Women are often considered weak, but despite this, they have great power - the ability to inspire men to new exploits, wrapping them in their love and care, supporting them in any situation and unconditionally believing in the success of their chosen ones.

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But for some reason, not all girls know how to use their natural qualities correctly, so relationships with a man often end in disappointment, resentment and unhappy love. Every lady would like to know how to become the very one, loved and desired by men, how to create strong family and not relive difficult breakups again and again.

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How to become desirable for men

keep feeling long years with your loved one, it is quite possible to maintain passion and desire if you pay due attention to relationships and make daily efforts to create harmony in the family.

To conquer a bachelor or to return the former passion with your spouse, you don’t need to come up with something unusually new, you just need to know which girls like the vast majority of men. Some qualities that will help to achieve the location of any of them:

• a girl should always remain mysterious, with personal secrets and secrets;
• a woman should show a man that she needs his help;
• in any situation, a lady should try to look good;
• sexuality;
• a woman should not be a mother to a man;
• positive attitude under any circumstances.

To become a beloved and desired woman, you need to change yourself, your internal state. Finally deal with the causes of their grievances and neuroses, get rid of the eternal feeling of irritation and dissatisfaction with life. IN modern world there are many ways that can help in this - trainings and advice from famous psychologists, lectures on femininity, online self-acceptance courses and many others.

Mysteriousness

Men always show a special interest in girls who have their own personal lives, their own interests and little secrets. A loved one does not need to know absolutely everything. There are many topics that are much more suitable for talking with girlfriends than with a guy.

If a woman fully reveals herself and gives out all her secrets to a man, then she becomes less interesting, ceases to be a mysterious person. She is no longer so desirable, since the man looks at her as if she were open cards and knows everything about her in absentia.



Defenselessness

A well-known problem of our time is that girls are trying with all their might to achieve equality in society. They are ready to make serious decisions and take leadership positions. Ladies with great responsibility approach the solution of any problems, receive high wages and perform a number of male functions. All this directly affects the relationship with the stronger sex. Guys who have not achieved such a level in life and career feel uncomfortable against the backdrop of wealthy and serious young ladies.

Even if a woman earns more, at home with her man she should remain soft, tender and defenseless. It is not forbidden to say a few words about the work, but it is better to leave the commanding tone outside. Be sure to take an interest in things young man, support him in all endeavors and in no case belittle him as a man. Such behavior violates the harmony in the couple, the man withdraws into himself and conflict situations grow one after another.

Alone with a loved one, you should turn into a little defenseless girl who all the time needs a strong male shoulder. Even any little things that a girl is able to do herself, it is better to ask her man to do it. He must feel his importance, think that his presence is vital for a lady.



attractiveness

A woman will feel loved and desired if she devotes at least a minimum amount of time only to herself and caring for her body (skin).

It is often possible to meet such a phenomenon that after marriage and the birth of children, a girl completely forgets about herself, about her own appearance and beauty. She can meet her husband in a washed-out bathrobe, with a dirty head and a disgruntled face. Such a woman, even with very strong love spouses are unlikely to be desired.

Men are males by nature, unless a beautiful and beautiful woman awaits them at home. happy wife, then outside of it, nothing will prevent you from looking at attractive well-groomed girls who have enough time and desire for themselves.

Often a girl, for example, in maternity leave, may refer to a lack of funds and time. But this is not at all the case, it serves only as an excuse for lazy persons. You can go in for sports at home, as well as do a manicure, make up, wash your hair and make a face mask from improvised means. You can look well-groomed and neat in any situation.

Lack of guardianship

Most women have too developed maternal instinct. And while there is no child in the family, all guardianship and excessive care goes to the man. And this is the biggest mistake in a relationship. A man quickly gets used to this behavior of his wife and subconsciously already associates his wife with his mother. In this scenario, the "wife-mother" a priori will not be desirable.

To avoid such misunderstandings, a woman must understand that a man is no longer a child and is quite able to take care of himself. It is necessary to give the husband the opportunity to prove himself in everyday life, to show his skills and abilities, or try to teach him something, but in no case patronize.

