Can a traitor be a good person? Betrayal of people. Why do people betray each other? Why betray friends, girlfriends, loved ones? or How to live after you have been betrayed and you have lost faith in people and in love, have lost the strength to love

06.03.2019

Betrayal can be compared to a knife in the heart. And this is no exaggeration, because at this moment there is a feeling that life has ended. That all the best and kindest things are left in the past, and an unknown future looms ahead. Surviving betrayal means getting for yourself a very valuable and important lesson. A lesson that will hardly ever be forgotten...

Or How to live after you have been betrayed and you have lost faith in people and in love, have lost the strength to love

The best phrases and status for those who have ever been betrayed! Check out our quotes about betrayal and get inspired! If someone betrays you once, it is his fault. Take care of your relationship, don't live with reservations! Betrayal has no justification.

Who really loves because he never thought about betrayal, now who has already betrayed, it's because he never loved. Never trust anyone, especially people you admire. Some talk to you when they have time and some people take time to talk to you!

The betrayal of a person close to you completely changes your worldview. And it changes remarkably quickly. You have been betrayed. Your feelings were not needed by someone who was so dear to you. From what? And the most main question- Why? You can torment yourself with the search for an answer to this question for an infinitely long time, but you need to understand that only the one who betrayed you can give you the right answer. Everything else is your guesses and conjectures.

Do you know the door you want to open? The biggest apology is a change in behavior! You know when you're quitting that little addiction just because it doesn't make you feel good. This is where self-love begins! Arrogance makes you strong for one day.

Today's disappointments become learning, maturity and serenity tomorrow! The use of indirect phrases in the status is ideal for those who want to give a message of fake, a boy who was ungrateful and just wants to see you at your worst! Check out the best indirect status phrases here, get inspired!

In this regard, it is better for you to spare your nerves (they will still be useful to you) and not try to think about what guided the person close to you. He clearly had his own motives. But what do you...

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How to survive the betrayal of a loved one

After reading this article, you will know how to survive betrayal. loved one and stop thinking about it.
In our difficult life There are moments when the closest person betrays us. Such a person can be a best friend, a once-faithful soulmate, and close relatives. It is very difficult to come to terms with the fact that your trust has been broken on the sharp stones of betrayal and meanness. But life goes on, only memory can not let go of the one we trusted so much.
We must learn to forgive and let go, but this is such a subtle philosophy that you need to grow up to.

Falling in love lives in harmony with love 24 hours a day! Choose the most beautiful love phrases to show how you feel! Betrayal is the subject that causes the most different types reactions and a variety of opinions. However, with the development of customs, the topic must be revisited, since theories and ideas that until recently were considered indisputable truths today were much more flexible or definitely fell to the ground. Here are some examples.

But one thing is a fact: it is better to solve the crisis, and not try to run away from it. The desire to care and understand in someone else's arms, apparently, eliminates problems, but does not solve them. “Some of those who betray create another problem in addition to the ones they already have,” says psychotherapist Carmen Cerqueira Caesar. And many couples face crisis and grow through it.

An independent expert on sociological issues, Artem Sergeevich, again agreed to take part in the discussion of the issue and express his point of view related to how one can survive betrayal and what needs to be done in order not to lose trust in people.

Good afternoon,...

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How to survive the betrayal of a friend?

And many people refer to sexual relations or a love meeting with other people with naturalness, says psychotherapist Carmen Cerqueira Caesar. Many seek out extramarital affairs for a simple reason: desire for the other person, which is normal and does not mean a lack of love for the couple.

One of the main factors that justifies the statistics is that male betrayal still has more social acceptance. For therapist Ana Maria Fonseca Zompieri, the numbers are almost equal, but what makes a woman's betrayal so much less is that they fear macho culture's retribution. "A woman is more careful to hide betrayal," she says. In addition, research from the United States suggests that men are more likely to betray when they have stronger sexual urges.

Read also on the topic:

God forbid someone learn and survive the betrayal of a friend. This feeling is in no way comparable to other mental anguish. Even many divorced people quickly build new relationships and remarry, and a person who has survived the betrayal of a friend can no longer trust anyone and is suspicious of everyone. How to survive the betrayal of a friend?

