By itself, the term "defeat" says that you participated in the struggle and did not win. It happens. And then it all depends on how you assess the situation. Situations don't matter, they just happen. And here you may not care. It all depends on what attitude you choose to have with her.
Choice 1. You chose to make the outcome of your struggle super-meaningful. That is, you allowed only one option - victory and nothing more. And when it turned out that reality did not coincide with your super-significant expectation, you gave the strongest emotional reaction.
Emotional reactions are of two types.
If your subconscious mind believes that you can influence the situation and change it, then it gives you a boost of energy. You go into a state of excitement (irritation, anger), and go to fight "for the truth." Or, much worse, you do not go anywhere, but sit still and unsuccessfully try to extinguish the energy of struggle excited in your body. As a result, you “drive” this energy into an emotional block, which will then torment you for many years, reminding you of your defeat.
If your subconscious comes to the conclusion that “the train has left” and nothing can be changed (for example, the desired position is occupied), then it takes energy from you, and you fall into a semi-depressive state, feeling hopelessness and meaninglessness of life.
This is a very unpleasant state that everyone experienced in their personal lives, when, for example, a loved one suddenly broke off relations with you. The same states also take place at work, when something that you mentally already considered “your own” is suddenly destroyed, and life without which seems empty and meaningless to you.
If you do not use special techniques, then you will get out of this energetically “failed” state for a couple of years.
What can be changed here?
Option 2: Make a different initial choice.
If you are going to achieve some goal, you can initially take the position “life is a game”, and then you, as an athlete, are mentally prepared for any outcome of the game. If you lose, it is, of course, unpleasant. But this is not a reason to plunge into depression for years and into the state of an “eternally offended” bilious person, who was once undeservedly bypassed in his expectations. Imagine that football players or hockey players would go into depression after each loss. What would our sport be like? And he is not like that. Lose today, win tomorrow. And that's it, there is no reason to worry. There are reasons to work on improving your skills.
This is the mindset that you need to take as a basis on the way to your goal.
But let's say you didn't know about "Option 2" and have already experienced what you would rate as "defeat". Although this is just an implementation of one of the options event development. And you rated it as a "defeat". What can be done to quickly get rid of the consequences of a strong emotional reaction?
If you gave a reaction according to the “male” type: “goats, I’ll kill everyone”, and now this irritation again and again brings back your thoughts about losing and thoughts about what needed to be done are spinning in your head in an endless series, then the way out is obvious.
You need to remove from your body that emotional block that now controls your behavior and again and again plunges you into an internal struggle. It's just an emotional charge that you can quickly get rid of.
You can go to two or three sessions of active breathing (holotropic, rebirthing), and he will leave.
You can go to a psychologist, and he will take energy from your experience with long conversations. Or you can work with the "Self-auditing" technique, that is, to retell your experience to yourself in all the smallest details. Fifty times in front of a mirror - and everything will pass.
You can work with the technique of forgiveness. On the site "Self-transformation Assistant" on the page "Step 1" you can see detailed instructions on how to write the "Extended Forgiveness Formula". Then you can write down your formula there and work with it there using the “Effective Forgiveness” technique, which connects the repetition of forgiveness phrases with active breathing. In the end, you will take energy from your experience, and it will remain just an insignificant memory of an event that once took place. You can start moving towards new goals.
Another option is when, according to the results of evaluating the results of the struggle, you went into a semi-depressive state. This is the "feminine" way of responding.
Why does the subconscious take energy from us when an event occurs with which we categorically disagree, but cannot change it? It protects us from doing wrong things that could threaten your life (“beloved is gone - I will commit suicide” - popular entertainment at a young age).
In order for your energy to return to you, and you start moving towards new goals again, you need to convince the body that the event that has taken place is “up to the lantern” for you. That you no longer view it as a tragedy, but look at it as just an ordinary failure, of which there are many.
Here, too, it doesn't hurt to work with the forgiveness technique first, but the focus should be on replacing your current "if I don't take this position, my life will end" belief with something more positive. For example, to the belief “I easily and calmly perceive any result of my efforts to occupy a position (here you need to indicate which position in question)". And then this new belief needs to be loaded into oneself so that it displaces the one already there.
You have all heard about working with affirmations - the technique of repeatedly repeating the positive statement you need. Or its repeated rewriting. This is a weak technique that takes too much time, and does not give the desired result when not enough effort is applied.
I suggest using the "Effective Self-Programming" technique - it includes mentally pronouncing the settings you need in active breathing mode.
The technique is implemented on the website "Self-transformation Assistant" on the page "Step 2". On this page, you first write down the settings you want to get rid of. Then, according to certain rules, write down the opposite positive attitudes. And then, in active breathing mode, load them into yourself.
This technology works and gives fairly fast results. For example, you can get rid of the strongest anxiety about the destruction of some of your expectations, for example, breaking up a relationship in just a month or two of work for half an hour a day.
You can read more about this technology on the website “Self-Transformation Assistant” under the “Read” button in the book “Start Life Again. Four steps to new reality».
So there are tools for quickly erasing your usual reactions to situations that you evaluate as defeats. You just need to use them. Usually this does not happen, since people perform most of their actions under the influence of habitual behavior patterns, without thinking about it. And these models, in turn, do not imply that you can quickly get out of experiences. On the contrary, there is an algorithm of long emotional reactions, which we stupidly work out.
But that is another topic.
