What to do if the past makes you angry. Psychology: Anger is a dangerous feeling. Expressions of anger all over the face

16.11.2018

Just because a person isn't yelling at you, throwing fists at you, or throwing dishes on the floor doesn't mean they aren't angry. It is possible that he is holding back his emotions, but the accumulated anger is even worse than the expressed! So it’s not at all superfluous to find out what are examples of anger, which may indicate that a person in his soul is very angry with you.

We can distinguish broad strokes between the type of anger that persists over time, which appears as a response to a negative past event that has not yet been resolved, and another passenger, punctual, caused by a well-defined conflict and what is happening in the present. In the first case, it is known that those who suffered sexually or psychologically in childhood and did not have the opportunity to confront their aggressors usually have temper tantrums throughout their lives.

Here comes the frustration again given what the victim experiences severe pain regarding the injustice he has experienced and the fact that he cannot change him and it becomes an accumulation of violence that he can never unleash against the person or persons responsible for his pain, for which the explosion will almost cycle from year to year in year. This does not mean that this accumulated anger cannot be prosecuted and channeled in a way that is not harmful to the subject.

Examples of Anger: Learn How Anger Manifests

Consider what are examples of human anger. If your interlocutor has his arms crossed very high, almost on his chest, it means that he is in a state of sharp denial of the problem under discussion and is hostile.

This posture may remind you of a child or teenager asserting their independence in an argument with their parents. At such a moment, the quality of the voice usually changes dramatically. The person begins to speak more aggressively, and the content of his speech clearly indicates an increase in anger.

For Catholicism, anger is one of the seven capitals. This anger can manifest itself against oneself or against others. In both cases, it is punished by religious injunctions. In this case, various instruments are used to express it, such as an increase in speed and speed, as well as passages filled with ornaments and jumps that suffer from the sharp and harsh limits of each instrument by violent and in unexpected ways. Some experts argue that anger may arise due to a genetic or biological predisposition.

In a state of anger or hostility, another signal of body language appears - a person clenches one or both fists of crossed arms. If you see that the interlocutor is literally hugging himself, do not think that he has become cold, this a prime example man's anger.

And, finally, some hand gestures indicate the growth of anger and the fact that the interlocutor is trying to establish control over the situation. The easiest way to recognize anger is by tapping your fingers.

It is known that fatigue, hormonal changes, sexual problems, hunger or influence on reactions that show anger. It should be noted that, in a sense, anger can transcend human emotions. Thus, nature can "express" anger through violent phenomena: "The wrath of nature caused waves of more than 10 meters that devastated entire cities."

Showing anger with other emotions

Anger is a basic and universal emotion. Basic because it is at the service of our survival based on three functions; promoting the rapid development of defensive-attacking behavior, revitalizing our behavior and regulating social interaction. Universal because any member of a healthy species experiences anger. Therefore, being angry is not only normal, but necessary. However, when anger is too frequent or disproportionate in our lives, problems arise. Therefore, in addition to experiencing it, we must learn to control anger and know how to express it.

You have probably noticed that a person, impatiently waiting for the waiter to return to his table, who must take the order, begins to drum his fingers on the table. The angry boss clenches her fist and symbolically (or even really) hits the table with it. This clear example man's anger and a sign of aggression.

Someone hits the palm of the other hand or the arm of a chair with their fist. Sometimes people tap on some surface not with a fist, but with an open palm. Such gestures appear not only at those moments when people are angry at emotional level, but also when it seems to them that events are developing in an undesirable way for them, that they lose control over what is happening.

Emotions are closely related to our thoughts, so the situation can "live" in different ways, depending on the person. Therefore, instead of referring to "objective" situations that trigger emotions of anger, the right thing- relate to the thoughts associated with this situation that cause anger. Anger is an emotion that occurs when we are exposed to situations that are frustrating or unpleasant because we feel attacked. Therefore, there are two main categories of situations that trigger this emotion.

Obstructing access to a goal: When the achievement of our goals is interrupted, the cognitive evaluation that a person performs in relation to their behavior and the result of the same will determine the type of emotion that arises. When it is calculated that you can act on the factors blocking your access by restoring previous situations, anger appears. Violation of norms and rights: When social norms are exceeded, our rights are violated or treated unfairly, we feel anger. Disappearance of learned contingencies: When the reward we expect after performing a behavior does not appear, we get angry. Unpleasant experiences favor the emotion of anger, which makes it easier to express aggressive behavior.

Another example of a person's anger is the "pointing finger". I do not mean to say that simply pointing a finger at someone or something is a signal of anger. In anger, this gesture becomes sharp and even threatening. Noticing such behavior from the outside, it may seem to you that one of the interlocutors strikes the other with a dagger or sword.