But, depending on the case, trust can be restored. “It depends on a number of factors, the circumstances in which the infidelity occurred, the type of involvement, the moment of the couple,” an example is psychotherapist Carmen Cerqueira Caesar. “If there is love and the ability to understand what happened and why it happened, you can gain confidence,” says the expert.

According to couples psychotherapist Paulo Tessarioli, this requirement is not always related to sex. "It's not uncommon for one person to connect with another simply because they feel understood," he says. Although many women also think this way today, it is customary for a female to be more emotionally involved than a male. We cannot ignore this, despite behavioral evolution, we are still driven by some macho columns. “A man likes to separate love from sex more than what happens to a woman,” says family and couple therapist Ana Maria Fonseca Zampiri.

Faced with betrayal, you will probably begin to ask the following question: “Why did this happen to me?”. The answers may be completely different. Either you have a very poor understanding of the people around you, or you are completely gullible (but do not overdo it with self-criticism).

Assess the situation from a philosophical point of view. Perhaps fate sent you such tests to temper your spirit.

She says that most women who enter a relationship based on sex change their minds along the way. They try to convince themselves that it's just a fucking little thing, but they get involved. A woman must know what she represents for another, she must be loved.

The image of a lover, full of passion, whimsical. “What charms of extramarital relations are the interest in the conversation, the preparation for the meeting, good mood rather than criticism, among other things,” he says. According to family and couple therapist Ana Maria Fonseca Zampiri, it's rare for a person who supports a lover or lover to have a purely sexual relationship. Already someone will betray carelessly, yes.

Do not think about the bad things, that life is no longer nice, that all people are bad, etc. drive away such thoughts from yourself if they began to visit you. All our thoughts...

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or How to live after being betrayed
and you have lost faith in people and in love, you have lost the strength to love.

Have you been betrayed? You left the person who was dear to you, who was your friend, whom you loved, and you no longer feel the desire for love in yourself? Very good. Just great. (You will understand why this is good and wonderful when you read the article to the end). Someday this would definitely happen. Every person, there is no exception here, because this is not a rule, but a natural component of a full-fledged and human life, and its constructive harmonious development.

Men who are more sensitive. Of course, they prefer fidelity if they are happy and content with love and sexuality with their partner. They have good self-esteem, the security of their masculinity and do not feel the need to assert themselves by betraying, says psychotherapist Carmen Cerqueira Caesar. But remember: the person who seeks extramarital affairs is not always the opposite of what has been described. Being monogamous or not depends also on one's beliefs on the matter.

For psychotherapist Carmen Cerqueira Caesar, if this real love, new couple formed and stay together, yes. Sometimes for the rest of your life,” he says. It happens that some extramarital affairs are so long and narrow that they turn into a kind of second marriage. And, like any long-term relationship, it suffers from wear and tear.

Many people think that they are the only ones who are so unlucky. In vain they think so. It is generally inappropriate to talk about luck or bad luck here. And it's best to refer to it as a "viral disease of the soul." There are people who rarely get sick, but there are those who never get sick at all. The main thing to understand is that betrayal in love is normal.

Among those who confess their adultery, women will have more partners than men. According to a recent British study, women will have an average of 2.3 secret lover, compared to 1.8 mistresses for men. Why are we deceiving someone? Men trust the need for sexual arousal, ego renewal and avoid the boredom of their marriage. Women recognize their desire for romance, personal achievement, and self-worth.

The first betrayal occurred after five years of marriage among women, after six in men. Both sexes believe that a person is not monogamous. In her book Faithful, Faithless, Patricia Delahaye has collected many reviews about faithful women or not. Why this desire to go somewhere else? A philosopher and sociologist by training, the author of this review brings his own coverage.

Now about...

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We have to face the first betrayal in early childhood. Then, for lack of experience, we perceive everything more sharply and more painfully. But over the years, old grievances are forgotten and new ones come to replace them, sometimes from the most unexpected side.

Why do people betray?