There are many situations in life when everything ends not our way. How to deal with it? How to teach a child to accept defeat with dignity? What is absolutely impossible to lose? Priest Vitaly Vorona, Rector of the Church of the Pochaev Icon Mother of God Kramatorsk, helped us understand these difficult issues.
Success or failure?
Before you understand how to lose, it is worth defining what success is, what behind this concept is for us. Very often, victories and losses are not at all what they seemed at first. If we take the most tall example- the life of our Lord Jesus Christ, - then from a worldly point of view, He lost: he was betrayed, scolded, ascended the Cross, on which he died. But after some time, this defeat turned into the greatest victory: the salvation of the whole world. Or the first canonized Russian saints, Boris and Gleb - they also failed: they were killed, and the power went to another person.
Goals and victories are different, it all depends on the point of view and perspectives. It is not always easy to assess the situation in real time. It is necessary to see what results what is happening will bring, and only then can we say whether it was a success or a defeat. King Herod was considered by many contemporaries to be like a god. He had a special honor, dressed in rich clothes, sat on the throne, had eloquence, but it all ended very badly: he fell ill terrible disease, and he was literally eaten by worms.
Against all odds, don't give up
Wikipedia gives the following definition: “Success is the achievement of some goal or result in the business begun; public acceptance". What success should be depends on the person and the goals he has set for himself. What may be a failure for one may be a victory for another and have a deep meaning.
It is very important to teach children to treat losses correctly, because success is possible only through overcoming defeats and failures. This is evidenced by numerous achievements and scientific discoveries, many of which were not spontaneous, but were the result of hard work in achieving the goal. Goals, it would seem, illogical and impossible, but there were people who had the desire to achieve it. A classic example is Edison and his light bulb. To find the right material for the filament, he had to try six thousand options. It is important not to give up when you fail. It is necessary to convey to the children that losing is not when you fail, but when you refuse to succeed.
It is important not only not to be afraid to lose, but also to set goals correctly. All human life is a struggle between good and evil, a daily choice between them. For the right goal-setting, the correct system of values is important. This also needs to be taught to children, but first you need to learn it yourself. Children usually do not what we tell them, but what we teach them. own example. You can tell anything in theory, but if we do not act as we say, it will be even worse than if we did not teach anything at all. Therefore, first of all, you yourself need to learn how to adequately lose and bet the right goals.
The practice of helping children
If we talk about how to practically teach a child to adequately accept a loss, then we must start from age. For example, children under five years of age have a completely different way of thinking than ten-year-olds. Moreover, they themselves can often teach us a lot. But even at this age, we notice in them certain inclinations of character, on which, among other things, the ability to lose depends. It will be easier for a phlegmatic child to survive a loss than for a sanguine or choleric child.
In such a situation, you just need to support the child. Try to make love come first. First, we, adults, must believe and understand that success is impossible without falls and defeats. Secondly, we must show that our attitude towards the child is in no way connected with his success or failure. He must believe that he is loved, and loved not for victories. Thirdly, it is important to teach that, despite failures, one must still try to reach the goal. If he does not want to do this - and there is always such a temptation - it will be necessary to convince him. I think that it is categorically impossible to quit what has been started.
Don't lose life
In the same way, we, adults, should not lose our lives - not to lose the most important goal of our existence, which will sanctify all the goals that we set for ourselves every day. So we get up in the morning, drink some tea, some coffee, and some cocoa, and in the meantime set goals for ourselves: what to do during the coming day. Our day is filled with meaning. But if we do not have main goal- salvation of the soul - then these daily tasks can become false.
It may happen that, approaching the end of our lives, we will see: the achievement of all worldly goals is left behind. We still have a certain period of time, but we do not know how to fill it. If we set ourselves a goal that will lie beyond the limits of our earthly existence, then, firstly, we will protect ourselves from such a situation. Secondly, our daily tasks will remain the same in nature, but will be consecrated with a different meaning: the search for the key to paradise. This key is love. The kingdom of heaven is the kingdom of love, and he who does not have it cannot enter there. This means that he will not be able to achieve the most important, most genuine success of his life.
About humility and SMS from God
The main goal in life cannot be achieved without humility. Without it, you can't learn to lose, and if you don't know how to lose, you won't learn to win. If we are not humble, then our life and attempts to win will be akin to scourging: in the end, a person simply cannot stand the pain of disappointment. Humility is when we accept the will of God, entrust ourselves to it. We must try to accept everything that we have, and think about how we can develop what is given to us. An ignoramus can become an erudite if he is a humble ignoramus, that is, if he takes his situation for granted and does not stop trying to correct it.
Often we discuss the task of humility with these people. They say: you, Orthodox, consider yourself sinners, poking around in yourself, what's the point? And the point is to understand who I really am. Am I really who I think I am? The Lord helps to stop stepping on the same rake, to reach Right way. And the failures that happen along the way are SMS from God that He sends to us when we go the wrong way.
Co-creation with God
Let us recall the parable of the talents: the one who did not increase what was given by the master lost. The Lord, when he gives talent, does not indicate exactly how to implement it. This is our co-creation with God: no matter how you multiply your talents, it is important to multiply. This is something that absolutely cannot be lost. You need to continue to work, look for ways to realize it, do not stop on this path, because if you stop, then you die - let you still walk, but you no longer live inside, you lost your life. Non-church people remain so until they touch the main goal. As soon as they understand that they need to set the bar as high as possible, in eternity, then any segment of life is filled with meaning, sanctified. The Lord sanctifies it, brings His order into it, and this is the most important thing.
