with disapproval). Why do you need all this?

PRINCE. For what? For what? I have to defeat this monster, overcome the obstacle - you understand? There are hunters who dark night they go out one on one against the buffaloes... There are those who grab the bull by the horns... Kirill...

KIRILL. Can't agree with you today.

PRINCE. But, most likely, I am possessed by some burning curiosity similar to the one with which we examine the worm, touching it with a stick.

KIRILL. Let me tell you what I think.

PRINCE. Please.

KIRILL. Let's leave her alone, because half an hour will pass, and we will not know what to do with her ... And this is unpleasant, even very, I'm not talking about anything else - all this is too unceremoniously towards her.

PRINCE. It seemed to me that at first you yourself did not stand on ceremony with her too much.

KIRILL. I agree, I agree! But it's one thing - a light joke on fresh air and quite another to drag her here to the castle. Philip, leave this venture.

PRINCE. Yes, look at how she sits. Unheard of! No, just think, what an injustice! Really, if a girl is what she is, no one should like her? What confidence! What wildness in the laws of nature! (Looks attentively at Yvonne.) Here! You know? Only now, looking at her, I begin to feel like a prince to the marrow of my bones. And before - at best, I felt in myself a baron, and even then one of the poor.

KIRILL. Strange. And it seems to me that you treated her more like a baron than like a true prince.

PRINCE. Indeed, strange, and yet I must confess that I have never felt so confident, so excellent, even brilliant. Tra-la-la ... (Takes a pen with a pen and balances it, putting the end on his finger.) Look, it never worked before, but now it does. Apparently, in order to feel superior, you need to find someone who is significantly worse than you. Being nominally a prince doesn't mean anything yet - but now I understand what it means to be a real prince. Ease... (Dances.) Joy... Well, now let's look at the subject of our madness. Mademoiselle, would you be so kind as to tell us something?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. You know, she's not so ugly, only there is some component of misfortune in her.

KIRILL. That is the main trouble.

PRINCE. Tell me why are you like this?

YVONNE. (silent)

PRINCE. Silent. Well, why are you like this?

KIRILL. Doesn't answer, offended.

PRINCE. Offended.

KIRILL. And it seems to me that she is not offended, but rather, a little scared.

PRINCE. Slightly shy.

YVONNE (quietly, with effort). I'm not offended at all. Leave me alone, please.

PRINCE. A! Are you not offended at all? Then why don't you answer?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Well?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Can't answer? Why?

YVONNE (silent).

KIRILL. Ha ha ha! Can not! Offended!

PRINCE. Please, explain to us - what is the mechanism of your failures. You are not that stupid at all. Then why do people treat you like you can't even count to three? Why such stubbornness on their part?

KIRILL. She's not stupid, she's just in a stupid position.

PRINCE. OK then! Sorry, Cyril, but that's what surprises me! Look, she even has a proportional nose. And you can not say that it is limited. And in general, she looks no worse than many girls we know. Why is no one bullying them? Why, tell me? Why exactly did you become a goat, or rather, a scapegoat? Why did it happen?

YVONNE (quietly). And so without end. So in a circle.

KIRILL. Round?

PRINCE. How is it in a circle? Don't interfere. Round?

YVONNE. So in a circle, always everyone, everything is always ... It's always like that.

PRINCE. Round? Round? Why - in a circle? Some kind of mystic. Ahh, I'm starting to understand. Here, in fact, there is some semblance of a circle. For example: why is she so sleepy? Because I'm not in the mood. Why not in the mood? Because sleepy. Do you understand what a circle is? Hell circle!

KIRILL. It's your own fault, fool! Head up!

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Ha! She doesn't take you seriously!

KIRILL. A little more daring! A little bolder! AND better mood! More life! Take my advice - now you look offended. And you smile, and everything will be fine.

PRINCE. Let us smile. Do not be shy!

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Doesn't want to. And she does the right thing - if she smiles, it will come out insincere. And this will irritate, anger, unnerve, excite, provoke even more. She is right. It's just amazing, Cyril! Fabulous! This is the first time I see something like this. What if we smile first?

KIRILL. It won’t help either, because the smile will turn out to be forced, out of compassion.

PRINCE. There is some devilish combination here. Some specific, infernal dialectics. Look, you can’t say that she didn’t understand the situation in all its depth. This can be seen from her, although she is silent, like a grave. You know, it all resembles a certain system, like a perpetuum mobile - as if a dog and a cat were tied to a stick: the dog chases the cat and scares it, and the cat chases the dog and also scares it, and all this together rushes madly without end; and around - a complete stupor.

KIRILL. The system is closed and hermetically sealed.

PRINCE. Fine! And what was in the beginning? What was born first? It couldn't have been that way from the start. Why are you scared? Because timid. Why are you timid? Because a little scared. But what was the first thing that first began in you, long ago?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Hold on, hold on. Well, fine, but don't you have any merit at all? Really nothing at all? You can't just be made up of flaws. There must be at least something positive in you that gives support, a feeling of being right - something that you believe in, that you like about yourself. You will see - we will inflate this light, awaken you to life.

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Wait! Stop! This is very important - for example, let's say someone comes up to you and says that you are such and such - the most nasty and terrible things that kill a person, destroy, deprive him of the power of speech, life. And you answer: "Yes, I am like that, it's true, but ..." What - but?

YVONNE (silent).

KIRILL. Well? What - but? Speak boldly.

PRINCE. Well, for example: "... I have kind heart. I'm kind. "You understand only one advantage. This one plus!

KIRILL (sharply). Yes, speak! Answer!

PRINCE. Maybe you write poetry, huh? Some mournful songs, elegies... well, even if they are completely mediocre, but I swear to you, I will recite them with inspiration. Give me at least a foothold, just a foothold! So you write poetry, right?

YVONNE (silent).

KIRILL. She despises poetry.

PRINCE. And do you believe in God? Are you praying? Are you praying on your knees? Do you believe that our Lord Christ died on the cross for you?

YVONNE (disparagingly). Certainly.

PRINCE. Oh miracle! Finally! Thank you, God Almighty! But why is she talking about it... in a tone... in a tone of... disdain? About God - with disdain! About believing in God - with such contempt?

KIRILL. This is beyond my understanding.

PRINCE. I know, Cyril, what's the matter here. She believes in God because of her shortcomings and understands this. If she didn’t have flaws, she wouldn’t believe. She believes in God, but at the same time she knows that God is just a lotion for her psychophysical wounds. (To Yvonne.) Isn't that right?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Brrr... But there is, however, some terrible wisdom, insensitive wisdom in this ...

KIRILL. Treatment needed! Medicines! Pills and an appropriate course of treatment would help against this very wisdom. healthy image life - morning walk - sports - rolls with butter.

PRINCE. But, I'm sorry, you forget that her body does not perceive drugs. He does not perceive, because he is too sluggish. We have already established this. Cannot take drugs for lethargy due to being too lethargic. You forget about the vicious circle. Morning walks and sports would certainly help her to get rid of weakness, but she cannot go for walks because she is too weak. Dear gentlemen, that is, no, not gentlemen, Kirill, have you ever heard of anything like that? She evokes sympathy in me, yes, although this kind of sympathy ... its property ...

KIRILL. This is surely the punishment for sins. You must have sinned greatly as a child. Philip, in the depths of all this there is undoubtedly some kind of sin, it could not do without sin. Of course, you made a big mistake.

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Ha! I know where the dog is buried! Listen - if you are so weakened, then you feel less suffering - weakness entails weakening, do you hear? The circle closes in your favor, one balances out the other. All the charms, all the temptations of this world should not affect you so much, as a result you suffer less.

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. Well, how?

YVONNE (silent, scowling at the Prince).

KIRILL (notices her look). What is she looking at like that?

PRINCE. How?

KIRILL. It seems to be - usually! But still...

PRINCE (worried). What's up with her?

KIRILL. Philip! She's on you!

PRINCE. What - on me?

KIRILL. That's the thing... After all, it... devours you with a look... Passionately! Hot, damn it! She's getting close to you... well, in her own way... She's getting to you! To you! Beware - her lethargy is passionate, lustful as a thousand devils!

PRINCE. Yes, she ... She's just shameless! What shamelessness! Sophisticated shamelessness! And you dare to pester me, you otter! Let's set it on fire, shall we? Take a poker and heat it white - then it will jump with us! Then dance!

KIRILL. But Philip!

PRINCE. It has something impossible! Something unbearable! Your whole being offends me! It hurts to the very depths of my soul! I don't want to know anything more about your misfortunes - you, a pessimist, you - you, a realist ...

KIRILL. Philip!

PRINCE. Look how she sits.

KIRILL. Let him get up then.

PRINCE. And she will stand the same! Look how pleading she looks... how she asks... She keeps asking for something... something, something... she wants something from me. Cyril, this creature must be destroyed. Give me a knife - I will slit her throat with a light heart.

KIRILL. Good God!

PRINCE. No, I'm kidding! However, she is afraid - look, she was really scared. Terribly frightened - what meanness. Don't be afraid, I was just joking... It's a joke! Don't take it seriously if I'm joking...

KIRILL. You start fiddling.

PRINCE. What? Yes, indeed. It's funny. Do you really think I'm being silly? Very possible. But it's her fault, not me! She drove me, not I her!

Call: VALENTIN enters.

KIRILL. Who is it there? (Looks out the window.) It seems that there are guests ... Chamberlain, ladies.

VALENTIN. Open?

PRINCE. They came for reconnaissance. Let's go get ourselves cleaned up.

PRINCE, KIRILL and YVONNA go out. VALENTIN opens the door. Enter: Chamberlain, two gentlemen, four ladies, INNOKENTY.

1st LADY. Nobody here. (looks around.)

2nd LADY. Oh, that's hilarious! (Chuckles.)

1st MR. What if he's serious?

CHAMBERLAIN. Calm, calm, dear ladies! .. I beg you, just be serious.

The ladies giggle.

Please, no giggles.

The ladies giggle.

We just went in after a walk, as if nothing had happened, we want to understand what the matter is leading to.

1st LADY. Are you seriously? Ha ha ha! This is an idea! Look at her hat! Hat! Just morbid!

2nd LADY. You can burst out laughing!

CHAMBERLAIN. More restrained! More restrained! Pull yourself together!

GUESTS. Hee hee hee - oh, I can't! - Hee hee hee! Stop it, or I'll die. You stop it. - Scream! You can burst out laughing! (They laugh softly, encouraging each other; the laughter now intensifies, then subsides, only Innokenty does not laugh.)

Enter: PRINCE, KIRILL, YVONNE.

Prince! (All bow.)

CHAMBERLAIN. We were just walking nearby and could not resist (Rubs his hands.) - the whole company!

PRINCE. Yvonne dear! Glad to be able to introduce you, gentlemen, to my fiancee.

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah! (Bow.) We wish you happiness! We wish you happiness!

PRINCE. Get over your timidity, my joy, and say something. Darling, these gentlemen belong to better society, do not be afraid of them, as if in front of you is a crowd of cannibals or monkeys from the island of Borneo. Excuse me, gentlemen, but my fiancee is extraordinarily delicate, proud and shy. Show indulgence. (To Yvonne.) Sit down, dear, we won't stand forever.

YVONNE (as if trying to sit on the floor).

PRINCE. But not here!

GUESTS. Ha ha ha!

1st MR. I'd swear there was a chair.

1st LADY. Was, yes swam.

GUESTS. Ha ha ha! Witchcraft! Bad luck poor thing!

CHAMBERLAIN. Please, please. (Gives Yvonne a chair.) Just be careful!

KIRILL. Hold on tight so you don't run away again!

CHAMBERLAIN. Be careful, don't miss!

PRINCE. Don't miss, dear.

Yvonne sits down.

That's good!

Everyone sits down except the Prince.

1st LADY (aside to the Prince, familiarly). In truth, Prince, she's just ridiculous! Scream! I burst with laughter!

2nd LADY (towards the Prince). Oh, I'm dying! I'm dying of laughter! Now this is the most fashionable kind of joke - a draw; I did not know that you, prince, know how to play so talentedly. No, just look, ha ha ha!