More positive emotions

Any man will enjoy spending time in the company of a girl who radiates positivity and looks at life with positive side. It is worth learning to perceive all problems and failures with dignity, not to let it through yourself and in any situation to find pluses, not minuses.

A woman who steadfastly perceives all the blows of fate will definitely please a man. It is easy with such a lady, she does not burden her with her problems, she enjoys life and thinks positively.

To be desirable for your partner, you should not get hung up on problems, "take out the brain" because of trifles, heat up the situation. It would be best to simply relate to everything that happens, and focus only on the positive moments of life.

It is not easy to come to such a mindset, but it will definitely simplify and improve the lives of both men and women.

Diversity

Feelings and passions tend to cool down over time. A household routine appears, which becomes boring and no longer brings happiness. Monotony in everyday life and at work spoil relationships, they become boring and uninteresting, you want something new.

To remain desirable, it is advisable to periodically come up with new joint entertainment, organize family leisure, make life varied and rich.

It's not that difficult to do, it's worth spending time together and finding activities that could captivate both partners. You can do anything - visiting cinemas, performances, going to a skating rink or a zoo, etc.

The elementary preparation of lunch or dinner will easily bring new colors to the relationship, if you somehow diversify this process, introducing new actions.

Life is short, do not waste time on routine matters. At correct placement priorities and the necessary distribution of responsibilities, you can see how much easier life becomes.

self esteem

Self-respect under any circumstances is a very important part of the life of any person. It's about about women who do not want to love and accept themselves for who they are. This uncertainty is noticeable to others, and the male sex is especially felt female energy and vulnerability.

When a girl is confident in her irresistibility, she looks, thinks and feels differently without noticing it herself. Such a lady will never allow herself to be mistreated, she will not tolerate humiliation from even a beloved person.

A woman who respects herself, upholds her principles and pursues her goals and dreams, exudes confidence and beauty, she is always desirable, intrigues and fascinates men without much effort.

How to be sexy for a man

Any woman always wants to be sexy and attractive in the eyes of men. In the field of relationship psychology, there is an opinion that a girl is sexy if, when looking at her walk, look, neckline and skirt length, a man instantly experiences a natural instinct that causes desire.

A girl looks even sexier if she is confident and shows it. And a lady, closed from the outside world, unwilling to make decisions, most often causes only pity in men.

You can often see that ladies try to show their self-confidence with the help of clothes. Often they choose the wrong images and may look too vulgar. Each girl knows her strengths and weaknesses, but she does not know how to adjust her figure with clothes herself. A short miniskirt and a deep neckline will not always be appropriate. We must take into account the place of the meeting, environment and event style.

Such a factor as sexuality is influenced by well-groomed hair and nails, a beautiful gait and posture, shoes on high heels. All this will help to form an overall positive impression on the man.

Sex in a relationship

Girls do not understand how important men attach to sex inrelations. To remain sexy and desirable for your chosen one, you need to openly discuss with him all your desires and preferences regarding sex, and not be afraid to talk about your dissatisfaction, if any. loving man will definitely try to take all measures in order to deliver true pleasure to his lady.

There is such a problem in the psychology of sex that girls who are not satisfied with something in ordinary life, all their problems are transferred to bed. Because of this, they are unable to relax and get maximum pleasure. Women are always tense and dissatisfied, and men feel some discomfort, in connection with which understanding and harmony in the couple are disturbed, quarrels arise.

When a girl gets into bed with a loved one, she needs to try to disconnect from everything that she had to endure during the day. This time is only for two, so you need to learn how to switch and tune in to the right wave.

An intimate romantic setting will play its role and help you relax. Candles with pleasant smell, slow music, massage - all this is necessary for a complete sense of solitude and creating an atmosphere of love and harmony. sex life implies the complete absence of any complexes, embarrassment and misunderstanding.

How to please a man

Most women are deeply convinced that men cannot bring anything good into their lives. To like guys, you need to think about them in a positive way, believe in a happy future and not show your negative attitude from the first meetings.

Men love it when a lady is in good mood, a smile does not leave her face, she knows how to enjoy everyday little things.