Once again about the children: it is not a great achievement to raise a successful Herod. It is important to give children the opportunity to joyfully go through life. Failure is a stepping stone to success. The faster you get through them, the faster you will reach your goal. Therefore, defeats should be perceived not as a result, but as new point countdown closer to the target than the previous one.
Recorded by Ekaterina Shcherbakova
Official comment:
Direction allows you to reflect on victory and defeat in different aspects: socio-historical, moral and philosophical,
psychological. Reasoning can be connected both with external conflict events in the life of a person, country, world, and with the internal struggle of a person with himself, its causes and results.
IN literary works often shows the ambiguity and relativity of the concepts of "victory" and "defeat" in different historical conditions and life situations.
Aphorisms and sayings famous people:
The Greatest Victory- victory over oneself.
Cicero
The possibility that we may be defeated in battle should not prevent us from fighting for a cause that we consider just.
A. Lincoln
Man is not created to suffer defeat... Man can be destroyed, but he cannot be defeated.
E. Hemingway
Be proud only of the victories you have won over yourself.
Tungsten
Socio-historical aspect
Here we will talk about external conflict social groups, states, about military actions and political struggle.
Peru A. de Saint-Exupery owns a paradoxical, at first glance, statement: "Victory weakens the people - defeat awakens new forces in it ...". We find confirmation of the correctness of this idea in Russian literature.
"The Tale of Igor's Campaign" - famous monument literature Ancient Rus'. The plot is based on the unsuccessful campaign of the Russian princes against the Polovtsians, organized by the Novgorod-Seversky prince Igor Svyatoslavich in 1185. main idea- the idea of the unity of the Russian land. Princely civil strife, weakening the Russian land and leading to ruin by its enemies, make the author bitterly sad and complain; victory over enemies fills his soul with ardent delight. However, the defeat, not the victory, is described in this work. ancient Russian literature, because it is the defeat that contributes to the rethinking of the previous behavior, the acquisition of a new view of the world and of oneself. That is, defeat stimulates Russian soldiers to victories and exploits.
The author of the Lay addresses all the Russian princes in turn, as if calling them to account and demandingly reminding them of their duty to their homeland. He calls them to defend the Russian land, "to block the gates of the field" with their sharp arrows. And therefore, although the author writes about defeat, there is not even a shadow of despondency in the Lay. The "Word" is as concise and laconic as Igor's appeals to his squad. This is the call before the fight. The whole poem, as it were, is turned to the future, permeated with concern for this future. A poem about victory would be a poem of triumph and joy. Victory is the end of the battle, while defeat for the author of the Lay is only the beginning of the battle. The battle with the steppe enemy is not yet over. The defeat should unite the Russians. The author of the Lay calls not to a feast of triumph, but to a feast-battle. This is written in the article "The Word about the campaign of Igor Svyatoslavich" D.S. Likhachev.
The "Word" ends happily - with the return of Igor to the Russian land and the singing of glory to him at the entrance to Kyiv. So, despite the fact that the “Word” is dedicated to the defeat of Igor, it is full of confidence in the power of the Russians, full of faith in the glorious future of the Russian land, in victory over the enemy.
The history of mankind consists of victories and defeats in wars. In the novel "War and Peace" L.N. Tolstoy describes the participation of Russia and Austria in the war against Napoleon. Drawing the events of 1805-1807, Tolstoy shows that this war was imposed on the peoples. Russian soldiers, being far from their homeland, do not understand the purpose of this war, they do not want to lay down their lives senselessly. Kutuzov understands better than many the uselessness of this campaign for Russia. He sees the indifference of the allies, the desire of Austria to fight by proxy. Kutuzov protects his troops in every possible way, delaying their advance to the borders of France. This is explained not by distrust of the military skill and heroism of the Russians, but by the desire to save them from senseless slaughter. When the battle turned out to be inevitable, the Russian soldiers showed their constant readiness to help the allies, to take on main blow. For example, a detachment of four thousand under the command of Bagration near the village of Shengraben held back the onslaught of the enemy, "eight times" outnumbering him. This made it possible for the main forces to advance. The miracles of heroism were shown by the unit of officer Timokhin. It not only did not retreat, but struck back, which saved the flank units of the army. The real hero of the Shengraben battle was the courageous, resolute, but modest captain Tushin before his superiors. So thanks in large part to Russian troops the battle of Shengraben was won, and this gave strength and inspiration to the sovereigns of Russia and Austria. Blinded by victories, preoccupied mainly with narcissism, holding military reviews and balls, these two men led their armies to defeat at Austerlitz. So it turned out that one of the reasons for the defeat of the Russian troops under the sky of Austerlitz was the victory at Shengraben, which did not allow an objective assessment of the balance of power.
All the senselessness of the campaign is shown by the writer in the preparation of the highest generals for the battle of Austerlitz. So, the military council before the battle of Austerlitz does not resemble advice, but an exhibition of vanities, all disputes were not conducted with the goal of reaching a better and correct solution, but, as Tolstoy writes, “... it was obvious that the goal ... of objections consisted mainly in the desire let General Weyrother feel, as self-confidently as schoolchildren, who read his disposition, that he was dealing not only with fools, but with people who could teach him in military affairs.