This question is tormented by everyone who has ever experienced the betrayal of a friend or loved one. Meanwhile, the question itself contains a trap. Most often, betrayal occurs not due to some personal reasons or intentions, but under the influence of circumstances. Someone shows natural weakness, someone forgets about their obligations, and someone simply does not dare to confess in time. One way or another, try to understand that this is not your fault. Many people are naturally weak and tend to do stupid things, acting completely unconsciously. Often betrayal can be completely imaginary, because you perceive your relationship differently. Before you dramatize, try to find out what is on ...

Is today's infidelity the same as yesterday? Nowadays, women are often financially independent, and they are no longer at risk of punishment for infidelity. They want to please in order to accept their desires and pleasure. But above all, infidelity was once considered a sin, whereas today it is a personal fulfillment.

Can we still talk about lack? Legally no, divorce divorce no longer exists. Guilt, it always exists and is more important for women than for men. Is female infidelity less acceptable? When the company has two married man go out together, especially for a woman who is badly looked at. And then the education of little girls is more focused on changing their bodies than on their pleasure.

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Instruction

When faced with betrayal, you are probably wondering: “Why did this happen to me?”. Answer options may vary. Either you are not good with people, or you are overly gullible (but do not overdo it with self-flagellation).
Try to assess the situation from a philosophical point of view. Perhaps fate sends you trials to temper your spirit.

According to you, where does infidelity begin? To be unfaithful is to sleep with someone else. Fantasy, no matter what she thinks about it, is not infidelity. Will people build small arrangements? Often in these cases we play with words because there is some morality of fidelity that reigns. Therefore, we arrange with ourselves, which sometimes leads to special accounting.

Thus, the feeling of infidelity is sharpened when the marital bond becomes strong again, while it recedes if the couple is cold. When this dimension is missing from a couple, there is danger. A man who looks at you like a woman is irresistible. It is unbearable for a woman not to desire.

Any of your assumptions will do, except for the following: “All people are selfish egoists”, “I have no happiness in life - no family, no friends, no career”, “Nothing, I will be more careful in the future! From now on, no friends! If you are visited by any of these thoughts, nip them in the bud. Transformed into subconscious attitudes, they will not allow you to get out of depression.

What happens in the origin of infidelity? Infidelity often reveals either a marital crisis or an existential crisis. In the first case, adultery is a kind of transition from one spouse to another, a change of love. In the second, infidelity reveals only desire elsewhere, not rejection of the spouse.

Is there a paradox between the ideal of fidelity couples and a strong prescription for personal fulfillment? Yes it's true. In the name of self-realization, one feels empowered to betray the established pact of loyalty. It is a self at the expense of us, as if there is a "true me". It seems to me that this is a lure, because we are social animals, mating, which we also build in limitation. We increase the sexual act too much, as if it were very light, without incident. Actually, it's not so trivial because we need love.

Having survived the betrayal of a friend, you are in a state of shock. This is due to the fact that strong friendship behind long years has become one of the foundations of your worldview. And when the load-bearing wall collapses, the whole building begins to stagger.

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How to forgive the betrayal of a loved one

When loved ones betray us, pain, disappointment and emptiness settle in the soul. These feelings break the heart so much that sometimes a person does not see the further meaning of life. But any, even the most a difficult situation, requires an informed decision.

Often, betrayal forever destroys the idyll in a relationship. But more often people try to restore lost trust, and start life with clean slate. How to forgive the betrayal of a loved one, and learn to trust him again?

Who are the women who take the plunge? They believe that love and sexual encounter should be brought to an end. They assume it completely. There is often a constant person in their life and two or three important meetings. They do not want to deprive themselves, on behalf of the couple, of enriching meetings and never promised to be faithful.

And then there are women who will crack, succumbing to irresistible attraction. Why do so many people live in fear? It's a subtle yet palpable atmosphere, an atmosphere that disturbs almost everyone, even if it's hard to define. What creates this atmosphere? Why are some people afraid when they leave home? Why do so many people feel insecure at work? Why do many parents fear for the safety of their children? What are the threats that terrorize people in their own houses?