PRINCE (taunting the guests with laughter). Ha ha ha!

GUESTS. Ha ha ha!

PRINCE (louder). Ha ha ha!

GUESTS (louder). Ha ha ha!

PRINCE (more loudly). Ha ha ha!

GUESTS (indecisively). Ha ha ha!

1st LADY. Unfortunately, I have to go... I remembered that I had a meeting. I hope you, prince, excuse me.

2nd LADY. I have to go too... Excuse me, Prince... They are waiting for me... (Quietly to the Prince.) Now I understand. All this is done to harm us! To play a trick on us, right? You, prince, wanted to mock us! You got engaged to this unfortunate woman to ridicule us! This is simply a caustic allusion to the vices and shortcomings ... of some court ladies. Oh I get it! You heard about how much effort Iolanthe spends on cosmetics and massages... and that's why you got engaged to such a mess... to make fun of Iolanthe, ha ha! I figured out the ironic meaning of your idea! Goodbye!

PRINCE. ironic meaning?

1st LADY (overhearing). Even if so, then rather, to put on public display and ridicule your two false teeth, which everyone knows about! Haha, don't be so cruel to her, prince, haha ​​- goodbye, I'm already late.

2nd LADY. My teeth? And in my opinion - your planted bust!

1st LADY. Or your crooked back!

2nd LADY. Better watch your toes!

GUESTS. Went! It's time for us!

PRINCE. What are you, gentlemen, running away?

GUESTS. We must go now! Goodbye! It is time!

The GUESTS leave, except for the Chamberlain and INNOKENTY; exclamations are heard: "leg", "teeth", "massage", "cosmetics" and caustic laughter.

CHAMBERLAIN. I'm sorry, prince, I'm sorry, prince, I'm sorry, prince, but I have to talk to you, and, right now! Please give me a minute to talk! You scared the beautiful ladies so much!

PRINCE. They were not afraid of me, but of their vices. It turns out that there is nothing more frightening. Ha! What is war, pestilence, and the like compared to an ordinary, minor, but hidden flaw, in other words, a defect.

INNOCENT. Sorry.

PRINCE. What's happened? Did you stay?

INNOCENT. Yes sir. Sorry. I just wanted to point out that this is meanness.

PRINCE. What?

INNOCENT. This is meanness. Excuse me, I'll sit down. (Sits down, breathing heavily.) Excitement always takes my breath away.

PRINCE. Did you say something that was meanness?

INNOCENT. Sorry. I got carried away. Excuse me, prince. Forget this incident. I'm sorry. (Wants to leave.)

PRINCE. Wait, wait, you said something that was meanness. Hold on for a minute.

INNOCENT (speaking either with deathly calmness or extreme irritation). But I see that I can no longer cope.

CHAMBERLAIN. Can't cope? Can't cope? What is this strange expression to handle?

INNOCENT. Get over what you started. (Wants to leave.) Excuse me.

PRINCE. Wait, why so mysterious, sir...

INNOCENT. The whole point is that I love her ... and therefore got carried away and protested. But now I take back my protest and ask you to forget this whole incident.

PRINCE. You? Do you love her?

KIRILL. That's the thing!

CHAMBERLAIN. Comedy!

PRINCE. You struck me to the very heart, sir. in an unexpected way The matter took a very serious turn. I don't know if you're familiar with the sudden transitions from laughter to seriousness. There is even something sacred in it. Some illumination. I am convinced that the trivial words - "love is blind" - should be placed on the pediments of temples.

INNOCENT. I'm just a humble person.

PRINCE. Yvonne, I'm sorry. Thank God, that means you can still be in you... Therefore, you can... And you have a man who... What a relief! After all, I started all this only because I could not stand you - even the thought of you was unbearable - if we are to speak seriously ... Excuse me, please. My children, I bless you. Go in peace. Leave me alone.

KIRILL (seeing that Yvonne lowered her head). Crying...

PRINCE. Crying? It's from happiness.

KIRILL. I would not trust this crybaby too much. She can only cry in grief. Do you love him?

YVONNE (silent).

KIRILL. This is silence in denial.

PRINCE. Oh! No need to worry! If there is a person who loves you, that's half the battle. (To Innocent.) You are a determined person, true man. Falling in love with her is a wonderful thing to do! You saved the whole world from disaster. Our duty is to show you the highest honors!

INNOCENT. My dignity compels me to declare that she loves me too, but, apparently, she is ashamed to admit this to you, prince, because loving me really does not honor her. (To Yvonne.) Why pretend - you yourself have said more than once that you love me.

YVONNE (silent).

INNOCENT (irritably). Well, well, you don't have to ask. To be completely honest, you attract me exactly as much as I attract you, and maybe even less.

PRINCE. You hear?

INNOCENT (coldly). Allow me, Prince, I will explain everything. If I said that I love her, I meant - well, that I simply did not find anything better, due to the absence. That is to say, due to lack of...

CHAMBERLAIN. Fi donc! How can you!

INNOCENT. The whole point is that best women, and even mediocre ones, are incredibly difficult to handle and unkind to me, but with her I rest, you can at least rest near her, and I am no worse for her than she is for me, with her I can at least for a while forget about this relentless, endless rivalry ... About all this tinsel. We fell in love with each other because I don't like her as much as she likes me, and - no inequality.

PRINCE. I admire your candor!

INNOCENT. I would gladly deceive you, but now it is impossible, the times are not the same, everything is in sight, the fig leaves have withered. And there is nothing left but to be frank. Yes, I do not hide that our love is so ... for the sake of mutual consolation ... because I am successful with women to the same extent that she is with men. But I will also not hide that I am jealous - yes, I will not hide my jealousy, I will express it with all consistency, I have the right! (To Yvonne, with unexpected passion.) Fell in love with him? Fall in love? Well? What?

YVONNE (shouting). Go away! Away! Away! Go away!

INNOCENT. Fell in love!

YVONNE (calming down). Out!

PRINCE. Responded. But in that case... She answered. She spoke. Have you heard? But in that case... that means... if she's already talking... that she's really in love with me...

INNOCENT. So it is visible. And as always, I lost. And so he must leave. I'm leaving. (Exits.)

PRINCE. I fell in love... And I should have hated it. I mock her. I humiliate. And she fell in love. And now... loves me. Because I can't take it. For this he loves me. The situation is getting serious.

VALENTIN enters.

Go away Valentine! What am I to do now?

CHAMBERLAIN. This situation, prince, should be treated with your characteristic youthful frivolity!

PRINCE (to Yvonne). No. Say no. You do not love me?

YVONNE (silent).

PRINCE. If she loves me, then I... then I am, therefore, loved by her... And if I am loved by her, then I am her lover... I exist in her. She enclosed me. And I have no right to despise her... if she loves me. I have no right to continue to despise her here, if there, in her, I am her lover. Ah, after all, I, in fact, always believed that I exist only here, on my own, on my own - and then immediately - bam! She caught me - and I ended up in her, like in a trap! (To Yvonne.) If I'm your favorite, then I can't help but love you. I'll have to love you... and I'll love you...

KIRILL. What did you think?

PRINCE. Love her.

KIRILL. You're up to something incredible! This is impossible!

PRINCE. Yvonne, put on your hat.

KIRILL and CHAMBERGER. Where are you going? Where are you going?

PRINCE. We'll take a walk. Together. Alone. To love.

Exeunt PRINCE and YVONNE.

KIRILL. What to do now?

CHAMBERLAIN. Turned his head!

KIRILL. For such an ugly thing to turn your head? Such a freak?

CHAMBERLAIN. Ugly women, when you let them get too close to you, can sometimes turn your head more than beautiful ones.

KIRILL. My mind is failing me!

CHAMBERLAIN. And I assure you, there is nothing more dangerous ... It is usually believed that the danger comes from pleasant women, but an unpleasant, truly unpleasant woman affects men - just like, however, a truly unpleasant man affects women ... wow! I always try not to get too carried away. The opposite sex always attracts! And such an unpleasant woman, especially if she is young and if her unpleasant qualities are pronounced ho, ho, ho! Especially for a young man who approaches her trustingly, passionately - ho, ho, ho - and then suddenly finds himself face to face ... with such terrible ... terrible things ...

KIRILL. What kind of things?

CHAMBERLAIN. You, young man, do not know about them, and although I hope I have considerable life experience, I do not know either. There is a certain kind of phenomena which a gentleman cannot know, for the reason that if he knew them, he would cease to be a gentleman.

What's there again?

VALENTIN enters.

VALENTIN. Open?

Enter KING and QUEEN.

QUEEN. Where is Philip? What are they, no?

CHAMBERLAIN. Gone.

KING. We came here in person, because he... Dear God, what did he do there again? The ladies ran to the queen with a complaint that our son, allegedly on purpose, for a prank, got engaged to this scarecrow in order to make fun of, well, this ... some kind of imperfections in their appearance ... Ha-ha-ha! Here's the bad guy! Well, if it's only for this, then it's not so bad.

QUEEN. And yet such things should not be allowed. My ladies-in-waiting are terribly indignant, and here you allow yourself inappropriate jokes.

CHAMBERLAIN. Yes Yes Yes! If only that was the case! Be careful!

KING. What's happened?

CHAMBERLAIN. It happened... What happened is that he is now falling in love with her there... he wants to love her... No, everything that is happening here cannot be put into words. The tongue does not turn! The situation is developing ... explosive. Your majesties! Be careful - it won't explode!

King and queen. What to do?

Rooms in the castle. KIRILL sits on a chair, two ladies pass by, giggling, followed by the PRINCE.

PRINCE. What are you doing here?

KIRILL. And nothing.

PRINCE. What were they talking about? Didn't you hear what those flip-tails were laughing at? Didn't pay attention?

KIRILL. The women laugh all the time. Giggling is the natural state of any woman, because a smile always adorns them.

PRINCE. And it's not over me?

KIRILL. Why should they laugh at you? So far, they've only made fun of each other.

PRINCE. If not over me, then over her... over my fiancee. I notice, however, that the character of laughter has changed. Perhaps I'm wrong, but it begins to seem to me that instead of ... she becomes the object of ridicule. All the courtiers - both ladies and gentlemen - are constantly whispering and giggling. Or maybe I imagined? But I guess... I beg you... Please try to find out what they say about us, what kind of ridicule. I want to know what they are laughing at. Of course, I don't care at all, I just want to know. And tell them on occasion that if they continue to allow themselves behind my back...

KIRILL. Philip, what's going on with you? You became irritable and touchy, as if you were your own bride.

PRINCE. Well, well, don't overdo it. Enough. I'm not used to me, my actions, my feelings becoming the subject of ridicule. Tell this public, if anyone will allow themselves faux pas, even if only in a hint...

In the depths, doors open, to the signals of fanfare enter: KING, QUEEN, CHAMMERGUER, YVONNE, IZA, courtiers.

QUEEN. Did you like it? It was delicious? Is it true? Are you full, baby? (Smiling, he kisses Yvonne.) Would you like another pear? Pear in sugar? Baked in sugar? Do you want something sweet?

YVONNE (silent).

QUEEN. The pear will give you strength. (Laughs) It's useful! Healthy!

KING. Healthy! Oh ho ho.

Silence.

QUEEN. Maybe some cream? Cream strengthens. This is useful. Well, do you want cream? Or milk? Milk with sugar?

Silence.

Well, what are you? No appetite? Oh, this is not good. What are we to do now? What? What should we do?

YVONNE (silent).

CHAMBERLAIN. Nothing? (Laughs indulgently.) Nothing?

KING. Nothing? (Laughs condescendingly. Suddenly nervously.) Nothing? (To the chamberlain.) Nothing?

QUEEN. Nothing...

CHAMBERLAIN. Absolutely nothing, your majesty. In essence, if I may say so, nothing.

Silence.

QUEEN. How timid she is... So sweet, quiet. That's only if at least occasionally answered us. (To Yvonne.) You should at least occasionally answer, my bird. It's easy. You should at least say something sometimes, baby, it is required by decency, elementary decency. You probably don't want to violate decorum... What? Well what are we going to do? What shall we do now? A?