The gesture can be directed at someone or something, or at oneself. The sharper this gesture, the more intense the anger experienced by the person. If your friend makes a similar gesture and points his finger down, then his anger has reached the limit. In some cases, such a gesture is a harbinger of real physical aggression.

A prime example of this is the experience of pain. So, for example, when something hurts us, our bad character flourishes. Knowing what upsets us will help us control our anger. The main characteristics that define borderline disorder are instability and impulsivity.

A frantic effort to avoid real or imagined rejection. They are very sensitive to environment. They have strong fears of abandonment and inappropriate anger at separation, even for a limited time or when inevitable changes in plans occur. These fears of being abandoned are linked to an intolerance of being alone and the need to be accompanied by other people. Their frantic attempts to avoid rejection may include impulsive actions such as suicide or suicide.

Examples of Anger: Verbal Signals of Anger

As we have said, anger prevents a person from listening carefully to the interlocutor. Since I am interested in resolving the conflict with the interlocutor, I need to understand what barriers separate us from solving the problem. I need to identify verbal evidence that the interlocutor is angry.

Unstable, intense and stormy interpersonal relationships, extremes of idealization and devaluation. They are prone to drastic changes in the opinion they have of others, alternating between what other people see as beneficial or cruelly punitive. Identity problems: unstable self-esteem or self-esteem. They represent sudden and exaggerated changes in self-esteem, which is manifested in a change in their goals, values ​​and professional aspirations. They are also prone to sudden changes in their opinions, plans for the future, sexual identity, scope of values, and the type of friendships they seek.

The most common examples of anger we think of are raising your voice, stern facial expressions, and aggressive nonverbal behavior. However, these are just the obvious symptoms. An angry person may react to a situation very coldly and calmly.

mental state anger becomes noticeable when the person begins to use diffuse, disguised remarks. For example, instead of talking about a specific issue that you raised, he may complain that you touched on this topic, or say that he does not want to talk about it now. This is a verbal example of anger.

They become obsessed with their appearance which can lead to the development of an eating disorder. Repetitive behavior, attempts or suicidal threats or self-injurious behavior. These actions are often precipitated by fears of separation or rejection, or by the expectation that they must take on more responsibility. The self-inflicted damage can be a relief because he "reconnects to reality" by reaffirming his ability to feel.

Anger Can Help Your Career

affective instability. Episodes of intense discomfort, irritability or anxiety, anger, anguish, despair, which usually last for several hours and rarely after several days. They suffer from extreme reactivity to interpersonal stress.

Of course, if you are talking about a complex, subtle topic in front of strangers or with limited time, then you may indeed have made a mistake. There is no need to discuss such a topic in such an environment. But if the interlocutor asks why you brought up this topic, instead of answering your question, it is quite possible that he is withholding important information from you.

Chronic feelings of emptiness. Described as a lack of a sensory or emotional vacuum that cannot be filled by anything, it can lead to some sort of physical pain or a kind of mental paralysis that immobilizes the subject for days.

These expressions of anger are often accompanied by grief and guilt and contribute to feeling bad. Transitional paranoid ideas. Associated with periods of extreme stress and lasts between minutes and hours. It is wrong that a person with a personal personality disorder.

Be constantly pretending and exaggerating, but nothing really happens. - Can achieve anything, but is too lazy or unmotivated. - Manipulate and deliberately manipulate other people to achieve their goals. - I can't reason or have problems with my intellect. - To be a lost case for which nothing can be done. - Be the one to play it safe and avoid any effort or dislike. - Be what you need, it's a hard hand. - Be a frivolous person and lack of feelings.

I often cooperate with the police. I have always been interested in a situation in which a person does not deny his unseemly act, but instead attacks the facts contained in his case. The interrogated did not refute the crimes they had committed, but answered: "You cannot prove it."

Remember when you yourself were told: “This is not proof,” “They have no proof,” “You can’t prove that I did it.” Suppose there is a product on the market that the consumer protection society has determined is dangerous to people.

Indicators in adolescence

Educational styles and parental attitudes, associated or unrelated psychopathological disorders. More high level sexual violence in childhood in patients diagnosed with borderline disorder.

  • Affective deficiencies and relational distortions in early childhood.
  • Serious family dysfunctions that affect family communication styles.
Over 400 riders gathered to pay their respects to "Grandpa Bob". Bob Shields, one of the founders of the once-fearful motorcycle gang called the Bandits, has died of cancer at the age of 78.