Do not forget to gently flirt with guys. They love light flirting, but they usually do not allow their chosen one to do this. real lady should be able to smile in time, gracefully play with a shoe and sexually straighten a lock of hair. This behavior allows women to open up and fall in love with a man.

THE IMAGE OF ZAKHAR AND HIS ROLE IN THE DISCOVERY OF CHARACTER. In the novel Oblomov by I. A. Goncharov, the paradoxical double of the protagonist is his old and devoted serf servant Zakhar, who remains faithful to family portraits, legends about ancient life and the importance of the Oblomovs' house.

When we first meet, we meet an elderly man who is in his fifties. In his youth, he served as a footman in a manor house in Oblomovka, then he was promoted to uncle to Ilya Ilyich, and later, in St. Petersburg, became his valet.

By nature, Zakhar was lazy. He was born and raised in a blessed corner, where "everything is quiet and sleepy." Like all the serfs of the Oblomovs, he was of a quiet disposition, not subject to strong passions, did not strive for daring enterprises, and had the most limited ideas about the outside world. All the peasants in Oblomovka lived in the same quiet happy life, because they were convinced "that all others live in exactly the same way and that otherwise is a sin."

The lackey service developed in Zakhar the indolence received from nature to the extreme limits. We learn that in his youth he was "an agile, gluttonous and crafty guy" (this is how Oblomov remembers him). When he became a lackey, his duty was to escort the gentlemen to church and guests. At first he was languishing with boredom, he tried to run away from the hallway, but master Ilya Ivanovich stopped these attempts. More and more often Zakhar remained dozing in the hallway, gossiping in the servants' room and in the kitchen, or stood at the gate for hours. After he was promoted to uncle to little Ilyusha, he began to consider himself an aristocratic accessory of a manor house, intended for the fullness and splendor of an old family. He dressed in the morning and undressed the barchon in the evening, and the rest of the time he did nothing.

Zakhar was brought up and acquired manners in the countryside, in the open and free air, where nothing hindered his movements, therefore, once in the city, in the cramped space of an apartment, he looks awkward and feels awkward. Therefore, he tries not to "change not only the image given to him by God, but also his costume, in which he walked in the village."

The writer endowed Zakhar with an expressive and comical appearance. main detail his portraits are "naked as a knee, the skull" and "immensely wide" and thick with graying sideburns, "each of which would be enough for three beards." He cherishes his sideburns, the aristocratic ornament of many of the servants he saw in his childhood. Sideburns remind Zakhar of his former service and the former greatness of the Oblomovs' house, they also capture the tragic changes in his fate: "... the sideburns were still large, but crumpled and tangled, like felt, in each one it was definitely put on whom snow". But clothes, despite the desire "not to change," are the most dynamic detail in the image of Zakhar. It denotes all stages of his career as a servant. In Oblomovka, Zakhar wore a livery - uniform footmen, embroidered with tinsel braid. In St. Petersburg on Gorokhovaya, he changed his livery to a frock coat with copper buttons, and in Pshenitsyna's house he wears strange-looking clothes. The livery, frock coat, jacket, faded overcoat without one floor seem to repeat Oblomov's costumes (dressing gown, beautifully tailored frock coat and again a dressing gown).

Zakhar married at the age of fifty-five, "whether as a result of a break with the godfather or because of the conviction that a person should be married." He took as his wife a "living, agile woman" Anisya from the St. Petersburg servants. Anisya voluntarily took on all the duties of the house and unconsciously shared the fate of her husband, inextricably linked with life, home and special Ilya Ilyich Oblomov.

Zakhar - mirror reflection Oblomov. “The master seemed to think: “Well, brother, you are even more Oblomov than I myself,” and Zakhar almost thought: “You're lying! You are a master of speaking tricky and miserable words, but you don’t care about dust and cobwebs. ” Zakhar is generally distinguished by constant grumbling and obstinacy, stubbornness, slowness, which has already been mentioned, as well as slovenliness, untidiness and admiration for the nobility, but above all - laziness. Once and for all, having determined for himself the scope of his duties, he tried never to cross over for him and “by no means could he be forced to introduce a new permanent article in the circle of occupations outlined by him. His desire to isolate himself from the new, metropolitan life (which brings with it new responsibilities) and his laziness, he tries to justify even philosophically. That is why he is likened to Oblomov, "fused with him."