KING. Well?

CHAMBERLAIN. A?

YVONNE (silent).

KING. Well, so how? Nothing? It's impossible not to know what you want! You can’t wander around the house all day and do nothing - nothing! It's boring. After all, it's boring. (Looks stunned at everyone.) Boring! Fear God!

CHAMBERLAIN. Boring!

QUEEN. Good God!

VALENTINE (entering). Your highness, the doctor is here, waiting in the gallery.

PRINCE (to Yvonne). Let's go talk to the doctor. With your permission!

PRINCE and YVONNE go to the door.

QUEEN. Philip! I beg you for a minute! Philip! (Prince returns. Queen - to the courtiers.) Leave us, gentlemen, we need to talk to our son.

The courtiers step aside.

Philip, you have nothing to complain about, we respect your feelings. They adopted the poor bird as father and mother. But is it possible to somehow influence her to become more sociable? Today at dinner she was silent again. And she was silent at dinner. Silent also at breakfast. And in general, all the time is silent. What does it look like and how do we look because of her silence? Philip, you have to keep up appearances.

PRINCE (sarcastically). Decency!

QUEEN. Philip, my son, did we not treat her cordially, as if we were a daughter? Don't we love her despite her many shortcomings because she loves you?

PRINCE (threateningly). So love her! Love! Anyway - I wouldn't advise you not to love her! (Exits.)

QUEEN. Lord, enlighten, Lord, show the way! Ignatius, maybe you're not warm enough to her - she's afraid of you.

KING. Afraid ... And how she snoops around the corners and looks out the windows, now at one thing, then at another. And nothing. (Surprised.) And nothing more! She will look through all the windows for us. Afraid... (To the Chamberlain.) Give me the reports! Here, France again boils! (To herself.) She is afraid, but what does she herself not know? To be afraid of me? (To the Queen.) And you too - you dance all around her. (Mimics.) A pear, a cake ... Like the hostess of a boarding house.

QUEEN. Yes, but you behave with her absolutely at ease before you speak, be sure to swallow your saliva. Maybe you think you can't hear it. And you talk to her like you're afraid of her.

KING. I? Like I'm afraid? This is what she is afraid of. (Hush.) Rogue.

CHAMBERLAIN. Perhaps the majesty of Your Majesty inspires timidity in her, which does not surprise me at all, since I myself sometimes feel awe. And yet, I would consider it useful if Your Majesty would deign to chat with her alone ... To instill in her great confidence ...

KING. Should I be alone with her? With this swell?

QUEEN. Great idea. She needs to be tamed gradually - first somewhere aside, alone, and then she will get used to us, so we will help her free herself from her incredible isolation and timidity. Ignatius, take this seriously. Now, under some pretext, I will send her here. Philip is just talking to the doctor. I will send her as if for a skein of wool, and you treat her like a father. (Exits.)

KING. You, chamberlain, sometimes blurt out such things - well, what am I going to talk to her about?

CHAMBERLAIN. But, Your Majesty, this is the most common thing - to approach, smile, talk, joke - then, of course, she will have to smile or even laugh - and then Your Majesty will smile again - and so from the smiles will arise what we call the atmosphere of secular communication.

KING. I'll smile, I'll smile ... And I have to grimace in front of her because she is timid? Chamberlain, you're on your own somehow. (Wants to leave.)

CHAMBERLAIN. But, your majesty! After all, your Majesty, I think, is not the first time to give courage - as well as instill timidity.

KING. Yes, but she's afraid... You know... well, it's... afraid, rogue.

CHAMBERLAIN. Every person is afraid of something.

KING. I agree, but she is afraid somehow sluggishly - afraid, but somehow apathetic. (Frightened.) Chamberlain, she is indifferently afraid. Whoa, it's coming. Hold on, I'm not going to play around here alone in front of her. Don't leave, stay. Eh, eh, eh (Tries to put on a friendly expression.)

Enter YVONNE.

Ah, please.

Yvonne approaches, looks around. The king is kind.

Well, well, what is there - what is there?

YVONNE. Wool...

KING. Wool?

YVONNE. Wool...

KING. Oh-oh! Here is the wool. (Laughs.)

YVONNE takes the skein of wool.

YVONNE (silent).

KING. Wool lost?

YVONNE (silent).

KING. Hm, hm! (Comes closer.) Well, well, what is it? Oh well. (Laughs.) Well? Are we a little scared? A? There is nothing to fear. Well! Nothing! (Impatiently.) If I said - nothing, then - nothing!

YVONNE (stepping back a little).

KING. I'm Philip's father... Philip's father, papa? Ugh! Not dad, but father! In any case... I'm not a stranger. (Approaches, Yvonne steps back.) Well, don't do it like that ... I ordinary person. The most ordinary one is not King Herod! Didn't eat anyone. So there is nothing to be afraid of. And I'm not an animal. I'm telling you I'm not a beast! Not a beast! (Excitedly.) And there is nothing to be afraid of! I'm not an animal! (Approaches, Yvonne abruptly retreats, dropping a skein of wool, the King screams.) Well, I tell you, there is nothing to be afraid of! After all, I'm not a beast!

CHAMBERLAIN. No no. Shhh... Not like that!

KING. Such a bastard!

Yvonne continues to back away and exits.

CHAMBERLAIN. Quiet! They can hear!

KING. Fears. Chamberlain, do you remember the one... that one... that was afraid... Swell... M-m-mu... Bye-bye...

CHAMBERLAIN. I would say that she does not know how to be afraid. Some of the ladies of the court are simply wonderfully afraid - charming, piquant - but this one has some naked fear. (With disgust.) Naked!

KING. Ha! I remembered something.

CHAMBERLAIN. Remembered?

KING. Fears. Do you remember, chamberlain, remember that one... that one... that we... A long time ago. How everything is forgotten.

CHAMBERLAIN. Who, your majesty?

KING. Yes, it was a long time ago. I completely forgot myself. For a long time. I was still in the princes then, and you were only in the project for a chamberlain. Do you remember that baby, which is that ... which we ... Yes, it seems, on this very couch. She seemed to be a seamstress...

CHAMBERLAIN. Yeah, seamstress, on the couch... Oh, youth, youth, it was a wonderful time. (Valentine enters.) What do you want, Valentine? Please don't interfere.

VALENTIN leaves.

KING. She then died, didn't she? Looks like she drowned...

CHAMBERLAIN. But how! I remember like today. I went to the bridge, and from the bridge into the river... Oh, youth, youth, what could be more beautiful.

KING. Don't you think she looked like that squiggle?

CHAMBERLAIN. What are you, Your Majesty, because this one is a plump blonde, and that one was from lean, piquant brunettes.

KING. Yes! But she was also afraid. Swell. Mmmm. Just the same I was afraid. I was afraid to hell - a rogue!

CHAMBERLAIN. If this memory gives your Majesty even the slightest grief, it is better not to remember. It is better not to remember dead women. A dead woman is no longer a woman.

KING. She was afraid and, like this one, she was somehow - tortured. On this very couch. And it is necessary that there is always someone ... that ... when something ... Pah, pah! That's the devil, chamberlain, damn clearly remembered.

The QUEEN enters.

QUEEN. Congratulations! You just magically cheered her up! Just wonderful! The poor thing can't take a breath! What fly bit you, Ignatius? You ruined everything!

KING. Devilry, devilish! Don't come near me, ma'am.

QUEEN. What happened to you? Why can't I get close to you?

KING. From what? Why? Again - why? Am I not allowed to do what I want? Am I under guardianship? Not a master in your own house? Should I be accountable for everything? Well, why are you looking at me? What are you looking at me? All - why and how? Why did he scream? Because she reminds me of something!

CHAMBERLAIN. Don't talk about it! Your Majesty, why remember again!

KING. Yes, it reminded me of something, but about you! About you, my dear!

QUEEN. About me?

KING. Ha ha ha, why are you looking like that? Damn it, Margarita, I admit: yes, I flared up, but imagine, strange thing, I can’t look at this baby so that I don’t immediately remember something about you. I didn't mean to say, it's not exactly convenient, but since you're asking, I'll be honest. Sometimes it happens that one person resembles another, but ... how should I say it ... not quite dressed. And when I look at our prankster, how she moves ... how she digs, fiddles ... you understand how something is squelching inside her ... then immediately something reminds me of you, somehow suddenly arises the thought of you... in a negligee...

QUEEN. She reminds you of me... what? In a negligee?

KING. Exactly! Exactly what you are thinking right now! Well, tell me what? Tell me what you think now, and then it will become clear whether we are thinking about the same thing. Say in your ear.

QUEEN. Ignatius! What are you talking about?

KING. So I'm right, my queen! So we have our own secrets!

QUEEN. You forget!

KING. On the contrary - I remember! I remember! I remember evrything! Bye-bye! Mu Mu! (Suddenly exits.)

QUEEN. What does all of this mean?

The CHAMMERGUER runs out after the KING. The QUEEN stands in thought, puts her finger to her forehead. ISA enters and turns around in front of the mirror.

Stop flirting.

ISA (ashamed). Your Majesty...

QUEEN. You are flirting all the time. Since this... this... unfortunate woman appeared at the court, you all have been flirting endlessly. Come to me, dear lady. I need to ask you something.

ISA. Empress...

QUEEN. Look in my eyes. Admit it - you didn't tell anyone, you didn't blather to anyone about ... about my poems? Tell me frankly - I could not resist and told!

ISA. Your Majesty!

QUEEN. So you didn't tell anyone? About nothing? Then I do not understand how he could find out. He must have found my notebook under the mattress.

ISA. Who, your majesty?

QUEEN. The only reason is this, it cannot be otherwise. He meant only that! And now - tell me frankly, you can talk to me like I'm not a queen, I temporarily release you from all the conventions of the ceremony. Answer sincerely, when you look at Yvonne, nothing comes to your mind? No thoughts arise? Well, certain associations?.. Her gait, for example? Her nose? Look and generally the whole demeanor? Doesn't that remind you of anything...? Don't you think that some mocker could find some connection here with... with... with my poetry, in which I may have put too much poetry... my poetry... my confessional poetry?. Ah!

ISA. What? Your poetry, lady, and... and... How is it?

QUEEN. Damn it, my poetry! This world is too rough! Damn my impulses, ecstasies, dreams and confessions! You don't want to be sincere with me! Ha... he said: "in a negligee", why "in a negligee"? If I had not read poetry, I would not have said it - but were those my lines negligible? .. A disgusting word! You're not telling me the whole truth! Now swear that you won't say a word about what I've just told you. Swear! Swear before these candles. I'm not into jokes. Swear! And leave your false shame. Quick, get on your knees... and repeat after me: I swear...

The PRINCE enters.

PRINCE. Mom, I would like to talk to you. Ah, sorry. Looks like I interrupted your magic.

QUEEN. No, nothing, she straightens my shoe. They bought me too wide.

PRINCE. Why did the king frighten my bride?

QUEEN. Philip, just please, not in that tone!

PRINCE. And what? What tone should I use when my father, without any reason, attacks my fiancee, shouts at her - in the rudest form! If my fiancee was almost paralyzed with fright. If I can't move away even for a moment without you immediately starting to get up with her, what will you get into your head? It seems to me that I, on the contrary, am too calm.

VALENTIN enters.

Come out Valentine. Mom, I would like to talk to you alone.

QUEEN. I agree to talk to you, but first tell me what you want to talk about.

ISA comes out.

PRINCE. You are very circumspect, madam. I'm sorry, Mom, but I have to tell you something... something that might seem a little wild and eccentric. I don't even know how to put it better. Does she remind the king of some of your sins?

QUEEN. Who told you?

PRINCE. Father! He supposedly yelled at her because she reminds him of some of your intimate sins.

Enter KING and CHAMMERGUER.

QUEEN. Ignatius, what did you say to Philip?

KING. Have you spoken? I didn't say anything. He bothered me, so I told him. And he - what? How? Why? I told him the whole truth. Let it bother you rather than me.