You can hear the manufacturer defending the product, claiming that the test data is unreliable, that the results were misinterpreted, and that the testing agency was bribed. Note that the company does not provide alternative evidence and even states: “Well, such a hype will only benefit us” or “We don’t have enough material.”

The meaning of the word "anger"

Middle-aged and older bikers gathered to drink beer and remember the stories of the old good times drug use, assault, terrorism and murder, not to mention some legal sins. What caught my attention was the "macho" in which they considered death and the reality of a future test.

Should negative emotions be suppressed?

"Grandpa, let's give them hell," said the grey-haired bearded biker. "Right now, the devil is on the side of the unemployed." It was reported that Lamont, another biker gang member and full of tattoos, said: Where has he gone, that's where we'll all go someday, He's just waiting for us.

Verbal examples of anger. A person in a state of anger tries to regain control over the situation. At the same time, he tries to avoid solving a truly important problem.

Another distraction tactic is used by a person who starts arguing about petty or trivial issues. This is also a prime example of anger. He may claim that his interlocutor incorrectly names the time or even the date of a particular event. Or incorrectly describes his behavior.

Most people don't like to think about God's wrath at all, preferring to mourn and talk about God's love. Those who truly believe that God is both a God of wrath and a God of love prefer to think of His wrath in time. Many seem to think that the wrath of God is the truth of the Old Testament, and that with the coming of Christ we are now set free and can only speak in terms of God's love. This is wrong thinking about God.

Pink makes the next remark. It's sad to find so many professing Christians who view God's wrath as something they have to apologize for or at least think anger doesn't exist. Although some do not go so far as to openly admit that they consider the Divine character a disgrace, they do not look upon it with delight; They do not like to think about it and seldom hear about it without a secret resentment rising from their hearts against him. Even with those who are more sober in their judgment, few believe that there is a seriousness towards an angry God that is too terrifying to consider as a matter of useful contemplation.

Or incorrectly names the number of repetitions of a certain action. Or is mistaken about the cost, volume, or value of something. In any conversation, you can find a lot of problems that are not related to the main topic, on which you can start a fierce argument and unleash a conflict.

Of course, an aggressive reaction can be very personal. This is a very destructive example of anger, which does not allow you to find mutual language and come to a compromise.

Others harbor the illusion that God's wrath is out of harmony with His goodness and therefore tries to make it disappear from their thoughts. Yes, there are many people who distance themselves from seeing the wrath of God because they think they have been called to look at a stain in God's character or some kind of error in God's government. But what does Scripture say? When we turn to them, we see that God did not try to hide his anger. He is not ashamed to say that revenge and anger belong to him.

Pink in his book. "A study of concordance will show us that there are more references in the Scriptures to the wrath, fury, and fury of God than to His love and tenderness." The wrath of God is one of His attributes, as a part of Him, as are many other attributes; an attribute without which God would be less than God.

Examples of Anger: Nonverbal Signals of Anger

Let's take a look at what non-verbal signals of anger are. There are two positions of the head showing that in emotional reaction interlocutor there is a certain hostility.

If the conversation touches on a controversial issue, you may notice that the other person tilts their head slightly. At the same time, he clearly sticks out his chin. This is an example of anger. Here is a person who shows aggression or feels a sense of hostility towards you or the topic under discussion.

This position of the head and chin can be seen before a real fight or a violent quarrel. Watch the players of the opposing teams during an intense football or hockey match.

When they communicate with each other on the playing field, you will certainly see such an aggressive head position in one or both of the participants in the skirmish. Well, then everything is clear - they tear off their gloves, throw aside their helmets and start hitting each other!

Non-verbal signals of anger. Two examples of anger and hostility:

1) the interlocutor tilts his head slightly, while sticking out his chin;

2) compressed jaws and nodules on the cheeks.

There is another example and sign of anger - the position of the head and chin, indicating that a person is experiencing feelings of anger or hostility. But in this case, he tries his best to keep aggression under control. To recognize such a reaction, pay attention to the back of the interlocutor's jaws - to that part of them that is located near the ears.

As aggression builds up, the person tries his best to control himself, and you will notice the play of the jaw muscles in this area. This is because the person clenched their jaws and sometimes even gritted their teeth. The nodules on the cheeks are a clear example of anger and a sign of barely contained hostility and attempts to control oneself.

If you notice that the interlocutor slightly covers his eyes, looks askance, and his eyebrows form the letter "V", then anger or hostility is growing in the person. You will also notice that your interlocutor has tense muscles around the eyes, in the corners of the eyes and the upper part of the cheeks.