Zakhar and Oblomov constantly quarrel. Conflicts arise because of Zakhar's negligence and laziness, and in such skirmishes he, as a rule, comes out victorious. As soon as the need arises to do something around the house, Zakhar proves that this will entail enormous fuss, knowing full well that the very thought of any action in the house horrifies Ilya Ilyich. But Oblomov is pissed off not so much by the laziness of the servant as by his spiritual rudeness and tactlessness. During his life, Zakhar did not change not only his appearance and habits, did not go beyond the circle of his duties, he also did not change his inner essence, remaining indifferent to the feelings and experiences of the master.

Despite the ability to methodically harass each other, Zakhar and Ilya Ilyich are inextricably linked, simply inconceivable without each other. Without the help of Zakhar, Oblomov "could neither get up, nor go to bed, nor be combed and shod, nor dine." Zakhar, on the other hand, “did not know how to imagine another gentleman, except for Ilya Ilyich, another existence, how to dress, feed him, be rude to him, dissemble, lie, and at the same time inwardly revere him.” He is infinitely faithful and devoted to his master and everything that bears the name of Oblomov. He, without hesitation, would have burned or drowned for the master. And he loved Oblomovka, "like a cat his attic, a horse - a stall, a dog - a kennel in which he was born and raised."

It is Zakhar who is the first and last authority that prevents Oblomov from breaking out, leaving the circle of Oblomovism. It was he who, with his rudeness and earthiness, destroyed, albeit unwittingly, in Oblomov's imagination, the poetic ideal of a wedding with Olga. After the words of Zakhar: “So, there will be a wedding after Christmas? ... It is known which one: yours! .. After all, you are getting married? ... The Ilyinsky people said back in the summer ... Did I make it up? - the colors in Oblomov's romantic dreams become different. He clearly saw suddenly that “immediately, in the crowd, there was a rude, untidy Zakhar and the entire Ilyinsky household, a row of carriages, strangers, coldly curious faces ... everything seemed so boring, terrible ...” After the death of Ilya Ilyich Oblomov, Zakhar’s fate also ends . He cannot live in someone else's house, he cannot serve another master. Such servants as Zakhar did not suit the new time and the new masters, who did not forgive the servants for awkwardness, untidiness and rudeness. Now competent, agile, dexterous and skillful lackeys, valets, porters were required. Zakharov's time has passed.

One of the responses to Goncharov's novel said that Zakhar and Oblomov "grew up on the same soil, were saturated with the same juices."

The feudal way of life shaped both the master and his servant, deprived both of them of respect for work, brought up idleness and idleness. Zakhar is really almost “even more Oblomovs” than Ilya Ilyich himself. The value of this image is that Zakhar represents all the serfs of Oblomovka in the novel. He is one of the "three hundred Zakharov", and his main function is to typify and additionally outline the image central hero. But at the same time, it is interesting and colorful in itself. It is no coincidence that a special chapter of the first part is dedicated to him in the novel, and critics called him "a whole poem" about the past of Russia.

The novel "Oblomov" is one of the peaks of creativity of the great Russian writer and publicist I.A. Goncharov. The work was published back in 1859, but the discussions of critics around its protagonist and other characters have not subsided to this day. In Oblomov, both attractive and, at times, repulsive sides of his controversial nature. At the same time, he seems kind, gentle, generous and, at the same time, a rather lazy gentleman who is absolutely not adapted to active life, has no interests and goals.

The serf Zakhar is a kind of peculiar clone of Oblomov, but reflected in a crooked mirror.

The image of the servants plays the most important ideological and compositional role in the work. Zakhar not only "reflects" the worst features of Oblomov, but also indirectly affects the course of the physical and moral extinction of the protagonist.