QUEEN. Ignatius!

PRINCE. Just a minute... just a minute... Think about the position you're putting me in. Suddenly, for no apparent reason, my father attacks my fiancee. He scolds her with the last words, and when I ask him about the reason, which, as it seems to me, I have every right to, you tell me such things that I no longer understand what I should think about all this, how should I react to this? What happens? The mother sinned, and therefore the father attacks my bride?

KING. Yes, I pounce. Yes, I am a father who lashes out. So what, what, do you think something is wrong here? What am I because of my own sins? Margarita, why are you looking like that? Don't look at me or I'll start looking at you.

PRINCE. So, my parents are staring at each other because of my fiancée. The mother looks at the father, and the father looks at the mother, and all about the bride.

KING. Well, well, Philip, don't make a fool out of your father. Calm down.

QUEEN. Philip, your father got excited and told you God knows what, if only you would not torment him with questions. There is no need to discuss such nonsense any longer. Let's change the subject.

PRINCE. Majesty, I know that all this is nonsense.

QUEEN. Let's not talk about this. Absolute nonsense!

PRINCE. Nonsense, without a doubt. Just stupidity. Even idiotic. (Bows.)

QUEEN. Why did you bow to me?

PRINCE (in confidence). Because I myself look somewhat idiotic in front of her...

QUEEN. Are you idiotic?

PRINCE. You can't call it otherwise. I don't love her. And so I willingly believe that you, too, behave senselessly and idiotically towards her, because I myself behave in the same way towards her.

KING. Well, well, don't overdo it. (Prince bows.) Why are you bowing, donkey? What?

PRINCE (in confidence). With her, you can do whatever you want.

KING. What? What? Anything? I don't allow myself any of that. What do you want from me? Chamberlain... (Steps back.) This is... Mm... What kind of news is this?

QUEEN. Philip, what do these bows of yours mean? Stop bowing!

KING (aside). Scoundrel! Scoundrel!

CHAMBERLAIN. If you can afford anything with her, this does not mean that you, prince, can do the same with us. (Prince bows to him - he jumps back.) Not to me! Why are you bowing to me? I have nothing to do with everything that's going on! Please don't come near me!

PRINCE (in confidence). And anyone can get close to her. Grab her by the hair. By the ear!

KING (suddenly). Ha ha ha! (Pauses ashamedly.) This is... that one... Hmm...

CHAMBERLAIN. Prince, if you, Your Highness, touch me, then I...

PRINCE. And anyone can touch her! Believe me, you can do whatever your heart desires with it! She is such that everything is possible with her! Timid. Will not protest. And unsympathetic. And everything is possible. With her, you can act idiotic, disgusting, stupid, scary, cynical - as you want - as you please. (Bows to the Chamberlain.) Complete freedom... Complete freedom...

CHAMBERGER (jumps away). None of this concerns me! I don't care. (Bows to the Prince.) Goodbye... Goodbye... (Exits.)

KING. Scoundrel. Scoundrel. Well, well, son ... Why are you staring like that? Goodbye. (Bows.) Goodbye. Out! Out! (Exits.)

QUEEN. What does all of this mean?! Explain what it all means, why are you saying all this ... Goodbye, goodbye. (Exits.)

PRINCE (following the departing). Everything is possible! All! Who wants what. (To herself.) And she is sitting there, sitting somewhere in the corner and loves me - and loves me! Loves me! And everything is possible! Everything is possible! Who will like it! All! (Notices Iza, who wants to leave, getting up from the chair at the back of the set, where she sat during the entire scene. The prince approaches her and kisses her neck.) You can not stand on ceremony with her!

ISA. Let me go!

PRINCE. Oh! Yes, don't be shy! Everything is possible. (Kisses her on the lips.) Ah! What a delight...

IZA (trying to free herself). I'll scream now!

PRINCE. I tell you, do not be shy, everything is possible with her! Sorry! I didn't really want to. It's just like that... Excuse me, what have I done? He behaved like crazy.

ISA. Just audacity!

PRINCE. I beg you, do not tell anyone, because if the rumor reaches my bride, she will suffer ... She will suffer! Suffer, suffer, suffer!

ISA. Let me go, prince!

PRINCE (continuing to hold her). Now, now... Be patient. (Kisses.) Ah, what a nose, what lips! Don't go! Looks like I'm cheating on her! It's horrible! But it's wonderful! Oh, how easy it is for me! (Screaming) Valentine! Valentine!

ISA (breaking out). Please don't call anyone.

PRINCE. On the contrary, on the contrary, my golden...

VALENTIN enters.

Valentine, please ask Mr. Cyril to invite Mademoiselle Yvonne here! Fast!

VALENTIN exits.

I don't even think about letting you go. Only now, with you, I feel like I belong. Ah, what a pleasure to hold in the arms of a creature ... not disgusting. I will send you flowers. Ah, how easy. I must enjoy this ease. The lightness that I found again! I love you!

Enter KIRILL and YVONNE.

Cyril, now Isa is my bride!

KIRILL. Like this?!

PRINCE. Yvonne, I have to confess something to you. I just cheated on you with Isa. And you cease to be my bride. I'm very sorry, but there's nothing I can do. You are deprived of sex appeal, which Iza is endowed with in the highest degree. Do not be angry that I inform you of what happened in such a way, so unexpectedly, but I decided to take advantage of a certain ease that suddenly visited me thanks to you ... thanks to you, my treasure. (He kisses Iza's hand, then to Yvonne.) Well, why are you standing like that? Please, stay, stay as long as you like, I don't care! And goodbye! I'm leaving, I'm sailing, I'm leaving, I'm moving away, I'm breaking with you! And you can't stand anything!

KIRILL. She can't stand anything! Let it stay for at least ten years! This is joy!

PRINCE (to Iza). Sorry my precious, I forgot to ask you for consent. Don't refuse me. (Kissing her hand.) Ah, every such touch heals me. Now I will give all the necessary orders. No need to hide from the world that we got engaged. And parents will be happy. Chamberlain ... our glorious chamberlain! Courtiers... what a relief for everyone. After all, the atmosphere at the court really became unbearable. (To Yvonne.) Well, what are you all standing around for? In my opinion, everything has already been clarified between us. What are you waiting for, dear.

KIRILL. She won't move on her own.

PRINCE. Call this, her lover, let him take her to himself, or, in any case, take her away from here and take her to her place of permanent residence.

KIRILL. I'll bring it right away and we'll send it. This minute, Philip! Just ... look, no matter how she survives something here!

PRINCE. Don't be afraid!

KIRILL exits.

And you can stand as long as you like, you will no longer be able to put me in a stupid position. I became different. Changed the tone, and immediately everything changed! Here you stand, like a reproach of conscience, but I don't care! Well, stop if you want! Ha, ha, ha. However, you love to be hurt because you are absolutely devoid of sex appeal. You don’t love yourself, you are your own enemy, and therefore you subconsciously provoke and turn everyone against each other, and everyone feels like a robber and a scoundrel in relation to you. But now, even if you stood here for a year, your gloom and tragedy will not be able to overcome my carelessness and lightness. (Laughs playfully towards Yvonne and whirls along with Isa.)

ISA. Maybe it's better not to talk to her like that? Have mercy, Philip.

PRINCE. No, no, no mercy. Only frivolity! I already know her - I have experience. Firstly, while she is waiting here, you need to constantly say something, and secondly, you should say exactly the worst, and in a light, cheerful tone. The main thing is to say all the most unpleasant, obscene things in an innocent, dismissive tone. This deprives her of the opportunity to express herself, deprives her silence of the power of influence, and the fact that she sticks out here ceases to matter at all. All this takes her to a sphere where she is helpless. You don't have to worry, I'm safe now. Breaking the connection with a person is damn easy, it is, first of all, a matter of changing the tone. Let it cost as much as it likes, please, let it stand and look ... But by the way, we will leave. That's right, it just didn't occur to me that I could pick up and leave. If it is worth it, then we leave. (Yvonne leans in.) Don't you dare bow to me!

YVONNE. I don't bow.

PRINCE. Put it down! What did you pick up from the floor? What is this? Hair? What is he to you? Whose hair is this? Iza's hair. Put it down - do you want to take it? For what?

YVONNE (silent).

Enter KIRILL and INNOKENTY.

INNOCENT. Sorry, but that's not how they do it! You, prince, made a girl fall in love with you, and now you are pushing her away! Royal whims! You made her unhappy! I protest!

PRINCE. What? What? Are you protesting?

INNOCENT. Sorry, I'm trying to protest. (Under the menacing gaze of the Prince, he suddenly sits up.)

PRINCE. See how this man sat down on his protest.

KIRILL. He sat down like a dog on his tail. Well, on the road! Take your beauty.

PRINCE. Stop! Let me give you hair!

KIRILL. What hair, prince?

PRINCE. Yvonne, give back the hair! Let her give her hair!

ISA. I have enough hair. Philip...

PRINCE. No, no, let him give! I can't bear it if she has... left... this hair! Give it back! (Takes away hair.) He took it! So what about what you took away? She is not this hair - she has enclosed us both! (To Iza.) We ended up there, in it. She has. In her possession. Come out everyone! I will come now. Kirill!

Everyone comes out except PRINCE and KIRILL.

Keep her in the castle. Don't let her leave. Tell them not to publicize our breakup just yet. Let everything remain as it was for a while.

KIRILL. I knew she would be up to something. You start again!

PRINCE. On the contrary, I want to end it once and for all. Do not be scared. I'll have to... (Pointing to her throat.)

KIRILL. What?! Whom?!

PRINCE. Yvonne.

KIRILL. Don't go crazy, for heaven's sake. After all, everything is already settled. You broke up with her. I will send her home. She won't be anymore.

PRINCE. It won't be here, but it will be somewhere else. Wherever she is, she always will be. I'll be here and she'll be there... Brrr... I don't want to. It's better to kill once.

KIRILL. But you are cured!

PRINCE. I give you my word, I'm completely cured. And fell in love with Isa. Managed to break away from the suffering of this sufferer. But, Cyril, we ended up in her Iza and I - we are in her, and she will be there, in herself, with us ... above us ... she will act with us in her own way, in her own way, you understand? Pah, pah! Don't want. I'll kill her. What will change when she leaves? Yes, he will leave, but he will carry us away with him ... Yes, of course, I know that one shouldn’t act like this, that one shouldn’t kill ... believe me, I’m in my right mind, I understand what I’m saying, I’m not exaggerating at all, not in that , not the other way... (With a slight uneasiness.) You must admit that I don't look like a madman.

KIRILL. Do you want to kill her in the literal sense of the word, that is, just take and kill? But that's a crime.

PRINCE. Just one more prank, just one more eccentric prank, so that later they would not exist at all. In addition, everything will be done absolutely smoothly, coolly, soberly, easily - you will see for yourself, it only seems to you that it is scary, but in fact it is a simple operation, nothing more. It is very easy to kill such a fly, she suggests herself. Do you promise to help me?

KIRILL. What is she pushing you for... scoundrel!

PRINCE. We have reached a dead end with her and now we need to get out. And my betrothal to Isa should be kept secret for the time being. Don't tell anyone about it. Let up tomorrow everything will remain as it is. Tomorrow I will consider the most suitable way its elimination. But you have to help me, because I'm alone... I don't want to be alone, I have to be with someone, I can't do this alone.

Rooms in the castle. To a signal of fanfare, the KING enters, followed by three Dignitaries.

KING (absently). Well, good, good. You only bore me. I have more important things to worry about. What else do you have there?

CHANCELLOR. Your Majesty, it is necessary to decide in what costume our Ambassador Extraordinary and Minister Plenipotentiary should be sent to France? In a tailcoat or in a uniform?

KING (gloomy). Let him ride naked. (The dignitaries are surprised.) Excuse me, I'm a little distracted today. Let him ride what he wants, as long as it is at his own expense.