But still main reason We see the victories and defeats of the Russian troops in the confrontation with Napoleon when comparing Austerlitz and Borodin. Speaking with Pierre about the upcoming battle of Borodino, Andrei Bolkonsky recalls the reason for the defeat at Austerlitz: “The battle is won by the one who firmly decided to win it. Why did we lose the battle at Austerlitz? .. We told ourselves very early that we lost the battle, and lost And we said this because we had no reason to fight: we wanted to leave the battlefield as soon as possible. "We lost - well, run!" We ran. If we had not said this before evening, God knows what would have happened. And tomorrow we won't say that." L. Tolstoy shows a significant difference between the two campaigns: 1805-1807 and 1812. The fate of Russia was decided on the Borodino field. Here, the Russian people had no desire to save themselves, no indifference to what was happening. Here, as Lermontov says, "and we promised to die, and we kept the oath of allegiance in the Battle of Borodino."
Another opportunity to speculate about how a victory in one battle can turn into a defeat in a war is provided by the outcome of the Battle of Borodino, in which Russian troops gain a moral victory over the French. The moral defeat of Napoleon's troops near Moscow is the beginning of the defeat of his army.
The Civil War was so significant event in the history of Russia, that it could not but be reflected in fiction. The basis for the reasoning of graduates can be "Don stories", " Quiet Don» M.A. Sholokhov.
When one country goes to war with another, terrible events: hatred and the desire to defend themselves make people kill their own kind, women and the elderly are left alone, children grow up as orphans, cultural and material values cities are destroyed. But the warring parties have a goal - to defeat the enemy at any cost. And every war has a result - victory or defeat. Victory is sweet and immediately justifies all losses, defeat is tragic and sad, but it is the starting point for some other life. But "in civil war every victory is a defeat" (Lucian).
Life story central hero epic novel by M. Sholokhov "The Quiet Don" by Grigory Melekhov, which reflected the drama of the fate of the Don Cossacks, confirms this idea. War cripples from the inside and destroys all the most precious that people have. It forces the heroes to take a fresh look at the problems of duty and justice, to seek the truth and not find it in any of the warring camps. Once at the Reds, Grigory sees all the same as the Whites, cruelty, intransigence, thirst for the blood of enemies. Melekhov rushes between the two belligerents. Everywhere he encounters violence and cruelty, which he cannot accept, and therefore cannot take one side. The result is logical: “Like a steppe scorched by fires, Grigory’s life became black ...”.
Moral-philosophical and psychological aspects
Victory is not only success in battle. To win, according to the dictionary of synonyms, is to overcome, overpower, overcome. And often not so much the enemy as himself. Consider a number of works from this point of view.
A.S. Griboyedov "Woe from Wit". The conflict of the play is a unity of two principles: public and personal. Being an honest, noble, progressive-minded, freedom-loving person, main character Chatsky opposes the Famus society. He condemns the inhumanity of serfdom, recalling "Nestor of noble scoundrels", who exchanged his faithful servants for three greyhounds; he is disgusted by the lack of freedom of thought in noble society: "Yes, and who in Moscow did not shut up lunches, dinners and dances?". He does not recognize servility and sycophancy: "Who needs it: for those who are arrogant, they lie in the dust, and for those who are higher, flattery, like lace, was woven." Chatsky is full of sincere patriotism: “Will we ever rise again from the foreign power of fashion? So that our smart, peppy people, although by language, do not consider us Germans. He strives to serve the “cause”, and not individuals, he “would be glad to serve, it’s sickening to serve.” Society is offended and, defending itself, declares Chatsky crazy. Its drama is exacerbated by a sense of ardent but unrequited love to Famusov's daughter Sofya. Chatsky does not make an attempt to understand Sophia, it is difficult for him to understand why Sophia does not love him, because his love for her speeds up “every heartbeat”, although “the whole world seemed to him dust and vanity.” Chatsky's blindness with passion can justify him: his "mind and heart are out of tune." The psychological conflict turns into a social conflict. Society unanimously comes to the conclusion: "crazy in everything ...". Crazy society is not terrible. Chatsky decides to "search around the world where the offended feeling has a corner."
I.A. Goncharov assessed the finale of the play as follows: “Chatsky is broken by the number old force, inflicting on her in turn death blow the quality of the new power." Chatsky does not give up his ideals, he only frees himself from illusions. Chatsky's stay in Famusov's house shook the inviolability of the foundations Famus Society. Sophia says: “I am ashamed of myself!”
Therefore, the defeat of Chatsky is only a temporary defeat and only his personal drama. On a public scale, "the victory of the Chatskys is inevitable." The “past century” will be replaced by the “current century”, and the views of the comedy hero Griboyedov will win.
A.N. Ostrovsky "Thunderstorm". Graduates can reflect on the question of whether Katerina's death is a victory or defeat. It is difficult to give an unambiguous answer to this question. Too many reasons led to a terrible ending. The playwright sees the tragedy of Katerina's position in the fact that she comes into conflict not only with Kalinov's family customs but also with itself. The straightforwardness of Ostrovsky's heroine is one of the sources of her tragedy. Katerina is pure in soul - lies and debauchery are alien and disgusting to her. She understands that, having fallen in love with Boris, she violated moral law. “Ah, Varya,” she complains, “I have a sin on my mind! How much I, poor thing, wept, no matter what I did to myself! I can't get away from this sin. Nowhere to go. After all, this is not good, because this is a terrible sin, Varenka, that I love another? Through the whole play, there is a painful struggle in Katerina's mind between the understanding of her wrong, her sinfulness and a vague, but more and more powerful sense of her right to human life. But the play ends with Katerina's moral victory over the dark forces that torment her. She expiates her guilt immeasurably, and escapes bondage and humiliation by the only path that has been opened to her. Her decision to die, if only not to remain a slave, expresses, according to Dobrolyubov, "the need for the emerging movement of Russian life." And this decision comes to Katerina along with internal self-justification. She dies because she considers death the only worthy outcome, the only way to preserve the higher that lived in her. The idea that Katerina's death is in fact a moral victory, the triumph of the real Russian soul over the forces of the "dark kingdom" of the Wild and Kabanovs, is also strengthened by the reaction of other heroes of the play to her death. For example, Tikhon, Katerina's husband, for the first time in his life expressed his own opinion, for the first time decided to protest against the suffocating foundations of his family, joining (even if only for a moment) in the fight against " dark kingdom". "You ruined her, you, you..." he exclaims, turning to his mother, before whom he has trembled all his life.