Is it worth it to forgive?

Often the word "betrayal" refers to physical treason. And before accepting important decision you must decide whether the traitor is worthy of forgiveness. To do this, you must find out the reason for his act. If you find out that your partner has been cheating on you for a long time, and he has a second family, it is unlikely that your forgiveness will be able to revive the old relationship. Such an act carries too severe consequences for all participants in the current ...

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In fact, there are many reasons for fear, but we will focus on four dangers that have special meaning for the constant anxiety of their victims: urban violence, sexual harassment, rape and domestic violence. Let's start with urban violence. This is a topic that is more relevant than ever, with almost half of the world's population concentrated in cities.

Initially, cities were probably a security issue, but today they are more of a danger zone. What was once a refuge is now cut off. The hustle and bustle of urban centers is the perfect environment for offenders, and it's risky to venture into some poor, poorly lit, and poorly guarded areas.

The answer to the question of how to survive betrayal lies in the question itself - SURVIVE! Just live, finding an interest in life that is not related to the person who betrayed you.

Who can betray?

Betrayal can be perceived as such only from a loved one - a loved one, a husband. We do not evaluate the betrayal of a friend or girlfriend as the "end of the world": betrayed? Well, the flag is in his (her) hands! "The warehouse will give you a new one!" But the betrayal of a loved one, a beloved man or a lawful husband, we perceive very hard, even tragically, almost like the destruction of the entire Universe.

Why is this happening? Because as a result of the betrayal of a loved one, our trust in him is trampled, which was the guarantee that a woman is not alone, she has a reliable rear behind her - a person whom she can rely on and trust him. Awareness of the fact of betrayal leads to the fact that a woman instantly feels lonely and unappreciated. Peace in her...

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And why are you with him, if you have not forgiven? Yes, I would be glad, but where can I go with a small child? My parents live in a dacha, and the apartment is rented out to tenants, and they live at their expense. I don’t want a new relationship, I’m not drawn to it, and as mentioned above, now I won’t be able to trust another initially. I’m still on maternity leave, without work (((And like any woman, in 15 years there is some hope that everything will get better, with everything is really getting better on his part, but now I can’t overcome myself.Moments when you don’t think about what happened, everything is fine, but when even a minor quarrel occurs, I began to perceive everything very painfully, I often suspect if everything had started again ........ oh, this is a nightmare in short. I feel that sometimes the roof goes because my head says that there will be nothing good in this relationship, and my heart asks me to wait and hope that time is all .. .

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Betrayal is a blow you don't expect. Paulo Coelho

Have you ever been betrayed, dear readers? I'm sure they betrayed. That's why you showed interest in this article, isn't it? And now you want to know how you can continue to live with the pain in your soul that you experience and that haunts you. However, it is quite possible that you yourself betrayed someone, and because of this, you now have a heavy burden on your soul that you want to get rid of. You want to know what it is like to be betrayed, you want to understand how the person who has been betrayed feels, how much his pain is. And you will definitely find out about this, because in this article I am going to tell you everything I know about betrayal. And I know a lot about him, believe me. Betrayal is something that I have repeatedly encountered in my life, not only as a specialist, but also as a person who was cruelly betrayed several times. Therefore, I will share with you not only my knowledge of betrayal, but also my feelings. Unfortunately,...

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In almost all world religions, betrayal was considered and is considered one of the worst sins: Judas betrayed Christ and forever remained the embodiment of apostasy. Almost in any legislation, treason is considered one of the most serious crimes against the state.

The moral category, and betrayal is one of those, turns out to be very important both for huge states and for individual person- all appreciate devotion and despise treason. But if the best lawyers of the world and international and national courts deal with betrayal at the state level, then betrayal in the family or simply in human relations really remains simply on the conscience (or on the conscience) of the one who decided on it. Why can a person become a traitor, an apostate, an informer, a spy, that is, simply a traitor?

Circumstances are very different - this is jealousy, and envy, and fear, it can be fanaticism or greed, the inability to keep one's tongue for ...