HOFF MARSHAL. Your Majesty, this evening there is a gala dinner in honor of Prince Philip's chivalrous in its democratic betrothal to a representative of the lower strata of society, Mademoiselle Yvonne Zopek. Perhaps you, Your Majesty, would be so kind as to express any special wishes regarding the menu?

KING. Give them all the garbage ... (The dignitaries are surprised.) That is - I wanted to say, delicacies ... Why are you staring at me like that?

Dignitaries. This is the decision we expected, convinced of the deepest wisdom of Your Majesty.

HIGH JUDGE. Your Majesty, one more thing - here is a petition for clemency for old Khlipek, supported by positive resolutions from all twelve instances.

KING. What? How to pardon? Execute him!

Dignitaries. Your Majesty!

KING. Execute, I said. What surprises you? The right of pardon belongs to me. And I do not agree to pardon. Let it die! Death to a scoundrel, but not because he is a scoundrel, but because I... Hm... Togo... What did I want to say? We are all rascals. And you too. Stop staring at me. Look wherever you want, but not at me. I'm fed up with your constant staring. I command that from today no one dares to stare at me. And then everyone just does what they stare and stare.

Dignitaries. This is the decision we expected, convinced of the deepest wisdom of Your Majesty.

KING. Well, well, now get out. I'm tired of your chatter. And don't be surprised by anything. So that no one is surprised. I was too lenient with you! I'll show everyone what I'm capable of. You will walk along the line. (The dignitaries bow.) Well, well, don't you dare bow! I forbid you to bow! Everyone just to bow! Out! Go away!

Alarmed, the Dignitaries exit, the KING looks around suspiciously, then hides behind the couch. The CHAMMERGUER enters, carefully looks around the room and, as if unwillingly and secretly from himself, begins to rearrange the furniture with anger, moves a chair, turns away the corner of the carpet, turns the books on the shelf upside down, throws a stone from a plum on the floor, etc. Notices the KING.

CHAMBERLAIN. ABOUT!

KING. Hm... hm...

CHAMBERLAIN. Your Majesty?!

KING. Yes I. What are you doing here?

CHAMBERLAIN. I? Nothing.

KING (gloomy). He must have been surprised to find me here. (With difficulty he crawls out of his hiding place.) Be surprised, be surprised - now the fashion has gone like this: everyone only does what is surprised ... I hid here, well, you know, I hid.

CHAMBERLAIN. Your Majesty are hiding? Who are you waiting for?

KING. Nobody. Specially - no one. Hiding just for fun. (Laughs.) You see, this room adjoins the chambers of our swell. And Margarita also sometimes passes here, and even sits down. Here you can see something. That's what I wanted to see. See with your own eyes.

CHAMBERLAIN. For what?

KING. To Margaret.

CHAMBERLAIN. To her majesty?

KING. On her majesty - you know, to see what she is, what she does when no one sees. We have lived together for so many years, and I, in fact, know nothing about her. She has a bad conscience. Um... Or maybe she - maybe she - maybe she ... Yes, what is there, what she just can't do. Everything can. When I think about it, my head is spinning. Maybe she's cheating on me? It's probably changing. Or maybe something else. Yes all! Anything! - I want to see her sins...

CHAMBERLAIN. Your Majesty at the couch...

KING. Shut up donkey. I deliberately hid behind the couch so that no one would notice me. Behind the couch you can! (Laughs.) You can! And you, chamberlain, why are you here? Why do you rearrange the furniture and, in general, set about this still life with such love?

CHAMBERLAIN. This? Just...

KING. Just? If so, then speak up! Me too, just like that.

CHAMBERLAIN. Well, I walk around the castle and so a little ...

KING. What?

Chamberlain (laughs). I create trouble.

KING. Difficulties?

CHAMBERLAIN. Here is an example of a chair. It's harder to sit on if it's standing like this. (Laughs.) You can sit by ...

KING. And why are you, chamberlain, tossing bones?

CHAMBERLAIN. I make walking difficult.

KING. Walking? (Grimly.) Ah, that means she's finished you too ... our squiggle. Well, well, nothing, nothing.

CHAMBERLAIN. I, Your Majesty, am a person of a certain social level, a secular person, and therefore I can’t stand some ... Your Majesty, if this continues, I don’t know what all this impudence, impudence will lead to ... some kind of licentiousness ...

KING. Yes, yes, there is a lot of arrogance. Debauchery, ha ha! Have you forgotten, old man? (Pushes him.)

CHAMBERLAIN. I don't want to remember anything!

KING. No, no, he bowed to you too! Well, well, nothing, nothing. The licentiousness is growing, the insolence... All right, all right. Chamberlain, what if she passes here ... and I jump out to meet her. Jump out and scare, ha ha! I'll scare! It's possible with her! (Laughs.) You can! I'll frighten and... and... well, let's say, I'll suffocate! I will kill! We've already killed one.

CHAMBERLAIN. Your majesty, fi donc!

KING. I'm telling you, you can do it with her. Everything is possible with her.

CHAMBERLAIN. Out of the question, your majesty. We just missed it! Fear God - and so the whole court is already in a fever from gossip and gossip. His Majesty, His Serene Highness, jumping out from behind the couch... No, no! Never has the strictest observance of tact and other rules of secular communication been so necessary as under present circumstances. Although, it's true, I also had a certain idea, (Laughs.) Something came to mind. (Laughs.)

KING. Why are you laughing so idiotically?

CHAMBERLAIN. This is me about my idea. (Laughs.) After all, today Your Majesties are organizing a solemn banquet on the occasion of this most unfortunate betrothal. What if you serve some fish to the table, bony fish, with sharp bones, crucian carp, for example, now it’s the most fishing for crucian carp, so serve crucian carp in sour cream.

VALENTIN enters.

Please come out!

KING (gloomy). Go away! Karasey?

CHAMBERLAIN. Karasey. (Laughs.)

KING. What's with the crucians?

CHAMBERLAIN. Yes, Your Majesty, it was crucian carp at a solemn dinner party. Perhaps you, Your Majesty, also noticed that she, than more people, the more lost. And yesterday, when I looked at her, well, a little... arrogantly, condescendingly... so she almost choked on potatoes, ordinary potatoes. What if, Your Majesty, submit carp, and then - strictly, arrogantly. (Laughs.) Crucian is a difficult fish ... bony ... At a gala reception, in the presence of many strangers, it is easy to choke on it.

KING. Chamberlain... (Looks at him.) All this is a bit... stupid... Carp?

CHAMBERGER (offended). I know it's stupid. If it wasn't stupid, I wouldn't say.

KING. Chamberlain, but... if she really... if... Do you think she really can choke?..

Chamberlain (haughtily). Your Majesty admit such a possibility? But that's stupid. And even if, by a strange coincidence, such a misfortune had happened... what would we have in common... with such stupidity?

KING. Yes, but... we're talking about this right now, aren't we?

CHAMBERLAIN. Oh, our conversation... so, by the way... (Examines his nails.)

KING. By the way? No! So we will do it! With her, if strictly, arrogantly, everything can be done - any stupidity, the most stupid, such that no one even dares to suspect anything. Karasi? Why not carp? Chamberlain, I ask why not carps?

CHAMBERLAIN. Carp, carp...

KING. But why not carp? Or acne? Why? Why? Okay, let carp. Hm... (With fear.) Strictly? Sharp? Down?

CHAMBERLAIN. That's it! Most Serene Sovereign in all his greatness.

KING. Yes, yes, in all its glory. Let there be a lot of lights, a lot of people and elegant costumes ... Shine, festivity ... If you shout at her with arrogance, she will choke ... For sure. Will choke to death. And no one will guess, because it is too stupid - and haughtily, haughtily, and not stealthily, majestically, in all its splendor. We will kill her from above. What? Um... Wait, let's hide, the queen is coming.

CHAMBERLAIN. But I...

KING. Hide quickly, I want to watch the queen.

Both hide behind the couch. The QUEEN enters, looks around - she has a vial in her hand.

(Aside.) And what is this?

CHAMBERLAIN. Shh...

The queen takes a few steps towards Yvonne's room, stops - takes out a small notebook from behind her corset - lets out a low moan, covers her face with her palm.

KING (aside). What is this book of grief?

CHAMBERGER (aside). Shh...

QUEEN (reading). I'm all alone. (Repeats.) Yes - I am so alone, completely alone, I am alone ... (Reads.) Nobody knows the secret of my womb. (Spoken.) Nobody knows my womb. Nobody knows, oh oh oh (Is reading.)

Notebook-girlfriend, oh, only you

Worthy of knowing my dreams

And chaste dreams

My unshed tears

Only you will know about them!

(Speaks.) Only you will know about them, only you will know. Ooo! (He covers his face.) How scary, scary... To kill, to kill... (Looks at the vial.) Poison, poison...

KING (aside). I?

QUEEN (with a grimace of pain). Only you will know. (Waving his hand.) Read on. Reading! May reading give me the strength to commit a monstrous deed. (Is reading.)

For you people, I'm on the throne

I'm in the crown.

Ah, you do not know the flame,

What rages in my womb.

You think I'm proud

Prudent and firm.

And I just want to be flexible all the time.

(spoken) Flexible, oh! Ooo! Flexible. And I wrote it! It is mine! My! Kill, kill! (Is reading.)

I want to be flexible, like viburnum,

And flexible, like a mountain ash,

And sensual like Messalina

To bend, all burning,

Elastic to be like the wind of May,

I just want flexibility! I don't need greatness!

Oh, how I long for flexibility, defying decency!

Flexibility, oh! Flexibility! Ahh! A! Burn, destroy! Kalina, mountain ash, Messalina ... How scary! This is what I wrote! This is mine, mine and, come what may, must remain mine! Oh, only now I see how monstrous it is! And, therefore, Ignatius ... read! Oh-oh! But there is a resemblance - there is a resemblance ... with the way she digs into herself, how something squishes inside her ... Oh yes, of course, she evokes terrible associations with my poetry! Scammer! She exposes me! It's me! I! It is mine! There are similarities between us. Oh, how she laid bare and exposed all my innermost! Anyone who looks at her will immediately find a resemblance to Margarita. Anyone who looks at her will immediately understand what I really am, as if reading my works. Enough! Let her die! Yes, Margarita, you must destroy her! Get to work, killer vial! She cannot exist in this world, the hour has come - otherwise this insidious relationship between us can be discovered by anyone. I do not want to become a victim of bullying, harassment, ridicule, aggressiveness through the fault of this scammer. Destroy! Come on, let's go quietly into her room with a bottle, add a few drops to her medicine... No one will guess! Nobody will know. She is a sickly girl, everyone will think that she herself died, just like that ... Who would ever think that it was me. After all, I'm a queen! (He walks.) No, no, it's not time yet. You can't go like that. I look like usual - and in this form go to the murder? No, I need to change my appearance. At least tousle the hair... Hair... Quite a bit, not too defiantly, just a little, so as not to look like always. Oh, like this... Yes, yes!..

KING (aside). Shh...

QUEEN. But how can I go in disheveled? Ooo! It might give you away! Suddenly someone will notice that your hair is in a mess ... Stop talking to yourself. She's probably talking to herself too. Margarita, stop talking to yourself - you can expose yourself. (Looks in the mirror.) Oh, how this mirror took me by surprise. I need to find the most repulsive features in my face, only then can I enter her. Stop talking to yourself. They can hear. I can't keep quiet. Do all murderers talk to themselves before committing a crime? Well, what's wrong with that? What's wrong with that... (Examines himself.) Let me have a strange and sinister look. Make a face, make a face, Margarita! That's it, that's it, now let's go! You are with me, I am with you. That is, how it is - you are with me, I am with you - because I will go alone. Make a face! Went! Remember all your verses and go! Remember all the secret, flexible dreams and go! Remember all the viburnums, all your mountain ash and go! Oh, oh, oh, I'm coming, I'm coming! Ah, I can't bring myself to - it's all pure madness! Now, just a minute - let's make up some more, and this one more ... (He stains his face with ink.) So, now, with stains, it will be easier ... Now I have become different. Wait, it might give you away! Let's go! Death to the informer! I can not! Let's honor more! I have to read more. (Pulls out poetry.) Let's read it, it will excite us, increase the thirst for murder.