I.S. Turgenev "Fathers and Sons". The writer shows in his novel the struggle between worldviews of two political trends. The plot of the novel is built on the opposition of the views of Pavel Petrovich Kirsanov and Evgeny Bazarov, which are prominent representatives two generations that don't get along. Differences on various issues have always existed between the youth and the elders. Same here, rep. younger generation Yevgeny Vasilievich Bazarov cannot, and does not want to, understand the "fathers", their life credo, principles. He is convinced that their views on the world, on life, on relations between people are hopelessly outdated. “Yes, I will spoil them ... After all, this is all pride, lion's habits, foppery ...”. In his opinion, the main purpose of life is to work, to produce something material. That is why Bazarov disrespects art, sciences that do not have a practical basis. He believes that it is much more useful to deny what, from his point of view, deserves to be denied, than to watch indifferently from the side, not daring to do anything. “At the present time, denial is most useful - we deny,” says Bazarov. And Pavel Petrovich Kirsanov is sure that there are things that cannot be doubted (“Aristocracy ... liberalism, progress, principles ... art ...”). He values habits and traditions more and does not want to notice the changes taking place in society.
Bazarov is a tragic figure. It cannot be said that he defeats Kirsanov in a dispute. Even when Pavel Petrovich is ready to admit his defeat, Bazarov suddenly loses faith in his teaching and doubts his personal need for society. "Does Russia need me? No, apparently I don't," he reflects.
Of course, most of all a person is manifested not in conversations, but in deeds and in his life. Therefore, Turgenev, as it were, leads his heroes through various trials. And the strongest of them is the test of love. After all, it is in love that the soul of a person is revealed fully and sincerely.
And then hot and passionate nature Bazarova swept away all his theories. He fell in love with a woman whom he highly valued. “In conversations with Anna Sergeevna, he expressed even more than before his indifferent contempt for everything romantic, and left alone, he indignantly recognized the romance in himself.” The hero is going through a severe mental breakdown. "...Something...was possessed in him, which he never allowed, over which he always mocked, which revolted all his pride." Anna Sergeevna Odintsova rejected him. But Bazarov found the strength to accept defeat with honor, without losing his dignity.
So all the same - did the nihilist Bazarov win or lose? It seems that in the test of love, Bazarov is defeated. First, his feelings and himself are rejected. Secondly, he falls into the power of the aspects of life he himself denies, loses ground under his feet, begins to doubt his views on life. His life position turns out to be a pose in which, however, he sincerely believed. Bazarov begins to lose the meaning of life, and soon loses life itself. But this is also a victory: love made Bazarov take a different look at himself and the world, he begins to understand that life does not want to fit into a nihilistic scheme in anything.
And Anna Sergeevna formally remains among the winners. She managed to cope with her feelings, which strengthened her self-confidence. In the future, she will build a sister well, and she herself will successfully marry. But will she be happy?
F.M. Dostoevsky "Crime and Punishment"."Crime and Punishment" is ideological novel, in which non-human theory collides with human feelings. Dostoevsky, a great connoisseur of the psychology of people, a sensitive and attentive artist, tried to understand modern reality, to determine the degree of influence on a person of the then popular ideas of the revolutionary reorganization of life and individualistic theories. Entering into polemics with democrats and socialists, the writer sought to show in his novel how the delusion of fragile minds leads to murder, shedding of blood, maiming and breaking young lives.
Raskolnikov's ideas are generated by abnormal, humiliating conditions of life. In addition, the post-reform breakup destroyed the age-old foundations of society, depriving human individuality of connection with long-standing cultural traditions society, historical memory. Raskolnikov sees a violation of universal moral norms at every step. It is impossible to feed a family with honest labor, so the petty official Marmeladov finally becomes an inveterate drunkard, and his daughter Sonechka is forced to trade herself, because otherwise her family will die of hunger. If unbearable living conditions push a person to violate moral principles, then these principles are nonsense, that is, they can be ignored. Raskolnikov comes to this conclusion when a theory is born in his inflamed brain, according to which he divides all of humanity into two unequal parts. On the one hand, this strong personalities, "super-humans" such as Mohammed and Napoleon, and on the other - a gray, faceless and submissive crowd, which the hero awards with a contemptuous name - "trembling creature" and "anthill".
The correctness of any theory must be confirmed by practice. And Rodion Raskolnikov conceives and carries out the murder, removing the moral prohibition from himself. His life after the murder turns into a real hell. A painful suspicion develops in Rodion, which gradually turns into a feeling of loneliness, rejection from everyone. The writer finds a surprisingly accurate expression characterizing internal state Raskolnikov: he "as if with scissors cut himself off from everyone and everything." The hero is disappointed in himself, believing that he did not pass the test for the role of the ruler, which means, alas, he belongs to the "trembling creatures".