During the story, Zakhar is a wise man, who is well over fifty. In his youth, he was a lackey in a landowner's house in Oblomovka, then he was assigned to uncles to the young Ilya, and later, in St. Petersburg, he already became a valet. Zakhar's laziness is his innate, natural trait. He was born and grew up in the quietest corner of Russia, where "everything is quiet and sleepy." The serfs in the village of Oblomovka lived happily and measuredly, because they believed: this is the only way, and not otherwise, to plow the land, sow oats, reap and trade in the harvest.

They were absolutely sure "that all others live in exactly the same way and that otherwise is a sin." Service as a lackey multiplied in Zakhar that portion of laziness that he received from birth to the limit. When our hero began to serve as a footman, he had to accompany the gentlemen on trips to visit and serve in the church. For the rest of the time, Zakhar slept in the hallway, gossiped with the cooks and servants in the kitchen, and stood idle at the gate for many hours. As soon as he became an uncle to little Ilya, he immediately imagined himself an aristocrat. Therefore, except for the morning and evening toilet of the baby, he no longer cared about anything.

Zakhar is fantastically awkward. Any thing in his clumsy hands falls or breaks. Oblomov is an absolute lazy person, he does practically nothing. His servant, in fact, too: he is trying to designate only the appearance of at least some kind of activity. Zakhar's awkwardness is a direct reflection of Oblomov's life.

Clothing is another the most important detail in the image of Oblomov's servant, as well as in the image of the main character of the novel. The wardrobe of the characters seems to be changing, but in fact, its owners do not undergo changes. Zakhar constantly wears clothes that are not entirely clear. First, the livery, then the frock coat, the jacket, the faded overcoat with the missing hollow undoubtedly copy the outfits of Ilya Ilyich: dressing gown - frock coat - gown. A comfortable soft bathrobe is a kind of symbol of the protagonist's nobility. The wardrobe items of Oblomov's servant are also symbolic. After the death of the owner, Zakhar began to wear an overcoat without one floor. He seems to have parted with his half - his beloved master, he is like a certain thing that has suddenly lost its owner.

There is undoubtedly a deep similarity between Zakhar and Oblomov. The servant of the protagonist embodies the worst side of Oblomov - nobility, laziness and idleness. With the death of the protagonist, the fate of his servant ends. Zakhar cannot live in other places, cannot serve with other masters. Goncharov shows how feudal lordly orders spiritually kill a person, deprive him of a goal in life.

Updated: 2013-02-20

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The image of Zakhar and his role in revealing the character of the protagonist of the novel by I. A. Goncharov “Oblomov”

Collection of essays: The image of Zakhar and his role in revealing the character of the protagonist of the novel by I. A. Goncharov "Oblomov"

"Oblomov" - the pinnacle of I. A. Goncharov's work. Was published in 1859, but critics' disputes around the character of the protagonist still do not subside. Both attractive and repulsive features are intertwined in Oblomov. On the one hand, it is soft, kind, On the other hand, he is a lazy gentleman, not adapted to life, without goals and interests.

Zakhar is a kind of double of the protagonist, false mirror Oblomov. The image of Zakhar plays an important ideological and compositional role in the novel. The servant not only "reflects" the worst in Oblomov, but also in a certain way influences the process of moral and physical extinction of Ilya Ilyich.

Zakhar is the serf of the Oblomovs. During the action of the novel, the servant - old man who is fifty years old. In his youth, he served as a lackey in a manor house in Oblomovka, then he was promoted to uncle to Ilya Ilyich, later, in St. Petersburg, he became his valet. Laziness is given to Zakhar by nature. He was born and raised in a blessed corner, where "everything is quiet and sleepy." The peasants in Oblomovka lived a happy life, because they thought: it is impossible to plow, sow, reap, sell in any other way. They were sure "that all the others live exactly likewise, and anything else is a sin.” The lackey service developed in Zakhar the laziness received from nature, to the extreme limits. In his youth, he was "an agile, gluttonous and crafty guy." When he became a footman, it became his duty to escort the gentlemen to church and guests. was promoted to uncles to little Oblomov, Zakhar began to consider himself an aristocratic affiliation of the manor house... He dressed in the morning and undressed the barchon in the evening, and the rest of the time he did nothing.