KING (jumps out). Well Margaret!

QUEEN. Ignatius!

KING. Here you got it! Show me! (Tries to tear out the notebook.)

QUEEN. Let me in!

KING. Show me! Show me! Oh you killer! I want to get to know your sins better! Show me and we'll make a new one Honeymoon! Show me, poisoner!

QUEEN. Oh! (Falls senseless.)

CHAMBERLAIN. Water! She's stupid!

KING. Well, you see how things turned out! Dreams of flexibility and therefore wants to kill the swell! But it doesn't matter anymore. I killed her a long time ago anyway.

QUEEN (recovering). Killed? Who do you kill...

KING. I drowned her! With a chamberlain. We drowned her together with the chamberlain ...

CHAMBERLAIN. Water! Here is the water!

QUEEN. Drowned? Yvonne uh...

KING. Stupid. Not Yvonne, but that doesn't matter. Not Yvonne, another one, well, there's one. A long time ago. Now you know what's in me. Do you know now? Compared to my sins, your stupid poems, which you are also ashamed of, are nothing. I killed that one and now I'm going to kill that one. I'll kill Tsatsu too.

QUEEN. You will kill tsa...

KING. Yes, now I'll kill the swell. And her, too, if all goes well. And hers too, and it will always be like this... Always someone, somewhere, sometime someone... Always like this... Not that one, then another, if not that one, then again this one, and always like that. - resolutely, majestically - with aplomb, confidently. To catch up with fear, and then, that one ... (To the Chamberlain.) Give me water. (Drinks.) Yes, I'm getting old ... the years are not the same ...

QUEEN. I will not let! Ignacy, I won't allow it!

KING. Let me, mother, let me ... let me, you also allow yourself. Everyone allows himself something and therefore must allow others ...

YVONNA enters, seeing those present, wants to return, but does not dare and goes into her room. From that moment on, everyone speaks in an undertone.

QUEEN. Ignacy, I do not give consent, I do not want, I do not allow, Ignacy!

CHAMBERLAIN. For God's sake, be quiet!

KING. Shut up, stupid. The deed will be done ... Do you think I will sneak up on her, like you ... No, I will openly, with arrogance, kill her - haughtily, with chic, majestically - and everything will look so stupid that no one will guess . Ha-ha, Margarita, one must kill from above, it is impossible to stealthily. And you first of all wash your face, otherwise you look like a crazy person. And, secondly, take care of the banquet that we are arranging today - it's time already ... And don't forget - they brought carp for a snack. I like to eat crucian carp, crucian carp in sour cream. good fish. Exquisite.

QUEEN. Karasi? Karasi? (To the Chamberlain, joyfully.) Yes, he has gone mad! Thank God I'm crazy!

KING. Shut up, I'm out of my mind. Give carp.

Chamberlain (to the Queen). Your Majesty, carp in sour cream is a wonderful snack. I don’t see any reason that would prevent the submission of crucian carp.

QUEEN. There will be no carp! Ignacy, don't drive me crazy, I won't serve any carp. What kind of fantasy are these crucians? I tell you, there will be no crucian carp, why is it suddenly crucian carp, why are there some crucian carp right now? There will be no carp!

KING. What are these whims? (To the Chamberlain.) Give me the crown. I'll show you.

The chamberlain presents the crown.

QUEEN. Ignatius, what is this for? Take off the crown - Ignacy, why?! Ignacy?!

KING. Margarita, since I said that you should serve crucian carp, it means that they were to be served. And do not argue, otherwise you will get it from me ... but I can, if I want, I can, because there are many sins on me - I can do everything, wife, tremble before me, that I have sins! I am the king of sins, you understand, the king of stupidity, sins, lawlessness, groaning!

QUEEN (amazed). Ignatius!

KING (calming down). Well, well, well ... Order the carp to be served. And invite the highest dignitaries, the most sophisticated, the most experienced, from those practitioners who know how to catch up with fear, paralyze a person like a hundred thousand devils. (Quieter.) Margarita, leave your timidity, shame, do you understand all your fears? And enough of this poetry, flexibility, viburnum, mountain ash ... You are no longer a primrose, you are a lady, a queen, well, well. You should not bend, let them bend before you - well, well. Wash yourself, you slut, otherwise you look like a scarecrow. Put on a brocade dress - show, mother, what you are capable of! Come on! Get together, demonstrate all your elegance, grace, dignity, tact, manners, that's why I keep you, and order your bastards to also dress up, whoever can. Well, well, go - did you understand everything? And to be solemn! The reception should be festive, with ladies, and not with disheveled. Invite your guests and tell them to lay the tables, and don’t let your head hurt about the rest, I’ll take care of the rest myself! Arrogant, condescending - majestic! Go, go, cook! (The Queen, who at the end of the King's monologue covered her face with her hands, exits.) Chamberlain...

CHAMBERLAIN. your majesty?

KING (quieter, gloomily). Bow to me... I want you to bow to me...

Chamberlain (listening). Someone is coming.

KING (hard). Let's hide then.

Hiding behind the couch. Stealthily, enter: PRINCE with a knife in his hand, followed by KIRILL with a basket.

PRINCE. Where did she go?

KIRILL (peeping through a door in the back of the scenery). Shh. She is here.

PRINCE. What is he doing?

KIRILL. It catches flies.

PRINCE. And how did you get it?

KIRILL. Yawns.

PRINCE (holding a knife). Well, let's try then... One, two, three... Check if anyone is coming, get the basket ready...

Kirill opens the basket, the Prince creeps up to the door.

KING (aside, to Chamberlain). Oh, so my son too!

KIRILL (looking from the side at the Prince). Philip, stop it! Philip, I'm going to make a fuss!

PRINCE. Nerves?

KIRILL. Simply unimaginable! You're with a knife, sneaking up on that slut! (Breaks into low laughter.) None of this will work - no, it will not work! .. Kill? To kill such a?! .. And also this basket! Also a basket!

PRINCE. Stop it! (Puts down the knife.) The basket is needed for technical reasons.

KIRILL. You yourself do not understand what you are doing - you do not see yourself from the outside.

PRINCE. Stop it, finally!

KIRILL (peeping in). Falls asleep. Seems to be asleep...

PRINCE. Did you fall asleep?

KIRILL. Shh. As if... Nodding off... On an armchair...

PRINCE (peeking). Now or never! If it doesn't hurt now... Here, try it!

KIRILL. I?

PRINCE. It’s easier for you - you are an outsider for her, you are on an equal footing with her, you are not the object of her adoration, she does not love you. Cyril, do it for me. Just a moment... It's like an operation, a procedure - she won't feel it. She won’t know anything, and remember, at the very moment when you do this, she will already cease to exist, everything will happen apart from her, it’s easy - only we will act, unilaterally, it won’t affect her at all ...

KIRILL. The easier it is, the more difficult it is. (Takes a knife.)

PRINCE. No no no!

KIRILL. No?

PRINCE. It looks like you're about to slaughter a chicken.

KIRILL. Isn't it possible? After all, it would seem that it is possible, but it turns out that it is impossible. What the hell is this? Probably because it is too painful, weakened. That would be a fat, ruddy woman, but she is pale ... A hand does not rise on a pale one ...

PRINCE. Someone is watching here.

KIRILL. This is what I'm looking at.

PRINCE. No, someone is looking at us - someone sees everything.

KIRILL. This I see.

PRINCE. Yes, you look at me, I look at you. Go away, I'd rather be on my own. I'll do everything myself. Just a procedure, albeit a monstrous one, but a procedure. I'd rather be monstrous for a moment than for a lifetime. Stand outside the door, I'm on my own... (Kirill exits.) On my own. For her, this will be a deliverance... An end to all her suffering - and mine too... This is an expedient procedure, expedient... Hm... (Looks around, takes the knife, puts it down again.) Kirill!

KING (aside, very excited). Ehh, slob!

KIRILL. What's happened? (Returns.)

PRINCE. Alone is even worse. A person, when he is alone, begins to burst, he grows ... to size ... (Listens.) What is this?

KIRILL. Breathe. (Both listen.)

PRINCE. Breathing... (Looks in the door.) Yes! So she breathes - she lives there in her insides - up to her own ears ... immersed, closed in herself ... No, nothing will work ... (Takes a knife.) It would seem, to plunge into the body ... But how difficult it is... I feel a terrible lightness, but it is precisely in this lightness that the terrible difficulty lies.

ISA enters.

ISA (seeing the knife). What is this? (Looks in the door.) Murder?

PRINCE and KIRILL. Shh...

ISA. Murder... Do you want to be a killer?

PRINCE. Be quiet! Don't interfere! This is where I handle my personal business. When I'm done, I'll be there. Get out of here!

ISA. Are you here too? And are you involved in this?

KIRILL. Nonsense! Philip, let's get out of here, it's all nonsense! Let's leave this thing!

KING (aside). Stupidity! Be brave!

ISA. Let's get out of here!

PRINCE (looks in). Asleep.

ISA. And let him sleep. What do you care if she sleeps. Philip, I'll sleep too... tonight.

PRINCE. Quiet. I sighed!

ISA. Philip and I will sigh... tonight. Stop giving her so much attention. Because I'm here! Stop dealing with her, stop killing her... Let's go.

PRINCE. She is dreaming of something. I wonder what?

ISA. Let me dream. I'd rather tell you what I dreamed. In a dream I saw you. Let's go to.

PRINCE. And she, probably, we will shoot! She sees us in her dreams! Me, you. We are there, inside.

ISA. Where? How is it inside?

PRINCE. Well, in her gut. Do you hear how she sleeps heavily? How painfully sighs? How painfully she works inside herself, how there, inside, we plunge into her, and how she does with us whatever she pleases, I wonder what she does to us there, how she takes revenge on us ...

ISA. Are you talking like crazy again? Can't you stop?

PRINCE (still in a whisper). I am normal, but I cannot remain normal if someone else is abnormal. Okay, I'll be normal, and you'll be normal too, so what if someone else, abnormal, will play along with us, normal, on such a small pipe, tra-la-la - and we will dance to it and we will cry...

ISA. Philip, are you saying this after what happened between us last night?

PRINCE (listening). Snores.

PRINCE. Snores.

ISA. No, you're overstepping the bounds of decency.

KING (aside). Steps over! Well, go ahead! Let him cross. Wow! Wow! Step over!

PRINCE (involuntarily answering the King). I am unable to cross. But what is it? Who said that? What is going on in this room? Look how wild everything looks here - all this furniture. (Kicks the chair.)

KING. wildly! Wow! Wow!

CHAMBERLAIN. Shh!

KIRILL. Either we finally kill her, or let's get out of here, I can no longer stand like this, with this basket, I'd better leave, or even run away. I'll run away from the castle. I can't hang around here like a third wheel anymore - I can't.

PRINCE. I must cross! Must!

KING. Be brave!

ISA. Kiss Me. (To Kirill.) Let him kiss me.

PRINCE (listening). Yawned!

ISA. Enough. I'm leaving.

KIRILL. Prince, kiss her. Damn it, do something to get him to kiss you. Let him kiss you!

KING. Let him kiss! Uh, uh! Be brave!

CHAMBERLAIN. Shh!

ISA. I don't intend to beg for kisses. I don't want to stand indefinitely with a stupid basket and a knife under the door of this unfortunate woman. Enough. I'm leaving forever. Enough for me.

PRINCE. Do not leave me! Isa, I'll kiss you. Wait!

ISA (pushing the Prince away). Don't want! Please let me go! I don't want to be here, on order, under the door, completely pointless, with this basket, with this knife. How can you kiss here? Leave me.

KING (remaining at the couch). So it! Forward! Let's!

PRINCE. Keep cool. First of all - composure, otherwise we will all be completely asleep. Hush, or she'll wake up... Iza, wait, don't be so harsh. I can't lose you. Don't react to all this nonsense. Yes, I agree, a kiss in these circumstances is pointless, and yet we will kiss, no matter what, we will kiss as if it were completely natural ... For God's sake, if we cannot remain normal, then at least we will pretend that we are normal, otherwise we will not get out of here. And I see no other way out than a kiss, maybe it will bring us back to normal, give us the strength to escape from this place. (Hugs her.) I love you. Say that you love me. Do you love me!