Surprisingly, Raskolnikov himself would not want to be the winner now. After all, to win means to perish morally, to remain with your spiritual chaos forever, to lose faith in people, yourself and life. Raskolnikov's defeat was his victory - a victory over himself, over his theory, over the Devil, who took possession of his soul, but could not forever displace God in it.
M.A. Bulgakov "Master and Margarita". This novel is too complex and multifaceted, the writer touched on many topics and problems in it. One of them is the problem of the struggle between good and evil. In The Master and Margarita, the two main forces of good and evil, which, according to Bulgakov, should be in balance on Earth, are embodied in the images of Yeshua Ha-Notsri from Yershalaim and Woland - Satan in human form. Apparently, Bulgakov, in order to show that good and evil exist outside of time and for thousands of years people live according to their laws, placed Yeshua at the beginning of a new time, in the fictional masterpiece of the Master, and Woland, as the arbiter of cruel justice, in Moscow in the 30s. XX century. The latter came to Earth to restore harmony where it had been broken in favor of evil, which included lies, stupidity, hypocrisy and, finally, betrayal that filled Moscow. Good and evil in this world are surprisingly closely intertwined, especially in human souls. When Woland, in a scene in a variety show, tests the audience for cruelty and decapitates the entertainer, and compassionate women demand to put her in her place, the great magician says: “Well ... they are people like people ... Well, frivolous ... well, what same... and mercy sometimes knocks on their hearts... ordinary people... - and loudly orders: "Put on your head." And then we observe how people are fighting because of the gold coins that fell on their heads.
The novel "The Master and Margarita" is about the responsibility of a person for the good and evil that is done on earth, for his own choice life paths leading to truth and freedom or to slavery, betrayal and inhumanity. It all-conquering love and creativity, elevating the soul to the heights of true humanity.
The author wanted to proclaim: the victory of evil over good cannot become end result social and moral confrontation. This, according to Bulgakov, is not accepted by human nature itself, should not be allowed by the entire course of civilization.
Of course, the range of works in which the thematic direction"Victory and defeat", is much broader. The main thing is to see the principle, to understand that victory and defeat are relative concepts.
Wrote about it R. Bach in the book "Bridge Through Eternity": “The important thing is not whether we lose the game, but how we lose and how we change because of this, what we bring out for ourselves, how we can apply it in other games. In a strange way, defeat turns out to be victory.”
Not everything goes smoothly in life and business. In general, everything never goes smoothly. But sometimes things happen in life that in general, well, a complete failure. Well, here's the full one. This is when you want to fall into the ground. And it seems like you tried to do everything, tried your best, but it didn’t work out. You tried to fix everything and prevent failure, you strived for the goal - but it didn’t work out. And not only did it fail - it failed miserably. What he hoped for and what he aspired to - it turned out exactly the opposite - this is a defeat.
This is one of the most serious trials for a man - a test of defeat. At these moments, the personality of a person manifests itself most vividly. From shades of gray it becomes black and white. How to survive defeat and get the most out of it while remaining on the bright side of life - a few tips on what to do during this very difficult time for you.
Take a break so as not to break firewood
If a failure happened and you can’t fix anything, you need to pause. Eat Twix. The train left, the plaster was removed - the Client left. Everything happened. It is pointless to twitch and fuss. Take a breath and calm down. One breath does not help, take several. The blood is still boiling, you sort through the events in your head last days, hours, minutes, trying to figure out why. Who is to blame for why this happened. In these moments, images of what will happen next appear in my head. What a shame and all. Now it doesn't matter. It turned out what happened. And you won't get it back. It doesn't mean that you don't care. If you don't care, that's a big problem in the future. But now we need to calm down, otherwise you can break firewood. The people break the biggest firewood right after they realize that everything is a failure.
Tomorrow comes tomorrow. And today's problems will no longer seem so terrible. There will be horror, horror. Not horror, horror, horror :)
So take a break. All the worst is in the past. And this is so - the very charm of defeat, that it cannot be worse. And this is good.
Show your dignity
Ooooh. How I love watching people in situations like this. It's such a litmus test. In these moments your worst features character and nature try to break all fetters, break all restrictions. And if this happens - this is the real defeat. This is a total fakap. Therefore, at such moments, just crush it in yourself with an effort of will. Show your dignity. This is respect for the one whose fault you have problems - the enemy, competitor, boss. This is respect for those around you who were in this business.
Showing dignity is much easier if you pause and calm down. It's just a lot easier. But even if you could not calm down and everything is in full swing - show dignity. Otherwise, you will regret it for the rest of your life.
Those who show dignity in such situations are remembered and then it is much easier for them to move on. And this is good.
Support others
The people around you, the people who were with you in this project, business, game - it's very hard for them now. They, the members of your team, are now more vulnerable than ever. It is at these moments that teams are truly formed or fall apart completely. In moments of experiencing defeat. Support your own, support with a word, a joke and your behavior. It's incredibly difficult. But that's how true leaders emerge and that's how real teams are formed. It is very difficult. But as soon as you overcome this barrier and start doing it at this difficult moment, you will like it. I know for myself. And you will like how many of those who are close to you - together with you and with your help, are experiencing this defeat. There will be those who will not be able to overcome themselves. They will be rude, fight in hysterics, do things that they will later regret very much. But this is a great litmus test for you. You will never know this ordinary life. And this is good.
learn the lessons
Immediately drawing conclusions after a defeat is a thankless task. Therefore, after the lapse of time, when everything had already calmed down, emotions subsided, everyone spoke out - you need to start analyzing what happened after all. Be sure to conduct an internal analysis of why this happened. Without self-flagellation and all that. By myself. And learn the lessons. Believe me, the most best lessons you will extract from the defeats. Own defeats. And try not to forget them. Because if you make the same mistake twice, it already looks like a clinical case. And such cases are very difficult to treat.