As an example of anger, remember how you went to church with your parents as a child and could not cope with natural restlessness. You wanted to turn around, whisper, fidget, sigh loudly, poke your brother or sister in the side - in a word, it was very difficult to sit still.

Remember what look your father or mother gave you in such a situation. You know him very well. This look said that serious troubles awaited you at home. Almost the same expression appears on the face of an interlocutor who is in a state of stress or is about to deceive you.

This is an example of anger and a sign of an increase or presence of aggression in a person's emotional reaction. If you see that a person is smiling at you, but at the same time looking at you like a father in church, then the interlocutor is insincere in expressing his feelings.

Everyone knows how scary a person is in a state of anger, so what is anger and everything you wanted to know about anger, we will consider in this article. Anger is a short burst of aggression aimed at eliminating the source of his irritation. First of all, anger is emotional condition directed outward, and not a specific action.

This emotional state can push a person to various types actions, such as to punish the offender. Holding anger within themselves, people often turn it against themselves. Depending on the individual features Person and situation people experience anger in different ways.

Types of anger in examples:

1. Immediate anger.

Natalya, aged 29 (economist), complained that her husband was very hot-tempered. He expressed his anger in the form of curses and threats, she was afraid of his anger, fearing for her safety. To protect herself, she also began to scream, which only increased her husband's anger. Subsequently, Elena realized that such a state of her husband was quite safe if she did not actively resist him. She learned not to respond with anger to her husband's aggression, realizing that these were just emotions. As a result, the manifestation of anger in her husband became less frequent. The situation was finally resolved when both realized that anger is an emotional discharge.



Advice: there is no need to deny anger, but do not forget to bear responsibility for it and try not to experience an immense feeling of guilt, it will only increase anger.

2. Displaced anger.

Such anger manifests itself in the form of a shift of one's rage from the offending person to inanimate objects. Broken dishes, broken handles or mobile phone, which shattered into smithereens against the wall, this is what happened with Svetlana, 35 years old (manager). All because she was afraid of hurting another person. When Svetlana realized that a small material damage was the price for the calm state of her relatives and business partners. Over time, she was able to move from active to imaginary, which saved her from financial losses.

Advice: when meeting with a person who breaks dishes or breaks his mobile, remember that in this way he protects the environment from his own anger. If in Once again you broke something, analyze what this action symbolized and next time try to imagine the act of beating objects, for example, by drawing something.

3. Delayed anger.

Vasily, 40 years old (entrepreneur) fell victim to such anger. Having married, he later found out that the wife is angry not at the moment when the problem arose, but after when she is safe, for example, at home. She was afraid that because of her anger she would be punished. Subsequently, Alexander talked with his wife in a calm atmosphere and found out that she had conflicts with her superiors, and she simply played out on him, because, for fear of being fired, she restrained her emotions at work. The couple began to discuss and analyze the conflicts that occurred at work, which significantly reduced outbursts of anger and improved their family life.

Tip: When you feel angry, try to find out what caused it, what really pissed you off and prevented you from responding to it right away.



4. Revenge.

Valentina, aged 34 (accountant), was tormented by remorse from her vindictiveness. Her upbringing did not allow her to react violently to resentment, and she did not want to burden loved ones with her problems. Taking out anger on inanimate objects did not bring positive results. And the only way to find peace was revenge. However, when revenge was carried out, Valentina began to feel guilty. Later, she learned to imagine revenge without harming another person.

Advice: if you got burning desire to take revenge on someone, imagine it, basically mental reprisals free you from feelings of anger.



5. When anger turns on yourself.

When Ekaterina, 35 years old (an economist), was offended by someone, instead of fighting back, she turned her anger on herself, punishing and blaming herself for what had happened. At the same time, anger had no outlet and subsequently took the form of depression. Catherine felt much better when she allowed herself to show at least some of her anger outside.

Tip: learn to express a feeling of anger, often the absence of any reaction does not make it clear to other people what a person really feels and what he does not like.

6. Inhibition of anger.

Ekaterina, 50 years old (accountant), showed her anger in the form of self-isolation. Most destructive form. Faced with someone's aggression, she immediately stopped her communication, thinking that the anger that arose was absolutely calm and remained unconscious. Catherine simply slowed down her rage. Since the anger was not manifested and was not realized, it began to come out in the form of headaches and bodily ailments. Subsequently, Catherine learned to understand own feelings at the moment when the conflict occurred - this significantly reduced the pain in the head and back, and after finding a form to express their emotions outside, they almost disappeared.

Advice: know that the presence of anger is normal and should be expressed in moderation.

Anger: everything you wanted to know about anger we tried to consider, for example, what types are and how best to deal with them.



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