ISA. I will not say! I won't say anything! Let...

PRINCE. She loves Me! And I love her!

YVONNE appears at the door, rubbing her eyes. The KING, in great agitation, leans out from behind the couch, the CHAMMERGUER tries to restrain him.

KING. So her!

ISA. Philip!

PRINCE (ardently, passionately). Philip! Philip!.. I love you!

KIRILL. Philip, she's awake!

KING (loudly). Okay Philippe, well done! So she needs it! Don't give up! Death to her! Grab her! Grab the chick!

CHAMBERLAIN. Stop his majesty.

ISA. Let's run from here.

KING. Do not scream! Get me out of here. (Getting out with difficulty.) All stiffened. The old bones are numb. (To the Prince.) Get moving! Move! Grab her! Muddlers! Now we will finish it! Grab her, I say! Well, - Philip, Chamberlain, - I'll go from the other side! Take her, dude!

The QUEEN enters ball gown, footmen bring in the tables set for dinner, behind them the guests bring in lighting.

Stop! So nothing will come of it! Forgot about crucians! She needs to be haughty! Above, not below! With dignity, majestic! Baffle, and then that ... Forward! Get to work, Margaret! Forward! (To the guests.) Please! .. Please! .. Come in, gentlemen! Philip, straighten your collar, smooth your hair ... haughtily, with dignity, my son! Grab it! (To the Chamberlain.) Give me the crown.

PRINCE. What's going on here?

CHAMBERLAIN. Nothing special, just dinner!

KING (to guests). We cordially welcome! Please, welcome.

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah! (Bowing.) Your Majesty!

QUEEN. Please. Welcome!

GUESTS. Your Majesty! (Bow.)

KING (to guests). For business! Come on! Grab it! And haughtily, gentlemen, with superiority, chamberlain, offer each a place according to the title and let the more worthy stab the less worthy, and the less worthy - the more worthy, that is, I wanted to say, let the more worthy experience a sense of legitimate pride at the sight of the less worthy, and let the less worthy draw from the more worthy the stimulus and striving for more and more fruitful efforts in noble rivalry. And put my future daughter-in-law in front of us, because today's reception is arranged in her honor.

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah! (Bow.)

QUEEN. But, regardless of place in the hierarchy of places, let each one bloom with the luxuriance of his whole being under the sun of our favor. Let the ladies show what they are capable of, and let the gentlemen show the ladies! With brilliance, gentlemen, with chic, elegant, bright and elegant!

KING. Yes, yes - grab ... that is, that ... Forward! Have a seat!

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah! (Bow.)

The King and Queen sit down.

CHAMMERGUER (to Yvonne). Please, mademoiselle, sit down.

YVONNE doesn't move, the CHAMBER GUARD continues coldly.

Be kind, sit down... (Seats Yvonne.) And here the prince will sit... I beg you, prince... And here is their excellency, here is their eminence, here is their excellency the countess, and here is our magnificent, our priceless, our refined ... (Brings some old man up, breaking into a smile.) Ai-ai-ai!

KING. As I said, this modest but exquisite dinner we arranged for death, that is, rather, in honor of our future daughter-in-law, and today we decided to honor her with the title of Princess of Burgundy in partibus infidelium. So, she is the heroine of today's feast. Look how sweetly she smiles.

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah! (Muffled applause.)

KING (begins to take food). A little bony, lousy, but tasty ... Fish, I wanted to say, this one ... um ... (Puts fish on a plate.)

QUEEN (serving food). A little old, but in this sauce it looks decent, and dignity, I must admit, is much closer to me than what is usually bashfully called poetry. Perhaps I am not sentimental, but (with arrogance.) I can not stand everything that even remotely reminds me of viburnum or mountain ash. I am closer to older women, ladies in true meaning this word!

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah!

CHAMMERGUER (serving food). The fish is modest in appearance, but in principle, in its very essence, it is unusually, simply incredibly aristocratic, suffice it to say that its bones are extremely thin! And what a great sauce! It seems to be sour cream, but at the same time immeasurably thinner, more refined than sour cream! And what a taste - spicy, spicy, spectacular, paradoxical! I am sure that all those present will appreciate it accordingly, since such a refined society has never gathered around this table!

GUESTS. Ah-ah-ah!

KING (to Yvonne). What is it - we do not taste good? (threateningly) Don't like it?

CHAMBERLAIN. What's the matter with you, mademoiselle, no appetite?

GUESTS (sadly). ABOUT!

YVONNE (starts to eat).

KING (to Yvonne, grimly). Just eat carefully, otherwise you can choke! Karas, he only looks like - nothing special, but in fact ...

CHAMMERGUER (to Yvonne). His Majesty deigned to note that while eating you should be careful, otherwise you can choke. (Sharply.) The danger is great! This is a tough fish!

KING (threateningly). Dangerous fish, I tell you!

GUESTS (astonished). Oh! (Everyone stops eating, silence.)

QUEEN (with dignity). Eh bien, Yvonne, vous ne manges pas, ma chere?

Chamberlain (inserting a monocle into his eye). Are you neglecting? Do you neglect His Majesty's crucian carp?

KING (threateningly). What's happened?!

YVONNE (starts to eat alone).

KING (gets up, points threateningly at Yvonne). Choking! Choking! Bone! She has a bone in her throat!! Bone, I tell you! Well!!!

YVONNE (choking).

GUESTS (amazed, jump up). Save! Water! Tap on the back!

QUEEN (amazed). Save!

GUESTS. Ah, unfortunate! What trouble! Catastrophe! Dead body! Dead! Let's not interfere! (They all leave, leaving the body in sight.)

PRINCE. Died?

CHAMBERLAIN. The bone choked.

PRINCE. Oh! Bone. Looks like she really died.

Silence.

QUEEN (nervously, as if a little ashamed). Ignatius, mourning will have to be taken care of. You don't have a black suit. You have recovered, all your suits have become small.

KING. Why no suit? If I order, it will.

QUEEN. Yes, but you must send for a tailor.

KING (surprised). For a tailor? Yes, that's right... (Rubs his eyes.) That's right, tailor Solomon, men's confection... (Looks at Yvonne.) What? Died? Seriously?

QUEEN (after a pause). We'll all die!

KING (after a pause). Yes, do something. Something needs to be done about it. To say something. Somehow break this silence! Philip... of that... be of good cheer. Nothing can be done - she died.

QUEEN (strokes the Prince on the head). Your mother will not leave you, my son.

PRINCE. What are you talking about?

Chamberlain (to the servants). Come here, you need to take it out and put it on the bed for now. Let one of you run and prepare everything. And call Petrashek immediately. Someone needs to run right now. funeral service Petrashek, we can't cope without Petrashek. Urgently call Petrashek, this is the most important thing. (Servants approach the body.) Wait a minute, I'll kneel. (Does it.)

KING. Yes, that's right... (Kneels down.) He's right. Gotta get on your knees.

Everyone kneels down except the Prince.

In fact, it should have been done right away.

PRINCE. I'm sorry. How so?

CHAMBERLAIN. What? (The prince stops.) Please kneel down.

QUEEN. Get on your knees, Philip. It must be done, my son. So they demand decency.

KING. Faster! You can't stand alone when we're all on our knees.

The prince falls to his knees.

It is desirable to emphasize the following features of the play as clearly as possible:

1. All elements of the grotesque and humor, neutralizing the painful situation underlying the play, without losing, however, the psychological realism and naturalness of the characters and the whole action.

2. Ease and freedom of text. The play should not be taken too seriously.

3. Full awareness of the actions of the characters. The most bizarre scenes should be played realistically. The heroes of the play are absolutely normal people who just found themselves in an abnormal situation. Their surprise, uncertainty, sense of shame in the face of these situations should be emphasized in accordance with the text. Costumes - modern, in extreme cases - with some fantasy elements (for example, a king in a jacket and with a crown, etc.). Scenery - better naturalistic. In the last act, complex lighting effects are needed. last scenes(banquet) can have the character of a dream, unreality - after which awakening occurs.

1 How ugly! (French).

2 Only in name, nominally (lat.)

3 Yvonne, don't you eat, dear? (French)

The play " Yvonne, Princess of Burgundy" was written by the classic of the Polish avant-garde Witold Gobrowicz in 1938, when the horror of fascism was already hanging over Europe and only a year before the start of the Second World War. Although there are no direct allusions to what is happening in the world in the text, the play gives as much room for interpretation as you like. Until the 50s of the twentieth century, Gombrowicz's work was banned, but in 1958 the Polish public, and then the whole world, saw the first production " Yvonne, Princess of Burgundy".

The play, dressed as a fairy tale, tells about the life of the royal family in a certain kingdom, a certain state where the royal army lives, and Crown Prince Philip meets a nondescript, sickly girl, Princess Yvonne, who behaves strangely, almost does not talk to anyone, on a walk, and to the surprise of many, he calls her his betrothed. After the appearance of Yvonne in the royal house, the life of the family is turned upside down: each character sees his own wretchedness, old complexes play with new colors, skeletons crawl out of the cabinets. The sickly girl is accused of all the sins and vices to which all the heroes of Gombrowicz's play are subject. Soon Yvonne bothers the prince and the whole royal court figure out how to get rid of the annoying princess. The chamberlain offers the most sophisticated way of killing - to feed Yvonne with crucian carp at a dinner party, and even more so, if all the guests look at her, she will definitely choke and die.

At the end of January 2011, on the stage of the Vakhtangov Theater, the premiere of the play "Princess Yvonne" directed by Vladimir Mirzoev took place.

I would like to make a reservation right away: Mirzoev did not even think of telling us about the horrors of the fascist regime through Gombrowicz's play. But still, notes of totalitarianism slip in a couple of master's marches theater music Faustes Latenas, and can be seen in the costumes and set design of Alla Kozhevnikova - an ascetic space converging in a rigid perspective from two walls in the first act, and in the second, cut off by a rough wall, with a movable podium in the middle of the stage; Prince Philip, two meters blond with Aryan bangs, in a gray coat, riding breeches and boots.

The performance begins with a Chinese exercise, which is repeated by all the characters admiring the sunset through a wall of tiled glass. Further, the entire royal court passes each other loaves of black bread to help the beggar (Oleg Lopukhov), throwing them somewhere outside the palace. At this point, Mirzoev's vague metaphors end, otherwise the director is quite straightforward.

Then the performance falls apart - the scenography, separately, the actors separately, and the music is not the topic. Efim Shifrin, in the role of King Ignacy, is trying in every possible way to get rid of his real king - the stage, but he does not succeed at all. Queen Margarita - Marina Esipenko in the first act appears before us as a strict lady, and already in the second she implausibly portrays a crazy housewife who does not like her own poems.