So learn from this unique experience. They will make you wiser, much more secure from future defeats and mistakes.
And this is good.
Enjoy
In the end, you must understand. That defeat, so bitter at the moment of its experience, is one of the most best moments in your life. The best in terms of your height, the best in terms of how much it protects you from further even more high-profile defeats. For one beaten they give two not beaten. And this is a medical fact. I, for one, am always afraid to hire people who haven't had any defeats and everything went smoothly. They either lie, or they were fine before that. And that means it's a big risk. Because people who have experienced defeat acquire something that is impossible to get otherwise. Some sort of immunity. So enjoy it all - you've been given a painful inoculation. It is painful or even very painful - but it will protect you from real illness. And this is good.
The sooner you start moving on with the lessons learned and positive mood, the faster you will survive the bitterness of defeat and the closer you will be to new successes. Therefore, do not drag out the process of experiencing defeat. And move forward. And remember - for one beaten they give two unbeaten. Now you are beaten. And this is good.
Summary
As you already understood - defeat, if everything is done correctly at this moment, is the best thing that can happen to you and this is really good.
Well last tip for today. When you realize that everything is a defeat, remember this post and move strictly according to the instructions set out here. And all will be well.
So that everything is fine with you
Everyone has experienced personal and professional setbacks and major setbacks in their lives. Those who are considered to be chronic losers do not get out of this state for years, for others, defeat is an extraordinary event. Some experience such situations extremely painfully, others quickly recover and move on. The ability to accept and competently use the fail, drawing from it experience and lessons for the future is a very useful skill, psychologists say. But this also needs to be learned.
"And now - disco"
A fresh example of the collapse of hopes, illusions and expectations is the World Cup that ended in Russia. The winners rejoice, the Croatian losers and their fans are trying to come to terms with the facts. However, the latter's tears over the loss were quickly replaced by tears of happiness: the very next day after the championship, on July 16, Zagreb met the silver medalists as winners and heroes, and they themselves behaved that way. Croatia even arranged a new competition with France - on the topic of who rejoices more, and tried to at least surpass the enemy in this. The pages of Croatian fans are filled with photos of celebrations from France and Croatia, designed to show how dreary the French are celebrating, and how fun the Croats are.
But in the first minutes after the end of the final match, the Croats were overcome by very conflicting feelings, which they shared with the MIR 24 columnist.
“We were unlucky with the first two goals, although it's hard to say that ours played poorly. They played excellently, and, I think, better than the French. But we didn't have enough luck. A little more and we would have overcome them. But, in any case, I am very glad that I am in Russia. For me this is a great experience. We also visited Nizhny Novgorod everything is fine,” said Marco (looking, to put it mildly, saddened).
“We are very pleased with this spectacle and the results of our team. We think that we were better than the French and lost undeservedly (one penalty is worth something). But the French turned out to be more effective, they used their chance, but we did not. That's all. The French are younger, but our team is better. And for a small country that we are, this is in any case an excellent result. And we don’t look happy because we are tired – many of them flew in on the morning of July 15 specifically for the final match, didn’t sleep for 24 hours, and now we have to fly home. Some of our compatriots spent almost a month in Russia, but not everyone could afford it - someone had to work. Therefore, we did not see anything in Russia, except for the bus, the airport and the stadium, which we really liked. I hope that on our next visit - which, no doubt, will take place soon - we will see more, ”Damir hopes.
“It was the greatest match for Croatia. Our players played very emotionally, but we were really unlucky. I don't think there should have been a penalty. But I am very proud of my country, although I counted, like everyone else, on the victory of our team. One way or another, we saw great football, our team is the best, and the French just wisely used all the chances, ”Davor is sure.
“I don’t want to talk to anyone now, but I want to cry. I want and I will, don't shoot me, - Jacob was upset. - Some played terribly, but don't print that. And the weather was terrible, and when we lost, it started to rain. Heaven wept with us. This is true".
“You know what… We lost, yes. I can’t say that we won, in spite of everything - this did not happen. It's terrible, just a nightmare. But personally I am very happy! Like why! Because I flew to Moscow, because the Croats were dancing today,” Kreshemin rejoiced with a huge (and obviously not the first) glass of beer in his hand.
Domagoj, the namesake of one of the Croatian national team players, was also upset and happy at the same time. “But the game was good anyway! We lost - ok, it's over. Do not hang myself now in Red Square! And now we're going to have a drink. Where is your club with beer and punk rock? he asked.
Luke didn't know what to say at all. “What can I say! I flew in for a company with friends, I myself am not a fan at all. Well, ours lost, it's sad, but not the end of the world,” the guest from Croatia said gloomily.
"Independent arbitrator" - Russian football fan Vladimir was objective. “The game was interesting, I feel sorry for the Croats, although the French won with dignity. The goals were scored beautifully and very competently, the fight was fair. The French are a serious team, and the Croats are young, let them train further,” he advises.