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Wadded legs, the heart is pounding madly about chest and the stomach seems to do somersaults, causing nausea. Anger, shock, pain, disappointment from lost trust. What can cause such emotions? Betrayal. No matter what happened - adultery, abuse, lies, lack of support, a broken promise, secrets revealed or something else. Being betrayed hurts a lot. A few tips to help you deal with this stress.

Acknowledge your feelings

Don't ignore own emotions. Feeling what you feel is normal. Write about them in your diary. If you realize that emotions are overwhelming in such a way that they interfere with living a normal life, contact a psychologist.

Take care of yourself

Eat healthy food, drink plenty of water, exercise, preferably on fresh air. Get enough sleep. Do something that gives you pleasure. Whatever happens to you, don't make your body suffer. In the end,...

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It is difficult for many people to survive betrayal, especially if a loved one inflicted a knife in the back. If you've ever experienced a betrayal by a friend, you know how difficult it can be to deal with at times. After all, a person loses confidence in his surroundings. Some in these situations try to drown out the pain with the help of alcoholic beverages, and in the future, in addition to longing, they also have to treat alcoholism. But the most dangerous thing that a betrayal of a friend can lead to is a person’s unwillingness to communicate with other people, his attempt to close himself off from the outside world.

What to do if you have been betrayed

If a friend betrayed you for the first time, then you should figure out why this could happen. In some cases, the reason lies in the inability of a person to choose his environment or in excessive credulity. But do not blame yourself for everything, because in any situation two people are to blame.

If you do not know how to relieve stress after the betrayal of a loved one, try to analyze everything ...

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How to survive the betrayal of her husband: advice from a psychologist

You found out that your husband is not faithful to you, and consider this a betrayal. You do not know how to continue to live and yearn for revenge. But what if you perceive everything too clearly? What if this is not a betrayal of her husband at all, but an unfortunate mistake, or vice versa, main love his whole life? Let's expand the vision of this problem and use the wise advice of psychologists.

How to survive the betrayal of her husband: forgive or expel?

How to survive the betrayal of a husband / man and believe in love again? Is it worth it to forgive a person in this case? How to learn to trust people again? We will try to answer these and other questions.

Is it even worth it to forgive the person who betrayed you? Undoubtedly yes! The anger that remains in the soul eats us from the inside. That is why it is very important to let go of resentment, because in this way we cause irreparable harm to ourselves. As for the question of whether to continue...

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You've been friends since childhood or since attending school or university. At that time, there is no betrayal, because there are no problems. Always together, went everywhere with each other, shared the most secret secrets Helped out when it was really needed. Is this true friendship? It's hard to answer. And it’s difficult because on a beautiful day you are betrayed. It doesn't have to be one person, it can be friends. There are many articles on the Internet - “a cry from the heart: My friends betrayed me, why are they wiping their feet on me?” So much betrayal around.

One of the stories. Yana

“We have been friends since childhood, a story from the time of school, now I am graduating from university. At one point, a lot of problems fell on me, difficulties in relation to me; I seriously quarreled with my mother, and unable to bear everything, I went for a few days to my grandmother. I asked my friend not to disturb me, because I did not want to communicate with anyone. To which I only received one negative. A friend called me selfish, that she was worried, and I only think about myself. I understand that I’m wrong, but I have so many problems, my head is spinning, I don’t want to see anyone. I asked for forgiveness for my actions.

Because of this, our relationship became strained, it was hard to be with each other, and she had a new girlfriend. It's a shame, of course, but we agreed to remain friends, not to be enemies. WITH new girlfriend they talked everywhere, went to various events together. But when she has problems, she comes to me and shares them with me. She says she can't open up as a new one yet. And I listen, support her, give advice. I am always ready to help.

But as soon as we are in public together, she makes me look like a fool, always makes me wrong in disputes in which she does not even participate. And she is too lazy to sit at the same desk with me.

Why do I endure all this humiliation and betrayal best friend? Why do I allow you to wipe your feet on me? I myself understand that I should not allow this, but I have always been strong, but, not understanding anything, I try to establish contact again, turn the other cheek. I was disappointed in female friendship, but I want everything to be the same as before, when we were faithful friends.