Zakhar is very awkward. Everything falls out of his hands, everything breaks in his hands: "Another thing ... stands for three years, four in place - nothing; as soon as he takes it, you look - it's broken." Oblomov does nothing at all, Zakhar, in principle, too: he creates only the appearance of activity.His awkwardness is a reflection of the same inability to live that exists in Ilya Ilyich.

The main detail of the portrait of Zakhar are sideburns, immensely wide and thick, with gray hair, "each of which would be enough for three beards." They, like a frock coat and livery, remind of the former greatness master's house. Zakhar cherishes his sideburns, an aristocratic adornment of many of the servants he saw as a child.

Zakhar married at fifty-five. Anisya, "a lively, agile woman," became his chosen one. Anisya possessed all the qualities that Zakhar did not have: agility, lightness, flexibility. Against the background of Anisya, Zakhar's helplessness stands out brighter. husband, Zakhar could not forgive her for this and sought to humiliate or offend her. Despite Zakhar's hostile attitude, Anisya becomes his savior. She smooths out conflicts between the master and the servant. After the death of Oblomov, Zakhar completely passes into the care of Anisya. Without her, he becomes helpless: “When Anisya was alive, I didn’t stagger, there was a piece of bread, but when she died of cholera ... the baryn’s brother didn’t want to keep me, they called me a parasite.” Family life Zahara presents the inevitable everyday ending romantic love Oblomov. Olga Ilyinskaya did not want to accept Oblomov as he is, did not want to become a nanny for him; like Anisya for Zakhar.

On the one hand, Zakhar is boundlessly devoted to the master, and on the other, under the influence of life in the city, he learned to lie and be rude to Oblomov, drank with friends at his expense, robbed Ilya Ilyich, gossiped about him. Ilya Ilyich would have been forced to lead such a way of life in a different version, on a different level in " high society". In this regard, Zakhar is the moral antipode of Oblomov. Ilya Ilyich has a mind, good inclinations, he rebels against worldly fuss, loves. Zakhar is a dark, serf peasant, long years of slavery have corrupted him, he has no worthy features.

This hero is not able to understand the feelings of the master. For him, Oblomov is also a kind of property. He is jealous of him for Olga Ilyinskaya. So, on the eve of the arrival of the girl, Oblomov asks Zakhar to leave the house, but he muffledly refuses, excuses himself, looks lazily out the window. With his rudeness, earthiness, Zakhar destroys in Oblomov's imagination the poetic ideal of a wedding and family happiness. The colors in Oblomov's romantic dreams become different. He suddenly saw clearly that “right there, in the crowd, was the rude, untidy Zakhar and the entire Ilyinsky household, a row of carriages, strangers, coldly curious faces ... everything seemed so boring, terrible ...” Zakhar never changes his habits, it doesn’t come out for the circle of his duties. It is Zakhar who prevents the master's attempts to get out of the state of Oblomovism. To Oblomov's message about his intention to go abroad, Zakhar ironically remarks: "And who will take off your boots there? Yes, you will be lost there without me!

Despite the constant quarrels between the servant and the master, they cannot do without one another. Without the help of Zakhar, Ilya Ilyich "could neither get up, nor go to bed, nor be combed and shod, nor dine." Zakhar "could not imagine another master, except for Ilya Ilyich, another existence, how to dress, feed him, be rude to him , dissemble, lie and at the same time inwardly revere him.

Zakhar is a mirror image of Oblomov, there is a deep similarity between them. Zakhar embodies one of worst features the owner - nobility, idleness. After the death of Oblomov, Zakhara also ends. He cannot live in other houses, he cannot serve in other places. The author shows how feudal orders spiritually devastate a person, deprive him of a goal in life. Oblomov did not find his way, did nothing to save his best qualities. N. A. Dobrolyubov wrote about Oblomov: "He is the slave of his serf Zakhar, and it is difficult to decide which of them is more subject to the authority of the other."

You have read the finished development: The image of Zakhar and his role in revealing the character of the protagonist of the novel by I. A. Goncharov “Oblomov”

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