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger"
Everything depends on the personal perception of the loss by the person himself, the psychotherapist, coach is sure Alexander Polishchuk: attitude to what happened will determine both feelings and further actions. “Either the attitude “I’m bad, I’m a loser, I’ll never succeed, it’s all not mine”, psychotrauma, or a person realizes: yes, it’s unpleasant, sad, insulting, but this is experience, and experience makes us stronger . Therefore, it is important to learn how to translate any loss into experience. Defeat is not a failure, not a crime, it is a mistake, and a mistake is equal to experience. Therefore, some advantages can already be drawn from the experience,” he says.
Hence - the first rule: to find pluses even in defeat, without belittling the minuses. The defeat must be recognized as a fact, but further analyzed: what can be useful from this situation in terms of further self-improvement.
The second point: a person hopes for the best, strives for the ideal, but in specific situation only does what he can. Therefore, it’s not worth reproaching yourself after the fact for not being up to par: you did exactly what was “best” in this situation. More effectively, after analyzing the mistakes, it will be possible to act tomorrow, but not “yesterday”. “Yesterday a person could jump a meter, today or tomorrow - ten. This means that yesterday the limit of his abilities was just that, and no other - he simply could not jump ten meters, ”says the expert. So, you shouldn't blame yourself for this.
The third point is reconciliation with the loss. “To be reconciled means to be at peace. Do not resist, do not be angry at your loss and at yourself, but reconcile with it. Let the couple go out, yell, get angry, and then just accept the fact. It happened, period. But you should not leave it in limbo - then you need to go to work on the mistakes, think about how to act in such a situation next time, lose in your head perfect option to do better next time,” says Alexander Polishchuk.
But the most important thing is the understanding that life always consists of a series of victories and losses. “Winning is good, but losing is also good in terms of experience and lesson learned. It is necessary to develop resistance to stress, the right attitude to the situation, which will help and support, and not kill. The more experienced a person is, the easier it is for him to accept defeat. If a person loses in the first game, it is, of course, difficult for him. If he has hundreds of games, and he did not always win, then the loss should be perceived more easily, ”the expert believes.
This begs the question: when should you stop? For example, if out of a conditional 200 games a person lost 3 times, this is one situation. If 100 is different. But does it make sense to fight if he has never won?
“Let's imagine two boxers, one of whom won 20 out of 20 fights, and the second - 20 out of 50. But the second one has much more experience, his body is trained for various surprises, and, accordingly, he also has more chances to win. In terms of experience, the number more important than quality. If out of 10 fights all 10 are lost, either this is not yours, or, on the contrary, a signal to continue, but only if the person himself likes it. The world knows success stories that came to a person only later long years hard work, this happens - although this is rather the exception to the rule. But these people did what they liked, they did not force themselves through force. Such, even if they lose 10 times out of 10, they perceive everything differently, because they play their favorite game. It helps a lot to love what you do. In this case, the loss is interpreted not as a reason to give up everything, but as an incentive to develop further,” emphasizes the interlocutor of MIR 24.
One way or another, you need to learn to lose from childhood.
“Some people are not used to losing, and this greatly hinders them. They do not know how to accept a loss, every time they give up, they avoid difficulties, look for easy ways, crave constant approval. Such people will neither be successful nor happy. Or, on the contrary, if a person is a perfectionist, he will demand from himself and from others to the maximum, which is also too much. And the reason is common: in childhood they were not taught to lose, shake hands with an opponent, go to deal with their emotions, so that they come out, “weathered”, and, finally, start working on mistakes, ”says the expert.
Athletes in this sense are a standard: they constantly play, experience both victories and defeats, because they like the process itself. “Good athletes often go into business and management - discipline helps, the ability to take yourself “by the scruff of the neck” and move towards the goal, through defeats, through “I don’t want to.” They see the meaning in this - it is necessary, therefore, it is necessary. Therefore, it is important with early years to accustom children to sports so that, falling and rising, they learn to achieve their goals,” says Alexander Polishchuk.
"Not Lucky"
As for the notorious luck, you should not rely heavily on this ephemeral phenomenon - as well as attribute all the events of your life to it.
“Luck, or chance, may exist, but they are dictated by some kind of cause-and-effect relationships. A person can say that he was unlucky - he did not have time for one minute, he went the wrong way, turned the wrong way, and so on. But, in fact, the person himself made the decision to linger, to choose a different path, his brain calculated this action based on experience. It happens that a player - a true professional in his field - got nervous, or he lost his emotional condition, instead of concentrating, he became emotionally involved in some other process. Missed something, didn’t do something, couldn’t. From the outside it seems that he, being a pro, had to cope - he was just unlucky, but the reason is that he was shot down emotional mood. Therefore, professionals train to win in all situations. Even if they are shooting around, they must do their job clearly and evenly. The essence of training is to calculate possible force majeure, to be prepared for endless surprises and options. If a person has played, including training, not 20 times, but a hundred thousand, his body is more experienced, his brain has a more extensive repertoire of options. So behind what is usually called luck and luck, in fact, there is a colossal work, ”the expert noted.
In this sense, in sports, business and personal life, the principles are the same. “No matter where the loss happened - on the football field, in a career or in personal relationships, you need to accept the fact and not resist it. Yes, it happened, but this does not mean that I am bad, worthless and weak. You cannot automatically attribute all these qualities to yourself in the event of a loss. You need to let yourself cool down, as they say, spend the night with these thoughts, and then mobilize and analyze the mistakes. To understand what advantages there were in this situation, to thank myself for these advantages, for trying, and further, having understood what is necessary for victory, tune in precisely to it, ”summed up Alexander Polishchuk.