Pain in the soul

It's a shame to realize that I'm only needed when someone needs help in advice or simple support. Yes, I'm glad to help, listen - with joy, as a mother, I understand and will not offend. But this is where the relationship ends, they neglect the fact that it is important to me, that I also need the support and reliable shoulder of a friend. For some reason, they don’t discuss their problems with anyone, they just “hang out” with others, have fun, and they run to me with problems. Not only does this apply to one of my girlfriends, everyone around me does this. I am like a transit point, as a place where people need to repent, get support, they show their weakness with me, I accept it, and help. Never laughed in your face and said that they were wrong. But in public they do not seem to notice me, they almost try to avoid my company, they behave aloofly.

It’s not self-confident to say, I’m no different from others either externally or in communication, no worse, it’s interesting with me. But they wipe their feet on me. Feet are wiped by those whom I consider friends. How to find a good and true friend? Or will I have to live like this for the rest of my life?

I have an important event, I hope for support, but they throw me into last moment, citing stupid reasons. Of course, I put on an understanding face, I tell them "yes, of course, it's okay." And then I feel sad, and even worse, I roar. It's a shame, not children now, to blindly believe lies.

Sometimes I look into their eyes, it seems to me that I even see a sense of guilt on their faces, honestly, I saw it, apparently they understand that they are not treating me fairly, but, unfortunately, they stop there. If only someone apologized ... You feel like a doormat - you wiped your feet - we ask for joy!

I watch films, they show true friendship, and I think, well, it must be, because how is it. And I'm waiting for the appearance of a person with whom it will be possible to just sit next to me, say nothing, but be there and feel support. I firmly decided that someday I will have a child, and I will give him all my love, he will grow in joy, he will become a good and decent person, and I will always help him, because I don’t want him to know grief and betrayal by others.

What is friendship based on? Why am I alone? Does everyone have it? Is everyone talking and waiting at the same time for a hit from your friend? Or someone lucky enough to have faithful loved ones? This is my soul cry! Maybe someone will feel better from my words, someone is also in a situation like me. After all, it must be so, there must be people in different parts of the world who are honest and kind, who value friendship.”

My opinion

Why best friends betray

Yana, fuck such friends!!! There are enough people like your "friends" in our world, selfish and ... Everyone will choose the words for himself. You are a good person, you have no flaws, and I often found myself in such a situation. It's disgustingly awful! You pick your friend, and he's really a rotten dummy. Good friend he will never make fun of you or avoid you in public, he has a conscience. And he will definitely help you. And the "rotten" - they punish themselves, refusing friendship with such wonderful person, How are you. It's just that our world is becoming cruel, everyone is afraid to show their weaknesses, and hide behind a mask strong man and if there are people on the way kind soul like you, they express everything that they have accumulated bad. You're right, for them, you're a staging post.

They are not worthy to be called your friends, let them now cope with their own problems. I really hope you get it soon true friend. And you know, choose not from the "stars" - they are selfish and mercantile in everything, but look among the "simple" and modest - these people know the price of communication and friendship. Do not choose by financial and appearance, many rich people have friends - the simplest, but also the most faithful.

If pseudo-friends come to you again for help, then tell them directly: “to go to those who are publicly called their own. best comrades, and you are not a vest that is only cry for when they are in need. You are a living person and also need support and attention.” It's hard to say, but you can do it! Your reaction will make them think about themselves and how they neglected you. Friendship is not based only on a one-sided division of the problem, let them turn to a psychologist for advice and do not fool you with the hope of friendship.

It seems to me that seeing your relationship with children, as you wrote above, you must have a wonderful family, because you will put all your efforts into it. And your future husband you can be both a friend and a vest, just like you dreamed of! And family happiness will cover all the hardships that you have suffered.

Dear girls, do not let others fool you, do not let them "lower you below the plinth", you deserve much better than you imagine! And you are not alone in this. If you have a similar situation, then let's share it together, it's better to speak out and listen to the advice of the same heroines as you and I. Support should always be, do not hide the negative for yourself, otherwise you will hate the weight of white light.



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