The spoiled, selfish, energetic prince, who runs around the stage throughout the performance, sometimes, however, drives off on the podium deep into the stage, is played by Dmitry Solomykin. During a walk, he and his two friends Kirill (Artur Ivanov) and Kiprian (Vasily Simonov) discuss who is better - blondes or brunettes? At this moment, Princess Yvonne appears, in the retinue of her aunts (Eleonora Shashkova and Agnes Peterson), barely moving, twisted, silent, moving her fingers cutely, with her eyes to her nose, you look at her and think, in this unfortunate girl, it seems all the diseases, which are only possible, and aunts lament all the time - “Why don’t you run skiing? Why don't you take up pole vaulting? Other ladies are jumping”(Really, why.) At the moments of her appearance, throughout the performance, Princess Yvonne is in the middle of the stage, and all the other characters around her, sometimes even dance or run around the princess. Mirzoev gave this role to Liza Arzamasova, she brilliantly coped with the game of a sick, silent girl (by the way, in a different cast, this role is played by Maria Berdinskikh, an actress of the Vakhtangov Theater, but in comparison with Arzamasa, Berdinskikh in this performance resembles a peppy shrimp in the thickets of arugula). Seeing her, the young prince is either joking, or seriously interested in Yvonne, immediately offers her a hand and a heart. Soon the princess gets bored and Prince Philip begins to torment her - he shows her an ax and a saw, puts a doctor's phonendoscope on her and even hangs her by a cable, while talking about how he raped and killed his next mistress, and at that time a shadow from a lattice falls on the wall fence, suggestive of a cage, that Yvonne hit. But in the end, only he alone decided to love Yvonne, unlike everyone else. In this mise-en-scene, about the decision to fall in love with the blessed, Philip takes Yvonne in his arms, in a half-smile she looks at him with love, and, at the moment of the prince's enlightenment, a pillar of light falls on them, resembling divine light. It is not for nothing that in the second act the princess has a ball of red threads - she, blessed, is given to the royal retinue to set the right path, to cleanse herself. And I even want to believe in his bright intentions, but according to the script that lies in front of the audience from the very beginning of the performance, everything is completely different. Then, after his decision, he will cheat on her with the court lady Isa (Ana Antonova) and change his mind. Almost the entire second act, which takes place on a moving podium, consists of long discussions, reasoning, funny monologues and dreary dialogues about how to poison Yvonne after all. Queen Margo holds a vial of poison in her hand, reciting something, reveals her secrets, quite funny, but still somehow in a collective farm way and is immediately lost when Iza enters, who accidentally overheard her. After long trials, between the “blind and deaf” King Ignatius and the Chamberlain (Yuri Shlykov), why do carps, and not crucian carp, decide that there should be crucian carp. In the finale, at a dinner party, choking on an unfortunate fish, Yvonne, completely tortured, goes out like a burnt candle. Following, next to her, Prince Philip lies down and, it seems, also gives up his breath (here it should be noted that Mirzoev follows the play word for word throughout the entire performance, but Gombrowicz's prince still remains alive). In this final scene, the most enchanting, the rough wall moves away, in its place appears the rose of a conditional Gothic cathedral, the two of them, lying on the podium, go deep into the stage. The rest of the heroes follow them, surrounding the podium, uttering the final phrase: "She remained all in each of us."

At first glance, it may seem that the performance is about one old truth - white crow in any case, black pecks. But Mirzoev would not be Mirzoev if it were so. This production is more about power, which is also at times (although it already seems that this is its main task) drives off. And then amazing events begin to happen: the abolition of several time zones and the transition to winter time, so as not to injure the psyche of milkmaids, cows and other animals; indistinct reform of education and the abolition of academies, and then professions; opening of new opera and ballet theaters in the regions (read the most expensive theater projects), but at the same time, most of the actors barely make ends meet, and local theaters are in a deplorable state, such that the audience is sitting on rotten chairs; new infamous judicial miracle cases against Khodorkovsky; betrayal of the intelligentsia with anyone, without fully understanding with whom, either with the Nazis, or with football fans, forgetting the names of old acquaintances invited "for tea" by Shevchuk and on, on, on. In general, the behavior of the authorities towards society is the same as that of Gombrowicz's heroes towards Princess Yvonne. In the bottom line, the royal family still cannot figure out what this slut is and, as an unnecessary element of their life, poisons. But Mirzoev correctly noted in his production that the authorities cannot exist without society, whatever it may be, therefore, in the finale, Prince Philip dies immediately after Yvonne.

The director himself says in an interview with a RIA Novosti correspondent - “Princess Yvonne” is a philosophical tale, a parable that today reveals its meanings and coincides with the problems and feelings of the modern world.” Only now this hint looks far-fetched on the stage today. Perhaps Mirzoev's mistake was that he sees a connection in the styles of Witold Gombrovich and Yevgeny Schwartz and got too carried away by this idea. As a result, they appeared on the scene fairy tale characters, and each actor began to play as he understands his hero. It should have been, in my opinion, so - the royal family is on the same wavelength, and Yvonne is on her own, otherwise it turns out to be a stylistic mistake between the director's thought and the performance.

In spirit, this performance is reminiscent of the recent premiere at the MTYUZ - “Notes of a Madman” by Kama Ginkas based on the text of the same name by Gogol. In the yellow house built by Sergei Barkhin, there lives a man - Poprishchin, perfectly played by Alexei Devotchenko. In the house, strange sounds are heard from nowhere, hallucinations in the form of two silent ballerinas peek into Poprishchin. At first, it seems that Ginkas conceived this performance in the sense that every self-respecting director should put on Diary of a Madman. But as the action develops, it becomes clear that this is not so. Poprishchin, being in his quiet madness, in one mise-en-scene, glues on the wall portraits of newsmakers known to everyone here and now: Pugachev, Galkin, Medvedev and a portrait of Ginkas himself, but this seems to be for a joke. Here it becomes clear that Poprishchin just wants to be among the regulars of gossip columns and news feeds. It is they who inflame his consciousness. Looking at himself from the outside, he suddenly decides to become the Spanish king, puts on a mantle sewn from newspapers. Ginkas hints that it is worth reading the headlines of newspapers and news reports - there are also notes of madmen. More specifically, crazy people.

The performance "Notes of a Madman" is about the "big crazy world" that destroys a person. As proof of this, the last mise-en-scène - Poprishchin climbs into a niche carved into the wall of a yellow house, similar to a coffin, and the final point starts cutting videos from gossip columns and faces of some politicians to the entire height and width of the stage.

The population of the parterre after the intermission is renewed by more than half - the "dear" audience begins to run away long before the break, but during the intermission "from the mountains" students descend and as a result the hall remains completely filled, and there is someone to clap on the bows, despite the fact that as before In the case of Nyakroshus, Ostermeier, Lepage, not to mention Wilson, Yazhina's premiere at the Theater of Nations is simply impossible to compare with those of his things that were brought to Moscow from Poland. Yazhina showed an excellent performance, and then all the more amazing because the original source is outdated and raises many questions, modern theatrical version Pier Paolo Pasolini.

Yvonne, Princess of Burgundy, like Jan Kljata's Macbeth at the Moscow Art Theatre, like another Macbeth by Krzysztof Garbachevsky from Alexandrinka, is a third-rate European theater for export. In the case of Yazhina, unlike Klyata, it is also, we must admit with regret, unbearably dreary, sometimes deadly boring. At the same time, and this is more important for me than the boringness of the spectacle, the heaviness of the action, it is Yvonne by Yazhina, perhaps - if not the most successful, then at least the most meaningful of the six (!!!) productions of Gombrowicz's first play, which I happened to see on Moscow venues over the past ten years: Safonov (in the TsIM), Urnov (by the way, in the Theater of Nations too, but before the arrival of Mironov), Levinsky (in the Hermitage), Lavrenchuk (in the Polish Theater in Moscow) and Mirzoev (in theater named after E. Vakhtangov). I take only those that I watched myself, because there are even more of them (for example, in the shopping center " The Cherry Orchard”has its own“ Yvonne ”, called“ Carp in sour cream ”- I haven’t seen it and I’m unlikely to ever get there).

Yazhina perceives Gombrowicz's early, almost "puppet" play not as a flat anti-totalitarian pamphlet, but does not turn it into a primitive parable about holiness and sacrifice. In general, his performance of all the alternative, so far performed Moscow versions of Yvonne ... reveals similarities only with a semi-amateur, but in its own way amusing (and not boring, unlike others) in the so-called. "Polish Theater in Moscow" - where performers of varying degrees of professionalism played Gombrowicz in Polish, which is not native for most Muscovite studios, in a format close to performance, in the spirit of futuristic dystopia and ... without Yvonne, or rather, with a rubber doll replacing her, an inflatable woman , but .. with Igor Nevedrov in the role of King Ignacy, where I saw Nevedrov for the first time.

At Yazhina, the scenes of the play are interrupted by English-language remarks recorded on a phonogram and translated through monitors (co-author of the stage version - Szczepan Orlowski, voice of the narrator - Emma Dallow), where Salvador Allende and Julian Assange are mentioned, the title of the film "Minority Report" arises in connection with the idea “crime prevention,” some fantastical story about an attempt to control the economy with a computer in Chile in the early 1970s and the penetration of self-censorship into the Internet caused by the voluntary desire of social network users to share the opinion of the majority is voiced - frankly, this speculative nonsense is not that optional, but also on duty, banal (especially in its ritual anti-American message - I wonder where Yazhina would be today without the United States? Would he put pioneer matinees on Lenin's anniversary in the house of culture? Or would he drink himself under a bridge in Paris? In any case, the use of such techniques in Russian, Moscow production today is not only vulgarity, but also foul language), it does not add anything to the performance in terms of content, but, by the way, it performs its rhythmic function as a structural element of the composition, and distracts attention while the installers rearrange the “decorations” consisting of abstract hollow cubes and trapeziums, a giant cut of a "metal" pipe, placed in a gray enclosure, the inner surface of which also serves as a screen for computer installations. On the other hand, the first picture, where Philippe and his friends meet Yvonne for the first time and further, when the prince introduces the shabby little girl to the crowned parents, is solved, despite the grotesqueness of the external image of the characters (costumes, the queen's hairstyle, the plastic mask on the Chamberlain's face) quite traditionally, stylishly but predictable. And from the second picture, in addition to the mentioned English remarks (with quotes provoking a variety of associations, like the Chinese proverb “kill the chicken to scare the monkey”), a real, albeit quite moderate in terms of the degree of radicalism, “cyberpunk” begins.

Well, yes, the technical details are, of course, important side project, but still, unlike most of the previous Moscow "Yvonne ...", the current one gives some reason to talk about the play and performance in essence. The heroine of Daria Ursulyak, and this is perhaps the most important point, is not ugly or messy, which is easy to imagine from the description and the inertia of the perception of the play through the previous director's interpretations. Yvonne here is an autistic androgyne in what looks like overalls, in boots, with a short “typhoid” haircut; she, of course, is not a beauty in relation to the "glamorous" secular maidens of the "court", but it is difficult to take her for a fearful person, for a homeless person, but for a sick person, which he insisted on in his version, and in two casts offering clearly different diagnoses to choose from , even more so. For the royal family, for the prince, for his entourage, for the father-king and mother-queen, Yvonne, who has strayed to the court by Philip's whim, is the object of manipulation, and in this case not only moral abuse, but also quite specific physical violence. However, very soon the manipulators themselves become dependent on her, thanks to the presence of Yvonne they cease to control themselves, their old sins emerge into the light of day ... - all this, in general, according to the play, according to the plot, but so far this "changeling ' was not so clear. Having placed a kind of socio-psychological experience over Yvonne, the unfortunate experimenters themselves become its victim, turn into guinea pigs, lose control over what is happening and over themselves, do not stand the test.

Maybe not too original, but the characters of the play are curiously presented in the performance, and the actors work at the limit of selflessness. First of all, the performers of the main roles: Daria Ursulyak's Yvonne is at the same time simple in her defenselessness, and mysterious, incomprehensible; Mikhail Troinik, who usually plays the role of brutally boorish, Prince Philip turned out to be unexpectedly refined, in a sense vulnerable (sometimes the actor simply cannot be recognized). The tall and skinny Chamberlain in a long-sleeved robe and with a plastic mask is the sinister character of Sergei Epishev. Whereas Philip's friends are figures of a rather comical nature, especially Kiprian-His Kovalev, and to a lesser extent Kirill-Kirill Byrkin (their kiss with Philip-Troynik in the end of the first act finally finishes off the parterre spectator, so after the break in their places it turns out to be completely different audience, but that's for the best). Coping with the task, portraying the likeness of a "cyborg", Igor Sharoiko-Valentin, mechanistically wandering from corner to corner of the site. It is more difficult than the rest for older actors, no matter how hard Agrippina Steklova and Alexander Feklistov try, but talent, skill and well-known looseness still do not allow them to fully comply with the rules of the game proposed by the director, where internal impassivity and calmness are necessary with the external grotesque of the picture - Steklov then and the case breaks through an open emotion, which, in my opinion, is inappropriate here.